ALRIGHT! Settle down already will you please? Just because Sergeant at Wings Impish isn’t here to keep order is no excuse to run amuck! You guys worse than a bunch of school kids with a substitute teacher and a post snack sugar rush!

Now I’m cold, cranky and thankfully for the moment (but none of that thanks going to the Democrats or the Obama Administration) over worked.

Between Saturday and Sunday we experienced a 25 degree temperature drop in the high. By Tuesday morning it was closer to a 35 degree drop and I won’t see anything close to resembling 60 until possibly next Saturday.  While this doesn’t sound big to you who cheer when the mercury hits 35 degrees during the winter I assure you day time highs in the 40s and low 50s are a very big deal here as is the potential for near freezing night time temps. About 3 AM Tuesday morning my watch cat woke me by raising a row and a ruction in our bedroom window. When I arose to see what had her so worked up she refused to calm down it was bloody well flurrying out side!

FECKING FLURRIES! ON THE GULF COAST IN TEXAS!

Global Warming me poor frigid arse!

So from the dubious warmth of my shearling lined moccasin boot slippers, micro fleece cargo pants, waffle knit Henley, pull over hoodie & fingerless gloves, I say….

 

 

I’m with him!

 

There’s a third option…send a broadcast text canceling the day due to lack of interest, roll over, pull the blankets up over my head and see if tomorrow is any better…or warmer!

Yeah yeah yeah! I can hear the questions from the peanut gallery already.

None of you opened this issue to read what I’ve worked so hard on. OR to ask how I’m holding up under the strain of running the place single handedly while my bestest bud goes under the butcher’s cleaver surgeon’s scalpel. No! All you’ really care about is ‘How’s Impish? ’ Ok fine. If we get that subject out of the way can I get on with the rest of the issue?

After a rather lengthy and excessive wait in the pre-op area both for the Doctor Nick and for Impish to quit whimpering and come out of hiding a preoperative condition to clear itself up. His last words to me were “See you on the other side Dude”  Impish’s 10:30 surgery finally got under way at about  3 PM EST lasting for roughly 2 hours.

According to Mrs. Dragon Dr Nick reported an over all positive out come (with a minor exception we’ll get into in a second) predicting no problems with his recovery or his physical therapy. At roughly 8 PM my time last night I received a text messages from him demanding coffee that I find someone to open his room window and sneak him a cigar. I exchanged a few texts with him until visiting hours ended which brought about Mrs. Dragon’s thank-god-your-ok-I was-so-damned-worried-good-night-and-good-bye  kiss which had the unforeseen and unfortunate side effect of raising Impish’s pulse of high and fast it set off his heart rate monitor’s alarm.

Yup our boy is JUST FINE!

I spoke by text with Impish several times yesterday in between all the poking, prodding and torture interruptions of an attentive and professional nursing staff and physical therapy. Despite being in a fair amount of pain, all indication are he is on track barring unforeseen set backs to return to being a pain in me backside his Dragon’s lair some time today. This means you might expect a short note from him as early as tonight or possibly tomorrow.

However Mrs. Dragon informs  me privately there was a slight…unforeseen complication with the surgery.

Apparently when they started peeling back his scaly hide they discovered that was was underneath it was was more worn out and deteriorated than they had expected or accounted for. Evidentially every time they tried to replace something what ever they were attaching to gave way or looked suspect structurally. Eventually they got to a point where they had replaced just so much that when they went to recover him with his old hide it no longer fit correctly over the replaced areas (a LOT of area) so they were forced to make some …’cosmetic changes’. Oh here let me just show you:

Here is a before picture of the Impish Dragon we all knew.

And now the well- remember now despite outward appearances he’s still our same Impish Dragon on the inside and beauty IS only scale deep and in the eye of the Beholder (along with its death ray gaze) here he is post surgery:

 

Oh! Look! They have him up and on his feet already!

Further updates as I get them or to come from Impish himself as soon as her learns to type with paws instead of claws and (snicker) gets a shave so he can see his lap top.

A Serious Auto Accident

It was a pretty serious auto accident. Because he wasn’t wearing his seat belt, his face smashed into the windshield.

In a strange twist of fate, he wasn’t seriously injured, but something rather bizarre happened:

The cracked glass pinched his right eyelid and, when he bounced back, ripped the eyelid off. Unfortunately, the tissue wasn’t saved for reattachment.

At the hospital, plastic surgeons weren’t sure how to repair it. Skin grafts wouldn’t do the trick, since plain skin isn’t thick enough for the job. Then one of the surgeons noticed he wasn’t circumcised. The thick, elastic skin there would be just the ticket!

Sure enough, the operation was a success and the new eyelid works just as intended!

But the true measure of success in any plastic surgery is: how does it look? It’s not quite perfect, doctors say: while it works perfectly, he will forever be …a little cockeyed

 

Ruger has made it easy for you to contact your Local and National Representatives

Ruger has made it easy for you to contact your Local and National Representatives. It only takes about 2 minutes and sends a pro-2nd Amendment email to everyone from the president down to your local state reps.

http://www.ruger.com/micros/advocacy/takeAction.html

Taking action is simple, just follow these 3 Steps:

Step 1: Enter your personal contact information below, this information will be added to the letter and is required to reach each of the appropriate representatives in your area. This information is not stored by Ruger, nor is it used for any other purposes than this legislative action.

Step 2: Press “Submit” and we will prepare the letter below, in your name to the President, Vice-President, your Senators, Representative, Governor, Lieutenant Governor, State-Level Elected Officials and State Attorney General.

Step 3: Review your letter one last time, add in your name and press “Submit”! You have just taken strong action in protecting your rights.

No excuse not to do this folks!

Unless of course you’re a logic impaired lunatic Liberal reading this from a gun free zone mutter how I should be shot!

 

Nine Things That Will Probably Disappear in Your Lifetime

Whether these changes are good or bad depends in part, on how we adapt to them. But, ready or not, here they come.

1. The Post Office

Get ready to imagine a world without the post office. They are so deeply in financial trouble that there is probably no way to sustain it long term. Email, Fed Ex, and UPS have just about wiped out the minimum revenue needed to keep the post office alive. Most of your mail every day is junk mail and bills.

2. The Check

Britain is already laying the groundwork to do away with check by 2018. It costs the financial system billions of dollars a year to process checks. Plastic cards and online transactions will lead to the eventual demise of the check. This plays right into the death of the post office. If you never paid your bills by mail and never received them by mail, the post office would absolutely go out of business.

3. The Newspaper

The younger generation simply doesn’t read the newspaper. They certainly don’t subscribe to a daily delivered print edition. That may go the way of the milkman and the laundry man. As for reading the paper online, get ready to pay for it. The rise in mobile Internet devices and e-readers has caused all the newspaper and magazine publishers to form an alliance. They have met with Apple, Amazon, and the major cell phone companies to develop a model for paid subscription services.

4. The Book

You say you will never give up the physical book that you hold in your hand and turn the literal pages. I said the same thing about downloading music from iTunes. I wanted my hard copy CD. But I quickly changed my mind when I discovered that I could get albums for half the price without ever leaving home to get the latest music. The same thing will happen with books. You can browse a bookstore online and even read a preview chapter before you buy. And the price is less than half that of a real book. And think of the convenience! Once you start flicking your fingers on the screen instead of the book, you find that you are lost in the story, can’t wait to see what happens next, and you forget that you’re holding a gadget instead of a book.

5. The Land LineTelephone

Unless you have a large family and make a lot of local calls, you don’t need it anymore. Most people keep it simply because they’ve always had it. But you are paying double charges for that extra service. All the cell phone companies will let you call customers using the same cell provider for no charge against your minutes

6. Music

This is one of the saddest parts of the change story. The music industry is dying a slow death. Not just because of illegal downloading. It’s the lack of innovative new music being given a chance to get to the people who would like to hear it. Greed and corruption is the problem. The record labels and the radio conglomerates are simply self-destructing. Over 40% of the music purchased today is “catalogue items,” meaning traditional music that the public is familiar with. Older established artists. This is also true on the live concert circuit. To explore this fascinating and disturbing topic further, check out the book, “Appetite for Self-Destruction” by Steve Knopper, and the video documentary, “Before the Music Dies.”

7. Television

Revenues to the networks are down dramatically. Not just because of the economy. People are watching TV and movies streamed from their computers. And they’re playing games and doing lots of other things that take up the time that used to be spent watching TV. Prime time shows have degenerated down to lower than the lowest common denominator. Cable rates are skyrocketing and commercials run about every 4 minutes and 30 seconds. I say good riddance to most of it. It’s time for the cable companies to be put out of our misery. Let the people choose what they want to watch online and through Netflix.

8. The Things That You Own

Many of the very possessions that we used to own are still in our lives, but we may not actually own them in the future. They may simply reside in “the cloud.” Today your computer has a hard drive and you store your pictures, music, movies, and documents. Your software is on a CD or DVD, and you can always re-install it if need be. But all of that is changing. Apple, Microsoft, and Google are all finishing up their latest “cloud services.” That means that when you turn on a computer, the Internet will be built into the operating system. So, Windows, Google, and the Mac OS will be tied straight into the Internet. If you click an icon, it will open something in the Internet cloud. If you save something, it will be saved to the cloud. And you may pay a monthly subscription fee to the cloud provider. In this virtual world, you can access your music or your books, or your whatever from any laptop or handheld device. That’s the good news. But, will you actually own any of this “stuff” or will it all be able to disappear at any moment in a big “Poof?” Will most of the things in our lives be disposable and whimsical? It makes you want to run to the closet and pull out that photo album, grab a book from the shelf, or open up a CD case and pull out the insert.

9. Privacy

If there ever was a concept that we can look back on nostalgically, it would be privacy. That’s gone. It’s been gone for a long time anyway. There are cameras on the street, in most of the buildings, and even built into your computer and cell phone. But you can be sure that 24/7, “They” know who you are and where you are, right down to the GPS coordinates, and the Google Street View. If you buy something, your habit is put into a zillion profiles, and your ads will change to reflect those habits. “They” will try to get you to buy something else. Again and again.

All we will have left that can’t be changed are: “Memories”.

And then probably Alzheimer’s will take that away from you too !

 

He was in ecstasy with a huge smile on his face as his wife moved
forwards, then backwards, forward, then backwards again….back and
forth…back and forth…in and out…in and out.

Her heart was pounding…her face was flushed…then she moaned, softly
at first, then began to groan louder. Finally, totally exhausted, she
let out an almighty scream and shouted,

“OK, OK! I CAN’T park the f***** car! You do it, you SMUG bastard!”

 

 

James Bond’s 50th anniversary celebrated at Oscars

Published: Saturday, January 05, 2013  http://www.registercitizen.com/articles/2013/01/05/entertainment/doc50e78f3aead3d497850645.txt

LOS ANGELES (AP) — Oscar won’t be the only chiseled man in the spotlight at the 85th Academy Awards.
Telecast producers say the show will also feature a celebration of Bond, James Bond.
Producers Craig Zadan and Neil Meron announced Friday that the show will pay tribute to the 50th anniversary of the James Bond film franchise, which they describe as “the longest-running motion picture franchise in history and a beloved global phenomenon.”
The most recent Bond film, “Skyfall,” was released in November and has made more than $1 billion worldwide — a franchise record.

Nominations for this year’s Academy Awards will be announced Jan. 10. The Oscars will be presented Feb. 24 at the Dolby Theatre in Los Angeles.

For your eyes only: James Bond theme songs

Dust off your tuxedos and get your martini shakers ready, 007 fans: The film franchise is turning 50. It’s been a busy half-century for the superspy, who has been played by six different actors in no less than 22 films — with a 23rd, titled Skyfall, set for release on Nov. 9. With Adele’s “Skyfall” joining the ranks of James Bond’s most famous anthems, from “Goldfinger” to “Live and Let Die,” check out which other stars have tackled Bond theme songs over the years

Ever since James Bond first strolled onto the silver screen as viewed through an assassin’s gun barrel at the beginning of “Dr. No,” music has been a vital part of the 007 experience.  Join us for a look back at the music of James Bond and the stars who’ve sung his anthems

The first two James Bond movies didn’t have traditional “theme songs” like we associate with the movie franchise today. But the first Bond movie, 1967’s “Dr. No,” did feature the “James Bond Theme” as written by Monty Norman and performed by John Barry and his orchestra, a song that has been featured in all 23 films to this point. The opening credits to “Dr. No” also featured two other pieces of music: an untitled bongo interlude and a Calypso-flavored rendition of “Three Blind Mice,” titled “Kingston Calypso.”

The second James Bond movie, 1963’s “From Russia with Love,” featured a new instrumental version of the main theme over the opening credits and a vocal version by English singer Matt Monro at the end of the film.

One of the most memorable parts of 1964’s “Goldfinger” was the theme song of the same name sung by Welsh singer Shirley Bassey. It was the start of a tradition of having a standalone theme song for each film. The song also provide to be hugely popular, becoming a top 10 hit in the United States.

In 1965, Tom Jones provided the theme song for “Thunderball.” The song, composed by John Barry and Don Black, would reach No. 35 on the U.K. charts and No. 25 on the U.S. charts.

Nancy Sinatra was called upon for the theme song to 1967’s “You Only Live Twice.”

“On Her Majesty’s Secret Service” in 1969 featured a popular orchestral theme of the same name composed, once again, by John Barry, who was also responsible for composing 11 Bond soundtracks. The movie, George Lazenby’s first and only time out as James Bond, also featured a secondary theme, Louis Armstrong’s “We Have All the Time in the World.”

With Sean Connery returning for one final Bond film, Bassey also returned for a second time in 1971 for “Diamonds Are Forever,” singing the theme song of the same title. The song proved to not be as popular as “Goldfinger,” peaking only at No. 38 on the U.K. charts and No. 57 on the U.S. charts.

The James Bond franchise may have lost its star in Sean Connery with 1973’s “Live and Let Die,” with Roger Moore taking over the role, but it gained more star power in turning to Paul McCartney and Wings for the movie’s theme song. The song would become the first Bond theme song to be nominated for an Academy Award for Best Original Song and reached No. 2 as a U.S. single and No. 7 on the U.K. charts.

Scottish singer Lulu, mostly known for the song “To Sir, with Love” from the film of the same name, took over theme song duties for 1974’s “The Man with the Golden Gun.”

Carly Simon’s performance of Marvin Hamlisch’s (music) and Carole Bayer Sager’s (lyrics) “Nobody Does It Better” from 1977’s “The Spy Who Loved Me” received an Academy Award nomination for Best Song. The song not only matched McCartney’s Oscar nomination, but also the peak chart positions of his theme song, topping out at No. 2 as a U.S. single and No. 7 on the U.K. charts

Bassey returned for a third and final time for the theme song to 1979’s “Moonraker.”

Sheena Easton’s performance of Bill Conti’s “For Your Eyes Only” from the 1981 movie of the same name, was the third and last James Bond theme song, as of 2012, to earn an Academy Award nomination. The song also proved popular with music fans, reaching No. 8 as a U.K. single and climbing to No. 4 in the United States.

In 1983, Rita Coolidge took a turn providing a Bond theme song, singing “All Time High” for “Octopussy,” Moore’s last turn as the famous spy.

Duran Duran and John Barry’s “A View To A Kill” from the 1985 movie of the same name topped the singles charts in the United States, becoming the only Bond theme to hit No. 1 on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100 chart. The song nearly made it to the top in the United Kingdom as well, peaking at No. 2.

Two years after their 1985 debut with the No. 1 hit song “Take on Me,” Norwegian pop band A-ha sung the theme song for the 1987 James Bond movie “The Living Daylights.” While the song wasn’t released as a single in the U.S., it did make it to No. 5 in the United Kingdom.

While producers had favored contemporary pop stars throughout the 1980s, they turned to Gladys Knight for the theme song to 1989’s “Licence to Kill,” the last appearance of Timothy Dalton as James Bond.

When Pierce Brosnan took over for Dalton with 1995’s “GoldenEye,” Tina Turner, then seeing a career resurgence thanks to the biopic “What’s Love Got to Do with It,” tackled the movie’s theme song of the same name. The song, written by U2’s Bono and The Edge, would reach No. 10 on the U.K. charts.

In 1997, Sheryl Crow provided the theme song to “Tomorrow Never Dies.” While the song as not released as a single in the United States, it would reach No. 12 in the U.K.

Alternative rock band Garbage provided the theme song for 1999’s “The World Is Not Enough.”

In 2002, none other than pop star Madonna stepped up to sing the theme song to “Die Another Day.” The song, which she co-wrote with Paris-based record producer and songwriter Mirwais Ahmadzaï, was a smashing success, reaching No. 3 in the United Kingdom while topping out at No. 8 in the United States.

With Daniel Craig stepping into the role of James Bond in 2006’s “Casino Royale,” Chris Cornell, lead singer for hard rock bands Soundgarden and Audioslave, provided the movie’s theme song, “You Know My Name.” The song failed to impress in the United States, reaching only No. 79 on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100 chart, but peaked at No. 7 in the United Kingdom.

Jack White of the White Stripes and Alicia Keys teamed up for 2008’s “Another Way to Die,” the theme song to “Quantum of Solace.” The song, which was written and produced by White, was the first duet among the Bond theme songs.

British singing sensation Adele provided the theme song to the newest James Bond film, “Skyfall.” The song, written by Adele and producer Paul Epworth, was released on Oct. 5, 2012, at 0:07 British Summer Time as part of “Global James Bond Day,” celebrating the 50th anniversary of the release of “Dr. No.” The song entered the U.K. singles chart at No. 4 and rose to No. 2 in its second week, selling a total of 176,000 copies. It also entered the U.S. Billboard Hot 100 chart at No. 8, Adele’s first song to debut in the Top 10, selling 261,000 copies in the United States in its first three days.

 

 

The Most Outrageous Way to Share a Coke

 

 

Time to seek the truth about gun violence

Published: Monday, January 07, 2013 http://www.registercitizen.com/articles/2013/01/07/opinion/doc50ea57452da8f059827835.txt

In the wake of yet another mass shooting, it is appropriate to have a great national debate about guns and gun violence.
It would be nice to base that debate on something approximating facts. This, as it turns out, is not an easy thing.

The active tribes on the two major sides of the gun divide — gun rights and gun control — are robustly disproving the idea that while one is entitled to one’s own opinion, one is not entitled to one’s own set of facts.

For instance, a gun rights advocate, U.S. Rep. Louie Gohmert, R-Texas, asserted that legislating the right to carry a concealed weapon in public “every time” has resulted in a decline in crime rate.

A gun-control advocate, Dan Gross of the Brady Campaign, stated that gun violence rates have stayed constant, despite the proliferation of concealed-carry laws.

In a recent exploration of the gun-control debate, FactCheck.org took a look at some of the statements being marshaled by advocates on both sides. These include:

• The United States “has the highest rate of gun ownership in the world — by far.”

• The United States “has the highest rate of homicides among advanced countries.”

• But the “rate of gun murder is at its lowest point since at least 1981.”

• And, yet, “non-fatal gun injuries from assaults increased last year for the third straight year.”

• Still, “violent crimes committed with guns … have declined for three straight years.”

• Gun rights advocates frequently cite — pretty much as gospel — the work of economist John Lott, who asserts that “allowing citizens to carry concealed handguns reduces violent crime, and the reductions coincide very closely with the number of concealed-handgun permits issued.”

• But Lott’s work is “strongly disputed by numerous academics,” including a committee of the National Research Council of the National Academies, which found it was “impossible to draw strong conclusions” about causation between concealed-carry laws and crime data.

• There is a correlation between rates of gun ownership and rates of gun homicide, but no proven causation. That is to say, gun violence tends to occur more often where there is a higher rate of gun ownership, but it’s not clear that the latter is causing the former.

• There were 11,078 firearms homicides in the United States in 2010; that’s about 30 per day, which is three more than in Newtown, Conn., on Dec. 14.

• But the number of gun murders is declining, down to 11,078 in 2010, the lowest rate since at least 1981.

• Gun injuries, however, are climbing, with 55,544 non-fatal injuries in 2011, the second-highest rate since 2001.

• A widely cited study published in the New England Journal of Medicine found that gun possession in the home increased the risk of death — 2.7 times greater for homicide, 4.8 times greater for suicide.

OK, that’s enough.
Confused?
If you’re not, you’re not being honest.
If you are confused, there may be a reason for the lack of clarity.

According to an article published last week in the Washington Post, the National Rifle Association has successfully squashed government-funded research into the causes of gun-related violence.

The Post notes that the study of highway safety has been well-funded by the federal government and resulted in safety improvements and that gun deaths — at more than 31,000 annually, including suicides – now may have surpassed highway deaths in 2012.

Simply put, the NRA cannot have it both ways. It cannot simultaneously argue that guns make owners and society at large safer and, at the same, squash medical and social science inquiry that will either prove its case or debunk it.

We should not be afraid of the truth about guns. We should seek it.

As a first step toward having a national debate about guns and gun violence, the Obama administration should insist that peer-reviewed studies about guns and gun violence be adequately funded.

Editorial courtesy of The Daily Freeman, www.dailyfreeman.com.

Well OF BLOODY FECKING COURSE the NRA doesn’t want to participate in a government funded study!

Firstly its the BLOODY FECKING GOVERENMENT that wants to take away the guns!

Second, Government funded studies have a remarkable track record for producing the exact study results that fit the governments position have you ever notice that? Researchers are showing a little integrity and reporting data the government does want to hear? Not a problem! They just stop funding the study and call it flawed!

However it seems the NRA has seen the handwriting on the wall and has come to realize that they had better at least grab a chair at the Uncle Joe what can we successfully force down their throats w/o them turning their guns on us before we can relieve those citizens of those pesky Constructional assured arms and turn them into sheeple fit for tyrannical rule.

NRA will participate in White House gun violence meetings

Biden leading gun violence task force in response to Newtown shooting

Author: By Ted Metzger and Kevin Bohn CNN

Published On: Jan 08 2013 12:43:51 PM CST Updated On: Jan 08 2013 02:18:47 PM CST

WASHINGTON (CNN) –

A representative of the National Rifle Association will participate in a meeting this week with Vice President Joe Biden’s gun violence task force, a spokesman for the gun lobbyist said on Tuesday.

Spokesman Andrew Arulanandam said the group received an invitation on late Friday to participate and that “We are sending a rep to hear what they have to say.” The NRA said James J. Baker, the director of federal relations for NRA’s Institute of Legislative Action, would be representing the group at the White House.

Another major gun rights group, the National Shooting Sports Foundation (NSSF), will also participate in the meetings, which are slated for Wednesday and Thursday. The NSSF is based in Newtown, Connecticut, the site of last month’s deadly shooting at an elementary school that sparked the creation of Biden’s panel.

The NSSF said it welcomed the opportunity to become part of a “full national conversation” to protect children and communities from violence.

Days after the massacre in Newtown, President Barack Obama appointed Biden to lead the panel that will provide recommendations to prevent another mass shooting. The president gave the group a deadline of “no later than January.”

Jay Carney, the White House press secretary, said Tuesday that Biden’s panel was “engaging a variety of stakeholders – organizations and individuals — to look broadly at the problem of gun violence in America and to consider actions that could be taken at legislative level and elsewhere.”

While Obama himself said during an interview on “Meet the Press” that he was skeptical of the NRA’s proposal to put armed guards in schools, Carney said the president “doesn’t want to prejudge any recommendations that any stakeholder may present.”

A senior administration official said Tuesday that Biden would hold meetings this week with victims’ advocacy groups and gun safety organizations, as well as with groups representing gun owners. The official added the vice president would meet with representatives of the entertainment and video game industries.

Those meetings will result in a package of recommendations to be presented to Obama, the official said. The president will then announce which of those proposals he’ll push.

We can only pray for a miracle rarely seen in Washington in many a decade- open minds sitting down to intelligently and calmly discuss a growing social concern with the intent of coming up with a reason, workable solution that does not deprive us of another Constitutionally assured right.

WHOA! WTF am I saying? Next I’ll be leading you all in a round of Kumbaya!

Here’s come better advice go buy some 5 gallon buckets and a couple new hand guns with as much ammo as you can fit in the bucket with it. Have them leave the weapon in in the cosmoline rust preventative and moisture proof paper. Throw a disilicate pad (those little funny pouches you get with electronic that prevent moisture build up in storage in the box it comes in and then Saran or Shrink wrap the box. Put it in the bucket with the ammo and take it someplace safe a bury it after using a thin bead of silicone to ensure a waterproof seal of the lid on the bucket. Make sure you get the GPS co-ordinates for your cache along with some old fashion land make and foot pace ones incase the government decides to shut off GPS during times of unrest. Do the same thing with your assault rifle. You can buy premade containers for this purpose but the government will likely be looking for purchases of those so your local plumbing supply house can yield a length of PVC sewage or water piping suited to the job. an end cap a clean out cap some PVC pipe glue and a hacksaw is all you need to make a suitable container for caching a rifle long term. Don’t forget extra clips- you’ll be wanting high capacity clips as well and those will also be banned. DO NOT store them loaded however as this will kill the spring in the bottom of them and render them useless. Again your best results will be with a brand new weapon in the factory applied rust preventative taking the same steps as for the hand gun above.

 I suggest doing this as many times as you can afford to ideally along with reloading supplies, equipment charts and tables. If push comes to shove we’re going to need those weapons for the next American Revolution when WE THE PEOPLE reassert our control over the Government and re-establish our Republic and the Constitutionally Assured Rights of its People!

Speaking of which…

IF YOU ARE PRO SECOND AMENDMENT THIS MAY MAKE YOUR DAY!

Vermont State Rep. Fred Maslack has read the Second Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, as well as Vermont’s own Constitution very carefully, and his strict interpretation of these documents is popping some eyeballs in New England and elsewhere.

Maslack recently proposed a bill to register “non-gun-owners” and require them to pay a $500 fee to the state. Thus Vermont would become the first state to require a permit for the luxury of going about unarmed and assess a fee of $500 for the privilege of not owning a gun. Maslack read the “militia” phrase of the Second Amendment as not only the right of the individual citizen to bear arms, but as ‘a clear mandate to do so’. He believes that universal gun ownership was advocated by the Framers of the Constitution as an antidote to a “monopoly of force” by the government as well as criminals. Vermont’s constitution states explicitly that “the people have a right to bear arms for the defense of themselves and the State” and those persons who are “conscientiously scrupulous of bearing arms” shall be required to “pay such equivalent..”

>>The remainder of this article has been truncated.<<

[Since Impish saw fit to use it before this could post. BAD IMPISH!]

Find it here for review/rereading: https://dragonlaffs.com/2013/01/09/dragon-laffs-1306/

I LIKE IT!!! Lets see how all the liberals like having to pay for their Second Amendment stance the same way we ahve to pay for owning a gun. ‘Gun Free Zones’! Maybe we should charge for a zoning permit or something for those‘Gun Free Zones’ as well to help offset the inherent cost of their requiring increased police protection.

Personally I’m in favor of the approach that several towns in the US have taken as well as Sweden. Every house has to have a gun and be trained in its proper use and safety. Liberal gun haters will never stand for that? We’ll we’ll just issue them one of these California approved gun safes then if they register their objections.

That way they met the legal requirement every home have a handgun, (which also at the same time appeases the Pro Second Amendment faction) yet preserve their liberal anti gun guns are inherently evil ideology by making it nearly impossible to access and still allow home intruders the relative safety and peace of mind that committing crimes in gun free areas affords them. Assault weapons? Treat them in a similar manner. A truly win/win/win/win All American “Art of the Deal” Political Compromise where all interested parties & lobbies get something but nobody get it entirely their way. In addition you lock this law in place for say 25 years so that this solution has an opportunity to generate some meaningful longer term data which makes it much harder to spin.

Good Morning Campers and welcome to Saturday!

This is a really old joke, but is a GREAT example of the situation we are in today…

 

 

 

 

 

George Bush, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell.
While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil
tells them it is for calling back to Earth.
Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he is finished the
devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a
check.
Next Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes. When she is
finished the devil informs her that the cost is 6 million dollars, so she
writes him a check.
Finally George Bush gets his turn and talks for 4 hours. When he is
finished, the devil informs him that the cost is $5.00.
When Putin hears this he goes ballistic and asks the devil why Bush got to
call the USA so cheaply.

The devil smiles and replies, “Since Obama took over, the country has gone
to hell, so it’s a local call.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Okay, this next one is just wrong!  JUST WRONG!!!

Now, I’m not crazy about Green Dragons either, but I am equally not crazy about Red Dragons.  Green ones are just so snobby that they aren’t welcome at ANY of the Barbeques, they want…no, DEMAND that their virgin sacrifices are brought to them on a silver platter.  and the RED ones, geez, they’re just mean.  They raze villages just for the heck of it.  Now…us Blue Dragons.  Well, we like our virgins, but we don’t often eat them, at least  not in the traditional sense.  We like our fires, too…but normally we prefer the ones needed for a hog roast.  We can be assholes, we just prefer not to be.  Ah, well.  Let’s move on.

Some of you may remember me mentioning my old pal Wheats…some of you may remember some of his scathing essays and rants.  Well, he’s expanded to a little minor photoshoppery, but the words are still worth a million.
Thanks Wheats!

The Tonight Show With Jay Leno

• The mayor of Los Angeles, Antonio Villaraigosa, was seen partying in Mexico with Charlie Sheen. I believe that celebration is called “Cinco de Career-o.”
• The mayor is denying it. He said he only saw Charlie for a minute, but Charlie said he and the mayor had a wild time in Mexico partying with a number of hot women. Who are you going to believe — a party boy who has never done anything in his life or Charlie Sheen?

Conan

• The Consumer Electronics Show is happening in Las Vegas and the most amazing gadgets are being talked about. One of the gadgets this year is a fork that tells you when you’re eating too fast. In a related story today, Chris Christie was spotted yelling at his fork to mind its own business.
• Chris Christie said to his fork, “Shut up or I’m going to switch to my friend — spoon.”
• It’s being reported that Apple may be making a less-expensive version of their iPhone. They’re calling it a Samsung.

Late Night With Jimmy Fallon

• The White House announced that the theme for President Obama’s inauguration will be “Faith in America’s Future.” Which is proof that no one in the White House has ever seen “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.”
• President Obama’s team is promising special perks for donors who give at least a million dollars to the inauguration. Which is cool, but you know what else can get you a lot of perks? Keeping that million dollars.
• Today, the president hosted a screening of NBC’s White House comedy, “1600 Penn,” which centers on a goofy guy who keeps embarrassing the White House. Or as Joe Biden put it, “Why’s everyone looking at me?”

Conan

• New Jersey Democrats say Republican Governor Chris Christie will be impossible to beat. It’s unclear if they’re talking about the 2013 governor’s race or Coney Island hot dog-eating contest.
• Last night the Spice Girls musical debuted in London. So it turns out the Mayans were off by just a few weeks
• According to the Census Bureau, white people will not be the majority in the United States by the year 2043. So this is even more bad news for the National Hockey League.
• Scientists say that they have found evidence of cheese being made 7,500 years ago. The evidence was found in a 7-Eleven nacho bar.

 

Thanks to Kiz for this next one.  Really cute

How Star Trek Should Have Ended…

A gas station owner was trying to increase his sales. So he put up a sign that read,

“Free Sex with Fill-Up.”

Soon a local redneck pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex.

 

The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10. If he guessed correctly he would get his free sex.

The redneck guessed 8, and the proprietor said, “You were close. The number was 7.Sorry. No sex this time.”

A week later, the same redneck, along with his brother, Bubba, pulled in for another fill-up.

Again he asked for his free sex.

The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess the correct number.

The redneck guessed 2 this time.

The proprietor said, “Sorry, it was 3. You were close, but no free sex this time.”

As they were driving away, the redneck said to his brother, “I think that game is rigged, and he doesn’t really give away free sex.”

Bubba replied, “No it ain’t, Billy Ray. It ain’t rigged.    My wife won twice last week.

Hello again campers.  My Last Word today was going to be about my surgery on Monday, but after having finished the rest of this, my pain level is way too high and I must call it a night.
So, I’m going to end this here and try and do a short bit about my surgery sometime prior to Monday.  May you all be well and have a great weekend.

Cheers, my friends

Impish Dragon

Good Morning Campers!  Welcome to the New Year!
I hope you all had a wonderful New Year and hope that the start has been everything you expected and more.  Hopefully all of you made it home from your parties and what not. 
This issue was supposed to be put out on Saturday, but for reasons I’m sure Lethal explained, I was unable to complete it on time.  I actually finished this off last night and am going to try to get another issue ready for Saturday, but if that’s not possible, I’m sure my brother Lethal will cover for me again.  That’s what partners do.
Monday I go in for Knee surgery and I found out today that I will be in hospital for anywhere from 1 to 3 days.  It’s going to depend on what they have to do, how I handle it and how I recover.
So, Monday Jan 14th at about 1300 hrs Eastern Time, stop and say a little prayer for the dragon for a successful surgery, a partial instead of a full knee replacement and a comfortable and full recovery. 

In the mean time, I think it’s about time to get your laff on!

I just got off the phone with a friend who lives in Wisconsin. He said that since early this morning, the snow has been nearly waist high and is still falling. The temperature is dropping near zero and the north wind is increasing to gale force.

His wife has done nothing all day but look through the kitchen window and just stare.

He says that if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in.

Just wanted to let you know – today I received my Fiscal Cliff Survival Pack from the White House.  It contained a parachute, an ‘Obama Hope & Change’ bumper sticker, a ‘Bush’s Fault’ poster, a ‘Blame Boehner’ poster, a ‘Tax the Rich’ poster, an application for unemployment, an application for food stamps, a prayer rug, a letter of assignation of debt to my grandchildren and a machine to blow smoke up my ass. All directions were in Spanish. Keep an eye out. Yours should arrive soon.

Thanks to Dad for this one….

Next…. A bevy of blonde jokes… (yeah, I really did go there…)

       DISNEYLAND
Two blondes were going to Disneyland. 
They were driving on the Interstate when they saw the sign that said Disneyland LEFT.
They started crying and turned around and  went home.

      FLORIDA  OR  MOON
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were  sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the  other, ‘Which do you think is farther away… Florida or the  moon?’
The other blonde turns and says ‘Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida  ?????’

       CAR TROUBLE
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas  station. She tells the  mechanic it died.
After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
She says, ‘What’s the  story?’
He replies, ‘Just crap in the  carburetor’
She asks, ‘How often do I have to do  that?’

     SPEEDING  TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for  speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her  license.
She replied in a huff, ‘I wish you guys would get your act together.
Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to  you!’

     RIVER  WALK
There’s this blonde out for a walk. She  comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank  ‘Yoo-hoo!’ she shouts, ‘How can I get to the other  side?’
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back,  ‘You ARE on the other  side.’

     AT THE DOCTOR’S OFFICE (my favorite)
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the  doctor’s office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
‘Impossible!’ says the doctor.. ‘Show  me.’
The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed  even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed  her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her  scream.
   The doctor said, ‘You’re not really a  redhead, are you?
‘Well, no’ she said, ‘I’m actually a  blonde.’
   ‘I thought so,’ the doctor said, ‘Your  finger is  broken.’

     KNITTING
   A highway patrolman pulled alongside a  speeding car on the freeway.
   Glancing at the car, he was astounded  to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window,  turned on his bullhorn and yelled,  ‘PULL OVER!’
   ‘NO!’ the blonde yelled back, ‘IT’S A  SCARF!’

      BLONDE ON THE  SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, ‘We were the first in space!’
The American said, ‘We were the first on  the moon!’
The Blonde said, ‘So what? We’re going to  be the first on the sun!’
The Russian and the American looked at  each other and shook their  heads.
‘You can’t land on the sun, you idiot!  You’ll burn up!’ said the  Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, ‘We’re not  stupid, you know. We’re going at night!’
    
      IN A  VACUUM
   A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one  night… It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature.
   Her question was, ‘If you are in a vacuum  and someone calls your name, can you hear it?’
   She thought for a  time and then asked, ‘Is it on or  off?’

           FINALLY,
THE  BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE  JOKES!
   A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who  had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. 
   The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one  was named Timex.
   Her friend said, ‘Whoever heard of someone naming  dogs like that?’
   ‘HELLLOOOOOOO……,’ answered the blonde. ‘They’re watch  dogs.’


After all those blonde jokes, this one may very apply to your old buddy Impish very soon…

Yeah, well, the guy in this next picture is in a hell of a lot more trouble than I am…

Okay, this is definitely going on next years Christmas list!!!!
Lenovo to release giant 27-inch tablet PC; stands up as a regular PC, lies flat as tablet

Jan. 7, 2013: The Lenovo IdeaCentre Horizon Table PC — which the company calls the first “interpersonal computer.” It’s a PC the size of a coffee table that works like a gigantic tablet and lets four people use it at once. (AP PHOTO/LENOVO)

LAS VEGAS –  Dismayed that family members are spread out over the house, each with a separate PC or tablet? Lenovo has something it believes will get them back together: a PC the size of a coffee table that works like a gigantic tablet and lets four people use it at once.

Lenovo Group Ltd., one of the world’s largest PC makers, is calling the IdeaCentre Horizon Table PC the first “interpersonal computer” — as opposed to a “personal computer.”

At first glance, it looks like a regular all-in-one machine in the vein of the iMac: It’s a 27-inch screen with the innards of a Windows 8 computer built into it, and it can stand up on a table.

Read the rest of the story here.

To my military brothers, can I get an AMEN!!

This has got to be THE greatest question of all time!!!

The ONLY time a “like” would save a life…

The devastation and ignorance being caused by this catastrophic occurrence will forever destroy the fiber and character of a once great nation with little hope for correction or rebuilding at the present rate of duplicity and complacence being displayed by the American public.

Amazing how something with no vulgarity can be one of the most powerful messages about the Obama team that I have seen to date!

NOT RACIST…NOT VIOLENT…JUST NOT SILENT ANY MORE!

If these stats are correct, this should scare the shit out of a lot of folks. PLUS they have some of the most restrictive gun laws in the U.S. Wow, is Illinois and Chicago great or what?
Perhaps the U.S. should pull out of Chicago?
Body count: In the last six months 292 killed (murdered) in Chicago.
221 killed in Iraq AND Chicago has one of the strictest gun laws in the entire US.

PRESIDENT: Barack Hussein Obama
Senator: Dick Durbin
House Representative: Jesse Jackson Jr.
Governor: Pat Quinn
House leader: Mike Madigan
Atty. Gen.: Lisa Madigan (daughter of Mike)
Mayor: Rahm Emanuel

The leadership in Illinois – all Democrats.
Thank you for the combat zone in Chicago .
Of course, they’re all blaming each other.
Can’t blame Republicans; there aren’t any!

Chicago school system rated one of the worst in the country.
Can’t blame Republicans; there aren’t any!

State pension fund $78 Billion in debt, worst in country.
Can’t blame Republicans; there aren’t any!

Cook County ( Chicago ) sales tax 10.25% highest in country.
Can’t blame Republicans; there aren’t any!

This is the political culture that Obama comes from in Illinois.
And he is going to ‘fix’ Washington politics for us???

George Ryan is no longer Governor, he is in the big house.  Of course he was replaced by Rob Blajegovitch who is…that’s right, also in the big house.  And Representative Jesse Jackson Jr. resigned a couple of weeks ago.  That is because he is fighting being sent to…that’s right, the big house.

The Land of Lincoln, where our governors make our license plates.

But you know what?  As long as they keep providing entitlements to the population of Chicago, nothing is going to change, except the state will go broke before the country does.

Now, let’s look at where we are heading… we’re just a couple years behind Australia. 

I hope you have cleaned your guns this month and put them in a secure place you can access quickly.

Hunting season is now open.

Australian Gun Law Update ——–
Here’s a thought to warm some of your hearts….
From: Ed Chenel, A police officer in Australia
Hi Yanks, I thought you all would like to see the real figures from Down Under.
It has now been 12 months since gun owners in Australia were forced by a new law to surrender 640,381 personal firearms to be destroyed by our own government, a program costing Australia taxpayers more than $500 million dollars.

The first year results are now in:
Australia-wide, homicides are up 6.2 percent,
Australia-wide, assaults are up 9.6 percent;
Australia-wide, armed robberies are up 44 percent (yes, 44 percent)!
In the state of Victoria alone, homicides with firearms are now up 300 percent.(Note that
while the law-abiding citizens turned them in, the criminals did not and criminals still possess their guns!)

While figures over the previous 25 years showed a steady
decrease in armed robbery with firearms, this has changed drastically upward in the past 12 months, since the criminals now are guaranteed that their prey is unarmed.
There has also been a dramatic increase in break-ins and assaults of the elderly, while the resident is at home.
Australian politicians are at a loss to explain how public safety has decreased, after such monumental effort and expense was expended in ‘successfully ridding Australian society of guns….’ You won’t see this on the American evening news or hear your governor or
members of the State Assembly disseminating this information because they are to biased and liberal motivated to report the truth when it conflicts with their beliefs .

The Australian experience speaks for itself. Guns in the hands of honest citizens save lives and property and, yes, gun-control laws affect only the law-abiding citizens.

Take note Americans, before it’s too late!

Or you Will be one of the sheep to turn yours in?

One of my all time favorite cartoons.  Came out right after 9-11, but is still very appropriate today…

and now finally, what may be the hope (possibly the ONLY hope) for the country:

Vermont State Rep. Fred Maslack has read the Second Amendment to the U.S.
Constitution, as well as Vermont ‘s own Constitution very carefully, and
his strict interpretation of these documents is popping some eyeballs in New
England and elsewhere.

Maslack recently proposed a bill to register “non-gun-owners” and require
them to pay a $500 fee to the state.
Thus Vermont would become the first state to require a permit for the luxury of going about unarmed and assess a
fee of $500 for the privilege of not owning a gun

Maslack read the “militia” phrase of the Second Amendment as not only affirming the right of the individual citizen to bear arms, but as a clear
mandate to do so.
He believes that universal gun ownership was advocated by the Framers of the Constitution as an antidote to a “monopoly of force” by
the government as well as criminals

Vermont ‘s constitution states explicitly that “the people have a right to bear arms for the defense of themselves and the State” and those persons
who are “conscientiously scrupulous of bearing arms” shall be required to “pay such equivalent.” Clearly, says Maslack, Vermonters have a
constitutional obligation to arm themselves, so that they are capable of responding to “any situation that may arise.”

Under the bill, adults who choose not to own a firearm would be required
to register their name, address, Social Security Number, and driver’s
license number with the state.
“There is a legitimate government interest in knowing who is not prepared to defend the state should they be asked to do
so,” Maslack says

Vermont already boasts a high rate of gun ownership along with the least
restrictive laws of any state ..
it’s currently the only state that allows a citizen to carry a concealed firearm without a permit.
This combination of plenty of guns and few laws regulating them has resulted in a crime rate
that is the third lowest in the nation

“America is at that awkward stage.
It’s too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the b*******.”

This makes sense!
There is no reason why gun owners should have to pay taxes to support police protection for people not wanting to own guns.
Let them contribute their fair share and pay their own way.

Having read the 2nd amendment several times…. A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed. … and the fact that it really isn’t that hard to understand, Rep Maslack makes some excellent suggestions.  I think it would be an excellent idea to charge non-gun owners for the defense of their property and families by other people and the police.

What do you think?

        

Lethal here with a personal plea for help!

Please join operation Go Green- Save A Leprechaun NOW. The Leprechaun’s life you help save WILL be mine!

Things have been getting more and more tense here as the Cotton Bowl drew closer over the last week. Yesterday Molly spent all day watching pregame hype shows..shows slanted towards Alabama & their Crimson Tide I might add and giving me ever increasingly sharp looks. At the same time she was busily surfing all the college football site and consulting numerous football apps on her iPhone.

That led her to three discoveries that that raised my threat level to it’s highest setting ‘run and hide until it blows over & the wife comes down’. More in a moment on why that’s no longer quite the option it was when I got up yesterday morning, first her discoveries.

1. Notre Dame is favored, and by more than a touchdown, 10 points in fact as Impish mentioned earlier.
2. Manti Te’o arguably Norte Dames best player this year who was in the running for the Heisman Trophy and IMO got robbed (the dude suffered twin serious personal losses this season losing his beloved grandmother the family matriarch and his girl friend with in six hours of each other but still played an amazing season under that pressure) isn’t even Catholic. He is in fact a devout Mormon. Given that when you say “Catholic College’ like the first one the pops to mind is Notre Dame this led Molly to make accusations of unreasonable recruiting and ‘packing the team’.
3. As if that wasn’t bad enough, she discovered the following trash talking Fighting Irish t-shirts aimed at Alabama.

Notre Dame Begins BCS National Championship Trash Talk With ‘Catholics vs. Cousins’ T-Shirt

Dec 3rd, 2012 at 7:20 pm by Josh Sanchez

The Notre Dame Fighting Irish will be looking to win their twelfth national championship in school history and the first since 1988 when they meet the Alabama Crimson Tide in Miami for the BCS National Championship.

The game is set to take place on January 7th, 2013 at  Sun Life Stadium in Miami Gardens, Florida, but the trash talk has already begun with some Notre Dame t-shirts that have surfaced.

In a t-shirt that reads “From South Bend to South Beach” the Notre Dame faithful coin the game “Catholics vs. Cousins.” Ouch. We don’t need to get into why the t-shirt is offensive to those from Alabama and the Crimson Tide faithful, but you know we have to show off the t-shirt that will surely get ‘Bama fans fired up.

Here is the shirt that brings us our first bit of trash talk for the BCS National Championship:

Notre Dame Takes Another Shot At Alabama With Pre-Championship Trash Talk T-Shirt

Dec 26th, 2012 at 8:55 pm by Josh Sanchez

While we wait in anticipation for the BCS National Championship game between the top-ranked Notre Dame Fighting Irish and the No. 2 Alabama Crimson Tide, the pre-game trash talk has been presented through the apparel for each side.

We already touched on the very popular “Catholics vs. Cousins” t-shirt from Notre Dame, but the Fighting Irish faithful have unveiled yet another t-shirt that gets even dirtier than the last.

It’s hard to imagine that the trash talk could get nastier with the game still over a week away, but it has done just that. Here is the latest unauthorized trash talking tee for the Notre Dame faithful:

I tried to point out that Alabama had almost immediately fired back with its own trash talk tee. I even conceded that there was no small amount of truth in the Crimson Tides trash talk. This got me only a baleful stare that caused frost to start forming on the walls.

Alabama Crimson Tide Answer Irish Talk Trash for National Championship Game

Dec 7th, 2012 at 4:29 pm by Josh Hill

Earlier this month, the Notre Dame Irish fired the first shots in the war of words leading up to January 7th’s Nation Championship game against the Alabama Crimson Tide. After a few days of letting the burn rub in, the Tide have answered back with a trash talk T-shirt of their own, not addressing the Catholics vs. Cousins shot, but rather exclaiming that they’d rather be good than lucky.

At this point I decided discretion being the better part of valor that it was time for a tactical withdrawal to warmer and safer climes. I waited until Molly was in the shower to attempt to sneak out only to receive a text message from my flight crew that they had just landed in Alabama per Molly’s instructions and been rather forcibly removed from the plane. After firing them for being dumb enough to fly a clearly Irish favoring aircraft into Crimson Tide territory on the eave of the Cotton Bowl I realized I was screwed. All my money passports fake identities, even the Lethal Limo were all loaded on that plane and set incase I had to make a hasty departure to keep my hide and life together. Molly apparently had anticipated this tactic on my part and neatly out maneuvered me.

So loyal readers I’m appealing to you for help. If things start looking bad for me ( Notre Dame is up by more than 10 at the half) I’m going to go outside to watch for the pizza dude. I’m playing for the pizza and leaving with the pizza dude to grab my go bag I’ve already stores at the place place and then a cab down the road.

IF you want to help me  I’ll need a bunch one places to spend a single night, or in the event of blizzards (Molly hates the cold and snow) perhaps a couple nights. If you ahve a guest room, spare bed semi comfy couch or even a heated garage/attic and an air mattress plus can show financial statements proving the large sum of money Molly will undoubtedly stoop to offering for my capture is of no real interest to you, and finally you’re not a liberal or Democrat please respond to the address on my business card below.

In return I’ll cook dinner, treat you to a pot of brown gold the next morning, tell a few Irish stories and as soon as I reach a safe place send you a certificate suitable for framing including a signed picture of us to prove that yes indeed the Lethal Leprechaun has indeed slept here. If you are female single reasonable good looking and of legal age but not yet of retirement age, certain other potential benefits of my visiting you can certainly be discussed. Guys you’ll have to settle for a night of  Poker, Irish Whiskey, Guinness and good cigars as the Leprechaun stays as far away from Brokeback Mountain as he possibly can.

Remember! The Leprechaun’s life you help save will be my own!

Notre Dame vs. Alabama should be a slugfest

ONE GAME LEFT FOR ALL THE MARBLES.

History began in 1973 with the first Sugar Bowl.

All of us who watch college ball know the importance of tonight’s game, but for one of us, there is much more riding on this game!  Our good friend, fellow camper, and short green leprechaun, Lethal is currently in a lose-lose-lose position.  You see, he (as you may have guessed) is a huge Notre Dame Fighting Irish fan.  No huge surprise there, right?  But, what you may not know is that his dear, sweet (very dangerous and sometimes scary) wife Molly is just as huge an Alabama fan. 

Now, the fact Notre Dame is favored by about 10 points (depending upon which betting website you go to) only makes Lethal’s predicament more dire.  If Notre Dame wins he’ll have to put up with Molly’s anger.  If Alabama wins, he’ll have to put up with Molly’s rubbing his nose in it and finally, if it were to end in a tie (were that even possible) he would have to face her frustration.

I guess the best situation would be for N.D. to win, but not beat the spread, in which case both Lethal and Molly would have something to be happy about or upset about, depending on how you look at it.

Why am I bringing any of this up?  Well, just in case you don’t hear from Lethal anytime soon, you’ll understand why.  He may be running, or in hiding or…heaven forbid … six feet under.

Stay tuned for more…

Impish Dragon