Just Willow and me hanging out outside the cavern. She’s been such a good girl lately. Been my friend, keeping me company.
I’ve got a couple of quick things to bring up. Tom H. brought up a mistake I made in the last issue. Great Value is a Walmart brand, not a Kroger brand. I besmirched Kroger when I should have been Besmirching Walmart. Thanks for pointing that out, Tom. My humblest apologies to Kroger. Mea Culpa. (Not sure I spelled that right)
Jerry M. said thanks for the posts making life more tolerable. Agreed Jerry. That’s why we’re all here. Helping each other keep our heads above water and laughing a little about it. Fighting the world’s bullshit with laughter. Says so in the masthead somewhere.
It’s you guys that make my life more tolerable. I appreciate each and everyone of you.
I got an email with the subject line of “.Lucrative Investment.” It went directly into my Junk Folder. I can’t understand why. It looks like a good opportunity for me. It’s from a Henry Markson who says he is an Investment Analyst and his email is email@example.com, gee, that sounds like a legitimate company email, right? Anyway, he says:
Hello, now that’s a nice professional opening, right?
I want to notify you of our client’s interest in investing in your company as a SILENT/ANGEL INVESTOR. Not sure who his “client” is, but of all the Angels I’ve met, none of them have been silent nor willing to invest in anything. So, I’m kind of curious. Especially since he doesn’t even seem to know what the name of my company is.
Please, if you wish to proceed, get back to me as soon as possible for contact details and further proceedings. I wonder what the further proceedings entail? I would bet that I would only have to send him my bank information or a small down payment to get started.
Best Regards, Does anyone ever send Worst Regards?
I don’t know…what do you guys think? I sure could use the money right now…If Lethal Leprechaun were still around, I’d get his crack legal team on it. Man I miss him. Too soon gone.
Okay, so on that happy note, let’s get on with the regular comedic stuff that you are all looking forward to. I think I’ve poked enough fun at this piece of spam.
Originally, Wrigley’s was a soap company that included baking powder as a gift with the purchase of their soap. They switched to selling baking powder when it became more popular than the soap, and included a pack of gum as a gift. When the gum became more popular than the baking powder, the company changed again and started selling gum.
Life could be worse…
…Milk could have pulp.
The Black Eyed Peas can sing us a tune, but the chick peas can only hummus one.
This is one of our corporate spies. Notice the camouflage. He is extremely good at his job.
If you go out drinking and call off work the next day…I’m here to let you know
YOU ARE SOFT!
My generation showed up for work in the same clothes we had on the night before, still wearing the wristband or hand stamp!
Question for the Day:
You see me Once in JUNE,
Twice in NOVEMBER,
And not at all in MAY.
What am I?
Answer for the day:
The letter E
The “Clinging Vine”
I have SERIOUS questions!
Counseling might help. Perhaps Group Therapy.
The problem with stealing quotes off the internet is you never know if they are genuine. ~ Abraham Lincoln
Working at an Air Force Base for a living, you have no idea how many times I still hear this one from otherwise upstanding and somewhat intelligent people. It boggles the mind.
Here’s a comment/mail from Tommy V that I want to share with the rest of you guys.
Stephanie sent this next one in and said she knew 3…
I knew 7 and remembered seeing 3 more.
When I was a very small child, my mom used to bury coins in my sandbox, leave huge boot prints in the sand, and tell me pirates had come in the night and buried treasure. I would be out there happily for hours, with my little sieve, and my mom got a quiet morning to herself for the price of a handful of pennies.
I was always kind of skeptical about Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy, because visiting every kid in the world did not seem reasonable. But the pirates only visited me, so they were probably real.
So, that’s the story of how I ended up being an archaeologist. How did you become what you are?
Them: Can we contact your previous employer to make sure you’re a good fit?
Me: Sure! As long as I can ask your previous employees why they quit.
Man! Why did I never think of that?
John S. sent me this next one in the form of a video that I can’t forward to you guys, so I’m translating it to you like this, (Thanks John)
Okay, so this rather brilliantly cuts through all the political double speak we get. It puts it into a much better perspective:
U.S. Tax Revenue: $2,170,000,000,000
Federal Budget: $3,820,000,000,000
New Debt: $1,650,000,000,000
National Debt: $29,271,000,000,000
Recent Budget Cuts: $38,500,000,000
So, now let’s remove 8 zeros each time and pretend it’s a household budget
Annual Family Income: $21,700
Money the Family Spent: $38, 200
New Debt on Credit Cards: $16,500
Outstanding Balance on Credit Cards: $292,710
Total Household Budget Cuts: $385
Does that make more sense to you?
Here’s another way to look at the debt ceiling:
Let’s say you come home from work and find that there’s been a sewer backup in your neighborhood and your home has sewage all the way up to your ceilings.
What do you think you should do? Raise the ceilings, or pump out the crap?
Your choice is coming, November 2022!
Thanks again, John.
Yes! It absolutely does!