Dragon Laffs #1963 — Happy Thanksgiving

Good Morning Campers, 

Well, I had my pre-surgery appointment today and boy, let me tell you, wasn’t that a huge disappointment.  I didn’t get cut on at all!  Took my blood pressure, checked my blood oxygen levels, asked a bunch of questions (can I walk up a flight of stairs without passing out?  Can I run a short distance? [Depends on who’s chasing me.] Do you ever feel dizzy or pass out? [Well, I do suffer from vertigo] Ever get depressed?  [Yup, from pain from arthritis, which will partially go away with hip surgery] Ever think about killing yourself? [Not until I started filling out this questionnaire])  And then assigned me a bunch of lab tests.  I’m going to have them done tomorrow (Wednesday) so that they will get the results on Monday and we can then schedule the surgery then. 

Let’s just drag this out as long as we can for Impish. 


Anyway, it’s Thanksgiving.  And this is a weird one for us.  Usually we have the Whelpling and the grand dragonettes over for Thanksgiving, have a whole house full, but this year, the ex complained that the Whelpling hadn’t been to her house for many a holiday and it was HER turn.  Rather than face the wrath of Tiamat (seen below) he decided that discretion (caution? terror?) is the better part of valor. 

So, this year, it will just be Mrs. Dragon, Izzy Dragon, and myself.  And then Izzy Dragon gets to go to work in the afternoon.  Working on a holiday!!! How horrible!!!! Just like an (gasp!) dare I say it (pant!) adult! 

Okay, so I just read that out loud and was just reminded by said miniature dragon, that she also worked on her birthday.  Oh say it ain’t so!  Not that!  Not like a real grownup!  OH!  And Halloween!  And I was just told to Fuck Off!  ROFLMAO!  Oh, my little girl has grown up to be such a lady!

LOL!  God, I love that girl!  Anyway, she fits right in this household.  Now, it’s time to start this thing up, so …

Department of health is looking to hire couples married for 7 years or more to educate people on social distancing.

This next was sent in by our dear friend “Friggin'” Pete.  It is a WONDERFUL addition to our Thanksgiving Day ezine. 


After George Washington authorized the first Thanksgiving Day in 1789, 74 years passed without another such day of thanks. Then Abraham Lincoln established the holiday as an annual event in American life. His Thanksgiving Proclamation is worth reading again today:

“It is the duty of nations as well as of men to owe their dependence upon the overruling power of God; to confess their sins and transgressions in humble sorrow, yet with assured hope that genuine repentance will lead to mercy and pardon; and to recognize the sublime truth, announced in the Holy Scripture and proven by all history, that those nations are blessed whose God is the Lord.

We have been the recipients of the choicest bounties of heaven; we have been preserved these many years in peace and prosperity; we have grown in numbers, wealth and power as no other nation has ever grown. But we have forgotten God. We have forgotten the gracious hand which preserved us in peace and multiplied and enriched and strengthened us, and we have vainly imagined, in the deceitfulness of our hearts, that all these blessings were produced by some superior wisdom and virtue of our own. Intoxicated with unbroken success we have become too self-sufficient to feel the necessity of redeeming and preserving grace, too proud to pray to the God that made us.

It has seemed to me fit and proper that God should be solemnly, reverently, and gratefully acknowledged, as with one heart and one voice, by the whole American people. I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November as a day of Thanksgiving and praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the heavens.”

When did President Lincoln authorize our annual Thanksgiving Day? In 1863 – in the midst of the Civil War.

Hard places and hard times are the best times to be thankful. For then we open our lives to the God who alone can bless and prosper us. He cannot give us what we will not receive. An attitude of gratitude is essential to receiving the grace and favor of our heavenly Father. And it is appropriate in thanks for his every blessing, given now and in eternity.

From my heart to yours, have a very blessed Thanksgiving Day.

Thanks Brother Pete.  And a very blessed Thanksgiving to you and yours as well.

I don’t know, if the police do get called, that’s all the more fun … at least in my book.

Not only is it okay, it’s highly encouraged!

Ain’t that the ever-lovin’ truth!

It’s total bullshit how little frolicking I get to do! 

I was made for frolicking.

I fucking knew it!

This Thanksgiving they say that we can have gatherings of up to 8 people without any issues. 

I don’t know 8 people without any issues.

“I was never a woman who wanted or needed a ‘Sugar Daddy’.  But if ‘Taco Daddies’ were ever a thing, my life may have taken a drastic turn.”  

We can’t say for certain that this quote is attributed to Stephanie … but if the shoe fits…

If you don’t get that last cartoon, look up WKRP in Cincinnati Turkey drop on YouTube … it’s well worth your time … oh, never mind, I think I can put it right HERE!

What an absolute classic!  And the greatest thing of all time, was that, unlike today’s TV where they would have shown all the gore and blood, it was all off screen and you had to imagine it all in your head, which I think just made it all the better.  What a wonderful thing.

As I looked at my naked body in the mirror, I thought to myself…

I’m going to get thrown out of Ikea in a minute.

It really, truly does.

It’s always that last one I have the most trouble with.

Sometimes I wonder

If the people who unfriended me in 2019 are starting to realize I was right.

Well, I do aim to please…

Don’t forget to turn your bathroom scales back 15 pounds Wednesday night at 1 am for Thanksgiving.

Amen.  When you are saying your Thanksgiving Day prayers, or going around the table and remembering what you are being thankful for, how about a special thanks for these folks who have offered to give up their very lives for you.

I’m wondering if this is the best school.

I do not burn bridges. 

I just loosen the bolts a little bit each day.

It’s “Before” not “B4”. 

You speak English, not BINGO.

My dearest friends and campers, you know it is you that is one of the things I am most thankful for.  You bring such meaning and love and happiness to  my life and for that I thank you and am thankful for you each and every day.  May you all find love and happiness this day and may you all find something to be thankful for in your family and friends and loved ones.  Until we meet again.

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4 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1963 — Happy Thanksgiving

  1. Leah D says:

    Happy Thanksgiving to everyone, even if you don’t live in the US or Canada.
    It is just the two of us here this year.
    So nice to not have to cook for diabetics, celiacs, and vegetarians . . . now we only have to have no salt, nothing too hard for dentures, and Tums has to be our appetizer!

  2. PAUL BADER says:


  3. kris72663 says:

    Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!

  4. Friggin Pete says:


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