Dragon Laffs #1990


I’m actually writing this to you on Friday, before Saturday’s issue has even published.  It’s now been over a month since Mrs. Dragon was in the hospital for the second time and I have yet to get a bill from the hospital.  I have gotten a couple of insurance statements from ancillary services like x-ray and lab work, but I haven’t seen any bills for anything.  And the one insurance statement that I saw for the hospital portion was incomplete and was over $50k.  Every day I go out to the mailbox is like playing Russian Roulette, not knowing if today is going to be the day that I’m going to have to try to work things out with a huge bill or whether the insurance is going to cover it or what’s going on.  Just another damn thing I’m waiting on.  I’m really tired of it.

And now I have to schedule my hip surgery and then comes physical therapy, then it will either be shoulder surgery or knee surgery and physical therapy after that … damn … it sucks getting older.  And it’s friggin’ expensive!  And people ask me why I haven’t retired yet!  I can’t afford it!  LOL!

Anyway, as things become more apparent I’ll add them to my writings.  In the meantime, let’s go ahead and do some laughing to get us started, shall we? 

Sometimes obeying God will make you look crazy, get you canceled, mocked, and even laughed at.  But, when the rain started to fall, Noah didn’t look that stupid anymore.

great pics & vids
great pics & vids
great pics & vids

Tripped and hit my head on a snare drum and now I think I have a percussion.

great pics & vids
great pics & vids
great pics & vids

An Army Captain is assigned to a remote desert post in Iraq. 

During inspection, he notices a camel tied up outside the barracks. 

He asks the soldier, “Why is that camel there?” 

The soldier says, “There are 250 men here and no women, sometimes men get urges.” 

A month later the captain has urges himself.  He puts the ladder behind the camel, drops his trousers and has sex with the camel.  He asks the soldier, “Is that how the men do it?” 

“No sir, they usually ride it to the brothel.”

Even the drink ware at Cavern de Impish is something special

Wearing a mask inside your home is now highly recommended.  Not so much to prevent COVID-19, but to stop eating.

I was watching a show for about 10 minutes, and this lady was listing all of these great things to do for fun.  Then I realized that it was one of the religious channels, and she was reading a list of sins.

“Come on Bro.  Try me!  See what happens!”

Some of you may have been following the somewhat conversation between Hank and I in the comments section.  And if so, you may know that a few days after I lost my dear Mrs. Dragon, Hank also lost his loving wife.  And he has wanted to share something with me about the death of a spouse and we finally connected off line … and, well, this is what he shared with me.  And I have to say, that I have not read anything that explains it so well.  I don’t mean to take time out in the middle of the laughter to share something so personal and touching, but perhaps this is the perfect time.  Thank you Hank, and I’m sure that mine and all our prayers are with you and your family.  I know that there are no words that help, just know that you are loved.

Thank you for allowing Hank and I to share a little bit of our selves with you at this time.  We’ll now get back to the laughter.

40 years of marriage..   

A married couple in their early 60s are celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.   

Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table.   
She said, ‘For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish.’   

The wife answered, ‘Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband.’   
The fairy waved her magic wand and – poof! – two tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands.   

The husband thought for a moment: ‘Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again. I’m sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me.’   

The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish. !   

So the fairy waved her magic wand and poof!…  The husband became 92 years old.   

The moral of this story:   
Men who are ungrateful bastards should remember fairies are female …..   

When cannibalism starts, Vegans are the closest thing there is to a free range, antibiotic free, grass fed meat source.

RESPECT!!

NEVER underestimate the therapeutic power of driving and listening to very LOUD music.

And 17 of those 20 are on my playlist…my CURRENT playlist.

The most important parts of the Superbowl are the commercials and the food. 

I really don’t care who makes the most baskets.

There’s a really great story behind this warning that somebody knows.

You’ll never be brave
if you don’t get hurt.
You’ll never learn
if you don’t make mistakes.
You’ll never be successful
if you don’t encounter failure.

It’s one of the reasons we’re kept so busy and why we charge such high rates.

With all this “Gun Control” talk, I haven’t heard even one single politician say how they plan to take guns away from criminals, just law abiding Citizens.

Funny how we were raised not to be peer pressured into taking experimental drugs and now we’re being peer pressured into taking experimental drugs.

“Is this Pismo Beach?”

Well, yesterday was the Super Bowl (as you are reading this) but I have no idea of the winner because it hasn’t happened yet (as I am writing this).  The Rams are favored by 4 points as of the writing of this paragraph.  And I believe they will probably win (which ought to put enough of a curse on them for them to lose) (see the reverse psychology I used there?)  but I will be cheering for the Bengals.  Not that I have any real reason to, just because they are the underdogs and haven’t won a Super Bowl in the past, although they have been in it twice before.  So… I guess we’ll see.  And that’s my Super Bowl pause.

Well, and I suppose we deserve another pause here since today is also Valentine’s Day.  Not that it’s going to be special for me this year and, truth be told, it was never really special between Mrs. Dragon and I.  We felt like it was a made up holiday and we didn’t need a special day, once a year to show our love and romance.  We did that every single day, so in effect, every day was Valentine’s day.  If you try to find something, even some little thing or reason to tell or show your someone special how or why they are special to you, every day, then when Valentine’s Day comes around you’ll find that, like us, it’s just another day of the year.  I highly recommend this path much more than trying to do something special one day a year.  Make every day special, make him or her feel special every single day.  It really doesn’t take much.  Trust me.  We never had much and we managed it. 

Anyway, let’s do some of these cartoons and memes, just because it’s the right day for it.

Happy Valentine’s Day to each and every one of you.  May you have a wonderful day.

And that seems like a really good place to bring this one to a close.  May you all have a laughter filled week and may your time be filled with love and happiness.  Thank you my friends and family for being here for me, you are really helping me through a tough time.  I deeply appreciate all that you do.

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5 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1990

  1. Marsha Mastrangelo says:

    Sorry, missed that one, my play list would have to be 16 maybe 15 of those 20. Never a big j5 fan even as the a little kid in the 70s…ha ha. Maybe being a teen made the difference. Still like the classic rock from that time frame to end of 80s. Still help keep me semi sane. MAM.

  2. Marsha Mastrangelo says:

    Please tell me its 7, 10 and 15 missing from your play list.

  3. Stephanie says:

    Love you, man.
    Super bowl commercials were quite blah this year, and thats my favorite part.

  4. Leah D says:

    The most common bankruptcy is Medical . . . go figure!

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