I am, once again, almost out of time to get this issue out to you for tomorrow, Saturday, so I’m going to rush to put it together. But, before I do, I have a special message.

To Chuck G., a dear old friend who I spoke to on the phone yesterday (today for me, Friday) who is a regular reader of the show. Brother, you said you sent me some old pictures that you found to the email address, but I checked all my emails and I don’t have them. Could you PLEASE resend them to impishdragon@dragonlaffs.com. I’m not sure what address you have, but whichever it is, I didn’t get them. It might be an old address that I don’t monitor anymore or don’t have access to anymore. I’m so very sorry. But I’d truly love to see those pictures.

Anyway, on to the show!

Okay … that’s a good question … and it bothers the heck out of me since I just not an hour ago finished a bacon cheese burger that was delicious. … Now I feel a little sick.

This started out as an email titled: A replacement for the blonde joke. Then it got out of hand. So, rather than break them up, here they all are:

Florida Law

It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit. 

A man’s mind, stretched by a new idea, can never go back to its original dimension. 

-Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr., (1809 – 1894)

Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Mrs. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. 

Smiling sweetly, the teacher said, “Bobby, when I was a child, I was told that if I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that.” 

Bobby looked up and replied, “Well, Mrs. Smith, you can’t say you weren’t warned.” 

Georgia, St. Mary’s Law

No spitting on the sidewalk is permitted after dark.

The Italian immigrant went to the doctor to complain that he wasn’t sure how to make his new wife pregnant. 

After struggling with language problems, the doctor simplified his advice just stick your longest thing where your wife is hairiest. 

Two months later, the Italian came back to complain that it didn’t work. 

“I’ve been sticking my nose in her armpit every night,” he said, “and nothing’s happened.”

See, there’s two ways of looking at that. In MY class, you wouldn’t be able to get IN the class if you are late. Because my class is participatory and I’m not starting over if you’re late and everyone else was on time. My class is also military, you’re EXPECTED to be on time, I don’t care who you are. I’ve chased Majors away who’ve shown up late. He wasn’t happy, in fact, he spread a rumor that I would let him in because he wasn’t early enough. That I said if you weren’t ten minutes early you were late, which wasn’t true. That is the way I feel and what I’ve said, but never held anyone to. See, in my class, it’s easy.  My class starts at 0800. Reveille plays over all the loud speakers on base at … you guessed it … 0800.  It’s REALLY EASY to know if you are late to my class or not. The Major was about ten minutes late. I also asked him what sort of example he was setting for the younger airman by showing up late. Why not just take the no-show and reschedule. He didn’t appreciate that at all. Oh well. As a civilian specialist, I don’t answer to him and I don’t care. I have a job to do and I do it…very well.

The other way of looking at it, why would the teacher ever ask, “Is that my fault.” The correct way of handling it, if you are going to let them enter late, then don’t draw attention to them, let them enter OR tell them, “You’re late, get out, reschedule.” like I do.

For all those looking for a new puppy, you may be impressed by all the new dogs available as a result of creative cross-breeding. The following breeds are now being considered for recognition by the Kennel Club 

        Collie + Lhasa Apso
        Collapso, a dog that folds up for easy transport. 

        Spitz + Chow Chow
        Spitz-Chow, a dog that throws up a lot. 

        Pointer + Setter
        Poinsetter, the traditional Christmas pet. 

        Great Pyrenees + Dachshund 
        Pyradachs, a puzzling breed. 

        Pekingese + Lhasa Apso
        Peekasso, an abstract dog. 

        Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel 
        Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as mountain air. 

        Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever 
        Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists. 

        Newfoundland + Basset Hound 
        Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors. 

        Terrier + Bulldog
        Terribull, not a good dog. 

        Bloodhound + Labrador
        Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly. 

        Malamute + Pointer
        Moot Point, owned by…oh, well, it doesn’t matter anyway. 

        Collie + Malamute
        Commute, a dog that travels to work. 

        Deerhound + Terrier
        Derriere, a dog that’s true to the end. 

        Bull Terrier + Shitzu
        You figure this one out! 

After the first week of sex education class, a young shapely teen stormed out of the room after the class was over. 

Encountering a female friend in the hall, the friend asked, “Lori, what in the world is the matter with you ?  You look as if you’re about to kill someone.” 

“I am !!!” Lori fumed. “You just wait until I catch up with that Dennis. 

All summer long, that clown had me convinced that ‘foreplay’ involved tossing a coin for position.” 

I before E

Except when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from feisty caffeinated weightlifters.

Weird.

And that’s it my friends. I’m out of time, strength and patience. I’ve got to get some sleep so I can get up and do it all over again tomorrow. Be well my dear friends and Chuck, send me those pictures! LOL!

I have to apologize.

I’m in a mood today.

I’m writing this on Sunday and things are weighing heavily on my mind today. I have been reliving … things. There is no special dates or anniversaries or anything.  Things have just been … on my mind.  I’m reliving too much. WAY too much.

So, what do you say we get to the good stuff, so that this old dragon can do a little bit to change his attitude.

Ha! Amateur!

There are people in our government who are just like this.

Okay, as reminiscent as this is of the Mark of the Beast, which is the first thing that I thought of when I saw this picture, when I checked it out this is what I found out.

Amazon One is a biometric palm-scanning technology introduced by Amazon in 2020 that allows users to pay, enter locations, and verify their identity by hovering their palm over a specialized scanner. It acts as a digital, contactless, and, according to Amazon, highly secure alternative to physical wallets, credit cards, badges, and tickets. 

Note on Status: In January 2026, Amazon announced it is discontinuing the Amazon One palm-scanning service for retail businesses, with services officially shutting down on June 3, 2026. However, it may continue to be used in certain, non-retail contexts (e.g., specific security or healthcare applications).

Not Wendy’s!!!!!

Worms

Thanks to Lynn

The Myth of the “Emergency Evacuation”

When we see dozens of earthworms stranded on the pavement after a downpour, the logical assumption is that they came up to avoid drowning.

 

The Biological Reality: This is a complete misunderstanding of their anatomy.

Earthworms, such as the common nightcrawler (Lumbricus terrestris), do not have lungs. They rely entirely on cutaneous respiration—they breathe through their skin. As long as the rainwater is oxygenated, an earthworm can survive completely submerged for days, or even weeks. They are not running away from the water. They are exploiting it.

The Scientific Reality: The UV Trap

An earthworm is a deep-dwelling (anecic) species, but it relies on the surface for food and movement.

The Frictionless Highway: Crawling across dry ground is a physical impossibility for a worm. The friction would tear its delicate epidermis and instantly drain its internal moisture. Rain creates a temporary, zero-friction film on the surface of the earth. This allows the worm to glide across the ground, covering distances in a few hours that would take days to tunnel through heavy, compacted clay.

The Solar Paralysis: The true danger of the sidewalk isn’t the puddle; it is the sun. Earthworms possess light-sensitive cells along their bodies (negative phototaxis). If the rain stops and ultraviolet (UV) rays pierce the clouds, the light acts as a neurotoxin. The worm is literally paralyzed by the UV exposure before it can reach the safety of the grass. It is a traveler struck down by the light, doomed to desiccate on the concrete.

What is Happening Right Now (February)

Why take this massive risk in the late winter?

In many parts of the United States, February brings the first significant thaws and heavy, saturating rains.

The Energy Equation: When the soil hits maximum saturation capacity, the oxygen pressure underground drops slightly. It becomes physiologically and energetically much cheaper for the worm to travel above ground than to push through dense, cold mud.

The Mating Window: Earthworms are hermaphrodites, but they must physically meet to exchange genetic material. The mild, wet nights of late February offer the perfect, low-predator window to leave their vertical burrows, cross the wet leaf litter, and find a mate before the dry spring winds harden the topsoil.

Why This Matters Ecologically

The earthworm is the chief engineer of the terrestrial ecosystem.

They do not merely aerate the soil. They create the drilosphere—the millimeter-thick lining of their burrows that is exponentially richer in nitrogen and beneficial bacteria than the surrounding dirt.

Right now, their deep, vertical burrows act as a vital civil defense system. These tunnels (macropores) are an emergency drainage network, allowing heavy late-winter rains to infiltrate rapidly into the water table. This invisible infrastructure is what prevents surface runoff, stops severe soil erosion, and mitigates localized flooding.

Practical Action: The “Rescue Without Rubbing” Protocol

Move Them: They are physically incapable of digging through asphalt. Gently pick the stranded worm up (they have no teeth and cannot bite) and place it on the nearest lawn, garden bed, or under wet leaves.

Never Wipe Them Dry: The viscous mucus covering their body is quite literally their lung. If that slime is wiped off, oxygen can no longer dissolve into their tissue, and they will suffocate.

The Flashlight Check: Take a flashlight out on a drizzly February night. You will see them stretched out of their burrows, their tails firmly anchored in the hole, grabbing dead leaves to drag down into the depths. It is the ultimate recycling crew at work.

The Verdict

The worm on the sidewalk isn’t a drowning victim. It is a sprinter caught between stations because the highway evaporated too quickly.

The rain was its boarding pass; the sun is its executioner.

By moving it two feet to the grass, you don’t just save a life—you put the planet’s most indispensable worker back on the job.

Scientific References & Evidence

Soil Ecology & Drainage: USDA Natural Resources Conservation Service (NRCS). “Earthworms.” (Details the creation of the drilosphere, the formation of macropores, and their critical role in water infiltration and flood mitigation).

Behavior & Phototaxis: Edwards, C. A., & Bohlen, P. J. (1996). “Biology and Ecology of Earthworms.” (The definitive text documenting the triggers for surface migration, cutaneous respiration limits, and the paralyzing effects of UV radiation).

As a Gen Xer, I’ve walked like an Egyptian, moonwalked, walked this way, walked on the wild side, walked on sunshine, walked the line and walked 500 miles.

I’ve walked a lot …

I’m tired

This one always brings a tear to my eye.

The first person who pulled an egg out from under a chicken’s butt and ate it must have been really hungry.

If you don’t recognize this picture, then you had a much poorer childhood then I did.

AND because they bought into a lie.

I hate waiting in lines…

I wish this woman would just hurry up and pick a suspect.

When I discovered I was holding the Tazer the wrong way, I was stunned.

Yup, this one is shorter.  I ran out of time. So, until next time …

So, today is Saturday and we have another issue where it’s a race for the border … okay, probably not the best euphemism with everything that’s going on with ICE and stuff right now, but you get the idea. I have no time, but I’m trying to get this done so that you guys have an issue for Monday.

I actually got off work a little earlier than I expected, so that’s making this even possible. So, let’s do this.

We’re going to start off with something that’s not really a laughing matter. We had some stormy weather the other day here in Indiana, and there was actually a pretty decent tornado that touched down near Bloomington. Someone got a GREAT picture of it, too. 

By the way, that’s on my own personal “Bucket List”. Get a good, up close and personal picture of a tornado. I know it sounds nuts, but it is kinda my job, being an Emergency Manager and all. It used to drive Mary and Izzy nuts and now it just drives Izzy nuts when the siren goes off and I chase her and the dogs down to the basement and I grab my phone and head outside to see if I can’t get a picture.

My excuse? “Hey! I’m a professional! I know what I’m doin’!”

Anyway, check out this great picture someone got. And then the one afterward is some of the horrible aftermath. That’s always the crappy part, right?

That’s pretty bad. I haven’t heard anything about casualties, so prayers are still going out. So, now we’ll move on.

Izzy sent that one to me and it is probably the worst thing I’ve ever heard in my life! Just imagine what this poor girl is going to go through growing up! Let’s hope she has a decent middle name she can go by.

WILDLIFE?! I ain’t Wildlife!!!

Okay, this one is from Stephanie and is well worth watching … so click

HERE

NEVER!!!!

Shameful! But, it happens.

That’s funny, because I made up Get Out of Jail, Free cards that look just like the Monopoly ones that at the bottom have the name and address of our church on them that I pass out at Jail Ministry when someone is ready to get out and invite them to our church.

Another way of looking at that is if the devil is getting in your way a lot, it’s because he doesn’t want you going in that direction.

Illinois, Freeport  Law

In the 60’s and 70’s Freeport, IL had a law that all juke boxes had to be free play. 

A tavern could have a juke box but could not charge. It had to do with the mafia moving into control things. 

A father was reading Bible stories to his young son.

He read, “The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt.” 

His son asked,  “What happened to the flea?”

As Barb was getting to know David and his family, she was very impressed by how much his parents loved each other. 

“They’re so thoughtful,” Barb said. “Why, your dad even brings your mom a cup of hot coffee in bed every morning.” 

After a time, Barb and David were engaged, and then married. 

On the way from the wedding to the reception, Barb again remarked on David’s loving parents, and even the coffee in bed. 

“Tell me,” she said, “does it run in the family?” 

“It sure does,” replied David. “And I take after my mom.”

Letters Of Recommendations For Employees


For the chronically absent:

“A man like him is hard to find.”

“It seemed his career was just taking off.”


For the office drunk:

“I feel his real talent is wasted here.”

“We generally found him loaded with work to do.”


For an employee with no ambition:

“He could not care less about the number of hours he had to put in.” 

“You would indeed be fortunate to get this person to work for you.” 

“He consistently achieves the standards he sets for himself.” 


For an employee who is so unproductive that the job is better left unfilled: 

“I can assure you that no person would be better for the job.” 


For an employee who is not worth further consideration as a job candidate: 

“I would urge you to waste no time in making this candidate an offer of employment.” 

“All in all, I cannot say enough good things about this candidate or recommend him too highly.” 

16 of the Dumbest Ways People Have Tragically Passed

Why does it take two weeks to take off three pounds and only two days to gain ’em back?

I don’t understand why the US stopped making pennies. It just doesn’t make cents …

I’ve been alive my whole life and not once have I seen a commercial for Chinese food.

I made it, it’s done, I’m happy, I hope you guys are, too. I enjoyed this one. Love and happiness, ya’ll.

Well, gonna make this quick. This is gonna be a down and dirty, quick and easy issue. It has been one of those weeks and is looking to be a LONG weekend. So, I want to put something together so that you guys will have a bit of a laugh for the weekend.

So, without further ado…

A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it taint mine.

A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong.
– Milton Berle (1908-2002)

Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some people abuse the privilege. 

Georgia, Columbus Law
 
No one may practice the business of tattooing on Sunday. 

Below is an actual letter sent to a Bank in the United States. 

The Bank Manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.


Dear Sir:

I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. 
By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have lapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. 
I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire salary, an arrangement which, I admit, has only been in place for eight years. 

You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $50 by way of penalty for the inconvenience I caused to your bank. 
My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways. 
You have set me on the path of fiscal righteousness. 
No more will our relationship be blighted by these unpleasant incidents, for I am restructuring my affairs in 2026, taking as my model the procedures, attitudes and conduct of your very bank.

I can think of no greater compliment, and I know you will be excited and proud to hear it. To this end, please be advised of the following changes:

I have noticed that whereas I personally attend to your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, ever-changing, prerecorded, faceless entity which your bank has become.

From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person.

My mortgage and loan repayments will, therefore and hereafter, no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your branch whom you must nominate. 
You will be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. 
Please find attached an Application Contact Status which I require your chosen employee to complete. 
I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative. 
Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof.

In due course, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. 
I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required to access my account balance on your phone bank service.

As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. 
Let me level the playing field even further by introducing you to my new telephone system, which you will notice, is very much like yours. 

My Authorized Contact at your bank, the only person with whom I will have any dealings, may call me at any time and will be answered by an automated voice service: Press buttons as follows:
1. To make an appointment to see me.
2. To query a missing payment.
3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.
5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.
7. To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is required. Password will be communicated at a later date to the Authorized Contact. 
8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.
9. To make a general complaint or inquiry.

The contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service.

While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call. 
This month, I’ve chosen a refrain from The Best of Woody Guthrie: “Oh, the banks are made of  marble, With a guard at every door, And the vaults are filled with silver, that the miners sweated for.”

On a more serious note, we come to the matter of cost. 
As your bank has often pointed out, the ongoing drive for greater efficiency comes at a cost which you have always been quick to pass on to me. 
Let me repay your kindness by passing some costs back. 
First, there is a matter of advertising material you send me. 
This I will read for a fee of $20 per page. 
Inquiries from the Authorized Contact will be billed at $5 per minute of my time spent in response. 
Any debits to my account, as, for example, in the matter of the penalty for the dishonored check, will be passed back to you. 
My new phone service runs at 75 cents a minute. You will be well advised to keep your inquiries brief and to the point.

Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement. 

May I wish you a happy, if ever-so-slightly less prosperous, New Year?

Your Humble Client,

(Name Withheld)

As part of its new disaster recovery plan, this Australian company takes out a lease on a secondary site about an hour outside of town from its headquarters, says an IT consultant hired to advise the company. 

“The place was perfect,” the consultant says. “It was an old warehouse that had been converted into offices and a call center. 

It had everything, and the owner was happy to sign a long lease, as the property had sat vacant since the dot-com collapse.” 

Six months later, the company is ready for a trial run of its disaster plan and invites the consultant back to watch the drill. 

“Everyone turns up at work and is told that due to ‘biowarfare,’ the office is unusable for the foreseeable future,” he says. 

“Everyone grabs what they can, then climbs onto a bus and heads off to the country.” 

An hour and a half later, the bus pulls up at a lovely piece of land, vacant except for some construction machinery. 

“Where’s our secondary site?” the company CEO chokes out. 

“The site was sold two months ago,” workers tell him. “We’re just finishing the leveling.” 

“What about the furniture and equipment inside the old building?” asks the CEO. 

“It was all just bulldozed into the landfill at the back of the lot,” the crew’s foreman says. 

After another long bus ride and several days of witch-hunting, the truth comes out. 

“A junior accountant had been given the job of looking for wasted expenditure and had come across the lease on the secondary site,” says the consultant. 

Since the company had no business out that way and the site did not produce any income, he had deduced that it was a wasted expenditure and had the lease cancelled. 

The owner of the site had then, in disgust, sold the property.

That accountant is still looking for gainful employment.

My 17 year old daughter, Steph who had just received her provisional diving licence offered to drive us to church. 

After a wild ride, we finally reached our destination.

Steph’s mother got out of the car and said, “Thank you.” 

“Anytime,” Steph replied.

As my wife slammed the door, she said, “I wasn’t talking to you. I was talking to God.” 

And that’s it.

Gotta go.

Love to you all.

Just finished the last one and immediately starting this one because I need to get ahead. 

I can’t tell you why I need to get ahead.

It may or may not be apparent by the time you read this.

At any rate, I have nothing new to add to this opening since I closed the last one, so let’s jump into the fun stuff.

Dear Mom and Dad,

Our scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and were worried. We are OK.  

Only one of our tents and two sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned because we were all up the mountain looking for Chad when it happened. 

Oh yes, please call Chad’s mother and tell her he is OK.  He can’t write because of the cast. 

I got to ride in one of the search and rescue jeeps. It was neat. We never would have found him in the dark if it wasn’t for the lightning. 

Scoutmaster Walt got mad at Chad for going on a hike alone without telling anyone. Chad said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn’t hear him. 

Did you know that if you put gas on a fire, the gas can will blow up? The wet wood didn’t burn, but one of the tents did.  Also some of our clothes. John is going to look weird until his hair grows back. 


We will be home on Saturday if Scoutmaster Walt gets the car fixed. It wasn’t his fault about the wreck.  The brakes worked OK when we left. 

Scoutmaster Walt said that a car that old you have to expect something to break down; that’s probably why he can’t get insurance.  

We think it’s a neat car. He doesn’t care if we get it dirty, and if it’s hot, sometimes he lets us ride on the fenders. 

It get pretty hot with 10 people in a car. He let us take turns riding in the trailer until the highway patrolman stopped and talked to us. Scoutmaster Walt is a neat guy. 

Don’t worry, he is a good driver. In fact, he is teaching Terry how to drive on the mountain roads where there isn’t any traffic. All we ever see up here is logging trucks. 

This morning, all of the guys were diving off the rocks and swimming out in the lake.  

Scoutmaster Walt wouldn’t let me because I can’t swim, and Chad was afraid he would sink because of his cast, so he let us take the canoe across the lake.  It was great.  You can still see some of the trees under the water from the flood. Scoutmaster Walt isn’t crabby like some scoutmasters.  He didn’t even get mad about the lifejackets. 

He has to spend a lot of the time working on the car so we are trying not to cause him any trouble. 

Guess what?  We have all passed our first aid merit badges. When Dave dove in the lake and cut his arm, we got to see how a tourniquet works. 

Wade and I threw up, but Scoutmaster Walt said it probably was just food poisoning from the leftover chicken.  

He said they got sick that way with food they ate in prison. I’m so glad he got out and became our scoutmaster. 

He said he sure figured out how to get things done better while he was doing his time. By the way, what is a pedophile? 

I have to go now.  We are going to town to mail our letters and buy bullets. Don’t worry about anything.  We are fine. 

Love, Jordie

PS: How long has it been since I had a tetanus shot?

OFFICE LANGUAGE…..

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps all over everything and then leaves.

ADMINISPHERE: The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the 0 adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.

FLIGHT RISK: Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave the company or department soon.

OHNO-SECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which realize that you’ve just made a BIG mistake. Like making the selection that reformats your hard drive.

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

I had years of private piano lessons and can now instantly tell the white keys from the black keys!

Lots of great art.

Office Inspirational Posters

–
If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday. 
–
The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts. 
–
Sure, you may not like working here, but we pay your rent.
–
If you think we’re a bad firm, you should see our rivals!
–
Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings – they did it by killing all those who opposed them. 
–
A person who smiles in the face of adversity… probably has a scapegoat. 
–
ABANDON ALL HOPE, YE WHO ENTER HERE….. We make great money! We have great benefits! We do no work! We are union members! 
–
2 days without a Human Rights Violation!
–
If at first you don’t succeed – try management.
–
It’s only unethical if you get caught.
–
Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. Never quit until you have another job. 
–
Work harder slaves!
The beatings will continue until morale improves.
–
If you can read this, you’re not working!
–
Hang in there, retirement is only thirty years away!
–
Go the extra mile – It makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker. 
–
Pride, Commitment, Teamwork: words we use to get you to work for free. 
–
Succeed in spite of management.
–
Work: It isn’t just for sleeping anymore.
–
There are two kinds of people in life: people who like their jobs, and people who don’t work here anymore. 

A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on. 

– Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)

Hey!  Remember this one?

Pop Smith added some context … In an email titled The land isn’t free but it is cheap

Thanks Pop!

I know some people like that.

I know some people like that, too.

So, my buddy Wheats sent me this picture:

Then we wondered what the Mystery Machine would look like and he said it would have to be this vehicle:

And I, of course agreed whole heartedly. But then within a few minutes, he sent me this:

Which I thought was excellent, but then he thought this was more appropriate for the time frame:

And this, dear friends, is how buddy Wheats and I spend far too much time.

AND EGGS!  YOU NEED EGGS TO MAKE FRENCH TOAST!!!!

‘It all started when…’: Pour a dash of these laughs into your morning coffee to energize you for the work week ahead (February 14, 2026)

I have questions… a LOT of questions!

If a lawyer can be disbarred can a musician be denoted or a model deposed?

And that’s it my friends.  There may or may not be an issue this Saturday. I will do my best. This was supposed to be a four day weekend for me and yet I was called in to work twice … just sayin’.  And this weekend coming up  is the UTA, so I have to work. I’m predicting a BAD week this week. So, we’ll see.

At any rate …