Everyone finally clear of all those Thanksgiving Holiday Leftovers? Good. Personally I could do with another serving or two since its going to be almost an entire month before I get it again. While I’m not a huge fan of Bobby Flay, I do agree with his viewpoint that it’s a shame we only eat turkey twice a year. In fact when we returned home from our Thanksgiving Family Excursion of the Bayou and thru the King Ranch to Molly Grandma’s house Late Friday, one of the first tings I did was to remove our turkey from the freezer and put him in the sink to speed thaw over night.  The only problem with going someplace else for Thanksgiving is the lack of leftovers to tide you through the weekend!

Recovering from those bruises and/or pepper spraying you obtained in the Black Friday Free-For-Alls? Good, don’t worry TOO much about the credit card debt damage you did yourself, you have an entire 30 days now to figure our how to pay it or find a decent second  mortgage.

Now how about those carpel tunnel injuries suffered on Cyber Monday?  Receiving treatment for those too? Good. Got your braces or wrist supports in place? Even a full coffee cup can be painful and we would not want to having you committing caffeine abuse by dropping a full one, ESPECIALLY if it happens to be one from the DragonLaff Store!

 

Something side tracked me from ever finishing my 3 part coffee series when I was running it. Here is the last part then now.

The Truth About Coffee

The Claim: “Fair Trade Certified”

Much of the world’s coffee is grown in impoverished countries where farmers struggle to feed their families. The intent with fair trade certification is to lift these people out of destitution by encouraging coffee-bagging companies to pay them honest, living wages, which are determined by a German-based group known as Fairtrade Labeling Organizations International (FLO). FLO has 24 members operating worldwide, and in the U.S., the non-profit organization TransFair oversees the approval of FLO-sanctioned fair trade certification. That means that any bag of beans you buy, so long as it carries the iconic certification stamp, has been audited by TransFair to ensure it meets the same regulations as all fair trade certified products worldwide.
Now, here’s the fair-trade coffee controversy. Right now, to be eligible for fair trade certification, coffee importers must pay farmers no less than $1.35 per pound of conventional coffee and $1.51 per pound of organic. That would have been huge in 2001 when a worldwide oversupply of beans drove the average rate for a pound of coffee down to a paltry $.46. But with the demand for coffee now catching up with the supply, the average farmer today, fair trade or not, takes in a more reasonable $1.40 per pound, according to the International Coffee Organization. Some journalists have criticized FLO standards for being too low, and in some countries, farmers making fair trade wages still aren’t meeting the loosely enforced minimum wages set by their governments. So is it worth the extra cash? From an ethical standpoint, sure. The average coffee farmer today is doing far better than he or she used to, but there are still many less-fortunate farmers that could use the help. What’s more, most fair trade coffee is also organic, so the premium price you pay is also going to improve the environment and eliminate pesticides from your cup.

The Claim: “Organic”

Organic coffee, so long as it bears the official logo of the USDA, falls under the same governmental regulation as organic produce, which tells you that the coffee has been grown, transported, and roasted without the use of herbicides or pesticides. Unfortunately, no major studies have looked at how this affects your health, but there’s no question about organic’s impact on the environment. Chemical-reliant farming methods have been linked to fish deaths along the coasts of coffee-growing communities, and pesticides in water raise the concern for long-term health problems for locals. For organic beans you’ll likely pay a premium—generally about 25 percent more. Some of that trickles down to the farmer, but a wave of Latin coffee growers, for example, have been abandoning organic beans because they can’t recoup the extra expenses. In short, buy organic because you don’t like pesticides, but not necessarily because the farmer will see more of that extra cash you shell out.

The Claim: “Shade Grown”

A common practice in coffee farming is to clear off the native trees to make room for more coffee trees, destroying natural biodiversity and creating monocultures that rely on pesticides and fertilizers to produce beans. So in theory, “shade grown” is supposed to tell you that a diverse ecosystem still thrives on the farm. The problem is that there’s no organization governing the term, which leaves it open to abuse by any farmer whose farm has a few lonely trees scattered about. For environmentally meaningful certification, look for “Bird Friendly” and “Rainforest Alliance Certified” stamps.

The Claim: “Rainforest Alliance Certified”

Rainforest Alliance Certified must meet a strict set of requirements that promote sustainable resource management and the preservation of healthy ecosystems. That means farms must be partially covered by native trees, farmers must make living wages, and farming methods must have a minimal impact on the natural environment. The only designation more meaningful than Rainforest Alliance Certification is the Bird Friendly stamp. Typical coffee farms drive out birds by removing the trees, so Bird Friendly coffees, like Rainforest Alliance Certified beans, require a canopy of trees to remain over the farm. But Bird Friendly also goes one step further by requiring the farm to be certified organic, whereas the Rainforest Alliance allows the use of some chemicals.

 

On Becoming Illegal.

FORMS ARE GOING FAST- SIGN UP TODAY!
Becoming Illegal (Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator)

The Honorable Tom Harkin
731 Hart Senate Office Building
Phone (202) 224 3254
Washington DC , 20510

Dear Senator Harkin,

As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service , I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill’s provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.

Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I’m excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.

Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.

Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications , as well as ‘in-state’ tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.

Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver’s license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums .. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car. If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.

Your Loyal Constituent, (hoping to reach ‘illegal alien’ status rather than just a bonafide citizen of the USA)

Donald Ruppert
Burlington, IA
Get your Forms (NOW)!!
Call your Internal Revenue Service at 1-800-289-1040

 

Not a bad way of determining just how drunk you are or just how bad an idea picking up that bar floozy really is!

 

 

They sent my Tax Return back! AGAIN!!!

In response to the question: “List all dependents?”

I replied:

1) “12 million illegal immigrants;

2) “3 million crack heads;

3) “42 million unemployable people on food stamps,

4) “2 million people in over 243 prisons;

5) “Half of Mexico ; and

6) “535 fools in the U.S. House and Senate.”

Apparently, this was NOT an acceptable answer.

I guess SOMEONE has to pay G.E.’s fair share since they are not!

Copyright Explained

[if you have the patience to read it]

© The Department of Redundancy Department Copyright Department Copyright, 1999

When you write copy you have the right to copyright the copy you write. You can write good and copyright but copyright doesn’t mean copy good – it might not be right good copy, right?

Now, writers of religious services write rite, and thus have the right to copyright the rite they write.

Conservatives write right copy, and have the right to copyright the right copy they write.

A right wing cleric might write right rite, and have the right to copyright the right rite he has the right to write. His editor has the job of making the right rite copy right before the copyright would be right. Then it might be copy good copyright.

Should Thom Wright decide to write, then Wright might write right rite, which Wright has a right to copyright. Copying that rite would copy Wright’s right rite, and thus violate copyright, so Wright would have the legal right to right the wrong. Right?

Legals write writs, which is a right or not write writs right but all writs, copied or not, are writs that are copyright. Judges make writers write writs right.

Advertisers write copy which is copyright the copy writer’s company, not the right of the writer to copyright. But the copy written is copyrighted as written, right?

Wrongfully copying a right writ, a right rite or copy is not right.

 

 

The Leprechaun’s Kitchen Cupboard Larder and Bar are all closed this week for post holiday restocking. Catch us again next week when we start prepping for the onslaught of the Christmas holiday baking and beverage season. I suggest buying new sweat pants and stretch belts now to avoid the post holiday rush! 

SPEAKING of Christmas preparations, here’s a little something to make you life easier and scratch one more thing off your To-do list.

Free Christmas music

It’s time for Christmas again, which means it’s time for Christmas music. You’ll probably hear the same old songs again and again. In fact, you’ve probably already heard all the usual fare in stores and on the radio.

Break that cycle! Download some great new songs – and new covers of some old ones – at this free song website.

Feels Like Christmas offers up tracks from independent artists for your holiday listening pleasure. All are available as MP3 downloads and all are free.

The offerings range from traditional instrumentals to contemporary vocals. You’re sure to find a new favorite among them all!

Cost: Free

Link: feelslikechristmas.com

System: Windows XP, Vista, 7; OS X

Beats the heck out of relying on that scratchy old 45 of the Barking Dogs  doing Jingle Bells again this year!

 

Amazing Amish Christmas Lights

These are amazing!

See? Told you! Totally amazing! 

Political Cartoons of the Week: Rick Perry’s “Oops moment” is not over

Every Sunday, Texas on the Potomac presents some of the best political cartoons from the award-winning artists of Hearst Newspapers. Today, we feature work by Nick Anderson of the Houston Chronicle, Andy Coughlan of the Beaumont Enterprise and John Branch of the San Antonio Express-News.

 

Look Who Likes Music!

This is a great performance and take note that not one in the audience left during the performance!

 

http://www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/lXKDu6cdXLI?rel=0

In the course of my travels for Thanksgiving I ran across a few traveling servicemen just trying to get home for the holidays. I took the opportunity to thank them at every turn and managed to buy the coffee and snaks for one car load, then guide them back onto the the highway and show them an alternate route to their destination which shaved about an hour off their travel time.

Believe it or not the reaction most often encountered when they are thanked is sheepish embarrassment, even for small gestures like an entire line of people waiting to pay for their snaks and beverages side stepping so they could get to the front of the line at the check out so that I could pay for their food and drinks.

This got me thinking and made me remember The Gratitude Campaign and their simple sign for expressing gratitude to those who serve when we come across them publically this holiday season.

The Gratitude Campaign was started back on 2007 as an easy, simple but effective way to say thank you to our troops in places like airports, bus and train stations malls and the like without making it awkward for either side. All it takes is learning a simple easy to remember fast to execute gesture easily recognizable as a sign of gratitude.
Here is the link to their website: http://www.gratitudecampaign.org/index.php?c=pages&m=about_the_sign and here is a Youtube of the sign in action:

 

Signs That You’re Not Mensa Material

– You couldn’t figure out how to break the seal on your standardized intelligence test, so you had to give up.

– You wonder how the deer know to cross at the deer crossing signs.

– You are confused by the plot twists of a Bugs Bunny cartoon.

– You once tried to solve a Rubik’s cube and had to be institutionalized for over a year.

– You had trouble getting in even before they saw the decimal point in your IQ.

– You are still struggling to finish “Shoe Laces for Dummies.”

– Your family had a celebration when you scored a “perfect 10” points on your SAT.

– You don’t watch PBS because there are no Budweiser or Taco Bell commercials.

– Homer Simpson is your idol.

– That “which comes first” thing about chicken and eggs just makes you hungry.

If you hit all those sign on the money (like someone here at DragonLaffs did) chances are better than excellent you are a Dragon.

  That warning pretty much extends to the rest of the entire issue too. So if your easily offended, prone to the vapors, or think the world should exist as a born again moral minority Christian religious cult, time to employ that scroll wheel until you hit todays Parting Shot.

Forewarned is forsworn!

  

Sex hog heaven for bacon lovers is finally here

If you’ve heard of BaconSalt you may be familiar with J&D’s, who also make Baconnaise and BaconPop. Now they’ve gone way outside the kitchen and are introducing baconlube.

Says Jezebel.com:

Now they’ve created a limited quantity of bacon-flavored lube and massage oils for troubled individuals who want their lover to taste more like cured pork.

According to baconlube.com:

Before you start giving meat-flavored massages, we have one small admission to make – baconlube began as an elaborate April Fool’s prank and was never intended to be a real product. But when the joke ended, the emails kept coming. People harassed us via email, in public and in highly inappropriate ways (thanks for that). The waiting list grew to over 3,000 people. Expectations were built.

So who’s responsible for this highly anticipated creation actually coming to life? You are, that’s who. You and an intern named Martin actually, who sacrificed and offended his taste buds in the name of science on sample after failed sample before this really did taste like bacon.

We’ll make no judgments about why you want this or what you want to do with it, but baconlube is here and it’s real for a limited time. Keep It Sizzlin’.

Brings a whole new sick twisted level of meaning to the innuendo (that’s Italian for suppository folks) “making bacon”. Wonder if I can get Impish to eat his Vegan Virgins now if I coat them with this stuff?

 

McDonald’s customer would rather eat burger than deal with her burning car.

http://www.wdam.com/video?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=6457610

A Mississippi woman’s burger run ended with her car destroyed by a fire and her arrest, according to a video posted by Hattiesburg, Miss. TV station WDAM.

Drive-thru workers at a McDonald’s let a customer know that her car was on fire as she pulled up to the window. The woman parked the car and went into the restaurant to wait for her order and eat the food rather then dealing with the blaze, WDAM said.

After McDonald’s called 911 and the fire department extinguished the fire (which completely burnt her vehicle), she fought with the cops who just needed her information for the report.
From the story:

When an officer attempted to escort the driver back to the presence of firefighters for questioning, she allegedly resisted and punched him. She was then arrested on four misdemeanor counts including public profanity, resisting arrest, assaulting a police officer and disorderly conduct.

I can hear them at the Drive-thru now… ”You want fries with that car fire? Can I super size those flames for you? Are you sure? It’s only like 35 cents more to get it fully involved!”

 

Fake doctor in Florida arrested for dangerous butt injections

http://media.nbcmiami.com/designvideo/embeddedPlayer.swf

A woman was arrested by Florida police for using a mixture of superglue, cement, mineral oil and other chemicals in illegal, butt-enhancing cosmetic procedures, according to reports by NBC Miami and the Miami Herald.

Oneal Ron Morris, a 30 year-old transgendered woman, faces charges of practicing medicine without a license for injecting a woman who later became hospitalized with serious complications to the procedure, including a staph infection.

Morris also appears to have performed the injections on herself, judging by the unusual proportions in her booking photos. Police are asking other victims to come forward.

The Miami Herald wrote:

Investigators suspect (Morris) is part of an underground network of scam artists who have been offering “pumping parties” and home buttocks augmentations across South Florida for years.

In some cases, the end result has been deadly.

Vera Lawrence of Carol City died in March 2001 after too much silicone was injected in her buttocks during a “pumping party” at a Miramar home. The hosts of the party were not licensed physicians, and eventually were charged with Lawrence’s death.

First let me say I STRONGLY suspect that prior to giving herself the el cheapo butt enhancement package Morris was the recipient of a home party el cheapo IQ enhancement of the same dubious quality and  degree of unexpected (at least by her) side effects.

Secondly, Impish dude let me just say publically that I am SO VERY SORRY! All this time I thought you were an very expanding eating machine and therefore fair game for poking fun at. I had NO IDEA you were in fact a medical scam victim!

 

 

 

Won’t you please endow them generously, so the young girls might be generously endowed?

 

The Psychiatrist & The Proctologist.

Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time and decided that,
In spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together
to share office space and personnel.
Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist and Dr. Jones was the proctologist.They put
up a sign reading:
“Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors”.
The town council was livid and insisted they change it.
So, the docs changed it to read: “Schizoids and Hemorrhoids”.This was also
not acceptable, so they again changed the sign.
“Catatonics and High Colonics” – No go.
Next, they tried “Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives” – thumbs down again.
Then came “Minds and Behinds” – still no good.
Another attempt resulted in “Lost Souls and Butt Holes” – unacceptable again!
So they tried “Analysis and Anal Cysts” – not a chance.
“Nuts and Butts” – no way.
“Freaks and Cheeks” – still no good.
“Loons and Moons” – forget it.
Almost at their wit’s end, the docs finally came up with:
“Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones – Specializing in Odds and Ends”.
Everyone loved it.

 

 

My Parting Shot last week apparently hit home with some of you. I received a private message from Impish congratulating me for the issue, there is a posted comment about my Parting Shot and I received several “atta boy Lethal” e-mails about it.

I also have several liberals who will privately attempt to take me to task for things I say because they know too well the kind of “public education” they will get if they post their not based in logic or facts fantasy spun bullshit in the comments. I’d like to thank them for sending me their thoughts as I was running short of toilet paper. Those comments basically called me a homegrown terrorist gun nut who was preaching sedition and defiance of the government.

Unfortunately they have learned to include a phrase in the e-mails which precludes me from posting the contents or names of those losers here for all to see. See Democrats and Liberals like to do their hatchet jobs from the shadows because they KNOW they cannot hold up under the light scrutiny and pressure of logical intelligent discourse and debate.

The last comment I got was extremely interesting however. It was from a “throw away” e-mail service. You get a one time e-mail address there for “allegedly” sending untraceable messages (nothing is untraceable on the internet if someone knows enough, has enough time and clout). The body of the e-mail consisted of only a link and the comment:

You are not alone. Welcome to the company of like minded individuals!.

That link lead me here:

Welcome to Oath Keepers

Oath Keepers is a non-partisan association of currently serving military, reserves, National Guard, veterans, Peace Officers, and Fire Fighters who will fulfill the Oath we swore, with the support of like minded citizens who take an Oath to stand with us, to support and defend the Constitution against all enemies, foreign and domestic, so help us God. Our Oath is to the Constitution

Our motto is “Not on our watch!”

http://oathkeepers.org/oath/

Orders We Will Not Obey

“The time is now near at hand which must probably determine, whether Americans are to be, Freemen, or Slaves; whether they are to have any property they can call their own; whether their Houses, and Farms, are to be pillaged and destroyed, and they consigned to a State of Wretchedness from which no human efforts will probably deliver them. The fate of unborn Millions will now depend, under God, on the Courage and Conduct of this army” — Gen. George Washington, to his troops before the battle of Long Island

Such a time is near at hand again. The fate of unborn millions will now depend, under God, on the Courage and Conduct of this Army — and this Marine Corps, This Air Force, This Navy and the National Guard and police units of these sovereign states.

Oath Keepers is a non-partisan association of currently serving military, reserves, National Guard, peace officers, fire-fighters, and veterans who swore an oath to support and defend the Constitution against all enemies, foreign and domestic … and meant it. We won’t “just follow orders.”

Below is our declaration of orders we will NOT obey because we will consider them unconstitutional (and thus unlawful) and immoral violations of the natural rights of the people. Such orders would be acts of war against the American people by their own government, and thus acts of treason. We will not make war against our own people. We will not commit treason. We will defend the Republic.

Declaration of Orders We Will NOT Obey

Recognizing that we each swore an oath to support and defend the Constitution against all enemies, foreign and domestic, and affirming that we are guardians of the Republic, of the principles in our Declaration of Independence, and of the rights of our people, we affirm and declare the following:

1. We will NOT obey any order to disarm the American people.

The attempt to disarm the people on April 19, 1775 was the spark of open conflict in the American Revolution. That vile attempt was an act of war, and the American people fought back in justified, righteous self-defense of their natural rights. Any such order today would also be an act of war against the American people, and thus an act of treason. We will not make war on our own people, and we will not commit treason by obeying any such treasonous order.

Nor will we assist, or support any such attempt to disarm the people by other government entities, either state or federal.

In addition, we affirm that the purpose of the Second Amendment is to preserve the military power of the people so that they will, in the last resort, have effective final recourse to arms and to the God of Hosts in the face of tyranny. Accordingly, we oppose any and all further infringements on the right of the people to keep and bear arms. In particular we oppose a renewal of the misnamed “assault-weapons” ban or the enactment of H.R. 45 (which would register and track gun owners like convicted pedophiles).

2. We will NOT obey any order to conduct warrantless searches of the American people, their homes, vehicles, papers, or effects — such as warrantless house-to house searches for weapons or persons.

One of the causes of the American Revolution was the use of “writs of assistance,” which were essentially warrantless searches because there was no requirement of a showing of probable cause to a judge, and the first fiery embers of American resistance were born in opposition to those infamous writs. The Founders considered all warrantless searches to be unreasonable and egregious. It was to prevent a repeat of such violations of the right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects that the Fourth Amendment was written.

We expect that sweeping warrantless searches of homes and vehicles, under some pretext, will be the means used to attempt to disarm the people.

3. We will NOT obey any order to detain American citizens as “unlawful enemy combatants” or to subject them to trial by military tribunal.

One of the causes of the American Revolution was the denial of the right to jury trial, the use of admiralty courts (military tribunals) instead, and the application of the laws of war to the colonists. After that experience, and being well aware of the infamous Star Chamber in English history, the Founders ensured that the international laws of war would apply only to foreign enemies, not to the American people. Thus, the Article III Treason Clause establishes the only constitutional form of trial for an American, not serving in the military, who is accused of making war on his own nation. Such a trial for treason must be before a civilian jury, not a tribunal.

The international laws of war do not trump our Bill of Rights. We reject as illegitimate any such claimed power, as did the Supreme Court in Ex Parte Milligan (1865). Any attempt to apply the laws of war to American civilians, under any pretext, such as against domestic “militia” groups the government brands “domestic terrorists,” is an act of war and an act of treason.

4. We will NOT obey orders to impose martial law or a “state of emergency” on a state, or to enter with force into a state, without the express consent and invitation of that state’s legislature and governor.

One of the causes of the American Revolution was the attempt “to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power” by disbanding the Massachusetts legislature and appointing General Gage as “military governor.” The attempt to disarm the people of Massachusetts during that martial law sparked our Revolution. Accordingly, the power to impose martial law – the absolute rule over the people by a military officer with his will alone being law – is nowhere enumerated in our Constitution.

Further, it is the militia of a state and of the several states that the Constitution contemplates being used in any context, during any emergency within a state, not the standing army.

The imposition of martial law by the national government over a state and its people, treating them as an occupied enemy nation, is an act of war. Such an attempted suspension of the Constitution and Bill of Rights voids the compact with the states and with the people.

5. We will NOT obey orders to invade and subjugate any state that asserts its sovereignty and declares the national government to be in violation of the compact by which that state entered the Union.

In response to the obscene growth of federal power and to the absurdly totalitarian claimed powers of the Executive, upwards of 20 states are considering, have considered, or have passed courageous resolutions affirming states rights and sovereignty.

Those resolutions follow in the honored and revered footsteps of Jefferson and Madison in their Kentucky and Virginia Resolutions, and likewise seek to enforce the Constitution by affirming the very same principles of our Declaration, Constitution, and Bill of Rights that we Oath Keepers recognize and affirm.

Chief among those principles is that ours is a dual sovereignty system, with the people of each state retaining all powers not granted to the national government they created, and thus the people of each state reserved to themselves the right to judge when the national government they created has voided the compact between the states by asserting powers never granted.

Upon the declaration by a state that such a breach has occurred, we will not obey orders to force that state to submit to the national government.

6. We will NOT obey any order to blockade American cities, thus turning them into giant concentration camps.

One of the causes of the American Revolution was the blockade of Boston, and the occupying of that city by the British military, under martial law. Once hostilities began, the people of Boston were tricked into turning in their arms in exchange for safe passage, but were then forbidden to leave. That confinement of the residents of an entire city was an act of war.

Such tactics were repeated by the Nazis in the Warsaw Ghetto, and by the Imperial Japanese in Nanking, turning entire cities into death camps. Any such order to disarm and confine the people of an American city will be an act of war and thus an act of treason.

7. We will NOT obey any order to force American citizens into any form of detention camps under any pretext.

Mass, forced internment into concentration camps was a hallmark of every fascist and communist dictatorship in the 20th Century. Such internment was unfortunately even used against American citizens of Japanese descent during World War II. Whenever a government interns its own people, it treats them like an occupied enemy population. Oppressive governments often use the internment of women and children to break the will of the men fighting for their liberty – as was done to the Boers, to the Jewish resisters in the Warsaw Ghetto, and to the Chechens, for example.

Such a vile order to forcibly intern Americans without charges or trial would be an act of war against the American people, and thus an act of treason, regardless of the pretext used. We will not commit treason, nor will we facilitate or support it.”NOT on Our Watch!”

8. We will NOT obey orders to assist or support the use of any foreign troops on U.S. soil against the American people to “keep the peace” or to “maintain control” during any emergency, or under any other pretext. We will consider such use of foreign troops against our people to be an invasion and an act of war.

During the American Revolution, the British government enlisted the aid of Hessian mercenaries in an attempt to subjugate the rebellious American people. Throughout history, repressive regimes have enlisted the aid of foreign troops and mercenaries who have no bonds with the people.

Accordingly, as the militia of the several states are the only military force contemplated by the Constitution, in Article I, Section 8, for domestic keeping of the peace, and as the use of even our own standing army for such purposes is without such constitutional support, the use of foreign troops and mercenaries against the people is wildly unconstitutional, egregious, and an act of war.

We will oppose such troops as enemies of the people and we will treat all who request, invite, and aid those foreign troops as the traitors they are.

9. We will NOT obey any orders to confiscate the property of the American people, including food and other essential supplies, under any emergency pretext whatsoever.

One of the causes of the American Revolution was the seizure and forfeiture of American ships, goods, and supplies, along with the seizure of American timber for the Royal Navy, all in violation of the people’s natural right to their property and to the fruits of their labor. The final spark of the Revolution was the attempt by the government to seize powder and cannon stores at Concord.

Deprivation of food has long been a weapon of war and oppression, with millions intentionally starved to death by fascist and communist governments in the 20th Century alone.

Accordingly, we will not obey or facilitate orders to confiscate food and other essential supplies from the people, and we will consider all those who issue or carry out such orders to be the enemies of the people.

10. We will NOT obey any orders which infringe on the right of the people to free speech, to peaceably assemble, and to petition their government for a redress of grievances.

There would have been no American Revolution without fiery speakers and writers such as James Otis, Patrick Henry, Thomas Paine, and Sam Adams “setting brushfires of freedom in the minds of men.”

Consider sending a clear message by joining won’t you? Some of you have said that your situation or finances preclude you buying a gun. This is the next best defense I can see so far. Just because you already “keep and Bear arms” doesn’t mean you shouldn’t bother joining either.

Good Morning Campers…Wow, what a jam packed issue we have for you today.  From Reptile Dysfunction to really old Oklahoma jokes and jut about everything you can imagine in between.

I hope everyone had a marvelous Thanksgiving the other day… at Chambre de Dragon, we had a marvelous day with many of the traditional Thanksgiving Day experiences.  The chocolate covered virgins were especially nice.  And the Village Pillage Festival went off without a hitch! 

and of course, watching the great Green Bay Packers go to 11-0 was one of the highlights of the day!

So then….without further ado, let’s move on and get to the good stuff!

http://sports.yahoo.com/nascar/blog/from_the_marbles/post/Behold-the-greatest-Hot-Wheels-track-in-human-hi?urn=nascar-wp4642 
This, friends, is some fun: a 2,000-foot-long Hot Wheels track that goes up and down multiple stories, through 14 rooms of a house, outdoors and back in again, and even over a hot tub. You know, just like NASCAR used to do it. (For perspective’s sake, if we use the typical 1/64 ratio of Hot Wheels cars, this is the equivalent of a 24-mile-long race track.)

This is a charitable effort designed to raise money for “Hope for Gabe,” a charitable foundation to help fight Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. More details at this link and in the video itself.

Great track, great cause, great video. Sure hope those kids clean up that mess they’ve made.

Yes, I know it’s been done a hundred times already…
And yes, I know it’s an old joke…

How  do YOU pronounce   Oklahoma ?

Do  you think it’s  correct?

There  is a right way and a wrong way to  pronounce    Oklahoma ….

If you  say  OK…LAHOMA

You’re WRONG

The  proper way  is:

OKLA …….HOMA
There’s a gap

between the  ‘a’ and the  ‘h’.

I can  prove  it…

There!  You learned something today!

I do love these educational emails.

…but I just can’t help myself… (for pretty obvious reasons!)

This one is so bad, I can’t possibly make the warning big enough.  Looks like Tom is giving the groaner record a run for it’s money:

She picks them, cooks some for Sunday lunch in a cheese sauce, and they taste wonderful.

 

After eating them for a week she notices two things.

 

Firstly, her lips are full and glossy, unchapped, uncracked, and require absolutely no lip gloss to make them look full and pouty.

 

Secondly, she has really awful bad breath, and even her cat won’t come near her.

 

Pleased with her lips, however, and spotting a money-making idea, she contacts a big cosmetics company and explains about the lip-enhancing qualities of her cauliflower crop.

 

After a month of testing, the company buys the entire crop of cauliflowers for a phenomenal amount and requests that Mary grow some more as soon as possible.

 

The company proceeds to make lipstick out of them but experiences problems in the the final product manufacture. The lipstick does not gel correctly into a solid stick and ends up crumbling upon application. Quality controllers also find that, even as a lipstick, the bad breath remains and have to put it down as an unfortunate side effect.

 

As they are nearing their production deadline and adverts for this new wonder lip Enhancer have hit the streets, the cosmetics company has no choice but to produce the packaging with the following caution.

 

Poppins’ Pop-up Lip Enhancer:
SUPER CAULI, FRAGILE LIPSTICK – EXPECT-HALITOSIS

This is just plain bloody awful!

This one will really make you think about keeping your lead foot out of the pedal!

And another hat is thrown into the ring!
Thanks to Lucille for this groaner.  (Hi ya Lucille…long time…)

It’s true!  I read it on the internet, so it must be true!

Today’s Last Word…comes to us via my dad.  Thanks Dad!  Hey, you’re becoming a major contributor to this ezine!  But don’t think that means you’re getting your name on the masthead!

From the Staff Of
DragonLaffs.Com

 

And that should JUST about cover my feelings on witty opening comments today.

After enduring a surprise annual apartment inspection by the property management company last week, having 48 hours to put the place back into white glove inspection order for a surprise weekend Mother In Law visit and accomplishing all the pre Thanksgiving required things plus it being the eve of a holiday travel trip for us I’m not really uber happy or witty.

To make it even worse I will be leaving at 05:30 and driving about four and a half hours so I will not even get to see the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade!

 

The reason for choosing this coffee graphic will become apparent when you get to my Last Word Rant

 

Understanding  “Relativity” – The Truth is in the Physics

I’d NEVER presume to debate Einstein on The Theory of Relativity, the Laws of Physics or the Applied Applications of the Laws of Physics.

 

Down here in Texas they have “deer camps” where you go and spend the weekend “supposedly” hunting deer (if you check the time spent hunting versus time spent doing everything else BUT hunting I think hunting comes in at maybe 5 to 10% of the time spent). Many of these ‘deer camps” and “deer blinds” or “deer stands” are nicer than some of the Bachelor Officers Quarters I have lived in. This next cartoon sort of reminded me of that.

You think I’m kidding? Here’s a few pictures no joke

 

Remember now this is someplace you go roughly 6 week a year to HUNT deer

Finally in the right spots in Texas and the right weather conditions it can get pretty darn chilly just sitting still waiting for a deer to wander by and get (usually accidentally in my experience down here) shot. These folks have come up with  a solution for staying warm while you wait for that deer to oblige you.

You’ll note the strict attention to the laws of hunting, he IS wearing florescent safety orange while engaged in the act of hunting!

Blame this on Beamrider! Apparently he’s misplaced his tinfoil beanie again.

Driving home from her office one summer day, a woman noted that there were four places within two blocks of her home where she could stop and buy a five-cent glass of iced tea.
Each little stand had two or three youngsters behind it, all eager to serve any customer who came their way.
During the next two weeks, the woman managed to stop at each of the stands to encourage the entrepreneurs.
In each case the tea was very good.
Small talk revealed that all the youngsters were selling tea made by their mothers, who used tea leaves and real lemons in making the tea.
One day the woman discovered that only one stand was operating.
Behind it was the new kid on the block.
She stopped and ordered a glass of tea. It was served in a paper cup and it cost 10 cents.
Some conversation brought out the fact that the young man’s father was a lawyer who specialized in mergers, which had inspired the boy to buy out his competitors, bartering with baseball cards, marbles, and stuff he had laying around in his garage.
His first act, he explained, was to raise the price of the iced tea, and cut costs.
He was using a powdered tea mix from the supermarket, he said, which eliminated buying real lemons as well as the bother of squeezing them or putting them in the juicer. He didn’t have to brew real tea either, he pointed out. He had plans to cut costs further, he said, and with his competitors out of the market, he expected sales to grow.
Intrigued, the woman made a half dozen more stops at the stand and became aware that the tea was getting weaker and weaker.
One day the young man confessed that sales were dropping and he attributed this to the fact that he was using less and less of the powdered-tea mix.
Then one day he went out of business, as attempts to turn things around failed.
The moral of this story is: Honest tea is the best policy

 

 

It gets to be this time of year, the holiday season and that’s when I truly start missing being in New England. The foods during the holidays for my money were far superior there to Texas. A mean spirited friend in Montana who shares my opinion of this time of year in revenge for my calling him excitedly to share the news I had finally after 5 years of looking hard scored some broccoli rabe which he cannot obtain up there sent be the following (drool bibs should be deployed now):

An Italian Thanksgiving :

ITALIAN THANKSGIVING

When I was a kid growing up, Thanksgiving was a day to reflect on what we had to be thankful for and to see my family together.

After this peaceful moment, of no one screaming at each other, it was time to eat! ANDIAMO!

Now Italians do it all little bit different than the rest, but what else is new.

First we start with:

ANTIPASTO

then LASAGNA or

MANICOTTI (depending on what you had last year) with

MEAT IN THE GRAVY

then SOUP

Now we get to the Meal:

TURKEY

STUFFING

ROASTED POTATOES

BROCCOLI RABE

and/or ESCAROLE

ROASTED RED PEPPERS

SAUTEED MUSHROOMS

SAUTEED STRINGBEANS (picked from the vine in the backyard garden)

THE BREAD (that nonna made)

and GOD FORBID YOU FORGET THE SALAD!!

(picked from the backyard garden with homemade wine vinegar)

To wash it all down, we had:

HOMEMADE WINE

and 7 UP (IN THE GLASS BOTTLE)

Then after the men had a 2-hour nap and the woman cleaned all the dishes, we had:

CHESTNUTS

MIXED NUTS

FRESH FRUIT

DRIED FIGS

and FINOCCHIO

Then we started the dessert:

ITALIAN COOKIES

SFOGLIATELLE

CANNOLIS’

and ITALIAN PASTRY (just in case we missed something)

During this feast we enjoyed a nice EXPRESSO with

MARIE BRIZARD ANISETTE or

ROMANA SAMBUCA

Then after that we needed a little something for DIGESTIVO

We went straight for the BRIOSCHI!!!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL MY PAISANI!

 

 

A LITTLE BOY IN CHURCH FOR THE FIRST TIME WATCHED AS THE USHERS PASSED AROUND THE OFFERING PLATES.

WHEN THEY CAME NEAR HIS PEW, THE BOY SAID LOUDLY, “DON’T PAY FOR ME DADDY I’M UNDER FIVE.”

 

A Hallmark Red Neck Trailer Trash Thanksgiving Moment

 

 

THIS IS A RIOT!!!!! TURN ON THE SOUND!

http://www.newsday.com/polopoly_fs/1..235372.1243574086!menu/standard/file/ny-walt-baby-boomers.swf

 

Campbell’s Kitchen, at least from my stomach’s view point is the reigning expert when it comes to making something out of nothing, or making something an extra special something while doing it very fast, extremely easy and at a reasonable price. That’s pretty dang hard to compete with, so I have not even tried (ok so I DID note a few tweaks, observations and suggestions, what did you expect? ).

All these recipes came from the Campbell’s Kitchen Newsletter or website follow on links. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m off to make myself a batch of Tempura Fried Turkey Livers to dip in Chinese Hot Mustard and enjoy!

French Onion Turkey Casserole

From: Campbell’s Kitchen

Prep: 20 minutes
Bake: 45 minutes
Stand: 15 minutes

Serves: 8

Use up your leftovers to make this savory “bread pudding”…it’s so simple to make, and so tasty. You’ll enjoy making it for brunches, light dinners, and anytime you’re in the mood for really good food.

Ingredients:

Vegetable cooking spray

6 eggs

1 can (10 1/2 ounces) Campbell’s® Condensed French Onion Soup

2 cups milk

1 cup shredded Swiss cheese (about 4 ounces)

2 tablespoons chopped fresh thyme leaves or 2 teaspoons dried thyme leaves, crushed

9 slices Pepperidge Farm® Farmhouse™ Hearty White Bread, cut into cubes

2 cups shredded or cubed cooked turkey

Directions:

Heat the oven to 350°F. Spray a 2-quart shallow baking dish with the cooking spray.

Beat the eggs, soup, milk, 1/2 cup cheese and 1 tablespoon thyme in a large bowl with a fork or whisk. Add the bread cubes and turkey. Stir and press the bread cubes into the milk mixture to coat.

Pour the bread mixture into the baking dish. Sprinkle with the remaining cheese and thyme. Let stand for 15 minutes.

Bake for 45 minutes or until a knife inserted in the center comes out clean.

Recipe Tips:

Easy Substitution: You can substitute your favorite shredded cheese for the Swiss cheese.

Nutrition Information

Nutritional Values per Serving

Using Pepperidge Farm Farmhouse Soft Hearty White Bread: : Calories 354, Total Fat 13g, Saturated Fat 6g, Cholesterol 205mg, Sodium 606mg, Total Carbohydrate 32g, Dietary Fiber 2g, Protein 26g, Vitamin A 9%DV, Vitamin C 2%DV, Calcium 27%DV, Iron 15%DV

 

Easy Turkey Pot Pie

From: Campbell’s Kitchen

Prep: 10 minutes
Bake: 30 minutes

Serves: 4

Roast poultry and vegetables are paired in a creamy sauce and topped with a golden biscuit crust.

Ingredients:

1 can (10 3/4 ounces) Campbell’s® Condensed Cream of Chicken Soup (Regular or 98% Fat Free)

1 package (about 9 ounces) frozen mixed vegetables, thawed

1 cup cubed cooked turkey or chicken

1/2 cup milk

1 egg

1 cup all-purpose baking mix

Directions:

Heat the oven to 400°F.

Stir the soup, vegetables and turkey in a 9-inch pie plate.

Stir the milk, egg and baking mix in a small bowl. Spread the batter over the turkey mixture.

Bake for 30 minutes or until the topping is golden brown.

Recipe Tips:

Tip: Substitute Campbell’s® Condensed Cream of Chicken with Herbs Soup for the Cream of Chicken.

Nutrition Information

Nutritional Values per Serving

Using Campbell’s Cream of Chicken Soup: : Calories 323, Total Fat 13g, Saturated Fat 4g, Cholesterol 88mg, Sodium 965mg, Total Carbohydrate 34g, Dietary Fiber 4g, Protein 19g, Vitamin A 71%DV, Vitamin C 11%DV, Calcium 10%DV, Iron 14%DV

 

Turkey Noodle Casserole

From: Campbell’s Kitchen

Prep: 20 minutes
Bake: 35 minutes

Serves: 8

This comforting casserole is similar to classic tuna noodle casserole, but it uses turkey instead. It’s a flavorful way to use leftovers, or to satisfy those who don’t like tuna.

Ingredients:

2 cans (10 3/4 ounces each) Campbell’s® Condensed Cream of Mushroom Soup (Regular or 98% Fat Free)

(The Golden Mushroom or Cream of Chicken work equally well with turkey. Better yet substitute a can full of left over gravy for one can of soup! You may need to reduce the milk depending on how thick you make your gravy)

1 cup milk

2 cups frozen peas

2 cups cubed cooked turkey

1/2 of a 12-ounce package medium egg noodles (about 4 cups), cooked and drained

2 tablespoons plain dry bread crumbs

1 tablespoon butter, melted

Directions:

Stir the soup, milk, peas, turkey and noodles in a 3-quart casserole. Stir the bread crumbs and butter in a small bowl.

Bake the turkey mixture at 400°F. for 30 minutes or until hot and bubbling. Stir the turkey mixture. Sprinkle with the bread crumb mixture.

Bake for 5 minutes or until the bread crumb mixture is golden brown.

Nutritional Values per Serving

Using Campbell’s Cream of Mushroom Soup: : Calories 265, Total Fat 9g, Saturated Fat 3g, Cholesterol 54mg, Sodium 640mg, Total Carbohydrate 28g, Dietary Fiber 4g, Protein 17g, Vitamin A 17%DV, Vitamin C 11%DV, Calcium 7%DV, Iron 9%DV
Nutritional Values per Serving

Using Campbell’s 98% Fat Free Cream of Mushroom Soup: : Calories 240, Total Fat 6g, Saturated Fat 2g, Cholesterol 53mg, Sodium 401mg, Total Carbohydrate 28g, Dietary Fiber 3g, Protein 17g, Vitamin A 17%DV, Vitamin C 11%DV, Calcium 8%DV, Iron 9%DV

 

Country Turkey Casserole

From: Campbell’s Kitchen

Prep: 10 minutes
Bake: 25 minutes

Serves: 5

Your favorite mixed vegetables join turkey and stuffing in a creamy sauce in this no-hassle casserole.

Ingredients:

1 can (10 3/4 ounces) Campbell’s® Condensed Cream of Celery Soup (Regular or 98% Fat Free)

(Cream of Celery Soup is just plain NASTY, use Cream of Mushroom or Cream of Chicken instead.)

1 can (10 3/4 ounces) Campbell’s® Condensed Cream of Potato Soup

1 cup milk

1/4 teaspoon dried thyme leaves, crushed

1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper

4 cups cooked cut-up vegetables *

2 cups cubed cooked turkey or chicken

4 cups prepared Pepperidge Farm® Herb Seasoned Stuffing

Directions:

Stir the soups, milk, thyme, black pepper, vegetables and turkey in a 3-quart shallow baking dish. Spoon the stuffing over the turkey mixture.

Bake at 400°F. for 25 minutes or until the stuffing is golden brown.

Recipe Tips:

Add Ins: Toss in a can of mushrooms (drained) and some real bacon bits to kick it up a bit and make it special. Got left over stuffing? Use it in place of the the 4 cups of Pepperidge Farms called for.

Serving Suggestion: Serve with a Caesar salad with Pepperidge Farm® croutons and prepared cranberry sauce. For dessert serve ice cream.

 

Turkey Primavera

From: Campbell’s Kitchen

Prep: 15 minutes
Cook: 20 minutes

Serves: 4

Here’s a quick and inventive way to use leftover turkey, that gives you meat, pasta and vegetables all together in one easy-to-make dish.

Ingredients:

2 tablespoons cornstarch

1 3/4 cups Swanson® Chicken Broth or Swanson® Chicken Stock

1/4 teaspoon garlic powder or 1 clove garlic, minced

2 cups broccoli florets

2 medium carrots, sliced (about 1 cup)

1/2 cup green or red pepper cut into 2-inch long strips

1 small onion, chopped (about 1/4 cup)

2 cups cubed cooked turkey or chicken

1/2 of a 1-pound package spaghetti, cooked without salt and drained

2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese

Directions:

Stir the cornstarch and 1/4 cup broth in a small bowl until the mixture is smooth.

Heat the remaining broth, garlic powder, broccoli, carrots, pepper and onion in a 3-quart saucepan over medium heat to a boil. Reduce the heat to low. Cover and cook for 5 minutes or until the vegetables are tender-crisp.

Stir in the cornstarch mixture. Cook and stir until the mixture boils and thickens. Stir in the turkey and cook until the mixture is hot and bubbling. Add the spaghetti and cheese and toss to coat.

Recipe Tips:

Time-Saving: You can use 3 cans (4.5 ounces each) Swanson® Premium White Chunk Chicken Breast in Water, drained, for the turkey in this recipe.

Works well with julienned ham slices too. Save time and use a bag of Frozen California Blend Veggies (Broccoli Carrots Cauliflower) when making this .

Give it an Asian twist by substituting sliced on a bias scallions for the onion, adding fresh grated Ginger when adding the garlic & skipping the grated Parmesan cheese adding Soy Sauce to taste to the corn starch mixture instead before it hits the pan. If you are using Ham for the Asian style go easy with the Soy Sauce or you’ll wind up overly salty

Nutritional Values per Serving

Using Swanson Chicken Broth: : Calories 396, Total Fat 6g, Saturated Fat 2g, Cholesterol 58mg, Sodium 511mg, Total Carbohydrate 54g, Dietary Fiber 4g, Protein 31g, Vitamin A 125%DV, Vitamin C 38%DV, Calcium 10%DV, Iron 20%DV
Nutritional Values per Serving

Using Swanson Chicken Stock: : Calories 400, Total Fat 5g, Saturated Fat 2g, Cholesterol 56mg, Sodium 358mg, Total Carbohydrate 54g, Dietary Fiber 4g, Protein 33g, Vitamin A 125%DV, Vitamin C 38%DV, Calcium 10%DV, Iron 21%DV

 

Easy Turkey & Biscuits

From: Campbell’s Kitchen

Prep: 20 minutes
Bake: 30 minutes

Serves: 5

Got some leftovers…give them new life in this simple biscuit-topped oven dish, made with turkey, veggies and a creamy sauce.

Ingredients:

1 can (10 3/4 ounces) Campbell’s® Condensed Cream of Celery Soup (Regular or 98% Fat Free)

(Cream of Celery Soup is just plain NASTY, use Cream of Mushroom or Cream of Chicken instead.)

1 can (10 3/4 oz.) Campbell’s® Condensed Cream of Potato Soup

1 cup milk

1/4 teaspoon dried thyme leaves, crushed

1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper

4 cups cooked cut-up vegetables

2 cups cubed cooked turkey or cooked chicken

1 package refrigerated buttermilk biscuits (10 biscuits)

Directions:

Stir the soups, milk, thyme, black pepper, vegetables and turkey in 3-quart shallow baking dish.

Bake at 400°F. for 15 minutes. Cut each biscuit into quarters. Stir the turkey mixture.

Evenly top the turkey mixture with the cut biscuits. Bake for 15 minutes or until the turkey mixture is hot and bubbling and the biscuits are golden brown.

Recipe Tips:

Preparation Shortcut: To microwave the vegetables, arrange the vegetables in a 2-quart shallow microwave-safe baking dish and add 1/4 cup water. Cover and microwave on HIGH for 10 minutes.

OR just buy them in a steamer bag and follow the directions on the bag and save having to wash another dish! Aren’t you tired of washing dishes by now? I THOUGHT so!

We here at DragonLaffs Electronic Media feel a responsibility to post opposing view points on any subject we raise. Now, will someone pass me the gravy and some of the opposing view point’s dark meat?

 

And now from our ‘Some people just have no respect of the act or the police” file…

Couple accused of getting sexy in back of police car

A constable’s deputy in Porter arrested two people for dealing prescription drugs at a Whataburger along Highway 59 Monday, the Montgomery County Police Reporter wrote, and then had to order them to stop fooling around in the back of his car on the way to booking.

The deputy responded to a 911 call at the fast food restaurant after a friend of the couple’s passed out drunk at 2 in the afternoon.

According to the report, Tina Marie Arie, 44,had prescription bottles containing Hydrocodone and Soma. Howard Keith Windham, 30, and the passed-out friend — who was taken to the hospital — also had pills in their pockets.

Arie and Windham were arrested for possession of a controlled substance and allegedly misbehaved in the back of the police car on their way to booking, according to site:

The deputy noticed the pair moving around in the back of the patrol car. He looked in his rearview mirror and could no longer see Tina Arie. She told the deputy she had her head on Howard Windham’s lap because she was tired.

However, when the deputy pulled over to the side of the road, he could see that despite both parties being handcuffed behind their backs, Windham’s pants were unfastened and Arie was servicing his exposed genitalia.

The deputy ordered them to cease the sexual contact and then continued driving to the jail. There were no additional charges.

My guess is they realized they might not get any for a while and took it as their last opportunity, they were heavily into the BDSM scene and got excessively turned on by the zip ties and the cage in the cruiser…. or they saw it as a chance to cross a line off their bucket lists.

 

 

“Wild Bill’s Renounce Your Citizenship Program”

Finally a Liberal program I can get behind whole heartedly and 150%!

America love it, support it, help work to make it better or get the bloody hell out of it you sodden towel head lovin’ whiny Communist arsed Liberal whanker!

 

Today’s Last Bloody Word comes from regular contributor Paul Bader. It’s been a goodly while since I ahve ascended my soapbox and ranted because as was pointed out to me by several of you I was largely preaching to the choir when I regularly did. Today however I just can’t help myself, Paul’s send just basically pushed all my buttons.

This is sure to piss you off as well and is going to be a little lengthy so you might want to refill your coffee, take a couple preemptive pain relievers for the stress headache this is sure to cause and grab a couple TUMS, Rol-Aids or what ever other antacid you use for what its going to do to your stomach.

They subject line of the e-mail Paul sent was entitled” “Your rights are suspended.”

 

Dear PAUL,
In June, 2009, the National Association for Gun Rights first broke this incredible tale out of Shreveport, Louisiana.
At the time, no other gun rights organization had touched the story. But when we tracked down the victim for an interview, we couldn’t believe what we heard, and we immediately sent out a nationwide alert.
The story went viral overnight.
If this tale of government abuse moves you, send it to a friend or family member to get the word out.

---

Welcome to Shreveport: Your rights are now suspended.

According to Cedric Glover, mayor of Shreveport, Louisiana, his cops “have a power that [. . .] the President of these Unites States does not have”: His cops can take away your rights.
And would you like to guess which rights he has in mind?
Just ask Shreveport resident Robert Baillio, who got pulled over for having two pro-gun bumper stickers on the back of his truck — and had his gun confiscated.
While the officer who pulled him over says Baillio failed to use his turn signal, the only questions he had for Baillio concerned guns: Whether he had a gun, where the gun was, and if he was a member of a pro-gun organization.
No requests for a driver’s license, proof of insurance, or vehicle registration — and no discussion of a turn signal.
Accordingly, Baillio told the officer the truth, which led the police officer to search his car without permission and confiscate his gun.
However, not only does Louisiana law allow residents to drive with loaded weapons in their vehicles, but Mr. Baillio possessed a concealed carry license!
What does such behavior demonstrate, other than transparent political profiling — going so far as to use the infamous Department of Homeland Security report on “Americans of a rightwing persuasion” as a how-to guidebook, no less?
Mr. Baillio made no secret of his political affiliations: An American flag centers a wide flourish of pro-freedom stickers and decals on his back windshield.
In fact, when Baillio asked the officer if everyone he pulls over gets the same treatment, the officer said no and pointed to the back of his truck.
Baillio phoned Mayor Glover to complain about this “suspension of rights” only to find that his city’s morbidly obese “commander in chief” was elated at the story: According to Glover, Baillio got “served well, protected well, and even got a consideration that maybe [he] should not have gotten.”
Thankfully, Mr. Baillio recorded a good bit of that phone call. You can watch a video with the transcriptions here. I’ve reproduced a chunk of the call below:

Baillio: (in the context of being asked about the presence of a gun) Well, I answered that question honestly, and he disarmed me.
Glover: Which would be an appropriate and proper action, sir. The fact that you gave the correct answer — it simply means that you did what it is you were supposed to have done, and that is to give that weapon to the police officer so he could appropriately place it in a place where it would not be a threat to you, to him, or to anyone in the general public.
[. . .]
Glover: My direction to you is that, had you chosen not to properly identify the fact that you had a weapon and directed that officer to where that weapon was located; had you been taken from the vehicle, and the officer, in the interest of his safety, chose to secure you in a safe position, and then looked, found, and determined that you did, in fact, have a weapon…then, sir, you would have faced additional, [inaudible], and more severe criminal sanctions.
Baillio: So what you’re saying is: I give up all my rights to keep and bear arms if I’m stopped by the police: Is that correct?
Glover: Sir, you have no right, when you have been pulled over by a police officer for a potential criminal offense [which would be what?! – DB] to stand there with your weapon at your side in your hand [Baillio’s weapon was nowhere near his side or his hand, and Glover knew that. – DB] because of your second amendment rights, sir. That does not mean at that point your second amendment right has been taken away; it means at that particular point in time, it has been suspended.

Will Grigg from ProLibertate, an excellent freedom blog, has this to say:

According to Glover, a police officer may properly disarm any civilian at any time, and the civilian’s duty is to surrender his gun — willingly, readily, cheerfully, without cavil or question.
From Glover’s perspective, it is only when firearms are in the hands of people other than the state’s uniformed enforcers/oppressors that they constitute a threat, not only to the public and those in charge of exercising official violence but also to the private gun owner himself.

NAGR spoke with Mr. Baillio, and he told us that he’s in the process of securing the official procedures and codes for firearm handling and private property confiscation for the Shreveport police department.
So far, the city has been half-heartedly cooperating with him.
“I felt sick,” Baillio told NAGR. “My uncles didn’t die for this country so I could surrender my rights like a wimp. I felt terrible. I was just thinking of all that my family has done for freedom in this nation — including dying — and here they are disarming me at a traffic stop.”
What to do?

1. Read Luke’s commentary here, and participate in the discussion by leaving a comment.
2. Send this around. This kind of behavior cannot go unchecked.
3. Call Mayor Glover’s office to complain: (318) 673-5050.

I’ll leave you with one last consideration. As a licensed firearms instructor in charge of a hundred different students every month, I’m often asked if citizens should voluntarily inform police officers of the presence of a firearm during a routine traffic stop.
While different states have different laws, my answer for Colorado citizens is an emphatic “No”: Colorado law doesn’t require you to volunteer that kind of information, and this case in Louisiana proves why, if at all possible, you should never invite trouble by doing so.
For Liberty,

Dudley Brown
Executive Director
National Association for Gun Rights

First if you are not already enraged just by reading this article I urge you to read the materials provided in the first link (  Will Grigg from ProLibertate, an excellent freedom blog, has this to say: ) after reading about how the confiscation of guns without just cause is only the TIP of the turd pile of flagrant abuses in Shreveport you will be.  While I’m not a member of the NAGR ( I am a lifetime member of the NRA) I have to admit after this I am strongly considering joining now.

I have two question brought to mind by this but first I’ll answer the one I suspect is running around inside of your head…namely, “How the hell can this be happening in the United States of America?”

The answer is incredibly simple and in 2 parts:

A. Cedric Glover, mayor of Shreveport, Louisiana is a member of  Mayors Against Illegal Guns. Mayors Against Illegal Guns was founded by activist anti-gun billionaire and New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg and Boston Mayor Thomas Menino. Both Democrats are  noted lickspittles and laps dogs for  President Obamanation. Bloomberg is the largest funder of the group, having contributed $3 million.

Despite its very misleading name, this national group of anti-gun mayors has lobbied Congress against national reciprocity of state Right-to-Carry permits, against much-needed reform of the federal Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (BATFE), for regulating gun shows out of existence, and for repealing the Tiahrt Amendment that protects the privacy rights of law-abiding gun owners and limits disclosure of sensitive firearm trace data to protect law enforcement personnel and protect lawful gun manufacturers from bogus lawsuits.  http://www.nraila.org/Issues/FactSheets/Read.aspx?id=254&issue=011

B.  Cedric Bradford Glover (born August 9, 1965) is the Democratic mayor of Shreveport, Louisiana — the first African American to hold the position. The Shreveport Police Department under his administration would seem to be flagrant in its disregard of the rights and laws it is sworn to uphold and protect the people with and by. I base this statement on the additional issues bought to light

Are you sensing a theme here yet? No? Well maybe this little tidbit will help, MAIG boasts a membership of some 600 Mayors. I did a random check of 30 Mayors on the list or 5% of the overall listed membership. Guess what? ALL of those Mayors ALL of those mayors I picked at random are Democrats!

Seeing the light now? I thought so!

Now for the two questions that came to my mind when I read this, again the answers if you think about the questions are startlingly easy to come up with.

1.) If this occurred in 2009 why the hell are most of us just finding out about this NOW? Where was the damned media with their “the public has a right to know!” mantra? Where was the  news coverage? Why were they not whipping up a self-righteous frenzy over this possible usurpation of a man’s civil rights by the government? Isn’t this a news producer’s wet dream?

Oh! THAT’S RIGHT! We live in a world of a liberal agenda media who fawn all over the Obamanation! Liberal Agenda = Democrat = Gun Control. The public only has a right to know what they want us to and only in the manner they chose to spin it! It is no longer a case of “All the news that is fit to print”  instead we have “All the news that fits our agenda gets into print.” Gone are the days of Walter Cronkite looking us in the eye from the television screen and saying with conviction “And THAT’S the way it is…” Now instead the unspoken message from the eyes is “Drink deeply of our Kool-Aid. Believe only what we tell you. There is no bias in our reporting because the truth is subjective and is only what we say it is,   there cannot be another side or point of view there is only our agenda and our truth.”

DUH! THAT’S WAY we have to rely on bloggers to spread the word of these travesties of justice and trampling of civil rights!

Speaking of the trampling of a man’s civil rights, to say NOTHING about what was CLEARLY a case of profiling that brings me to my second question…

2.) Where the hell is the ACLU and why are they so deathly silent on this when it is so CLEARLY the EXACT sort of thing they were founded to defend against and be a watchdog for?

Oh! Wait again! THAT’S right! The ACLU is no longer concerned with being the watch dog its was envisioned to be over ALL civil rights, just the ones that grab major headlines, press coverage and promote the Liberal/Democratic touchy feely politically correct ones! Even at the cost of common sense social unrest, moral decay or  that might be detrimental to our National Security or National solvency. DUH again!

Now the answers to my two questions might have raised a second one in your minds, “Lethal if the media is deliberately concealing news like this by not reporting it and the ACLU is not protecting us from Governmental abuses of our civil rights WHO IS protecting us when it comes to our rights?”

Well readers I’ll tell you. When it comes to your Second Amendment rights you have organizations like the NRA- the National Rifle Association and its legislative arm the Institute For Legislative Action. You have the NAGR- the National Association for Gun Rights and I am sure a host of others.

However their primary focus is on serving their special interests ( read “special” as limited scope) When it comes to protecting the vast majority of your civil rights you have people like Robert Baillio of Shreveport with his pistol, (presumably) DragonLaffs reader Paul Bader with his pistol, Impish standing watch in Indiana with his, me here in Houston with my small arsenal and of course there is you with yours.

YOU DON’T HAVE A GUN??!! Given the way things are going the the likelihood of Obama bowing before the UN, kissing their ass and signing away you gun rights don’t you think it’s high time you got one?

 Armed we can require explanations and justifications from those whom we elect over us and as well as make them mindful they serve only at our discretion and pleasure. The first act of any government in subjugating a populous is to take away all their weapons and their ability to resist. The choice is yours, exercise your Second Amendment right to bear arms, be the protector of your own family and both your and their rights, or be one of the sheeple at the mercy of the liberal government’s politically correct socialist, rights stripping wolves.

Ponder that while you’re ruminating on the things you are thankful for this Thanksgiving!

BUT REMEMBER TO

 

P.S.: As I sit here placing the finishing touches on this issue prior to uploading it the fact does not escape me that it seem you managed to get a Thanksgiving Special out of me anyway!

Good Morning Campers…It’s been crazy windy around here lately with warm fronts running into cold fronts being pushed by even more warm fronts, etc, etc, ad naseum. 

Lethal showed you guys pictures of the tree that hit my house…just one small example of the fun we’re having around here.  You need to just grab your umbrella ala Mary Poppins, and float yourself off.

I’m about to float myself off to work (again!) and teach some willing young minds the ancient art of staying alive.

Cheers my friends,

How to burn 2000 calories and enjoy it!

This is just amazing.  Truly, there is nothing that can describe this video for you that will prepare you for the depth, clarity and beauty of this … but be warned.  You need a good internet connection to get the most out of this High Def show.

http://www.simplyzesty.com/social-media/the-most-beautiful-time-lapse-video-you-will-ever-see/

Well, since we seem to be doing videos … here’s a GREAT one called:
Bob
Make sure you watch through past the credits!
http://vimeo.com/user4110239/bob-film

A creature rose up out of the surf and came ashore.
Its garments were made of green sea lettuce. “I am the friendly Witch of the Sand,” she said, “I am only going to sunbathe.”
The sun was terribly hot. Her skin began to bake and it turned as red as a ripe tomato!
What? You mean to tell me you have you ever seen …
a baking lettuce and tomato Sand Witch?

Oh dear, oh dear….more lawyer jokes…

Two lawyers had been stranded on a desert island for several months. The
only thing on the island was a tall coconut tree that provided them their
only food. Each day one of the lawyers would climb to the top to see if he
could spot a rescue boat coming.
One day the lawyer yelled down from the tree, “WOW, I just can’t believe
my eyes. There is a woman out there floating in our direction.”
The lawyer on the ground was most skeptical and said, “You’re
hallucinating, you’ve finally lost your mind.”
But within a few minutes, up to the beach floated a stunningly beautiful
woman, face up, totally naked, unconscious, without even so much as a ring
or earrings on her person. The two lawyers went down to the water, dragged
her up on the beach and discovered, yes, she was alive, warm and breathing.
One said to the other, “You know, we’ve been on this God forsaken island for
months now without a woman. It’s been such a long, long time…..So…Do
you think we should…..well…..You know…….Screw her?”
“Out of WHAT?” asked the other.

The U.N. is a place where governments opposed to free speech

demands to be heard.

Starting a war in the name of peace is like poking a hole in

a balloon to get more air into it.

The government is about to ban over-the-counter asthma

inhalers because they’re supposedly bad for the ozone layer.

So in other words, the feds want you to have cleaner air,

they just don’t want you to be able to breathe it in.

 

Today’s Last Word…is a learning experience for all of us.  It’s brought to us by Darren Hobbs.  Thanks for the really cool geography lesson, Darren! 

 

In the middle of the Karakoum (Turkmenistan) desert, close to the disappeared village called Darvaza, there is a crater of about one hundred meters of diameter and more than twenty meters of depth, called “the hell’s door”.

 

Inside this well, a fire has been burning for dozens of years, a fire that looks endless.

 

The Darvaza well is not a work of nature, but the result of an unfortunate soviet mining prospection started in the 50’s.

 

In 1971, a drilling provoked the collapse of an underground cavity, so revealing a gaping hole leaking enormous quantities of gas.

 

The geologists decided to torch the well to eliminate such toxic gas,

 

The soviets grossly underestimated the dimensions of the cavity: the gas that should have burned out within a few weeks has actually kept burning without interruption since 1971!

 

It is unknown for how long “the « hell’s door » will keep on burning.  Even though the well of Darvaza is located in a region difficult to access, a lot of people gather there to observe this fascinating phenomenon.

 

The intense heat coming from the crater allows to approach the place only for a few minutes because of the unbearable temperature.

 

At night the show is Dantean: the fire burns in all its magnificence, giving the well the look of a volcanic burning crater.

 

THE END

 

Goes for our language, patriotism and political views too! 

Good morning readers, as you were, slurp it if its scalding hot but lets settle down as we’re a very full issue today with some very important information you’ll be wanting to be sure you have time to read.

As some of you might have heard Indiana got hammered pretty hard on Monday with severe T-storms and tornado activity. I’m very happy to be able to say that Impish and family came through this relatively unscathed, with just a very near miss. Here are a few words by our fearful leader:

 Dear Friends,

As some of you may have seen on TV, there were tornadoes and nasty storms that came through our area tonight. All of us are fine, although our house didn’t fare so well attached are 4 pictures of the tree sized branch that smacked our garage.

So, how was your day?

Here is the clearest picture that Impish sent me . Understandably all the photos were a little blurry owing to their being taken with a cell phone and Impish probably shaking a little while he took them.

 Today (Tuesday) will be my turn in the barrel for pretty much the same treatment as Impish, violent T-storms, high winds heavy down pours and possible tornado activity. As of 8 Am here they were already posting warning for the front which is not expected to arrive until the start of the afternoon commute (Unwritten weather rule in Texas…if its bad weather and impairs your ability to travel it MUST ABSOLUTELY start during the morning or afternoon commute and last ONLY as  long as peak commuting time) According to the weather guessers this is all a good thing as we are likely to pick up as much as one half to one inch of much needed rain from this front as it beats the hell out of us. Only thing scaring me is the trees that would endanger my place are about 3 or 4 times the size of those that got Impish!

Lastly on an administrative note, so as not to dash any expectations, I will warn you all ahead of time that Impish and I agreed there was no need for a special issue for Thanksgiving. Most of you will be too involved in making or eating mass quantities of food, traveling to get to said food or hosting a hoard of guests bent on eating all of your food. Then there is the whole football all afternoon before repeating the gorging. This doesn’t leave much time for reading a special issue.

I will be traveling for the holiday and ending up in an extremely rural area where my only Internet access will be at the hotel early in the morning or very late at night. Also it would be my 4th Special issue in 4 months with a probable Christmas Special Issue that would make 5 in 5 months. Given each takes about a week to assemble and tweak that’s WAY too much extra work right now.

I will be including some Thanksgiving recipes this week and next however. This week we’ll look at recipes for the big day, next week we’ll cover some options for creatively dealing with any leftovers.

That concludes our opening remarks briefing now get back to your Leprechaun Laughs reading there is a LOT of it today

TAPS provides ongoing emotional help, hope, and healing to all who are grieving the death of a loved one in military service to America, regardless of relationship to the deceased, geography, or circumstance of the death.
Founded out of tragedy in 1994, TAPS has grown and established itself as the front line resource to families and loved ones of our military men and women. TAPS meets its mission by providing peer-based support, crisis care, casualty casework assistance, and grief and trauma resources.  http://www.taps.org/

Get their coffee and still help them out here: http://www.greenbeanscoffee.com/store/index.php?p=product&id=41&parent=1

 

 

 “If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen!” – Samuel Adams

 

Why is there never something THIS frightening around for the Halloween issue?

 

 

 

Lethal here- (big surprise right?)

Actually we have two announcements today. I’m not 100% sure they exactly qualify as PSAs but I wasn’t in the mood to mess around with a new header for this sort of thing just yet. Besides I wasn’t sure what else to call it to insure it got read.

First, You’re probably used to scrolling right past it but at the top of the blog page right below the permanent header there is a black strips with some white lettering in it. A few really observant of you might have noticed that area appears different today. That’s because there was a slight change and some additions to one of the areas linked to from there. The section that used to be called “WAYS TO HELP TANGIBLY SUPPORT OUR TROOPS” is now labeled “WAYS TO HELP TANGIBLY SUPPORT OUR TROOPS AND THEIR FAMLIES”.

See I recently realized that we here at DragonLaffs had been somewhat remiss in our support of our troops. We were constantly harping on support of the troops, but ONLY the troops. Any service person will tell you their family also sacrifices and endures hardships when they deploy. For some families that suffering unfortunately does not end when their family member comes home. That’s because the notification that there loved one is coming home is generally done in person by a 3 man team and the uttering of the words everyone with a loved one in the military prays to never have to hear :

‘The secretary of defense regrets to inform you your (loved one), was killed.’

To this end I have added 2 new entries to the page after renaming  it to remind us that the sacrifices are not only made by the troops but by their entire families.

  Marines, Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen and Coast Guardsmen are deployed across the globe, going in harm’s way to preserve and protect our freedom. Our military families make heavy sacrifices, particularly as a result of the prolonged war in Iraq and Afghanistan and the continued war on terror. The military men and women serving our nation face personal and financial hardships. Family budgets are strained and those who remain at home face a mounting workload at a time when our economy is unstable and unemployment remains high. The large activation of reserve and National Guard personnel has further strained the resources required to take care of our troops and their families.

The four military aid organizations – Air Force Aid Society, Army Emergency Relief, Coast Guard Mutual Assistance and Navy-Marine Corps Relief Society – have come together to address these escalating needs by creating the Armed Forces Relief Trust – a non-profit fund that makes it easier for donors to make a single charitable contribution that supports all branches of our Armed Forces and their families.

The mission of the Armed Forces Relief Trust is to assist the military aid organizations by providing a single vehicle to accept contributions that benefit the men and women of the Armed Forces and their families. These valuable funds enable family members to be at the bedside of an injured service member undergoing treatment at National Naval Medical Center Bethesda, at Walter Reed Army Medical Center, or other military medical treatment facilities; enable a soldier to fly home for his father’s funeral; provide support for medical costs associated with an airman’s expectant spouse, and more.

http://www.afrtrust.org/

The American Widow Project

The American Widow Project is a non-profit organization dedicated to the new generation of those who have lost the heroes of yesterday, today and tomorrow, with an emphasis on healing through sharing stories, tears and laughter. Military Widow to Military Widow.

Since 2001, over 6,200 U.S. service members have been killed in Iraq and Afghanistan. Around half of these service members were married, leaving an estimated 3,000 military widows across our country. While the service member’s sacrifice is acknowledged, many simply forget or fail to recognize the sacrifice of the spouse who is now left a widow of war. Oftentimes the invisible wounds of military widows are disregarded due to age or a simple lack of knowledge and understanding.

http://www.americanwidowproject.org/about/

Secondly in our Tenth Anniversary of the Sept 11th Attacks we offered a commemorative limited edition DragonLaffs mug. We pledged that fifty percent of the proceeds from the mugs would be donated to a Sept 11th charity and asked that you readers suggest one or we would use the one we had selected which aided the still suffering First Responders to the WTC.

Well we finally received the royalties for the somewhat disappointing sales of the mug as of Friday 11-11-2011. We had hoped to donate in the name of our over five hundred plus readers a minimum of One Hundred Dollars. Unfortunately we only sold 24 mugs and THAT was largely due to one individual who purchased an entire dozen themselves! To that person and all those others on behalf of Impish and myself I offer our sincere thanks for their support of this worthy endeavor.

The net profit on 24 mugs was $103.00. We had pledged to donate half the proceeds of the sale but given the relatively poor sales after microseconds of consultation between us Impish and I, we elected to donate the entire proceeds to The FealGood Foundation in the name of DragonLaffs readership.

As you are reading this, it has already been accomplished via the PayPal account we maintain for DragonLaffs finances as per the charity’s preference. We were waiting to hear back per instructions before transmitting the funds as of Saturday. I imagine Impish will be posting any correspondence between himself and the charity in his next issue.

 

 

 

There is finally conclusive evidence that Osama bin Laden and Muammar Gaddafi are dead:
Yesterday, they both registered to vote in Chicago.

I just hope they both registered as Democrats!

 

 

 

A Child’s First Book of Government Regulations

The Obama Administration’s Official Alphabet Guide for Learning Government’s Role in Your Life
Hi, I’m Omar, the Obama administration’s official kid’s ambassador. Today I’ll be guiding you through some of the many necessary regulations that government imposes on us for our protection — and we’ll learn the alphabet at the same time!

A is for auto. The size, speed, fuel and bumpers of autos must be regulated to protect us from ourselves!

B is for business. Government must levy taxes, regulations, fees, surcharges and paperwork on businesses, lest they take advantage of workers.

C is for cupcakes. Every aspect of child nutrition must be controlled — because we can’t leave it up to the parents!

D is for doctor. Health care guidelines make sure every doctor practices medicine the same way.

E is for electricity. Americans must expect to do without electricity from time to time, because we use so much of the world’s resources. That is why American coal, nuclear, gas and other sources of energy must be restricted.

F is for fare. Cab fares must be tightly controlled down to the tenth-mile because small business owners simply can not be trusted.

G is for ginkgo and other medicinal herbs, which can not be sold without oversight by the FDA, state and local agencies. They’re looking out for us!

H is for Happy Meals. Selling toys with food is an evil marketing tactic, which kids and parents should not be exposed to!

I is for immigrants, documented or not. We must welcome everyone into our country, because open borders and a welfare state promote tolerance and unity.

J is for junk-mail. No longer can marketers promote their products without a complete review by federal, state and local authorities.

K is for knives. Even pen knives and bottles of shampoo represent threats to airline safety and must be confiscated for our protection!

L is for lollipop. Only organic lollipops that contain less than 25 grams of sugar can be sold in the U.S. It’s for our protection!

M is for MRI machine. Overrated tests and diagnostics aren’t always needed for seniors, based upon the government’s “Complete Lives System“, which ensures fair and equitable treatment for most healthy Americans.

N is for NEA, the teacher’s union that has its first priority educamating us kids (after electing big government politicians, that is)!

O is for oil, the source of automotive energy around the world. Government must prevent drilling for oil because cars represent freedom to move around the country.

P is for prescription drugs. For safety reasons, government must put drug manufacturers through decades of testing and regulatory hoops even if certain patients could use experimental drugs. These dying patients could actually die if they’re exposed to drugs that aren’t ready for the market!

Q is for QWERTY keyboards, the electric current, operation and safety for which must be reviewed by multiple agencies for our protection.

R is for the rich. At some point, they’ve made enough money. Those who have grown too wealthy on the backs of the workers should have their excess riches confiscated for redistribution.
S is for shower-head. Unrestricted flow wastes water, which is why government must regulate how all shower-heads work.

T is for toilet. All toilet designs must be reviewed by federal officials to ensure less wasted water.

U is for unions. Unions are collectives of workers who band together to protect workers and elect big government politicians.

V is for vending machine. Government needs to set standards for what kinds of drinks and snacks may be sold to gullible consumers.

W is for warmal colding, the climate change phenomenon caused by humans which results in crazy streaks of hot and cold weather.

X is for X-ray machine. X-rays are discouraged in medical settings (for cost reasons) but used extensively in airline security.

Y is for yacht. Democrat leaders like John Kerry use yachts to visit constituents, but others who own them should be considered overly rich.

Z is for zebra-suits — the nickname for federal prisoners who violate the hundreds of thousands of regulations that protect us 24 hours a day!

http://directorblue.blogspot.com/2010/12/childs-first-book-of-government.html

 

 

Feel stuck in a rut with all those traditional pies for Thanksgiving? Well here is a fall dessert that’s definitely NOT in a rut!

Pear Upside-Down Cake

total time 55 min

prep 20 min

servings 16 servings

What You Need

3 fresh pears (1 lb.), peeled

3/4 cup packed brown sugar

1 tsp. pumpkin pie spice

1/2 cup dried cranberries

1 pkg. (2-layer size) yellow cake mix

1 pkg. (3.4 oz.) JELL-O Vanilla Flavor Instant Pudding

4 eggs

1-1/4 cups water

1/4 cup oil

2 cups thawed COOL WHIP Whipped Topping

Make It

HEAT oven to 350ºF.

CUT pears lengthwise in half; remove cores, then cut pears lengthwise into 1/4-inch-thick slices. Arrange on bottom of 13×9-inch pan sprayed with cooking spray. Mix sugar and spice; sprinkle over pears. Top with berries.

BEAT next 5 ingredients with mixer until well blended; pour over ingredients in pan.

BAKE 35 min. or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean and cake begins to pull away from sides of pan. Cool 10 min. Run knife around edges of pan to loosen cake. Place large platter over cake; invert cake onto platter. Gently remove pan. Cool cake slightly. Serve topped with COOL WHIP.

Special Extra

Stir additional 1/4 tsp. pumpkin pie spice into COOL WHIP before serving over cake.

Note

If you don’t have a large platter, invert cake onto baking sheet instead.

Make Ahead

Cake can be made ahead of time. Serve at room temperature. Refrigerate leftovers.

nutritional information per serving:

Calories 300 Total fat 10 g Saturated fat 3 g

Cholesterol 55 mg Sodium 330 mg Carbohydrate 50 g

Dietary fiber 1 g Sugars 38 g Protein 3 g Vitamin A 0 %DV

Vitamin C 0 %DV Calcium 6 %DV Iron 6 %DV

For those of you who really don’t like turkey all that much ( or worse yet have to suffer through over cooked dried out turkey year after year), those of you who really go to Thanksgiving just for the desserts and you few who are not afraid of dying happy in a diabetic coma this next one is for you:

Chocolate Caramel Banana Upside-Down Cake

Topping:

1 stick butter
3/4 c light brown sugar
3 ripe bananas, cut into 1/4-inch slices
(I thought the caramel was a little too much. I would use 3/4 stick butter, 1/2 c brown sugar next time)

 

Cake:

3/4 c plus 2 T unbleached all-purpose flour (I used King Arthur flour)
6 T (1/4 c plus 2T) unsweetened Dutch process cocoa powder
3/4 t baking soda
1/4 t salt
6 T (3/4 stick) unsalted butter, softened
1 c granulated sugar
2 large eggs (room temp)
2 t vanilla
2/3 c buttermilk

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Use a 9″ x 2″ cake pan.
2. Topping: Heat butter over medium heat until melted and foamy. Whisk in brown sugar, turn heat to low and cook, whisking constantly, for two minutes or until the mixture is thick. Spread on the bottom of the 9″ cake pan.
3. Arrange the bananas in a circle on top of the sugar mixture. Set aside.
4. Sift together flour, cocoa, soda and salt.
5. Cream together butter and sugar until fluffy (I used my KitchenAid mixer on medium for 3 minutes). Scrape down sides of bowl.
6. Add eggs one at a time, mixing well between each addition.
7. Stir in vanilla.
8. On low speed, alternate adding the flour mixture and buttermilk (3 flour and 2 milk additions).
9. Scrape down the sides and then beat batter on high for 30 seconds.
10. Pour batter over the bananas and smooth out.
11. Bake for 40-45 minutes, until a toothpick comes out clean. Let sit on wire rack for 5 minutes. Then carefully invert onto your serving tray. Let sit at least 20 minutes before diving in. The author says it keeps for 2 days in a cake keeper at room temp.

Its Thanksgiving, don’t worry about having to keep this for two whole days…you won’t.

Now in a more “traditional” vein

Pumpkin Cranberry Walnut Muffin

Adapted from Very Culinary Blog who adapted it from Betty Crocker

In large bowl, mix together:
2 c all purpose flour
3/4 c sugar
1 Tablespoon baking powder
1 t cinnamon
1/2 t ground ginger
1/4 t salt

Combine the following in a small bowl. Then quickly fold into dry mixture with a spatula until just moistened. Do not over mix!!!
1 cup canned pumpkin puree (not pumpkin pie mix)
1/2 c canola or vegetable oil
2 eggs
1 c dried cranberries
1/2 c chopped nuts (walnuts or pecans)
Scoop into muffin tray greased with cooking spray or lined with muffin cups (I use an ice cream scoop). Top with sanding sugar or sugar in the raw (turbinado). Bake in preheated 400 degree oven for 20-25 minutes, until toothpick comes out clean.

 

OK having addressed the dessert issue fairly well, lets move on to Breakfast. Those pesky overnight guests either the night before  or Thanksgiving night will expect breakfast when they awake ( you think they’d take YOU out for breakfast even at McDonalds but NOOOO!) You one can be made a head of time to take the pressure off. Leftovers? Surely you jest! Slap some Cool Whip on it and serve it for dessert!

Gingery Pumpkin Breakfast Bundt

Cake:

3 1/3 cups (18 ounces, 492 grams) all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons salt (I used kosher salt)
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
2 2/3 cups (15.5 ounces, 450 grams) dark brown sugar, packed
4 large eggs, room temp
12 Tablespoons (1 1/2 sticks) butter, melted
2/3 cup water, room temp
1 (15-ounce) can pumpkin puree (not pumpkin pie mix)
1 Tablespoon freshly grated fresh ginger
2/3 cup coarsely chopped toasted walnuts
2/3 cup golden raisins (I used regular raisins)

Glaze:

2 cups powdered sugar
2-4 Tablespoons milk

Oven: Preheat to 350 degrees.

Pan: 12-cup Bundt pan. Spray with Pam with Flour or Baker’s Joy, or butter and flour pan generously.
1. Dry ingredients: In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt and cinnamon. Set aside.
2. Cream & Combine: Using a stand mixer with paddle attachment, cream the brown sugar, eggs, and melted butter until light and fluffy, about 5 minutes.Scrape down the bowl. Beat in the water. Add the pumpkin and ginger and beat until smooth.
3. Combine dry & wet: Using slow speed on mixer, add 1/2 the flour mixture until just combined. Scrape down the bowl. Add the rest of he flour mixture. Beat until just combined. Don’t over mix batter.
4. Fold: With a spatula, gently fold in the walnuts and raisins.
5. Bundt Pan: Spoon batter into the prepared Bundt pan and smooth out the top.
6. Bake: Place pan in the oven (never put a Bundt pan on a tray – air needs to circulate through the hole in the center of the Bundt pan). Bake until a skewer inserted comes out clean and the cake springs back lightly when touched. The recipe says 80 to 90 minutes, but mine was done at 70 minutes so be sure to check early.
7. Cooling : Place Bundt on a wire rack and let cool for 15 minutes. Invert and let cool on a wire rack.
8. Glaze: (This wasn’t part of the original recipe and just something I threw on the cake to jazz it up). Mix together powdered sugar and enough milk to get a pourable glaze until smooth, and pour over fully cooled cake.

 

 

 

Impish complained to me that wife told him: “I need you like the desert needs the rain… once, maybe twice a year, for no more than twenty minutes.”

 

 WHY do I suspect that the first one is how Obama sings it and as far as the second one…THE HELL I DO!!!

A Great Online Collection of Audiobooks, Videos, Textbooks, Courses And More

Have you ever thought that the internet lacks, well, a degree of culture?  That there’s too much content that is irrelevant, superfluous, wrong, or pointless?  Would you like a portal site that points you to lots more interesting, educational resources?

If so, then check out Open Culture, at www.openculture.com.  It comprises links to lots of free courses, books, audio books, language learning courses, videos, textbooks, and loads more besides.  

Access to the site, and to almost all of the content, is free.  Though there are some optional extras, which cost money, such as the ability to print out chapters from certain books (you can still read them on screen for free, and copy the text to your clipboard).

 

I stopped by the Chevrolet Dealership yesterday, for a look at the new Silverado1500 pickup. Just for fun, I took it out for a test drive.. I wanted to sense that new “feel” before they become extinct.

The salesman (a black man wearing an Obama “change” lapel pin) sat in the passenger seat describing the truck and all its “wonderful” options. The seats were of particular interest. He explained that the seats directed warm air to your butt in the winter and directed cool air to your butt in the summer heat.

Feeling like messing with him, I mentioned that this must be a Republican truck.

Looking a bit angry, he asked why I thought it was a Republican truck. I explained that if it were an Obama truck, the seats would blow smoke up your ass year-round.

I had to walk back to the dealership…damn guy had no sense of humor

 

 

A frequent subject of debate among Theologians and an even more frequent test question in Divinity Schools and Seminaries is ‘Who was Jesus’?’. I’d like to share with you some of my conclusions after over 25 years of reading about religions but still failing to arrive at any hard answer to the question.

 

Who Was Jesus?? – EVEN GOD ENJOYS A GOOD LAUGH!

There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everyone brother
2. He liked Gospel
3. He didn’t get a fair trial (had a public defender who didn’t want the case and got the maximum sentence too!)

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father’s business
2. He lived at home until he was 33
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:
1. He talked with His hands
2. He had wine with His meals
3. He used olive oil

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:
1. He never cut His hair
2. He walked around barefoot all the time
3. He started a new religion

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was an American Indian:
1. He was at peace with nature
2. He ate a lot of fish
3. He talked about the Great Spirit

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:
1. He never got married.
2. He was always telling stories.
3. He loved green pastures.

But the most compelling evidence of all – 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:
1. He fed a crowd at a moment’s notice when there was virtually no food
2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn’t get it
3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do.

 

 

Check out Wyman Meinzer’s West Texas

Wyman is a Texas Photographer of some renown known for his scenic photos. Check out some of his work here.

Wyman Meinzer’s West Texas

 A guide to who is doing right and whose doing doing wrong by the American Consumer and his family.

General Electric is planning to move its 115-year-old X-ray division from Waukesha, Wis., to Beijing. In addition to moving the headquarters, the company will invest $2 billion in China and train more than 65 engineers and create six research centers.

This is the same GE that made $5.1 billion in the United States last year. but paid no taxes-the same company that employs more people overseas than it does in the united States.

So let me get this straight. President Obama appointed GE Chairman Jeff Immelt to head his commission on job creation (job czar). Jeff Immelt is supposed to help create jobs.

I guess the President forgot to tell him in which country he was supposed to be creating those jobs.

If this doesn’t show you the total lack of leadership of this President, I don’t know what does.

Please pass this information to others and think about it before you buy a GE product.

http://news.businessweek.com/article.asp?documentKey=1376-LOUVYE1A74E901-5NJ1IVKV8LVLITS4VGNO46MQH9

Please pass this information to your friends and think about it when you decide to buy a GE product

You remember good old GE? The company that shirked ALL tax responsibility in 2010 and got off paying NOTHING? This is a great time to pay them back and return the deed!

 

Sears – Christmas shopping this year.

I know I needed this reminder, since Sears isn’t always my first choice. It’s amazing when you think of how long the war has lasted and Sears hasn’t withdrawn from their commitment. Could we each buy at least one thing at Sears this year?

How does Sears treat its employees who are called up for military duty? By law, they are required to hold their jobs open and available, but nothing more. Usually, people take a big pay cut and lose benefits as a result of being called up for active duty.

Sears is voluntarily paying the difference in salaries and maintaining all benefits, including medical insurance and bonus programs, for all called up reservist employees for up to two years.

I submit that Sears is an exemplary corporate citizen and should be recognized for its contribution. I suggest we all shop at Sears at least once, and be sure to find a manager to tell them why we are there so the company gets the positive reinforcement & feedback it well deserves.

Pass it on.

I decided to check this before I sent it forward. So I sent the following e-mail to the Sears Customer Service Department:

I received this e-mail and I would like to know if it is true. If it is, the internet may have just become one very good source of advertisement for your company. I know I would go out of my way to buy products from Sears instead of another store for a like item, even if it’s cheaper at that store.

This is their answer to my e-mail:

Dear Customer:
Thank you for contacting Sears. The information is factual. We appreciate your positive feedback.
Sears regards service to our country as one of greatest sacrifices our young men and women can make. We are happy to do our part to lessen the burden they bear at this time.

Bill Thorn
Sears Customer Care
webcenter@sears.com
1-800-349-4358

Please pass this on to all your friends. Sears needs to be recognized for this outstanding contribution and we need to show them as Americans, we do appreciate what they are doing for our military!
It’s verified! By Snopes.com <http://snopes.com/>; at: http://www.snopes.com/politics/military/sears.asp

Sears Holdings Heroes at Home Program

Read about Sears Holdings Heroes at Home.

 

 

Well we’re a short week and a day away from Thanksgiving and you know what Thanksgiving signifies right? Yup its stopped being about being thankful for ones blessings and become the opening bell to the most heavily commercialized event of the year. I’m talking the Season of Spending until it hurts come January 3rd when the bills arrive  (which then marks the start of suicide season) and leads up to Christmas.

The starting gate for those of you who still insist on doing it the hard and old fashion way is 6AM the morning after the Day of Gorging and Football, or as those in the business of taking your money call it “Black Friday”. This is followed by 2 days or relative sanity (and credit/debit card recharging) before Cyber Monday which is the equivalent of Black Friday for those of us loathe to go anyplace near a retail store during The Christmas Buying Insanity Season.

To help you plan your assault on all those sales here’s a little Intel from the Leprechaun a week early and DON’T FORGET Impish and I like nice presents too! We’re very fond of gift cards and donations especially!

Black Friday 2011 Deals! Best Buy, Walmart, Amazon and Target!

by Jim Brogan

Black Friday 2011: Walmart, Amazon, Best Buy & Target et al. Black Friday and Cyber Monday are always one of the biggest shopping days of the year, 2011 will be no different.

For people who abhor the holiday crowds, online shopping can be a refuge for its speed and convenience. In this season’s tough economy, experts expect online consumers to be increasingly reluctant to pay for shipping, and more proactive about asking for discounts, incentives and coupons.

You can find out nearly every store’s 2011 Black Friday deals at blackfriday.info. Black Friday deals are plentiful so be sure to score the best bargains by doing your research.

Go to DealTaker.com, TheBlackFriday.com & black-friday.net for more Black Friday deals.

You can check also:

ShopLocal.com claims to be the Web’s leading multi-channel comparison shopping site, providing consumers with choice and control in their shopping experience by presenting millions of timely
online and in-store offers on one easy to use site. It features offers from some of the nation’s largest retailers, including Target, Best Buy, Home Depot, CVS, Albertsons and Sears, broken down by category and location.

PriceSpider.com: The advantage of PriceSpider.com is its active search engine technology that continuously scans for pricing and product information. PriceSpider.com compares prices at online and brick-and-mortar stores and even factors in shipping. The site also provides consumers the ability to receive price change alerts via email, view up to six months of price history in order to monitor pricing trends and check sale prices against true average prices, and view aggregated product reviews.

Freeshipping.org: Here you can search for free shipping codes by store, category, expiration date and alphabetical order.

DealAlerter.com: At this site you can set price alerts for items you wish to purchase. E-mails alerts arrive when the price drops below the limit you specify.

Retailmenot.com: Find discount codes for thousands of retailers by entering the store name or browsing popular coupons.
Shipgooder.com: It is here where you can find the most cost-effective
way to ship a gift by typing in the package weight and the ZIP code for your recipient and yourself. The site then compares rates from FedEx, DHL, UPS and the U.S. Postal Service.
Cashbaq.com, Extrabux.com and eBates.com: At these sites you can get automatic cash rebates when you register and shop through links on each site. Compare rebates, which range from 1-30 percent, before you shop.

Related

Black Friday 2011; Radio Shack Ad Flyer

Harbor Freight Black Friday 2011 Ad Flyer

Sears Automotive & Electronics Black Friday 2011 Ad Flyer  <<= remember Sears and their support of our Soldiers!

Staples Early Bird Black Friday Specials 2011 Flyer – NJ & NY Laptop Deals

 

 

Today we have an excellent Parting Shot sent in by Reader Paul Bader in the form of a discussion by Rep. Allen West (R-Fla.), a retired Army lieutenant colonel, serves on the Armed Services Committee concerning why we are not having better results in the “War on Terror” which he points out is badly named and I agree. That’s not the only point of Representative West’s with which I agree. Unfortunately I did not receive it in time for the Veterans Day Issue.

Once again, Rep. Allen West hits the nail on the head

Rep. West was the keynote speaker at this year’s sold-out ACT! for America National Conference and Legislative Briefing.

With Veterans Day tomorrow, we considered it most appropriate to bring you a recent column by the highly decorated retired Army Lt. Colonel, and now U.S. Rep. Allen West. In his op-ed that appeared in Roll Call (highlights added), U.S. Rep. West explains, cogently and concisely, what we must do to win today’s battle against what he terms “Islamic totalitarianism.”

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West: U.S. Must Understand 21st-Century Combat
By Rep. Allen West
http://www.rollcall.com/issues/57_52/allen_west_united_states_must_understand_21st_century_combat-209937-1.html

Today’s paradigm of battle and combat operations is completely different from what I experienced in 1982 when I was commissioned as a young lieutenant in the U.S. Army. At that time, the battlefield was much simpler.
In broad strokes, there was the Soviet Union on one side and the United States on the other. We were familiar with their tactics and equipment, and they with ours. Both sides wore uniforms, and every now and then we would stage war games on border control missions.

That paradigm has completely disappeared, leaving in its place an asymmetrical battlefield with non-uniformed, non-state belligerents using unconventional weapons and tactics. If the United States is going to be successful in protecting its citizens and interests, it must quickly understand and adapt to this new battlefield and be prepared for success and victory.
While America may lack an appropriate strategic level perspective, we will never lose at the tactical level on the ground because the United States has the best soldiers, sailors, airmen, Marines and Coast Guardsmen the world has ever known. But without the correct strategic and operational goals and objectives, we will find ourselves on the proverbial hamster wheel. No matter how much effort we exert on the wheel, we will not make forward progress.

To begin with, we must correctly identify our enemy. It is frankly naive to say we are at war with “terror” because a nation cannot be at war with a tactic. Imagine, if during World War II, the United States went to war against the “blitzkrieg” or the “kamikaze.”

Further, we cannot narrowly define the enemy as simply al-Qaida or the Taliban. It is just as ridiculous to say we declared war against the 12th German Panzer Division or the 55th Japanese Infantry Regiment in World War II or the 7th Guards Tank Division during the Cold War.

Before the rise of al-Qaida, the terrorist group which had inflicted the most damage on the United States was Hezbollah. Now Hezbollah has become a very capable military force, albeit one without state or uniform — so capable in fact, it has armed missiles within striking distance of every city in Israel.

The Obama administration has failed to identify Hezbollah as an enemy. On this 21st century battlefield we are not fighting against a single organization, leader or nation. We are fighting against the ideology of Islamic totalitarianism, manifested at a tactical level as terrorism, which knows no country and recognizes no borders.

Until we, as a nation, are able to correctly and openly identify our enemy, we will continue to put our men and women on the ground in harm’s way without a clear mission for success. Once we have identified the enemy, we must ensure we have clearly identified the specific strategic level objectives to effectively fight. I believe there are four:

1. Deny the enemy sanctuary. The number one asset our military has is strategic mobility. When that is curtailed by a focus on nation-building or occupation-style warfare, we eliminate our primary advantage, and worse, our military forces become targets. Because this enemy has no respect for borders or boundaries, we must be willing to take the fight directly to him.

2. Cut off the enemy’s flow of men, material and resources. We have to interdict the enemy’s flow of resources in order to prevent the ability to fund, supply and replenish his ranks.

3. Win the information war. Unfortunately, the enemy is far more adept at exploiting the power of the Internet, broadcast media and dissemination of powerful imagery. In addition, I fear our media now sees itself as an ideological political wing. If we cannot fully use our own national informational power as an asset, we will lose the strategic battle, if not our country.

4. Cordon off the enemy and reduce his sphere of influence. We must shrink the enemy’s territory, but we are not being effective. We are allowing, if not welcoming, the enemy into the United States. What happened with Maj. Nidal Hasan, the alleged Fort Hood shooter, should not have happened in this country. We must not turn a blind eye to a very bold enemy who is telling us exactly what he wants to do and is willing to bring the battle to our doorstep.

We must recognize that Afghanistan and Iraq are not distinct wars, but combat theaters of operation. It is up to our elected leaders and our senior military officials to identify and agree on the correct strategic goals and objectives in order to be successful on these battlefields and others. When we have a proper national security strategy, we will have a focused national military strategy, preparing the defense-industrial base to develop the right weapons systems for victory.

We must be mindful of the wise words compiled by Sun Tzu in “The Art of War” more than 25 centuries ago, “to know your enemy and to know yourself and to know the environment and countless amounts of battles, you will always be victorious.” If we do not understand this simple maxim, we face dark days ahead.

For the sake of our nation, and of all nations who seek freedom for their citizens, we must clearly identify the 21st century battlefield and ensure we are victorious on it.
Rep. Allen West

(R-Fla.), a retired Army lieutenant colonel, serves on the Armed Services Committee.

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Now why couldn’t THIS have been the freshman Black Congressman running for the Presidency instead of the Obamanation in 2008?

Better yet why aren’t Republicans putting him up for consideration as their Candidate instead of the host of buffoons currently staring in the Monkey House Debates?