Hi cat staff hoomans, I’z da Chai Amese.

I iz Chief of Ninja Kitties wut works for Lepercon who iz also muh Daddy.

Since he’z workin (and can’t pet me which so not fair cause he gots the warm fuzzy stuff on again) I tell’d him I be helps wiff dis blogging thing he do. Dis way more kitty petting time & treats come to mes after he stops sayin duh bad words at udder one diz thingie he hollars at me for laying on the warm clicky parts  of. I not knows dis ‘dumb ass’ peoples hes’ hollar at (he not even on the thing from his pocket makes the funny noises he talks to) but they must have been real bad, cause he only makes hollar like dat when we kitties do da bad things and won’t stop or when da big blue lizurd Daddy sez is a Dragon makes da really stoopids and Lepercon haz to makes fixes it.

I not think dis blogging fhing iz too hardz. I helps Daddy Lepercon do it al times by  chasin off dat big blue lizurd by make sharps muh claws on his tender parts keeps him from steal materials. Dats kinda fun cause he makes duh funny noises and jumps around lots when I do it. Sumtime he even take mes flying wiff him when I duz it to him. No do dat today dough cause dem peeps wiff da flashy lights took Dragon lizurd aways after they yelled at him for say da ‘NO!’s.

Friday wuz gibed me da ear scratches and say the flashy lights peoples putted him in da big time outs box sumplace secret. I ask Lepercon if Ninja Kitties should go get him back but Daddy say just to gets him his lap top and tell da Dragon if he wants outs before the game dis weekend Dragon gots write his next issue first. Den Lepercon will get him free but no befores. Dragons cry ober dis news da lots, got muh paws all wet! Bad lizurd! I not understand why Dragon lizurd makes duh cries, dis Cuba  place warmer than here right now.

I fhink da hards part is learn howz dis typin fhing works wiff claws and da no fumbs.

OK Lepercon sez I no gots be too talky here,  just get da izzue fhing started. I go take sun bath and have naps now in Daddy’s fleece lap blanket on da couch. Be be back for pets and treats later.

Merrow!

When I’z sez ‘jus da cream peas’ dis not wut I means!

Wut? You fink this wasn’t gonna be kittytastic issue? Silly hooman!

Since Daddy Lepercon is da bizzies try find where they hided the Dragon lizurd I gonna meet you some kitties today dat works for him. You bes nice, give lots of treats & pettin and nobody feel da pains ok?

Daddy sez YouTube is like treats for hoomans. Mommy Molly give us lots of treats so I give you some YouTubes hooman treats.

The Bottle Boys on Britain’s Got Talent 2013

Michael Jackson on Beer Bottles

 

Lepercon sez kitties are sum fhing… ohs! dats it – ‘Natural Disaster’. Accords him if you upset a kitty then naturals there bes a disaster (or Ninja Kitties!). Lepercon knows kitties too good I fhinks!

Dat’s Brutus da Brutal. He be in charge da Ninja Kitty Complainers Department. You gots ‘plaints bout dis issue den you go see him. His office bes next to where they put the sticky things on hooman bleedy parts to sab time. Here wut sign his door hab:

Play more than 2,000 old computer games for free in your browser

Ready for a blast from the past? Long before the days of Call of Duty and Grand Theft Auto, there were simpler computer games that tons of people loved. Now, the Internet Archive has made over 2,000 of these MS-DOS games available to play absolutely free.

MS-DOS is an old personal computer operating system, and the games made for it will definitely have you feeling nostalgic. But, you don’t need to dust off that old computer to play them. The Internet Archive has made them all available to play right through your Web browser. The people over at Internet Archive are still working out the kinks, so you might notice a bug in some of the games.

The Internet Archive’s MS-DOS games are a great way to share a bit of the past with your kids and grandkids. Some of the games are even educational. The catalog includes classics like Master of Orion, SimCity and The Oregon Trail.

Note: Some of the games listed on the site are intended for mature audiences and are not appropriate for your children or grandkids.

To get started, just visit the Internet Archive’s MS-DOS game page and find one you want to play. Then, all you have to do is click on it to start loading the game in your browser.

Source: Washington Post

 

Dat’s duh SC. She bes my birth Mommy. Molly no think SC funny when SC say dis. Called SC bad names!

SC got da bit of a ‘nip problem. Dis is her sleep off da nip under Lepercon’s blanket. Be da cutes while you sleepin’ a good way to get out of trubles wiff Molly.

See? Dis me when I wuz little. Mommy Molly sez I wuz ‘adorkable’. I not kno wut dat is but it gots me lots of belly rubs and out of lots of trubles.

Kitties luv Calvin and Hobbs cause Calvin gets in da trubles jus like a kitty and Hobbs our big kitty cousin!

Ob courses we like da Garfield best of all- eben if he likes da lasagna more than toona casserole.

I finded dis already starts for da issue and Daddy sez I better uses it no make da wastes.

• When did it change from “We the people” to “screw the people”?
• I don’t have gray hair.  I have “wisdom highlights”.  I’m just very wise.
• My people skills are just fine.  It’s my tolerance to idiots that needs work.
• Teach your daughter how to shoot, because a restraining order is just a piece of paper.

Ut ohs! I fhink da smack is being talked heres!

Yups! Dat some serious smack da Lepercon bes talk. No wonder he leff da Dragon Lizurd in da time out box flashy lights hoomans put him in until he makes da next DragonLaffs. Any buddy know wut dis ‘Gitmo’ fhing Lepercon talks about means?

Said no kitty ebers!

Kitties like da soups cause hoomans get da warms from them. It’s nice to sleep on a full warm hooman tummy. Toona Casserole is muh fav hooman food cause kitties get tuna water in our dishes when Daddy Lepercon makes it!

Lentil Soup

 

 

Total Time: 1 hr. 10 min
Prep: 10 min
Cook: 1 hr.
Yield: 6 servings
Level: Easy

Ingredients

2 tablespoons olive oil, plus extra for drizzling
1 medium onion, chopped
2 carrots, peeled and chopped
2 celery stalks, chopped
2 garlic cloves, chopped
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
1 (14 1/2-ounce) can diced tomatoes
1 pound lentils (approximately 1 1/4 cups)
11 cups low-salt chicken broth
4 to 6 fresh thyme sprigs
2/3 cup dried elbow pasta
1 cup shredded Parmesan

Directions

Heat the oil in a heavy large pot over medium heat. Add the onion, carrots, and celery. Add the garlic, salt, and pepper and sauté until all the vegetables are tender, about 5 to 8 minutes. Add the tomatoes with their juices. Simmer until the juices evaporate a little and the tomatoes break down, stirring occasionally, about 8 minutes. Add the lentils and mix to coat. Add the broth and stir. Add the thyme sprigs. Bring to a boil over high heat. Cover and simmer over low heat until the lentils are almost tender, about 30 minutes.
Stir in the pasta. Simmer until the pasta is tender but still firm to the bite, about 8 minutes. Season with salt and pepper, to taste.
Ladle the soup into bowls. Sprinkle with the Parmesan, drizzle with olive oil, and serve.

Minestrone Soup

Total Time: 45 min
Prep: 15 min
Cook: 30 min
Yield: 6 servings
Level: Easy

 

 

 

Ingredients

2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
1 large onion, diced
4 cloves garlic, minced
2 stalks celery, diced
1 large carrot, diced
1/3 pound green beans, trimmed and cut into 1/2-inch pieces (about 1 1/2 cups)
1 teaspoon dried oregano
1 teaspoon dried basil
Kosher salt and freshly ground pepper
1 28 -ounce can no-salt-added diced tomatoes
1 14 -ounce can crushed tomatoes
6 cups low-sodium chicken broth
1 15 -ounce can low-sodium kidney beans, drained and rinsed
1 cup elbow pasta
1/3 cup finely grated parmesan cheese
2 tablespoons chopped fresh basil

Directions

Heat the olive oil in a large pot over medium-high heat. Add the onion and cook until translucent, about 4 minutes. Add the garlic and cook 30 seconds. Add the celery and carrot and cook until they begin to soften, about 5 minutes. Stir in the green beans, dried oregano and basil, 3/4 teaspoon salt, and pepper to taste; cook 3 more minutes.
Add the diced and crushed tomatoes and the chicken broth to the pot and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat to medium low and simmer 10 minutes. Stir in the kidney beans and pasta and cook until the pasta and vegetables are tender, about 10 minutes. Season with salt. Ladle into bowls and top with the parmesan and chopped basil.

Per serving (2 cups): Calories 260; Fat 8 g (Saturated 2 g); Cholesterol 5 mg; Sodium 560 mg; Carbohydrate 37 g; Fiber 10 g; Protein 15 g

SC likes helps Lepercon in da kitchen wefher he wants helps or not!

Mexican Tortilla Breakfast Casserole

An udder kitty fav is breakfast casseroles ‘cause we kitties get to lay in front of da warm oven while it cooks and get a happy from da warms on cold mornings. No touch da ovens doh cause dat gives kitties an maowie!

 

Total Time: 1 hr. 25 min
Prep: 35 min
Cook: 50 min
Yield: 12 Servings

Ingredients

2 packages (12 ounces, each) Breakfast Sausage Links
1 cup chopped onion
½ cup chopped sweet red bell pepper
1 tablespoon olive oil
4 garlic cloves, minced
2 teaspoons chili powder
2 cans (4 ounces, each) diced mild green chilies
2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese
1 cup shredded pepper-jack cheese
½ cup chopped green onion
¼ cup chopped fresh cilantro
4 cups coarsely crushed tortilla chips
10 eggs
2 -½ cups milk
½ teaspoon salt
¼ teaspoon hot pepper sauce

Directions

1. Cook sausages according to package directions; cut into ¼-inch slices; set aside.
2. In a skillet, sauté onion and bell pepper in oil until almost tender.
3. Stir in garlic and chili pepper; cook for 1 additional minute.
4. Add sausage and chilies; set aside.
5. In a bowl, combine cheeses, green onion and cilantro.
6. In a greased, 13-in. x 9-in. x 2-in. baking dish, sprinkle one third of tortilla chips.
7. Follow with one-half of the sausage mixture and one-half of the cheese mixture; repeat.
8. In a bowl, beat eggs, milk, salt and pepper sauce; pour over layered ingredients.
9. Sprinkle with remaining tortilla chips.
10. Bake, uncovered, at 350°F for 45-50 minutes or until a knife inserted in the center comes out clean.
11. Let stand for 10 minutes before cutting.

Anuffer of da Ninja kitties, Scowler Southpaw practices da kitty-fu arts. Dis death of a thousand scratchings opening stand. Scowler sumtimes helps Brutus wiff Complaints Department.

The Cup Song – Pitch Perfect WITH GUNS!!! (Jim Huish from Amber’s Drive)

Shootin stuff give muh Daddy a happy but no ask him sing- hurts kitty ears and makes doggies howl!!

OK PAY ‘TESIONS HOOMANS! I might be da cutes sleepin wiff Daddy’s pistol (no, he no gived me loaded one) but dis da real importants!

New Tick-Borne ‘Bourbon Virus’ Is Deadly And Unlike Anything Previously Seen In U.S

Researchers have identified the cause of a Kansas farmer’s mysterious death this summer as Bourbon virus.

Thought to be transmitted by ticks, the virus “was fast-moving and severe, causing lung and kidney failure, and shock,” The New York Times reported, killing the previously healthy man after only 10 days in the hospital.

Together, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and University of Kansas Hospital researchers identified the virus as a thogotovirus, part of a larger type of viruses called orthomyxoviruses, Dana Hawkinson, M.D., an infectious disease specialist at The University of Kansas Hospital said in the video statement above.

Bourbon virus, named after Bourbon County, Kansas, where the only known patient lived, is similar to viruses seen previously in Eastern Europe, Africa and Asia, said Hawkinson, but nothing like it had ever been identified in the Western Hemisphere before.

He called the experience of working with a never-before-seen virus frustrating, as the lack of understanding of the illness left many questions unanswered for both the patient’s family and the researchers. “We don’t know the full spectrum of disease because it’s the first case,” he said. For example, no one knows whether or not the disease is usually deadly or if there could be more mild cases from which future patients could recover.

Symptoms include fever, loss of appetite, muscle aches and a general feeling of malaise. But while similar tick-borne illnesses typically are treated with antibiotics, this disease is transmitted by a virus, and therefore won’t respond to the medication. Indeed, the Kansas patient did not respond to traditional therapies after testing negative for typical tick-borne diseases at the University of Kansas Hospital, New York Daily News reported.

Lyme disease is the most common tick-borne illness in the U.S., with over 27,000 confirmed cases in 2013, the most recent year from which data is available. Cold weather typically keeps ticks and disease-transmitting insects at bay, but from roughly April to September, Hawkinson said, be sure to protect yourself by wearing long clothes and insect repellent when you could be exposed, and to do a thorough tick check after returning home.

GO AWAYS! I needs muh naps! Hab a big Ninja kitty job tonight get Dragon Lizurd his lap top!

Good Morning Campers,

It’s been a cold week here in Northern Indiana and for a lot of you elsewhere.  It’s been the main topic of conversation for most of the news programs, water coolers, and lunch rooms.  So, it would be silly for it not to be a portion of the opening of today’s issue.

Lethal Leprechaun has been busy with his clients and the tax year and all that business stuff, so I’ve been left to my own devices for the last couple of days.  I’ve tried really hard to stay out of trouble and I think I’ve done a damn good job of it for the most part.

I’ve had a couple of close…

There erupts an explosive knocking at the door.

Hang on a second while I find out who that is.

Diaman rises from her couch and goes over to the closed door leading to the back area of the ice castle, the same place the meetings have been for the last couple of issues.  She rapidly returns to our little blue dragon and whispers in his ear.  Neither of them realize that the small microphone, that Impish sometimes uses for these casual conversations before presenting the issue on Saturday morning, is still on and picks up her every word.

Imp, there are a few members of law enforcement at the door who’d like a word with you.  They were very polite, but I don’t think they will stay that way for very long.

Local LEOs?  From where?  We provide local security.  Who are they?

Um…I didn’t say local.  There is at least one representative from the FBI, CIA, DEA, FT&A, Secret Service, OSI, FEMA, and Homeland Security.  Plus a couple of guys in military uniform that I couldn’t identify and wouldn’t give me any ID.  What should I do?

I’ll work it out.  Ask them to wait in the small conference room.  That’s a love. 

Impish pats Diaman on the bottom and sends her on her way and returns to the rest of you.

Well my friends, it seems as though I’m wanted elsewhere.  So, I’ll leave you to today’s issue and check back in with you later.  So for now…

 

 

It’s been bloody cold here!  Colder than Hell.  This morning, in Hell, Michigan, it was 7 degrees.  Here in northern Indiana, it was –1.  It was colder than hell.

Jean had something to say about the cold.

Yup. It’s been cold.  It’s been cold for a lot of us.  Those of you who are living in warmer climes are more comfortable, but you don’t get this:

My view from work yesterday.  Beautiful.  Friggin’ cold!  But beautiful

 

Yup, it sucks getting old.  LOL!

But, something else that sucks and will piss you off is this next article.  I’m warning you now to sit down and take a deep breath before reading this essay from the Common Constitutionalist.

Race Industry’s Dream Has Come True

Well folks – we may have hit rock bottom on the political correctness scale. Please make sure you are seated, belted in and your head is tightly wrapped with duct tape before reading any further. You’ve been warned.

Idaho, 2013: James D Kirk (no, not the Starfleet Captain – that was James T Kirk) was tried and convicted of “committing lewd conduct against a 17-year-old girl and sexually battering a 13-year-old girl,” reports the Associated Press.

In April of that year, he was sentenced to 20 years. Not enough, in my opinion, but such is life. The case appeared to be rather open and shut, be that both victims ID’d him, as did two other witnesses.

During the trials closing arguments, the prosecuting attorney, Canyon County deputy prosecutor Erica Kallin, stood in front of the jury and evidently felt compelled to sing, or rather quote a little ditty.

The AP wrote that Kallin said “I always think of this song. Some people know it. It’s the Dixie song. Right? Oh I wish I was in the land of cotton. Good times not forgotten. Look away. Look away. Look away. And isn’t that really what you kind of been asked to do? Look away from the two eyewitnesses. Look away from the two victims. Look away from the nurse and her medical opinion. Look away. Look away. Look away.”

Oh, did I forget to mention that the then defendant, now convict, is black?

Well, that particular song didn’t sit well with public defender Eric Fredrickson who “filed an appeal, saying that Kallin may have unfairly affected the verdict.”

During the appeal, Kenneth Jorgensen, the deputy Attorney General, claimed that prosecutor Kallin’s use of the “Dixie”

lyrics did not taint or sway the jury toward a guilty verdict.

However, the three judges who ruled in the appeal said that “enough doubt has been raised as to whether Kirk’s conviction had been tainted.”

Yet the judges wrote: “Nothing in the record suggests that the jurors harbored any racial prejudice or that they were actually influenced by the prosecutors recitation of Dixie, but the risk of prejudice to a defendant is magnified where the case is as sensitive as this one, involving alleged sexual molestation of minors.”

Still seated? Head still taped?

And with that, the three judges threw out Kirk’s conviction.

Yes, you really did read that right. Three judges overturned the conviction of a vicious sex criminal due to an appearance of racism, after publicly admitting that none of the jurors were likely influenced.

This is an absolute travesty of justice, even if the appeal is overturned. The fact that the prosecuting attorney, Ms. Kallin, was an idiot and possibly even a racist had no bearing on this particular case.

But this is the country we live in today – one where true justice will be turned on its head to mollify racialists. This appeal is a dream come true for the race baiting industry, and if allowed to stand will set a very dangerous precedent.

All over the country, black defendants and their attorneys will be advised to cry racism in the courtroom in an effort to induce liberal judges to see racial bias where there is none.

It will, in effect, become a black get-out-of-jail free card.

Okay, so can everyone say Bullshit at the same time?  This is completely over the top!  Get a new prosecuting attorney, and get his ass back in jail!  This whole racism garbage is getting completely out of control.  I’m overwhelmed at the stupidity of our country at the moment.  And it all starts with the Whitehouse and the administrations attitude that continues to compile this bullshit on our country.  Lethal, it’s time to buy our island.

 

Diaman steps back up to the podium and interrupts today’s presentation.

I don’t know about you guys, but I’ve got to know what’s going on.  Let’s see if we can’t peek in on the dragon.  Lethal taught me a little bit about the controls for this… yeah, that ought to do it.

One of the screens on the stage blurs and when it comes back into focus we can see into the small conference room where Impish is seated at one end of the table and the members of “law enforcement” are spread out around the table.  The long, highly polished wooden table looks to seat about 40 or so people.  You wonder if this is the “small” conference room, what the large one must be like.  You can see the men and women arguing with Impish, several of them pounding their fists on the table, but there is no sound.

Wait just a second, I can get this….

Then voices come out of the speakers

…open to debate!  I will not give in to your demands, I don’t care how much my country “needs me.”  The last two words emphasized with finger air quotes.  Any parlaying of this type WILL go through Mr. Leprechaun, but as far as I’m concerned…

Impish looks directly up into the camera and smiles ruefully, wagging one finger back and forth warningly at the camera while reaching under the table with his other hand, he continues

…the current administration can suck my …

Suddenly the picture goes black.  Impish having obviously flipped a switch under the table that shut off the camera and microphone.

Well, let me see what else I can do, but for now, why don’t you folks go back to today’s issue.

And with that, Diaman leaves the podium and exits the room.

 

So how about a little good news?  And it’s cool, too!  From our dear friend Kim Kommando…

In 2013, 37% of American drivers admitted falling asleep behind the wheel, according to the National Sleep Foundation. Several studies have shown that being seriously tired behind the wheel is worse than drinking and driving when it comes to reaction time and judgment.

Even worse, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration says that driving while drowsy is behind 100,000 crashes a year with 1,500+ deaths. Still, in the next week you’re probably going to be driving when you should be taking a nap, because you need to be somewhere. What’s the solution?

Self-driving cars are the obvious answer, but those aren’t ready for daily use quite yet. There are still some legal, technological and financial hassles to overcome.

In the meantime, Mercedes-Benz is teaming up with electronics-maker LG to keep tired drivers – and those around them – safe. This is a good step because technology introduced in Mercedes cars – side airbags, adaptive cruise control, automated parking, etc. – usually ends up in less expensive cars within 10 years.

Mercedes’ new system is called the Advanced Driving Assistance System. Scanners keep an eye on you as you drive. If the system notices that your eyes are closing too much, you aren’t focused on driving or you’ve actually nodded off, it can do a few things.

First, it takes over driving to keep you in your lane and at a safe distance from other cars. It can even brake if you’re about to hit something.

The car will use a stereo camera sensor to tell where everything is. It also uses this sensor during normal driving to dim the headlights for oncoming cars.

Once it has control, the system hits you with sound and light to wake you up. Once you’re awake, you can take back over from the car by moving the steering wheel or tapping one of the pedals. Hopefully, at that point, you’ll pull off the road to take a nap.

The ADAS package is part of a concept car Mercedes is showing off at the Consumer Electronics Show this month.

So, how many of us can use this car?  I know I could!!!

 

Sometimes it’s harder to clean up after some pets than it is for others.  But, this picture is so misleading!  This blue guy wouldn’t have any problems, just show him to the dragon restroom.

 

And here we have four wise sayings from one of our wise(-ass) campers:

1. We all love to spend money buying new clothes, but we never realize that the best
moments in life are enjoyed without clothes.

2. Having a cold drink on a hot day with a few friends is nice, but having a hot
friend on a cold night after a few drinks – PRICELESS.

3. Breaking News: Condoms don’t guarantee safe sex any more.  A friend of mine was
wearing one when he was shot dead by the woman’s husband.

4. Arguing over a girl’s bust size is like choosing between Molson, Heineken, Carlsberg,
and Budweiser.  Men may state their preferences, but will grab whatever is available.

K²

 

I’m really enjoying these wonderful animated gifs.  But, I’m about out.  So send me more folks!

 

The woman said she would try her best.

“Not bad,” said the woman, “I’ve given up smoking and drinking but then I bent over the living room suite and when my boyfriend caught sight of my long slender legs, he pulled up my skirt, pulled my knickers to one side and made love to me right then and there!”

“They don’t like that in Heaven,” said Saint Peter. .

 

 

Boy, that’s not true anymore.  Even the kid’s shows are using language that is embarrassing.

 

 

Here’s an artist’s rendition of our new, proposed headquarters in South America.  Now, I’m not saying we ARE moving, or to which particular small South American Island we are considering overtaking acquiring purchasing, but suffice it to say, that if the conditions in this country don’t change, it’s time to look for a new place to call home.  Cops not making arrests for fear of being assassinated, rapists getting released because of supposed racial prejudice, and all kinds of other stupid shit. So…there it is…

And just now, this bullshit:

BlackLivesMatter protesters are trying a new protest tactic. They are going to restaurants filled with mostly white people that have nothing to do with police or any case of brutality and disrupting everyone’s brunch.

On Saturday, January 3, protesters in UC Berkeley dreamed up an effort they called#BlackBrunch. With this new protest tactic, protesters decided to begin wandering through the “mostly white upscale neighborhoods” in Berkeley and disrupt their breakfasts, brunches, and lunches.

Organizers promised it would be an effort to disrupt any random business, none of which have any connection to police or cases of brutality, in a specific effort to attack white people as they go about their daily business. It is to be “no business as usual,” the protesters proclaimed.

In the words of one agitator, “We’re approaching our last brunch spot! #blackbrunchnyc interrupting white supremacy one brunch at a time.”

The #BlackBrunch protesters in Berkeley relied heavily on the claim that a black person is murdered by police in then USA every 28 hours. But even the usually left-leaning PolitiFact said this claim was false.

The BlackBrunch tactic was also seen in New York on Sunday where one protester claimedthat white people have no right to go out to breakfast.

ATTN WHITE Man, I have no guilt disturbing your brunch. Its YOU that has no right to be here. #blackbrunchnyc pic.twitter.com/mFRq5Q9hbe

— Camila ibanez (@QuePasaApaza) January 4, 2015

Protesters in New York also used the “every 28 hours” claim in reasoning for the brunch disruption.

But one Twitter user challenged the protesters, claiming that one of them threatened her boss. Before resetting her Twitter account to private, Twitter user “Steph A” said “1 of your party of 30 made a death threat on my boss leaving me terrified in my place of work and unable to finish my shift.”

There is no indication exactly why “Steph A” suddenly deleted her website and set her Twitter feed to private.

If you can’t figure out why she changed her Twitter feed to private, you have your head stuck up your ass.  I’m so damn tired of this bullshit.

 

 

Diaman comes back on stage and without a word starts fiddling with the controls.  She looks up at the screen and back to the controls.  Back and forth she goes until quite suddenly…

Aha!

The picture comes back on again with no volume and you get a very quick look at Impish dragon holding up one of the men in a suit and tie over his head.  He twirls the man twice around over his head and rears back to throw him at a group on the other side of the table when the picture cuts out again.

Damn!

Diaman continues to fiddle with the controls

I got home from work today (Tuesday) and found an envelope in the mail from the Publisher’s Clearinghouse.  The outside of the envelope said I had won a prize!  I won!  I won!  I was a little worried that it might be another one of those “you’ve WON the chance at …” type things.  And then I saw where it said “Check Enclosed”. 

Holy crap!  Maybe I didn’t win the $5,000 a week for life, because there were no camera crews and stuff hanging around, but a couple of thousand dollars would sure come in handy!

I quickly opened the envelope and this is what I saw:

Ten bucks.  Dang, I spent more than that on postage sending back all those stupid envelopes!  Oh well, it’s ten bucks more than I had before, but at least now, I can honestly say,

I WON THE PUBLISHERS CLEARING HOUSE SWEEPSTAKES!

 

 

Suddenly the speakers cut in again and you can hear the very distinctive voice of Impish Dragon:

…with pepperoni and sausage…

before the sound cuts back out again.

 

 

The picture cuts back in for just a second and you get a glimpse of Impish on one side of the table with two of the military men on the other side of the table, their jackets off.  Each of them have one of Impish’s hands in a classic arm wrestling stance.  They are both sweating hard and you can see the little blue dragon with his head back laughing, although again, no sound comes out of the speakers.

 

We’ve run many “specials” here at Dragon Laffs before, Calvin and Hobbs, Animal Chatter, all kinds of different picture blasts.  And today is one of my favorites and new.

 

 

This is pretty cool.  I’ve seen similar from the climbers perspective, where the guy had a camera on him while he climbed, this one is done from either a helicopter or a drone…  Nice idea.

 

Diaman stands up from the controls with a frustrated look on her face.  She glares at the screen and the speakers.  Taking a deep breath she turns to the rest of you,

Well, that’s all I can do.  I wish Lethal were here, he knows all the tricks and the override codes and all that.  This piece of junk, just doesn’t want to cooperate with me.

And with a loss of control, she hauls off and kicks the bottom of the podium and rattles it but good.  The speakers burst into life one final time and you hear.

No, I don’t have any Kings…Go Fish!

And another voice says, Mr. Dragon you have to …

No sir.  No I don’t “have to” anything.  You come into MY house and threaten my family, THEN you want my help?  Now you’re going to tell me what I HAVE to do?  That’s just bullshit and you can take THAT back to that ass-wipe you call a boss!

Um… I was only going to say that you still have to discard.

And the speakers cut out again.

So yeah.  I’ve got no idea what’s going on.  But, stay tuned for more.  Hopefully more answers.  Enjoy the rest of the issue.

How about a special motivational (Demotivational) run on “Have you ever been so…”  This should be fun, right?
Um…right?

I’ve been angry enough to flip some desks, but never a tank, no.

Oh, and never drunk enough to flip anything…other than other people off.

Nope.  Never, ever been that mad.

No….but I have been so mad that I’ve attacked a house with my fists….

I lost, by the way.

Well, not cause I was angry, that’s for sure.

And how about one for the road?

 

and here’s another one…

And how about a couple of the dragon…

Now this!  This is the wine that needs to be on my wine rack!

So many, many categories that fit!  My oh my.

 

 

 

And that’s the perfect feeling and aspect to lead into today’s finale…

Rather than a rant, let’s go with another GeeWiz, ain’t this interesting one.  This one will be familiar to most of you old vets out there.  Especially, if you’ve been around long enough to remember World War II.

KILROY WAS HERE!

He is engraved in stone in the National War Memorial in Washington, DC, back in a small alcove where very few people have seen it. 
For the WWII generation, this will bring back memories. 
For you younger folks, it’s a bit of trivia that is a part of our American history. 
Anyone born in 1913 to about 1950, is familiar with Kilroy. 
No one knew why he was so well known, but everybody seemed to get into it.  
So who was Kilroy?

In 1946 the American Transit Association, through its radio program, “Speak to America,” sponsored a nationwide contest to find the real Kilroy, offering a prize of a real trolley car to the person who could prove himself to be the genuine article. 
Almost 40 men stepped forward to make that claim, but only James Kilroy from Halifax, Massachusetts, had evidence of his identity. 

‘Kilroy’ was a 46-year old shipyard worker during the war who worked as a checker at the Fore River Shipyard in Quincy. His job was to go around and check on the number of rivets completed. Riveters were on piecework and got paid by the rivet. He would count a block of rivets and put a check mark in semi-waxed lumber chalk, so the rivets wouldn’t be counted twice. 
When Kilroy went off duty, the riveters would erase the mark. 
Later on, an off-shift inspector would come through and count the rivets a second time, resulting in double pay for the riveters. 

One day Kilroy’s boss called him into his office. 
The foreman was upset about all the wages being paid to riveters, and asked him to investigate. It was then 
he realized what had been going on. The tight spaces he had to crawl in to check the rivets didn’t lend themselves to lugging around a paint can and brush, so Kilroy decided to stick with the waxy chalk. He continued to put his check mark on each job he inspected, but added 
‘KILROY WAS HERE’ 
in king-sized letters next to the check, and eventually added the sketch of the chap with the long nose peering over the fence and that became part of the Kilroy message. 

Once he did that, the riveters stopped trying to wipe away his marks. Ordinarily the rivets and chalk marks would have been covered up with paint. With the war on, however, ships were leaving the Quincy Yard so fast that there wasn’t time to paint them. As a result, Kilroy’s inspection “trademark” was seen by thousands of 
servicemen who boarded the troopships the yard produced.

His message apparently rang a bell with the servicemen, because they picked it up and spread it all over 
Europe and the South Pacific.

Before war’s end, “Kilroy” had been here, there, and everywhere on the long hauls to Berlin and Tokyo. 
To the troops outbound in those ships, however, he was a complete mystery; all they knew for sure was 
that someone named Kilroy had “been there first.” 
As a joke, U.S. servicemen began placing the graffiti wherever they landed, claiming it was 
already there when they arrived.

Kilroy became the U.S. super-GI who had always “already been” wherever GIs went. It became a challenge 
to place the logo in the most unlikely places imaginable it is said to be atop Mt. Everest, the Statue of Liberty, 
the underside of the Arc de Triomphe, and even scrawled in the dust on the moon.

As the war went on, the legend grew. Underwater demolition teams routinely sneaked ashore on Japanese-held Islands in the Pacific to map the terrain for coming invasions by U.S. troops (and thus, presumably, were the first GI’s there). 
On one occasion, however, they reported seeing enemy troops painting over the Kilroy logo!

In 1945, an outhouse was built for the exclusive use of Roosevelt, Stalin, and Churchill at the Potsdam conference. Its’ first occupant was Stalin, who emerged and asked his aide (in Russian), “Who is Kilroy?” 

To help prove his authenticity in 1946, James Kilroy brought along officials from the shipyard and some 
of the riveters. He won the trolley car, which he gave to his nine children as a Christmas gift and set it up as a 
playhouse in the Kilroy yard in Halifax, Massachusetts.

And The Tradition Continues…

EVEN Outside Osama Bin Laden’s House!!!

Good Morning Campers
Lots of good stuff in today’s issue.  Jam packed full.

I think everyone will find something to enjoy in today’s issue.

I don’t have a big lead in for today’s issue.  You could say that I’m still recovering from my New Years…you could say that I’m so busy on my time off that I’ve not the time that I want to put into this…you could also say that I’m just so knackered that I’ve not the mind to write coherently and put funny lines together.  You could say a lot of those things.  The fact is…there all mostly true.  LOL!

It’s been a GOOD holiday at the dragon household and I’m enjoying the hell out of myself.  So, I’m going to continue on in that vein for the next two days and get back to the grindstone on Monday.

Have a great weekend my friends.  Enjoy the issue.

It’s winter time and it may not be snowing here in the corn fields of northern Indiana yet, I know it’s snowing somewhere out there for you guys…

Or my father in Florida.  Whenever I talk to either one of them.  Talked to dad, Papa Dragon Most Senior, the other day, and he said it had gotten a little cold.  So cold, in fact, that he had to put a sweater on.  I asked him how cold it had gotten?
His response? “Geez!  All the way down to 70!”

 

This is pretty cool.  What happens when you step on lava…

 

 

You know we love to give you “life hacks” and this is one of the coolest.  Did any of you out there know you could do this?  I sure didn’t!

 

DNA for snowmen?

Mrs. Ravioli comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner.
He lives with a female roommate, Maria.

During the course of the meal, his mother couldn’t help but notice how pretty Anthony’s roommate is.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Anthony and his roommate than met the eye.

Reading his mother’s thoughts, Anthony volunteered, “I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Maria and I are just roommates.”

About a week later, Maria came to Anthony saying, “Ever since your mother came to dinner, I’ve been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don’t suppose she took it, do you?”

“Well, I doubt it, but I’ll email her, just to be sure.” So he sat down and wrote an email:

Dear MaMa, I’m not saying that you “did” take the sugar bowl from my house; I’m not saying that you “did not”… But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Your Loving Son
Anthony

Several days later, Anthony received a response email from his MaMa which read:
Dear son,  I’m not saying that you “do” sleep with Maria, and I’m not saying that you “do not” sleep with her. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the sugar bowl by now.
Your Loving MaMa

Don’t mess with MaMa!  Just because we’re old doesn’t mean we’re stupid.

I really like this one for wallpaper on my computer.  Turns out really good.

 

Okay, this is a way cool article by our dear friend Kim Kommando.  Did you know that you might be changing your brain (and not necessarily for the better) by the use of touch screen technology?  Check it out!

Did you know that every time you use your smartphone you actually change your brain? A recent study by the University of Zurich in Switzerland shows that as technology has advanced, our brains have adapted to it.

If you use a smartphone or tablet, you probably have an enlarged somatosensory cortex. Scientists have found physical differences in the shape and function of brains that used touch screens.

Over a 10-day test, the Swiss team monitored 37 volunteers, 27 of them using smartphones and 11 of them using traditional phones with fixed buttons. “Writing in the journal Current Biology, the scientists said those who used smartphones had changed the way their thumbs and brains worked together, with a larger effect seen with those who had used their phones more.”

It turns out that using fixed buttons only requires simple hand movements, whereas smartphones require a more complex use of the fingers and thumbs.

Have you ever seen a teenager or young adult using a phone? More than likely, they predominantly use their thumbs to access anything on the screen. By contrast, older adults that have older model phones will be seen using their index finger to access anything on their phone.

The use of smartphones has actually caused an increase in plasticity in the somatosensory cortex of the brain. This is the part of the brain that registers the way touch is used in relation to the body. You can see it in the pinkish area at the top of the brain.

“The part of the brain controlling the sense of touch in the thumbs and fingertips saw much more activity – increasing the connection between them and speeding up reaction time and sensitivity.”

A similar change is observed in musicians. However, this change is not necessarily for the better. Scientists have linked an elastic somatosensory cortex with chronic pain, spasms and movement disorders.

“Worryingly, there is some evidence linking excessive phone use with motor dysfunctions and pain. More research is still needed to unravel the consequences of the altered sensory processing linked to the use of touchscreen devices.”

I know many professional musicians, my own dear father included, who have hand pain.  It’s a new and exciting…and sometimes dangerous…world we live in.  And then there’s this guy…who’s just an idiot.

 

Okay, how about another way cool article from Kim?  For those of us who’ve been space nuts for a long time and know that it is imperative for the species to eventually move off planet, here’s a really cool concept from NASA courtesy of Kim Kommando. 

You have to see NASA’s vision for a Cloud City on Venus

It’s one of the most famous environments in all of Star Wars: Cloud City. That scene where we first meet Lando with the sunset in the background is a truly epic science fiction moment! If there’s one place in that galaxy far, far away I’d like to visit, it’s Cloud City.

Now NASA is making plans to build its own floating colony much closer: on Venus. We typically think of the planet Venus as an uninhabitable greenhouse wasteland complete with sulfuric acid storms and crushing atmospheric pressure. That’s all true, but above the clouds of deadly acid, it’s actually a balmy, earth-like planet.

In fact, Venus is often called our sister planet. It has a similar size and gravity, and even at altitude, the atmosphere is sufficient to shield humans from harmful solar radiation. It’s also much, much closer than Mars, which makes travel there far more feasible.

That’s why NASA’s proposed floating cloud base is such an exciting idea. Trying to land a spacecraft on the surface is ridiculously hard. But an airbase could hang permanently above and allow humans and robots to study the unique atmosphere in relative safety.

The project is called HAVOC, which stands for High Altitude Venus Operational Concept. CNN reports:

The HAVOC model involves placing the astronauts inside an ‘aeroshell’ that would enter the atmosphere at 4,500 miles per hour. Decelerating during its descent to just 450 meters per second and then deploying a parachute, the shell would fall away to reveal a folded airship. Robotic arms would unfurl the blimp which would be inflated with helium to allow the airship to float 30 miles above the planet’s fiery surface.

This is what the end result would look like:

At this time, the mission is just a concept, and NASA has no plans to fund it. But one day, a Venus airbase could allow astronauts to settle there permanently. Here’s hoping! Maybe we can even get a lovable scoundrel to administrate the facility: is Lando Calrissian available?

I’m not sure, but this could be Lethal’s personal assistant Friday…or maybe one of her sisters, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday.  If I had to guess, I’d say she was directing clean up after the Christmas Party.  The red fire in the background is probably the disposal of all the gift wrap that was about waist deep on the premises.  What a party!

 

The Bugs Bunny Story

 

This one is from Kim Kommando and in her words…

FIVE MASSIVE JETLINERS FLY IN CRAZY TIGHT FORMATION

Jumbo jets are getting bigger and bigger. Good thing they’re also becoming more agile, too. The new Airbus A350-900 prototypes are the latest wide-body jetliners. The company decided to show them off with some old-fashioned military formation flying. You’ve got to see these epic aerial maneuvers.

 

Dad, Papa Dragon Most Senior, sent me this video that he got from his buddy Vito, another Floridian with the perfect explanation as to why they both moved down south….and watching this video, I can’t say as that I blame either one of them. 

I’ve been in a couple of those spots before with the ice and the sliding of the cars….not fun.  It sucks to crash at like 2 miles per hour and there’s not a damn thing you can do to stop it.  You actually feel like you have a enough time to jump out of the vehicle and run around the front and push the car to a stop.  LOL!  Not that I’ve ever tried it.

 

There are so many explanations that could go along with this one….and they are all funny.

 

One day I accidentally overturned my golf buggy. 

Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer, who lived in a villa on the golf course, heard the noise and called out,  “Are you okay, what’s your name?”

“Its Jack , and I’m Okay thanks,” I replied.

“Jack , forget your troubles. Come to my villa, rest a while, and I’ll help you get the cart up later.”

“That’s mighty nice of you,” I answered,but I don’t think my wife would like it.” 

“Oh, come on,” Elizabeth insisted.

She was very pretty, very sexy and persuasive…. I was weak.

“Well okay,” I finally agreed, and added, “but my wife.won’t like it.” 

After a restorative brandy, and some creative putting lessons, I thanked my host. “I feel a lot better now, but I know my wife is going to be. really upset.” 

“Don’t be silly!” Elizabeth said with a smile, “She won’t know anything. By the way, where is she?”

“Under the cart!” I said….

 

Jersey cats.  Guido will get Lebowski to talk, don’t you worry.

 

That is, indeed, the normal compromise.  At least if you want to keep a happy relationship.

I know a lot of people like this.

 

We are under a winter weather advisory while you are reading this.  Snow, sleet, freezing rain, the whole shebang!  As I’m writing this it hasn’t happened yet, do whether it turns out to be true or  not, we shall see.  But, this is what sparked my interest in this one.  What happens when you run a water sprinkler in minus 57 degree weather…

 

 

 

Firefox?  Oh geez.  Even the motivationals are being groaners.

 

 

Yeah, I know it’s an old sentiment, but true none-the-less.

 

 

Said from Impish to Lethal just about every friggin’ day!

 

Okay, this is just wrong on so many levels…You gotta admire the cat for hanging in there.

 

 

 

 

 

Again, one of the things we like to do is to pass on to you the year in review that Word Press sends to us.  The report can be read here: https://dragonlaffs.com/2014/annual-report/
It’s actually quite interesting.

Enjoy yourselves.  Have a wonderful weekend, a wonderful week and a wonderful year.

 

 

 

Some of you have been enquiring why you didn’t see Santa delivering gifts this year. [Apparently more than a few of our female readers were hoping to show Santa how good they were at being naughty.] Here’s the reason you didn’t-

Then again given last years…’costume malfunction’ this might be a good thing. See what I mean?

Christmas Surprise Traffic Stop with Lowell Police

A lot of Police Departments have been getting a bad deal from the black community for simply doing their job and reacting (for the most part) appropriately to the actions of those who have committed crimes and attempt to resort to threats of &/or violence against the Officers in an attempt to get away w/o paying for their actions. Youtube if rife with ‘bad cop no donut’ type videos. Well here is a ‘good cop take an extra dozen for the station’ video.

 

Lets finish the old Year out right….

As for me…

Actually I plan on going with something far simpler & more realistic I can actually live with for an entire year- like say a Resolution of 1024 x 768!

Wedding name combos so bad they might want to call the whole thing off

Hope none of these women decide to hyphenate!

 

OK lets face facts- tonight is all about the last opportunity to get wild crazy and besotted before a long dry spell and the unpleasantness of the New Year smacks your face. Those credit card bills for Christmas will be arriving, then  the deprivation of Lent then the April 15th Tax Deadline, then the solemnity of Easter. Not a decent holiday party excuse anywhere on the radar until Memorial Day. Tomorrow? Yeah New Years Day is all about resolutions, hangovers, the Tournament of Roses Parade and Football. At least this year most of us have a few extra days to recover from our NYE’s drunken walks of self shaming.

In either event, lets face it you got to eat. Regardless of if its your party tonight or a football party tomorrow somebody is going to be expecting food out of you either as host or well manner to be invited again guest. Here’s a few ideas while it’s early enough your still sober enough to make them.

Tailgate Queso Dip

Spicy diced tomatoes with green chilies and lots of cheese are cooked and blended until cheese is melted for a quick, crowd-pleasing dip.

 

PREP: 15 minutes

COOK: 15 minutes

SERVINGS: 12

Ingredients

1 pound lean ground beef
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 (16 ounce) box mild Mexican processed cheese, cut into cubes
1 (15 ounce) can chili hot beans, drained
1/2 cup chopped green onions
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
2 (10 ounce) cans Diced Tomatoes & Green Chilies  (aka Rotel), drained

---

Directions

• In a large skillet, brown ground beef and garlic until beef is thoroughly cooked, drain well.
• Add processed cheese, beans and onion; stir to combine.  Heat mixture until hot and cheese is melted. Before serving add cheddar cheese and petite diced tomatoes; stir to combine.
• Serve with pita/tortilla chips &/or veggies of your choice

Diced Tomatoes and Green Chilies come in various heat levels. Pay close attention to what you’re buying.

This is one of those times a mini crockpot comes in handy for keeping it warm.

Can’t find ‘mild Mexican cheese’? (we have a Velveeta Mexican variety down here) just use regular old Velveeta.

This next one is handy because you can put it all in your crockpots (removable) crock today and then let the crock warm up some before sliding it into the cooker part on one of your trips to the sink for water and more aspirin then go back to your nap or football and forget about it.

Rustic Italian Chicken

Savory chicken thighs are slow cooked to perfection along with fresh vegetables and Italian seasoning.  A simple recipe that requires little effort or time in the morning, ready and waiting for you when you come home after a long day.

PREP: 20 minutes

COOK: 6 hours

SERVINGS: 6

Ingredients

2 pounds boneless skinless chicken thighs, around 12 thighs
2 large carrots, cut into 1/2 inch slices
1 medium bell pepper, chopped
1 cup sliced fresh mushrooms
4 garlic cloves, minced
2 tablespoons Italian seasoning
Salt and black pepper to taste
1 (14.5 ounce) can Diced Tomatoes
1 (28 ounce) can Crushed Tomatoes
3 cups penne pasta, cooked and drained

---

Directions

• Spray slow cooker with cooking spray. Place chicken in slow cooker and top with remaining ingredients, except pasta and garnish.
• Cover and cook on LOW for 6 to 8 hours. Serve chicken over pasta and garnish with cheese and parsley.

Garnish Options: Parmesan cheese and chopped fresh Italian parsley

You’ll want/need some warm crust bread with this too or use shells not Penne so it catches the wonderful sauce. I use a slotted spoon to remove most of the solids to a large warmed bowl the toss the pasta right into the remain liquid in the crockpot and carefully toss to coat before pouring it into another warmed bowl.

Got leftovers? It goes great deboned, shredded reheated in the sauce on a toasted garlic buttered roll with a slice on melting Provolone cheese the following day!

Donut Bread Pudding with Bourbon Cream

 

 

Prep Time: 50 minutes

Cook Time: 1 hour 30 minutes

 

 

 

 

 

  Ingredients

2 cups milk
6 eggs, beaten
1/2 tsp. ground cinnamon
2 (divided)vanilla beans, split
18 glazed donuts
8 oz. sour cream
1/3 cup maple syrup
1/4 cup heavy cream
1/4 cup bourbon

Directions

1. Combine milk, eggs, cinnamon, and seeds scraped from 1 vanilla bean in a small bowl.

2. Tear the donuts into pieces and place in a greased 9″ x 13″baking dish. Pour milk mixture over the top, cover, and refrigerate 24 hours.

3. Preheat oven to 325ºF.

4. Bake bread pudding 45 minutes or until set. Remove from oven and set aside.

5. To make bourbon cream, combine sour cream, maple syrup, seeds from remaining vanilla bean, heavy cream, and bourbon. Mix well.

6. Serve donut bread pudding with a spoonful of bourbon cream.

Nutritional Information

Serving size: 12, Serving size: 243g, Calories: 310, Total Fat: 17g, Saturated Fat: 9g, Sodium: 550mg, Carbohydrates: 4g, Dietary Fiber: 1g, Protein: 38g

Personally I’ll be making this with a tray of a dozen day old cinnamon rolls and toping it with a scoop of French Vanilla Ice Cream before the Bourbon Sauce

Nutella Banana Split Bread

This is a beautiful bread that will impress your friends and family by giving them the taste of two different breads in every slice: Chocolate-Hazelnut “Nutella” Bread on top and Banana Bread on the bottom.

Ingredients

1 large egg
1/3 cup vegetable or canola oil
1/4 cup light buttermilk (shake before measuring)
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt (or 1/4 teaspoon table salt)
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 cup white granulated sugar
1/4 cup light brown sugar (lightly packed)
4 ripe bananas (medium-size), mashed well (1-1/2 cups mashed)
2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup Nutella chocolate-hazelnut spread
(Topping) 1/3 cup chopped walnuts or hazelnuts

Directions

Step 1 – Prep oven and pan: Preheat the oven to 325 degrees F. Butter the bottom and sides of a 9 x 5-inch loaf pan and create a parchment paper sling (see photo below–the butter acts as glue for the paper, making it easier to fill the pan with batter). This sling will allow you to lift the bread out of the pan easily.

Step 2 – One bowl mixing method: Whisk the egg well. Add the oil, buttermilk, vanilla extract, salt, baking soda, baking powder. Whisk until well blended. Add the white and light brown sugars and whisk until smooth. Now stir in the mashed ripe bananas, combining well. Finally, stir in the flour, making sure all of the flour is incorporated into the batter, but do not over-mix. Batter will be thick.

Step 3 – Create banana bread layer: Scoop all but 1 full cup of the batter into the prepared pan. Use the back of a spoon to even it out into a smooth layer that reaches all four corners of the pan. Set aside. 

Step 4 – Create the Nutella layer: Go back to the bowl where you left the remaining 1 cup batter and mix in ½ cup of Nutella. Mix well. The batter should be completely dark. Pour this mixture onto the banana batter. Use the back of the spoon to smooth it into an even layer.

Step 5 – Top with nuts and bake: Sprinkle the chopped nuts over the top of the batter. Bake for about 1 hour (it may take a little longer or not, depending on your oven). 

The bread is done when the top is firm to the touch and a toothpick inserted deep into the center comes out clean of wet batter. Cool for 10 minutes on a wire rack before carefully removing from the pan.

Use a serrated knife to gently cut slices and note that warm bread will crumble. As the bread cools, it will be easier to slice without crumbling. (To speed up the cooling process, pop the bread in a refrigerator for 15 to 20 minutes.)

Finally a little decadent ‘Hair o the Dog’ as it were…

Bourbon Coffee Milkshakes

What ?! Did you really think I was going to crack open a fresh bottle of Maker’s Mark just for the Bourbon Sauce for the bread pudding and not find an excuse to drink some?

• 3 to 31/2 cups coffee ice cream,
• 11/2 cups whole milk
• 3 or 4 ice cubes
• 1/4 cup good-quality bourbon
• Chocolate Syrup

Place 3 cups of the ice cream, the milk, ice cubes, and bourbon in a blender and blend until smooth. A good milk shake should be eaten with a spoon—so if the milk shake seems too thin, add another 1/4 to 1/2 cup ice cream and blend again. Divide the shake evenly among the chilled glasses and top each with 1/2 tablespoon of chocolate syrup. Serve immediately

The History and Words of Auld Lang Syne

“Auld Lang Syne” is a Scots poem written by Robert Burns in 1788 and set to the tune of a traditional folk song. It is well known in many countries, especially (but far from exclusively) in the English-speaking world; its traditional use being to celebrate the start of the New Year at the stroke of midnight.

In sentimental American movies, Robert Burns’ Auld Lang Syne is sung by crowds at the big New Year finale . . . in Bangkok and Beijing it is so ubiquitous as a song of togetherness and sad farewells, they presume it must be an old Thai or Chinese folk song . . . while in France it is the song which eases the pain of parting with the hope that we will all see each other again Oui, nous nous reverrons, mes frères, ce n’est qu’un au revoir. Auld Lang Syne is one of Scotland’s gifts to the world, recalling the love and kindness of days gone by, but in the communion of taking our neighbours’ hands, it also gives us a sense of belonging and fellowship to take into the future.

It is one of the many folk songs from the great Lowland Scots tradition collected and fashioned by the pen of one of the world’s greatest songwriters. Burns devoted the last years of his life to the song tradition, and often a mere fragment from some old ballad was transformed by his alchemy into a memorable love song or Scots poem. With Auld Lang Syne, though, the brilliance was already there; this is the Bard’s first mention of it in a letter to Mrs Dunlop in 1788:

“… Light be the turf on the breast of the heaven inspired Poet who composed this glorious fragment.”

One of the most interesting facts is that the Auld Lang Syne tune which is sung from Times Square to Tokyo, and has conquered the world, is not the one Robert Burns put the original words to. The older tune though is still sung by traditional singers. It has a more douce, gentle, nostalgic feel to it than the popular tune a mood evoked by the subtle use of the traditional air sung by Mairi Campbell in the first Sex and the City movie. However, whichever tune it is sung to, and wherever in the world it is sung, Auld Lang Syne retains the great emotional resonance of the original traditional song of the Scottish people of those days in the distant past. Lets leave the last word to Burns himself…

“… is not the Scots phrase, ‘Auld Lang Syne’, exceedingly expressive – there is an old song and tune which has often thrilled thro’ my soul”.

The words to Auld Lang Syne

Fancy singing along yourself? Here are the verses, and a translation of the words to Auld Lang Syne:

Auld Lang Syne-Original Scottish Lyrics

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And auld lang syne.

Chorus

For auld lang syne, my jo,
For auld lang syne,
We’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet,
For auld lang syne,

And surely ye’ll be your pint-stowp!
And surely I’ll be mine!
And we’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet,
For auld lang syne.

Chorus

We twa hae run about the braes
And pu’d the gowans fine;
But we’ve wander’d mony a weary foot
Sin auld lang syne.

Chorus

We twa hae paidl’d i’ the burn,
Frae mornin’ sun till dine;
But seas between us braid hae roar’d
Sin auld lang syne.

Chorus

And there’s a hand, my trusty fiere!
And gie’s a hand o’ thine!
And we’ll tak a right guid willy waught,
For auld lang syne.

Chorus

The Modern Translated Lyrics

Long, Long Ago

Should old acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
And long, long ago.

Chorus

And for long, long ago, my dear
For long, long ago,
We’ll take a cup of kindness yet,
For long, long ago

And surely you’ll buy your pint-jug!
And surely I’ll buy mine!
And we’ll take a cup of kindness yet,
For long, long ago.

Chorus

We two have run about the hills
And pulled the daisies fine;
But we’ve wandered manys the weary foot
Since long, long ago.

Chorus

We two have paddled in the stream,
From morning sun till dine;
But seas between us broad have roared
Since long, long ago.

Chorus

And there’s a hand, my trusty friend!
And give us a hand of yours!
And we’ll take a deep draught of good-will
For long, long ago.

Chorus

 

And it’s the end of another year…

New Years has always been a time of reflection.  What did we accomplish over the last year, what didn’t we accomplish that we wanted to, what do we plan on accomplishing next year.  It’s a time of goal setting, a time of change, a time of reflection.

Here at Dragon Laffs and Leprechaun Laughs Electronic Media, LLC it’s been an interesting year for us.  We have accomplished a lot of the goals we set for ourselves for this past year and yet, we’ve failed at some as well.  Some pretty big ones.

We honestly felt as though we would have been much more wide spread than we are by  now, have much more of a web presence.  We thought we’d have more followers and thought that the blog would be paying for itself by now rather than relying on the donations of a few generous individuals.  We realize that we are very much a niche publication, being desirable to a select portion of people, but we also feel that most right thinking, hardworking, honest people would be able to find something they’ve been looking for in our efforts.  I believe we have taken steps in this direction, but perhaps not enough.  Time will tell.

We do have plans for the new year.  Plans that are still in the working stage.  Plans that include some of you and depend a lot on our own families and our free time.  Sadly, things are not getting financially easier on us, but instead, seem to become harder as the years progress, as I’m sure many, many of you can sympathize with.
On the other hand, we can only stand up and say with pride that our continued support of the military and other service personnel has been staunch and unwavering.  Our compassion for the underdog, the downtrodden masses and the deserving has been complete and total. And our disgust, and aggression against those that would dismantle our country has been continuous and stead-fast.

New Years has also been a time for resolutions.  And although my personal resolutions are not up for review at this time, our resolutions for this e-zine are easy.  Continued support of the things we believe in, continued laughter to battle the bullshit of the world around us and continued growth and prosperity for the foundations that this production has started with and will continue with.

I’m sure my unwavering brother-in-arms and friend to the end, Lethal will have something to add to this, but for me, Impish Dragon, I wish each and every one of you a happy and prosperous New Year.  Know that you will always have a home here, to share and revel in.

Cheers my fellow campers and friends,
Impish Dragon

Come the end of the 3rd Special Issue inside 6 weeks I’m all talked/typed/added thoughts out I’ve got nuthin’ left to say and I hear the call of several Bloody Mojitos while I make a big batch of Shredded Beef Queso which  I’m going to Natchoify over homemade tortilla chips.

So all I have to say is-

I give thanks we’re one year closer to the end of the Obamantion of Liberal Lunacy and may the most you hope for be the least you receive in 2015.

Finally- Please don’t become a sad year end statistic this New Years Eve by drinking and driving. Get a room, use a designated drive, call a friend or family member, call a cab or a get home safely ride program. Remember you’ll not be the only one on the road driving that’s had (more than) a few. This one bad decision has to potential to ruin much more than just your life. If you find it impossible to drink responsibly then at least be Adult enough to recognize it and  act responsibly by making arrangements ahead of time.