Dragon Laffs #1988


Well, the dart tournament was a huge success!  They raised a little over $500 for us, which is going to come in very helpful now that the medical bills have started to slowly trickle in.  The first part of Mrs. Dragon’s illness was before the end of last year and we had already met all of our deductibles and co-pays for the year, so the insurance company is paying for ALMOST everything.  The second time she was in the hospital was after the first of the new year, so all the deductibles and co-pays zeroed back out again, so all of those have to be paid, by me FIRST, BEFORE the insurance starts paying.  The upside is that I won’t have for the rest of the year, but the downside is that I have to pay them all now.  And the car already cleaned out my savings, and … oh well.  The hospital is the least of my worries.  They’ll take a payment plan or they’ll write it off.  Their choice. 

It was sad being out to darts without her like that.  That was always something we did together to help raise money for someone else.  It was weird being the recipient.  And not having her there to talk to about how weird it was. 

It’s been a month now.  Part of me can say that it’s ONLY been a month while the other part of me says that’s it’s been a whole month already.  Both, at the same time.  Weird.  Had my second counseling session today and really didn’t know what to talk about.  I was really looking forward to it and then when I got there, it was like I couldn’t talk.  I’d rather talk to you guys.  I feel like I get more out of it when I write out my feelings.  But, then I don’t want to just sit here and write stuff out to you guys when we’re supposed to be spending our time laughing our blues away.  Not me writing about my feelings (<— said in a smarmy tone). 

And on a personal note to Hank H.  You need to write to me brother and let me know how you’re doing.   Well, I know how you’re doing, but you need to write to me anyway, if you want.  

Anyway, what do you say we throw around some laughs for a bit and see where that takes us and then we’ll go somewhere from there?

The best thing about dogs is that you can act like something really great just happened and they’ll instantly start celebrating with you.  They have no idea what context is … They’re just always ready to party no matter what.

Wearing cheap clothes or driving an old car doesn’t make you broke.  Remember, you have a family to feed, not a community to impress.

My moods don’t just swing — They bounce, pivot, recoil, rebound, oscillate, fluctuate, and occasionally pirouette.

I found one of our old marriage photos.  You can tell it’s old, it’s still in black & white.  July 15th … I forget the year, it’s been SOOOO Long ago!

I think I may need professional help…

A chef, a butler, and a maid should do it.

I was in a job interview today when the manager handed me his laptop and said, “I want you to try to sell this to me.” 

So, I put it under my arm, walked out of the building, and went home. 

Eventually, he called my mobile and said, “Bring it back here right now!” 

I said, “$200, and it’s yours.”

I think people who use the wrong word should have the humidity to admit it.

Because some people just deserve to be turned into trees.

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony.  Then, I laughed again because of the word “Irony”.

Me: Say please.  

Toddler: 

Me:  Say thank you.  

Toddler:  

[Spills Drink]  

Me:  Shit.  

Toddler:  Shit

Breaking News: Olympic Games Beijing 2022 …

News outlets are reporting that the US Bobsledding team named their sled “BIDEN,” because nothing has ever brought America downhill quicker.

I asked my doctor today how long he thinks this COVID thing will last.  He responded with, “How should I know?  I’m a doctor, not a politician.”

I bought a greyhound today.
My wife said, “Are you going to race him?”
“No he’s way faster than me!” I replied.

In Idaho, there’s a 50-square-mile loophole known as the “Zone of Death,” where you can murder someone without fear of anyone, including and most importantly a jury of your peers, saying, “Hey, stop that. You can’t do that.” Law professor Brian Kalt pointed out the loophole in a 2005 Georgetown Law Review article titled “The Perfect Crime.”

According to Vox’s summary of the loophole, the Zone of Death is the part of Yellowstone National Park that’s located in Idaho, while the vast majority of the park is in Wyoming. Wyoming is in charge of all of Yellowstone, so if a murderer were to kill someone within those 50 Idahoan miles, they would have the right to a jury made up of people who live in both Idaho and “the District of Wyoming,” aka the Zone of Death. But no one lives there, possibly because of the unwelcoming name, so it’s impossible to form a jury. Therefore, you have a case that’s impossible to try, not to mention the world’s smuggest murderer. 

Tom Brady, Ben Roethlisberger, and Aaron Rodgers walk into a bar … 

 

to watch Joe Burrow play in the Super Bowl!

OUCH!!!!!

Boy, that didn’t take long to come true…33 years.

Due to inflation and food price increases, the 5 second rule has been extended to 10 seconds.

Good things don’t come to those who wait.  They come to those who work their asses off and never give up.

I’m reading a book called “Quick Money For Dummies” – by Robin Banks

Sometimes I get road rage from standing in line.

I’m going to end this here today and close out with something that ended up being very, very special.  Thanks to Leah D. for this one:

The moment that you left me,
my heart split in two.
One side filled with memories,
the other side died with you.

I often lie awake at night
when the world is fast asleep,
and take a walk down memory lane
with tears upon my cheek.

Remembering you is easy,
I do it every day;
But missing you is a heartache
that never goes away.

I hold you tightly within my heart
and there you will remain.
You see life has gone on without you,
but will never be the same.

Thanks Leah.  It’s perfect and beautiful.  And thanks to all of you who have sent me love and support.  Yesterday was one month that I lost the other half of my heart and it was an especially tough day.  It REALLY didn’t help that I got 3 fucking calls for her.  Two of them should have known better.  One of them from our damn medical insurance company wanting to sign her up for some service or other and the other from the damn visiting nurses office wanting to schedule a visit because they were going off her first hospitalization record when she got sent back home.  Stupid sons-a-bitches.  The other was some dumb ass phone scam, but I don’t expect them to know better.  My own insurance company and my own medical people I expect to know better. 

And then today, at work, it’s like a ran into a hundred people who hadn’t had a chance yet to tell me how sorry they were “for my loss.” And don’t get me wrong, I was kind and gracious to each and every one of them.  I would NEVER be anything but to anyone who took the time out to be kind to another human being, but come on!  It was like another spike driven through my chest each time.  And we gotta come up with another way of saying that. 

“I’m sorry for your loss…” 

“I didn’t lose her.  I know exactly where she is.  She’s not out wandering around in the woods somewhere.”  I cringe every time I hear that.  Some one today said the perfect thing.  He came up to me, looked me dead in the eye (which most people won’t do for some reason) and said, “I felt so sad for you when I heard what happened to your wife.  Please let me know if there is anything you need or if you just want to talk or want some company.” 

And that was perfect.  Because what I could really use right now more than anything else is some company.  It’s been a month and now everyone has stopped coming by.  Everyone has stopped reaching out and, like tonight, Izzy Dragon is going to go to work and I’m going to be here by myself. 

And it’s really bad lately and I really miss her.  And I shouldn’t be putting this out to you guys…and I’m sorry for that, but this is how I deal.  So, I’m going to end this here, call it a day and hope for a better one tomorrow.

Love and happiness to you all.  

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3 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1988

  1. Hank H says:

    there is a thought on the death of a spouse i would like to share, but i cant through the comment section. i can find your email address

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