LeprechaunLaff #65 for Friday 5/20


Leprechaun Laffs 4

Friday

 

I have to admit being under the weather and largely abed for most of it this week seems to have flown right by. Unfortunately, I also lost last weekend to being ill, and since I have lost most of this work week. I too like the Dragon shall probably be working the bulk of the weekend.or catching up on my Honey-do list. This tends to render me slightly less enthusiastic than my normal wont over the subject..

NOW LET’S LAUGH!

stir coffee cup

 

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Sleeping with Bob

The guys were all at a deer camp. No one wanted to room with Bob
because he snored so badly. They decided it wasn’t fair to make one of
them stay with him the whole time, so they voted to take turns.

The first guy slept with Bob and comes to breakfast the next morning
with his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot. They said, “Man,
what happened to you? He said, “Bob snored so loudly, I just sat up
and watched him all night.”

The next night it was a different guy’s turn. In the morning, same
thing, hair all standing up, eyes all bloodshot. They said, “Man,
what happened to you? You look awful! He said, ‘Man, that Bob shakes
the roof with his snoring. I watched him all night.”

The third night was Fred’s turn. Fred was a tanned, older cowboy, a
man’s man. The next morning he came to breakfast bright-eyed and
bushy-tailed. “Good morning!” he said. They couldn’t believe it. They
said, “Man, what happened?”

He said, “Well, we got ready for bed. I went and tucked Bob into
bed, patted him on the butt and kissed him good night. Bob sat up
and watched me all night.”

The old are a little wiser, when they can remember!

Isn’t that right K-Squared?

DL Larder Header

It’s been a while since we cooked or drank together and weekends are good for trying new recipes. Don’t discount this one just because its presented in graphics form!

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Marinate the chicken in 2 Tbsp of Extra Virgin Olive Oil, 1 Tbsp of Aged Balsamic Vinegar and 1 tsp ea of  minced garlic and chopped fresh rosemary. Substitute a nice fat piece of Portobello  or Crimini Mushroom for the Water chestnut and you have a nice Italian appetizer.

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Official ‘Summertime’ had just ended and in the early hours of that morning Lethal found his dyslexic mate Impish, sitting covering his Willy with black boot polish.

Lethal said, “You bloody idiot dragon – you’re supposed to TURN YOUR CLOCK BACK!”

image

Dear bra hooks,
Either cooperate or we start carrying scissors.
Sincerely, boys.

**************

Dear Americans,
Who told you we kiss like that?!
Sincerely, the French.

****************

Dear optimists,
If you look on the bright side for too long, you’ll go blind.
Sincerely, a pessimist.

***************************

Dear sit-ups,
Maybe if you didn’t start in the laying down position I could get myself to do a few…
Sincerely, lazy.

*************************

Dear Chinese people,
Do you get tattoos of American words?
Sincerely, I’ve always wondered…

*******************

Dear drag queens,
How do you manage to have better legs than me?
Sincerely, a jealous girl.

****************

Dear public restroom administrators,
Please either purchase A. Toilet paper dispensers with easy-to-turn spools, or B. Stronger toilet paper.
Sincerely, tired of tearing off one sheet at a time.

******************

Dear dentist,
I have to admit, I’m very impressed that you understood my story.
Sincerely, mmpghydood.

***********************

Dear people of the 1800’s,
Did you guys send dirty telegraphs and have letter sex?
Sincerely, curious.

******************

Dear you,
After reading this you will realize the the brain does not process the second “the.”
Sincerely, cool, eh?

*************

Dear person who invented salt,
What made you decide to combine two deadly poisons and put it on your food?
Sincerely, NaCl.

***************************

Dear platypus,
Not only are you half duck, half beaver, but you’re also one of the only mammals to produce venom.
Sincerely, jealous!

***********************

Dear @,
By the time they finally locate you on the keyboard, they could have typed at least three of me.
Sincerely, at.

*************************

Dear random person sitting next to me,
This is my favorite song, please stop singing…
Sincerely, those aren’t even the lyrics!

************************

Dear airlines,
So I have to wear a seatbelt while we are going two miles per hour while going to the runway, but not when we are 10,000 feet in the air while going several hundred miles per hour?
Sincerely, confused passenger.

**********************

Dear idiots who believe the world will end in 2012,
If the Mayans were so good at predicting things, they’d have seen the Spanish coming.
Sincerely, common sense.

Older - Funnier

getting old 19

getting old 20

getting old 21

coollogo_com-10333745_thumb2

Originally Posted as a comment in response to Impish’s Last Word in DL # 1200 May 17, 2011 at 12:37 . Since most of you never see the blog comments I am using it as todays Last word as well

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Disney Trademarks “Seal Team 6″
By Alex Weprin on May 13, 2011 4:25 PM

In a perfect example of a big media company looking to capitalize on current events, The Walt Disney Company has trademarked “Seal Team 6,” which also happens to be the name of the elite special forces team that killed Osama Bin Laden.

The trademark applications came on May 3rd, two days after the operation that killed Bin Laden… and two days after “Seal Team 6″ was included in thousands of news articles and TV programs focusing on the operation.

Disney’s trademark applications for “Seal Team 6″ cover clothing, footwear, headwear, toys, games and “entertainment and education services,” among other things.

Of course, for all we know Disney has been working on an animated feature about a team of anthropomorphic seals in search of adventure, but given the timing of the application that seems… unlikely.

http://www.mediabistro.com/fishbowlny/disney-trademarks-seal-team-6_b35689

HISS! BOO Disney! You didn’t create Seal Team Six, Cdr. Richard Marcinko did at the behest of the CNO at the time ADM Thomas B. Hayward

I for one refuse to buy or watch another Disney product or movie until the relinquish the rights to the trademark to DEVGRU who should own it. Why am I hacked off? Because in addition to epic moronic bureaucratic mindless drone stupidity at the US Patient and Trademark Office, this is unconscionably and unthinkably shameless. An act of pure simple greed.

Now Seal Team 6 or DEVGRU as they are more correctly known can’t even legally reproduce their unit patches, polo shirts or t-shirts which have been sanctioned special attire since its plank days w/o kissing Disney’s ass, facing Walt’s picture and asking may I please? What the (expletive deleted) is next? Hasbro going to trade mark Delta Force or Green Beret for use by G.I. Joe?

This as another example of Big business slapping people in the face in the name of scrambling to be in the best position for obtaining the almighty dollar pure and simple. This time Corporate America has been so callous as to do it openly and dare to slap our Newest National Heroes. I say its up to us to put an end to it!

BOYCOTT DISNEY IN ALL IT’S FORMS UNTIL THEY RELINQUISH THE TRADEMARK TO ITS RIGHTFUL OWNERS WITH A PUBLIC APOLOGY!

Let them know that greed IS NOT good just because Michael Douglas and they say it is!  Sony tried this during Desert Storm One with the phrase “Shock & Awe” and the public outcry made them cease and issue apologies. Let’s make Disney see the same light of reason in the only language they speak..declining profits.

About lethalleprechaun

I believe in being the kind of man who, when my feet touch the floor in the morn', causes the Devil to say "BUGGER ME! HIMSELF IS UP!" ======== I'm a White Married Heterosexual who fervently believes in the war(s) we are fighting, the Second Amendment which I plan on defending with my last breath and my last round of ammunition as well as Arizona's stringent law on Immigration and the need for the border wall. I'm a right of center Con-centrist with Tea Party & Republican sympathies who drives an SUV. I am a Life Time Member of the NRA, a Charter Member of the Patriots' Border Alliance and North American Hunters Association. If there is a season for it and I can shoot one I'll eat it and proudly wear its fur. I believe PETA exists solely to be a forum for Gays, Vegetarians, Hollywood snobbery to stupid to get into politics and Soybean Growers. The ACLU stopped protecting our civil liberties sometime after the 1960s and now serves its own bigoted headline grabbing agenda much in the same way as the Southern Poverty Law Center. I am ecstatic that WE the PEOPLE finally got mad enough to rise up and take back the Government from WE the ENTITLED and reverently wish the Liberals would just get over the loss and quit whining/protesting all the time. After all they're just reaping what they've sown. I am Pro-choice both when it comes to the issue of abortion AND school prayer. I believe in a government for the people, by the people which represents and does the people's will. Therefore I an Pro States rights and mandatory term limits but against special interest group campaign contributions and soft money. I think that sports teams who allow their players to sit or take a knee during the National Anthem should be boycotted until the message is received that this is not acceptable behavior for role models for children. I believe Congressional salaries should be voted on bi-annually by the people they represent and not by themselves. I think Congress should be subject to every law they pass on the populace including any regarding Social Security or Healthcare. Speaking of the Healthcare bill (or con job as I see it) I hope Trump will overturn it and set things back to normal. I oppose the building of an Mosque or ANY Islamic center at or within a 10 mile radius of Ground Zero in New York. I will fight those in favor of this until hell freezes over and then I will continue to fight it hand to hand on the ice. Further I think the ban on immigrants from certain nations known to harbor and promote terrorism is a justified measure, at least until we can come up with better methods of vetting and tracking those non citizens we allow in the country. We did not inflict this measure on them those who refuse to point out, denounce or fight radical religious terrorism brought this upon themselves.
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