Dragon Laffs #1900


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Good Morning Campers,453

One thousand, nine-hundred issues.  Holy crap.  That’s actually one heck of a milestone.  In just a few weeks it will be our 15 year anniversary … that’s like tin foil or something, I think.  Okay, so I just looked it up and it’s crystal.  Ooooohhhh!  Crystal!  I’d like some crystal!

Anyway, another busy, boring week.  Work, work, work, work, work.

Just got a donation from Carlos W!  Thanks Carlos!  I deeply appreciate it!  You have no idea.  It matters.  Thank you.

So, nothing to bitch about this morning, so let’s move on to the good stuff, shall we?

Let's Laugh

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To the lady with all the screaming kids at Wal-mart who’s wondering how the box of condoms got into her cart …

You’re welcome.

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Sasquatch – dude … looking good!

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Yes … yes we are.

The Bozo criminal for this morning is from Dallas, Texas. Bozo Vashon Rhymes stole an inner city passenger bus from the Greyhound terminal downtown. It seems our bozo knew how to start the bus and get it going but unfortunately he didn’t know how to release the parking brake. Consequently the back of the bus caught fire not too far down the road. Police arrested the bozo when he left his smoldering bus to go into a nearby Waffle House to call for help.

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To help in our UFO conversation …

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And speaking of which … I got a response from our dear camper, Leah D …

Leah D

So many things to reply to today. So here is chapter 1.
In the 60’s the Uintah Basin area of Utah was a hot bed of UFO activity.
My younger sister was graduating from some school thing, in the town 12 miles away from our farm home. It was a ‘school night’, so would be ending early, .My mother and sister left, I was in charge of the 5 children left at home.
They didn’t come home. Still not home. It’s so late, I’m so tired, I nod off. I don’t know what time it was they came, but when I ask what happened? Where in the world have they been? Mother spoke in a monotone saying too tired to talk about it, and went to bed.
When they had dropped from one bench to a lower bench, they saw the object hovering, and she started to feel weird, unable to drive, pulled over. It was very close, they could see detail. They described like windows on the side of it, could see something inside.
As far as they knew, they were there a few minutes, it left, and so did they, but they did see it off to the east side of them, following them, above the Duchesne River. They were so many hours late, but did not know it until they got home and saw the clock.
My friend and I also had an experience of missing time . . . but that would be another chapter.

Missing time is quite common.  I would be interested in hearing more.  Very intriguing.  Thanks for sharing.

Anyone else want to share any stories?

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Dragon Pix

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“Is there a reason why you aren’t using the front door?”

Okay, I’ve got a crap load of these that I’m going to give you guys all at the same time …

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That was like 20 Dad jokes in a row … and for that, I’m sorry.

To Err is Human

To blame it on someone else shows management potential

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Fantasy Pix

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What an excellent drawing!

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I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits.  The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves.

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I have put a lot of thought into it and I just don’t think being an adult is gonna work for me.

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motivational

Dancing

danger

Dare to slack

Dare

Daring

dark humor (2)

Darkness

Darth Tater

Date Stamp

Dating Sign Language #1

Dating

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Does no one else think it’s shameful we have to put up a sign to tell people to do this?

Exercise makes you look better naked.

So does wine.

Your choice.

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I often worry about the safety of my children.

—–

Especially the one that is rolling their eyes at me and talking back right now.

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Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He’s got two large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, “What’s in the bags?” “Si, Sand,” answered Juan. The guard says, “We’ll just see about that – get off the bike!”

The guard takes the bags and rips them apart, he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains Juan overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. The guard releases Juan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man’s shoulders, and lets him cross the border.

The next day, the same thing happens. The guard asks, “What have you got?” “Sand,” says Juan. The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to Juan, and Juan crosses the border on his bicycle.

This sequence of events is repeated every day for a year.

Finally, Juan doesn’t show up one day and the guard meets him in a Cantina in Mexico. “Hey, Buddy,” says the guard, “I know you are smuggling something. It’s driving me crazy. It’s all I think about… I can’t sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?” Juan sips his beer and says, “Bicycles…”

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Breathtaking

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This is what a bubble looks like mid-pop

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Weird Fact

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Boston has the worst drivers out of the nation’s 200 largest cities.  Kansas City has the best drivers.

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I think this is a good way to end this issue…issue number 1900 … the issue leading into Memorial Day weekend.  With a very poignant look at our Nation’s Capitol:

National Guard to Pull Out Of Capitol

 

WASHINGTON—The National Guard, deployed to secure the U.S. Capitol in the wake of the Jan. 6 attack by a pro-Trump mob, will end its mission there Wednesday, the Pentagon said.

The troops began arriving at the Capitol hours after Trump supporters breached the Capitol building while Congress was certifying the election of President Biden. The number of troops at one point peaked at 26,000, representing all 50 states, three territories and the District of Columbia. Their strength has been gradually reduced, and roughly 1,600 members remain at the complex.

The Pentagon hasn’t provided an updated cost estimate since March, when it said it had spent $521 million. Although the soldiers are leaving, officials warn that the hardened security measures around the Capitol would remain.

The Capitol Police twice requested the National Guard to extend its mission.

Mr. Biden offered “deepest thanks and enduring gratitude to the women and men of our National Guard” for the effort.

  BY NANCY A. YOUSSEF AND LINDSAY WISE  

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5/25/2021

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And that my dear and fellow campers is that for another day.  May you find peace, happiness, and laughter this day.

Cheers Impish

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4 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1900

  1. Jeanne says:

    They should put that fence around the Capital at the border, dammit!

  2. Sasquatch says:

    Why thanks, my good dragon. I never thought my new gig in motivational speaking would lead to me being a part of such a historic edition. (I refuse to call it issues. 1900 issues sounds too much like my ex) The honor is only slightly diminished by following a roach. Many happy returns. Here’s to 1900 more 🍻

  3. Stephanie says:

    Wow. If my calculations of the vintage of the dragonette most loved, we have been together 13 years. Most marriages,sadly, don’t last this long.
    Here’s to hoping we are able to spend another 13 years together.

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