Dragon Laffs #1249


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Good Morning Campers…adult-Content2_thumb1_thumb_thumbIt’s been crazy windy around here lately with warm fronts running into cold fronts being pushed by even more warm fronts, etc, etc, ad naseum. 

Lethal showed you guys pictures of the tree that hit my house…just one small example of the fun we’re having around here.  You need to just grab your umbrella ala Mary Poppins, and float yourself off.

I’m about to float myself off to work (again!) and teach some willing young minds the ancient art of staying alive.

Cheers my friends,

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How to burn 2000 calories and enjoy it!

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This is just amazing.  Truly, there is nothing that can describe this video for you that will prepare you for the depth, clarity and beauty of this … but be warned.  You need a good internet connection to get the most out of this High Def show.

http://www.simplyzesty.com/social-media/the-most-beautiful-time-lapse-video-you-will-ever-see/

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Well, since we seem to be doing videos … here’s a GREAT one called:
Bob
Make sure you watch through past the credits!
http://vimeo.com/user4110239/bob-film

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Godfather Pizza former CEO Herman Cain surged into second
place in the GOP polls for president. He has scored very well
in the debates. In times of recession the voters seem to like his
promise of less government, lower taxes and two free toppings.

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Groaner Zack

A creature rose up out of the surf and came ashore. ashamed zack
Its garments were made of green sea lettuce. “I am the friendly Witch of the Sand,” she said, “I am only going to sunbathe.”
The sun was terribly hot. Her skin began to bake and it turned as red as a ripe tomato!
What? You mean to tell me you have you ever seen …
a baking lettuce and tomato Sand Witch?

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The White House planned sanctions on Iran after foiling a
terrorist attack. Iran tried to assassinate a Saudi ambassador
in Washington by hiring a Mexican hit man. It caused anger
when people realized that American hit men are seeing their
jobs out-sourced to Mexico.
anibanana
President Obama says if the Republicans don’t pass his jobs bill,
they’ll have to be the ones to explain to the children why their
teachers were laid off. The Republicans are responding by telling
kids the Democrats obviously want to give them more homework.

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Tokyo hotels offered free flights to Japan Friday to revive
tourism after their nuclear accident. They’re still recovering.
U.S. scientists recently measured nuclear radiation in their
fish with a Geiger counter and concluded that we overthrew
Saddam Hussein for less.
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A poll says that 50% of Americans support legalized marijuana. Most
of those were people who have invested money in Little Debbie’s,
Hostess and Nabisco.

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Motivational Hobbits

Motivational Hobby

Motivational Honey

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Oh dear, oh dear….more lawyer jokes…

Two lawyers had been stranded on a desert island for several months. The
only thing on the island was a tall coconut tree that provided them their
only food. Each day one of the lawyers would climb to the top to see if he
could spot a rescue boat coming.
One day the lawyer yelled down from the tree, “WOW, I just can’t believe
my eyes. There is a woman out there floating in our direction.”
The lawyer on the ground was most skeptical and said, “You’re
hallucinating, you’ve finally lost your mind.”
But within a few minutes, up to the beach floated a stunningly beautiful
woman, face up, totally naked, unconscious, without even so much as a ring
or earrings on her person. The two lawyers went down to the water, dragged
her up on the beach and discovered, yes, she was alive, warm and breathing.
One said to the other, “You know, we’ve been on this God forsaken island for
months now without a woman. It’s been such a long, long time…..So…Do
you think we should…..well…..You know…….Screw her?”
“Out of WHAT?” asked the other.

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Dear guy walking a Chihuahua to impress girls,
Oh, that didn’t end well…

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763

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If we are to learn anything of value from Star Trek, it’s that the universe is filled with vastly different styles of foreheads.
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The U.S. Postal Service will increase the cost of mailing a
letter to 45 cents, beginning in January; mailing a postcard
increases to 32 cents. In a brilliant cost-saving move, I plan
to start stapling my credit card payments and checks
directly to post cards.

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764

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The U.N. is a place where governments opposed to free speech
demands to be heard.
applause

Starting a war in the name of peace is like poking a hole in
a balloon to get more air into it.
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The government is about to ban over-the-counter asthma
inhalers because they’re supposedly bad for the ozone layer.
So in other words, the feds want you to have cleaner air,
they just don’t want you to be able to breathe it in.

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Today’s Last Word…is a learning experience for all of us.  It’s brought to us by Darren Hobbs.  Thanks for the really cool geography lesson, Darren!image 

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In the middle of the Karakoum (Turkmenistan) desert, close to the disappeared village called Darvaza, there is a crater of about one hundred meters of diameter and more than twenty meters of depth, called “the hell’s door”.

 

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Inside this well, a fire has been burning for dozens of years, a fire that looks endless.

 

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The Darvaza well is not a work of nature, but the result of an unfortunate soviet mining prospection started in the 50’s.

 

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In 1971, a drilling provoked the collapse of an underground cavity, so revealing a gaping hole leaking enormous quantities of gas.

 

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The geologists decided to torch the well to eliminate such toxic gas,

 

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The soviets grossly underestimated the dimensions of the cavity: the gas that should have burned out within a few weeks has actually kept burning without interruption since 1971!

 

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It is unknown for how long “the « hell’s door » will keep on burning.  Even though the well of Darvaza is located in a region difficult to access, a lot of people gather there to observe this fascinating phenomenon.

 

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The intense heat coming from the crater allows to approach the place only for a few minutes because of the unbearable temperature.

 

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At night the show is Dantean: the fire burns in all its magnificence, giving the well the look of a volcanic burning crater.

 

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THE END

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20 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1249

  1. I’m going shopping. For hair dye. By the time I get back here, I’m gonna be a brunette.

  2. P.S.

    I voice that I’m lacking in clarification, and the Leprechaun delivers insults … yet it’s ME who’s threatened with toasting!

    And, you wonder why I’m confused …..

    • lethalleprechaun says:

      OH HELL THAT ONE IS EASY!

      You’re confused because of an inability to keep up with us which is a result of a personal two fold deficiency you possess (namely):

      A.) You’re not an immortal mythical creature.

      B.) You’re BLONDE!!

      Hope this clears it up!

      P.S….The reason I never gt flamed is because if he flamed me this place would fall down around his ears in under a week.
      Also I keep the account numbers and access codes for ALL Impish’s accounts on me at all times written on flash paper. He so much as attempts to light my cigar with a single snort from a single nostril and his fortune literally goes up in smoke.

  3. lethalleprechaun says:

    Someone’s gonna get flamed breathed! Someone’s gonna get flamed breathed!

    And its NOT going to be the Leprechaun!

    Impish I DO NOT for ONE MINUTE believe there could be two such terrible places on earth! The earth could not possibly survive!
    Admit it you’re trying to invent a cover story for you litter box!

    • Both of you need to take a deep breath and back away from the coffee maker.

      • impishdragon says:

        I gotta tell you LL…since we can’t see the spammers replies to you, it REALLY looks like you’re talking to yourself here…Angelia, I like you, I like you a lot, but if you step between the coffee maker and the Leprechaun and I, there won’t be enough of you left for even a light snack.

      • We all gotta die of something.

        If you can’t manage without the coffee, perhaps you should maybe consider halfing the leaded with unleaded.

        I think I’m catching the scent of “singed” coming off my clothing and I’m hours and hours away from the lair.

        Dragons and indigestion are not a good mix.

      • lethalleprechaun says:

        Sadly you have to go to the areas where the spammers posted to see the original posts and then my witty acerbic responses in the proper order.

        None of them seem to be interested in replying and entering a battle of wits where they are at a disadvantage in the first place. Maybe I should just put my responses IN their comments from now on

  4. Impish

    They make a pill for that condition. Honest, it’s Dragon-friendly and it’ll clear it right up!

    🙂

  5. The last word was what? Cheap cloth and a litter box?
    Sincerely,
    Confused

  6. lethalleprechaun says:

    Come on Impish! We BOTH you you made that entire Last Word up out of cheap whole cloth!
    Didn’t you think I would recognize pictures of the “Little Dragon’s Sandbox” despite your enlarging them? The ONLY truthful items in there were the parts about the toxic gasses that come out of there and the fact that the fire never seems to go out!

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