As you can probably tell by the above picture, I’m getting a little annoyed.

I have an upcoming eye appointment, a follow-up to the testing that I did the other day, and an upcoming dental consultation, that is not for several weeks yet. Today, as I’m writing this, is Thursday, the eye appointment is on Tuesday, I just saw the eye doctor this past Tuesday … two days ago. I have, in the last two days received 4 text messages, to which I have responded yes to (as in yes, I will be there for my appointment) an email that I responded to, and now, just about a minute ago, a bloody automated phone call!

For the dental consultation, it hasn’t been that bad, one voicemail and two text messages, but like I said, that’s still a few weeks away!

Are people so incredibly forgetful that they need that many reminders? Do they not put appointments in calendars? Do they not use the built-in calendars on their phones? I know of some people who still carry around paper date books and I don’t have a problem with that, you do you. I would love to be able to do that. I tried that because I like being able to see all that at one glance where my phone doesn’t really let me do that unless I have a magnifying glass with me, but then I never had it with me … the date book, not the magnifying glass. But are there that many people who don’t use anything and need to be treated like a recalcitrant 6 year-old who refuses to wear a raincoat when it’s storming outside?

Stop bothering me with this utter nonsense!

It’s like the person who recognizes someone on a Base wide email that they haven’t seen for a while and decides to have a conversation with said person by hitting reply all. The rest of us DON’T WANT TO BE INVOLVED!

Why do big corporation and governments insist on killing ants with a hammer?

What do I mean by that? Everything is overkill.

I was having this conversation with someone just the other day. If someone abuses something, or does something wrong, let’s just take it away from everyone. The damn democrats are famous for this. Like they did with opioids. Some people abused them, “Take them away!” But what about us who were actually getting benefits out of them? “No, now you have to live in pain because you can’t be trusted not to be a drug seeker and abuser!” and all the other names I was called. It just pushed more people into illegal drugs. Some people are abusing guns. Take them away from everyone. It’s not gonna stop the bad guys from getting guns, it just makes it harder for the good guys to protect themselves from said bad guys.

You’re not addressing the flippin’ problem, you’re just throwing dirt at the symptoms! People aren’t showing up to their appointments on time, so we are losing money and we can’t squeeze quite so many people in. “I know, send them 27 reminders a week! That ought to do it. Who cares if we bug the crap out of them. We’re the doctors, we’re better than they are.”

I’m sick to bloody death of it!

I know, it’s a first world problem. But, it’s symptomatic of so many other things that is wrong with out world right now. Who gave it over to “them” to decide for us?

On what?

On everything! Take a look at that moron running New York City right now. He wants to arrest another country’s president … why? Not the reason he states, what’s the real reason? To prove what a badass he is? To appease his Muslim brothers? Just because he’s 9 eggs short of a dozen? Or because it is Islam’s agenda to kill all Jews? This man is trying to control EVERYTHING … and ya’ll voted him in to do it. New York City that is. He’s CRAZY! And he’s all yours. The problem is, that his crazy is contagious. ‘Cause the rest of the democratic party is catching it.

Yes, I’m ranting. I’m tired of this nonsense. So tired. Fauci… pleading the fifth on the color of his friggin’ tie. Please just throw that piece of trash in a dark, dark hole and never, ever open the door again.

I should be so mad at him. He caused COVID and my Mary died of COVID complications. But, he’s not worth my time. Or anyone else’s. He’s worth less than the scum on the bottom of your shoe. God has a special place reserved for demons and those that associated with them.

And I’ve invoked God’s name and He is reminding me that what I am doing is mostly wrong. Ranting like this. No matter the righteousness of my anger and angst. I should turn the other cheek. But … He also expects us to fight to protect our neighbors … our children … our families … our friends. I don’t fight to protect my own life, but I freely give my life for my brother.

And yes, now I’m ranting and rambling. It’s been a very long day for me, my friends, so what do you say I end this here and we get on to the good stuff, shall we? Thanks for listening to this old dragon go on a bit. Now …

What a good boy!

Seems like so long ago…

Boy’s got skills!

Not everyone will get that one, either.

Or that one…

I do … and it really wasn’t that long ago.

What in the Sam Hill is going on here? I have so many questions. Momma, is that you?

I do! I do! Loved my Lincoln Logs! And then later, the Erector Set!

A creature rose up out of the surf and came ashore. 

Its garments were made of green sea lettuce. “I am the friendly Witch of the Sand,” she said, “I am only going to sunbathe.” 

The sun was terribly hot. Her skin began to bake and it turned as red as a ripe tomato! 

What? You mean to tell me you have you ever seen …

a baking lettuce and tomato Sand Witch?

A month? They could’ve opened it the next DAY and it would’ve been messed up. Closed it up, locked it up, opened it up the day after that and it would’ve been completely different again! That’s the nature of the Tupperware!

NO! NEVER! I don’t care how bad you think the service was.

A nun asked her class to write notes to God.  Here are some of he notes the children handed in:

Dear God:
If You watch me in church on Sunday, I’ll show You my new shoes.

Dear God:
Is it true my father won’t get in Heaven if he uses his bowling words in the house?

Dear God:
I went to this wedding and they kissed right in the church. Is that okay?

Dear God:
Did You really mean “do unto others as they do unto you”? Because if You did, then I’m going to get my brother good.

Dear God:
You don’t have to worry about me; I always look both ways.

Dear GOD,
Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each other so much if they had their own rooms. It works with my brother. -Larry

Dear GOD,
I bet it is very hard for You to love all of everybody in the whole world.  There are only 4 people in our family and I can never do it. -Nan

Dear GOD,
Are You really invisible or is it just a trick? -Lucy

Dear GOD,
Did You mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident? -Norma

Dear GOD,
I think the stapler is one of your greatest inventions. -Ruth

Dear GOD,
We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday school they said You did it. So I bet he stole your idea. -Sincerely, Donna

A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter. 

Mother: “What does the cow say?”

Child: “Moooo!”

Mother: “Great! What does the cat say?”

Child: “Meow.”

Mother: “Oh, you’re so smart! What does the frog say?”

The wide-eyed little three-year-old looked up at her mother and replied, “Bud….Wise…..Er.”

What the heck were in those tablets?!?!

Out the mouths of men…..

“I’M GOING FISHING” 
Means: “I’m going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.” 

“IT’S A GUY THING” 
Means: “There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical.” 

“CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?” 
Means: “Why isn’t dinner already on the table?” 

“UH HUH,” “SURE, HONEY,” OR “YES, DEAR…” 
Means: Absolutely nothing. It’s a conditioned response. 

“IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN” 
Means: “I have no idea how it works.” 

“I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT’S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND.” 
Means: “I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra.” 

“TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU ARE WORKING TOO HARD.” 
Means: “I can’t hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.” 

“THAT’S INTERESTING, DEAR.” 
Means: “Are you still talking?” 

“YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS.” 
Means: “I remember the theme song to ‘F Troop’, the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I’ve ever owned, but I forgot your birthday.” 

“I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES.” 
Means: “The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe.” 

“OH, DON’T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT’S NO BIG DEAL.” 
Means: “I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I am hurt.” 

“HEY, I’VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I’M DOING.” 
Means: “And I sure hope I think of some pretty good reasons soon.” 

“I CAN’T FIND IT.” 
Means: “It didn’t fall into my outstretched hands, so I’m completely clueless.” 

“WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?” 
Means: “What did you catch me at?” 

“I HEARD YOU.” 
Means: “I haven’t the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don’t spend the next 3 days yelling at me.” 

“YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE” 
Means: “I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse.” 

“YOU LOOK TERRIFIC.” 
Means: “”Please don’t try on one more outfit, I’m starving.” 

“I’M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE.”  
Means: “No one will ever see us alive again.” 

“Good afternoon, Landlord, a pint of Less if you please,” said the old man. 

“Less? Never heard of it,” replied the barman.

“Oh, come now surely you have,” he persisted.

“No sorry, we certainly don’t stock it. What is it anyway? Some kind of foreign beer?” 

“Well I’m not sure,” admitted the man. “It was the doctor who mentioned it. He said I should drink Less.” 

And that’s it my friends. Gotta wrap this up. Working this weekend and cleaning up a tree on Sunday, so I’m going to try to knock out Monday’s episode tomorrow (Friday). Hopefully I can get that done, I might have a little time on Saturday to get it finished off. We’ll see. But until then …