Dragon Laffs #1921


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Good Morning My Dear Campers,

It’s Thursday and it’s been a long week.

 

 

Let's Laugh

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Did you hear about the middle school that voted to change their mascot? It was an agricultural area, but they wanted to be progressive and offer a female mascot. So, they had three choices, a female sheep, a female goat, and a female deer.

After a long campaign, a series of debates, and a day of students voting yes or no on each, the principal stood before his students and announced that, in a unanimous vote, the new school mascot would be a female sheep.

It seems that even after all the campaigning, debate, and division, the student body only had Ayes for Ewe.

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Okay, we have a new entry in the Florida Man Birthday contest … This one is from Joe L and his is from April 3rd and it reads like this: Florida authorities claim a man stabbed his ex-girlfriend with a sword and then hit her with his truck.

But, brother Joe was kind enough to send us the whole story … so there’s more!

The Citrus County Sheriff’s Office said in a press release that MPs found 42-year-old Brandi Blevins dead in her front yard on Sunday evening.

Detectives said 41-year-old Eric Huffman stabbed Blevins to death with a large sword. The sheriff’s office said a witness told them that after Huffman stabbed Blevins to death, he jumped in his truck and ran over the victim before crashing into a tree. He escaped, but was later captured. It was unclear what exactly killed Blevins.

Huffman is charged with premeditated murder and aggravated assault with deadly weapons. He’s in jail without bail.

Not bad Joe.  Not sure if it beats mine or not, but I’m going to give it points, just the same.  What are we talking about?  Why, the great Google Florida Man Challenge!  Go to Google, type in Florida man and your birthday, just month and day, and see what pops up!  Just to see how crazy it is!  And you, too can be featured here in Dragon Laffs!

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The first rule of “Condescending Club” is really kinda complex and I don’t think you’d understand it even if I explained it to you.

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Know

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The guy at the furniture store told me the sofa would seat 5 people without any problems.

Then it occurred to me, I don’t think I know 5 people without any problems.

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That’s going to be one hell of a ride!

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Dragon Pix

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“You shall not pass!”

“Wanna Bet!”

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People think I am crazy because I talk to my chickens …

What am I suppose to do when they ask me things?  Ignore them?

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Our brother and fellow camper, Sasquatch sent in a question:

I have a question.

I just read that Pelosi wants to remove all of the old useless relics of a bygone era immediately removed from the Capitol Building grounds!

Is she resigning?

Just asking.

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Fantasy

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Oh help me, help me!  I need rescuing!

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Interesting Maps

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The States In Blue Have A Smaller Population Than Los Angeles County (in Red)

Which is the best argument I can think of for the electoral college.

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When someone tells you, “pick a card, any card” …

… take their VISA.

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I woke up this morning determined to drink less, eat right, and exercise …

But that was 4 hours ago … when I was younger and full of hope.

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She said she missed me.  Normally that would be a good thing.  But she’s reloading.

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Motivational

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Farts

Fascination

Fashion Police

Fast Food

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Father and Son Activities

Fatherhood

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Fathers

Favoritism

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Um…that kinda sucks.

Me:  Welcome to my she shed.

Gynecologist:  Please stop calling it that.

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Okay, read this one first…

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Maybe not…but since I do own several of these…

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Since this is what I teach, we have (jokingly) thought about going into the local grocery store dressed like this … or walking into one of the neighborhoods with a clipboard and a big piece of chalk and just randomly placing a big X at the base of someone’s driveway and walking on … although like Mrs. Dragon pointed out, that would probably have the press called out rather quickly.  But, you can tell by looking at the suit, you can’t really tell who’s inside.  And if we were quick enough, we could freak out a whole grocery store or neighborhood and be gone before anyone could identify us.  And if we WERE caught, we could just call it a training exercise.

Breathtaking

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This is what an Osiria Rose looks like.

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That’s gonna be one hell of a sandwich!

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And as accidental as that porn may be, we have to end this here cause I gotta sleep sometime.  Have a great day my friends and may it be filled with love, happiness and laughter.

Cheers,

Impish Dragon

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4 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1921

  1. nogardcimsioc says:

    Police: Florida man worried about vampires intentionally burns down his home.

    https://www.wtxl.com/news/police-florida-man-worried-about-vampires-intentionally-burns-down-his/article_da37be2c-093c-11e9-b150-1b29f7dd112f.html

    Not anywheres near your league, Imp, but humorous nevertheless.

    Donnie

  2. Trish Gilbert says:

    Florida man:
    Half-Nude Florida Man Wearing Underwear Marked “Breathalyzer, Blow Here” Arrested for DUI
    He also had condoms strewn throughout the vehicle…and binoculars on the passenger’s seat.

  3. Pete says:

    I’d pretty much be willing to drive up there if you have a suit to fit me…..

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