Dragon Laffs #2015


It’s Saturday, and I’m working again.  But, I only have one class today and I’m only working on Saturday.  So I SHOULD be able to get a Monday issue out this weekend, but this is Saturday’s issue we’re dealing with, so let’s talk about Saturday type stuff.  And that means anything from Wednesday (when I finished the last issue) till Saturday (when I anticipate this issue will be read). 

So, right now, as I’m writing this, it’s Thursday, late afternoon.  I got off work a little bit early, so I thought I’d throw an hour at this before I have to go to my LEPC meeting tonight.  So, for those of you who don’t know, LEPC is Local Emergency Planning Committee.  It is a county organization that I am required, by Department of the Air Force Regulation, to be a part of.  And actually, because of where our base sits, we belong to three different county LEPCs.  And because there is me, my deputy, and my assistant deputy, each of us takes a different county.  I take the county the base actually sits in, which I consider to be the “main” county.  My deputy takes the county that is the “biggest” county in the area (which is why we also belong to that county) and the assistant deputy takes the county that we also sit a tiny portion in (one far end of the runway sits in another county) and is the third in line as he is in seniority.  BUT, he has the highest aspirations and has a declared goal of having my job in 3 years time.  Which, is a pretty good goal seeing as how I don’t retire until 3 1/2 to 4 years from now. 

And I approved his goal on his personal progress plan…

Which surprised the hell out of him…

And I told him I would do what I could to help him achieve his goal. 

So, that was a lot more information than you needed to know.  Anyway, there’s lots to go over today.  Including some mail, so let’s get started, shall we?

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words…

“Lemme get a Grande Iced Mocha, No Foam, Quad, Soy, Hexagon, Vortex, Hypothesis, with Steamed Ice.”

I used to LOVE that show!!!!

STOP TAKING FACEBOOK SO SERIOUSLY!  MOST OF YOUR LIKES ARE COMING FROM PEOPLE ON THE TOILET!

I literally have over 75% of these STILL, I think I have owned ALL of these at some point in my life and one of these, was the very first album that I ever bought for myself with my own money!  Any guesses as to which one it was?  Anyone? 

Go ahead…

Take a guess…

Okay…

I’ll tell you…

The answer is…

The very first album…

That I ever bought…

For myself…

With my very own money…

On my own…

Was…

As HUGE a fan of the Moody Blues as I am it wasn’t them!…

It was…

Deep Purple: Machine Head with not only Smoke on the Water, but what I think is one of the most fantastic Side B songs of all times…Lazy.

Welcome to my misaligned youth.

The biggest joke on mankind is that computers have started asking humans to prove that they aren’t a robot.

Another bring your pet to work pic.  I’ll leave it up to you to figure out which is the pet and which is the employee.

I miss the old-time movie stars.  You know, the ones who wore clothes and had talent.

Out of all the inventions in the last 100 years, the dry erase board is probably the most remarkable.

This happened yesterday and is important information for our age
 group.  Especially those of us over 65. 

A friend had his 4th dose of the vaccine – the “booster” at a CVS Pharmacy, after which he began to have blurred vision on the way home. 

When he did get home, he immediately called the pharmacy for advice about seeing a doctor, or to be hospitalized. He was told NOT to go to a doctor or a hospital, but to immediately return to the pharmacy and pick up his glasses.

Our locker room area is a little different than most others, too.

It’s too bad that even at our age, we’re not mature enough to meet for “A” drink, because it will somehow turn into 7 drinks, 5 shots, 3 bottles of wine, and a 2-day hangover.

And you say that like it’s a bad thing…

Just What The Fuck?

Man, they took his horde and everything!!!

Don’t let anyone else ruin your day. 

It’s YOUR day. 

Ruin it yourself.

This damn woman in the gas station just ignored the no pet sign and brought that camel toe in anyway…

There must be one hell of an explanation behind this sign…I know I sure have questions…

“Lemon Pickers Needed”, read the ad in the newspaper.  

 Ms. Sally Mulligan of Clearwater Beach, Florida, saw it, and decided to apply for one of the jobs that most Americans are not willing to do.

 She submitted her application for a job in a Florida lemon grove, but seemed far too qualified for the job.

 She has a liberal arts degree from Texas Tech, and a master’s degree from the University of Tennessee.

 For a number of years, she had worked as a social worker, and also as a school teacher.  

 The foreman studied her application, frowned, and said, “I see that you are well educated, and have an impressive resume. “However, I have to ask you, have you had any actual experience in picking lemons?”

“Well, as a matter of fact, I have,” she said. “I’ve been divorced three times, owned two Chryslers, voted twice for Obama, once for Hillary and most recently for Biden.”  

 She started work yesterday.

I can’t wait for warm summer nights, outside on the patio. 

*326 mosquitos liked your post*

HOT older men in YOUR area want to know if YOU have been playing with the damn THERMOSTAT?

And that’s it for today my friends.  We’ll see what happens over the weekend.  Love and happiness to you all.

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1 Response to Dragon Laffs #2015

  1. Friggin Pete says:

    What’s my first thought about the toilet? I couldn’t give two shit one way or the other….

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