Good Morning Campers! Welcome to the New Year!
I hope you all had a wonderful New Year and hope that the start has been everything you expected and more. Hopefully all of you made it home from your parties and what not.
This issue was supposed to be put out on Saturday, but for reasons I’m sure Lethal explained, I was unable to complete it on time. I actually finished this off last night and am going to try to get another issue ready for Saturday, but if that’s not possible, I’m sure my brother Lethal will cover for me again. That’s what partners do.
Monday I go in for Knee surgery and I found out today that I will be in hospital for anywhere from 1 to 3 days. It’s going to depend on what they have to do, how I handle it and how I recover.
So, Monday Jan 14th at about 1300 hrs Eastern Time, stop and say a little prayer for the dragon for a successful surgery, a partial instead of a full knee replacement and a comfortable and full recovery.
In the mean time, I think it’s about time to get your laff on!
I just got off the phone with a friend who lives in Wisconsin. He said that since early this morning, the snow has been nearly waist high and is still falling. The temperature is dropping near zero and the north wind is increasing to gale force.
His wife has done nothing all day but look through the kitchen window and just stare.
He says that if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in.
Just wanted to let you know – today I received my Fiscal Cliff Survival Pack from the White House. It contained a parachute, an ‘Obama Hope & Change’ bumper sticker, a ‘Bush’s Fault’ poster, a ‘Blame Boehner’ poster, a ‘Tax the Rich’ poster, an application for unemployment, an application for food stamps, a prayer rug, a letter of assignation of debt to my grandchildren and a machine to blow smoke up my ass. All directions were in Spanish. Keep an eye out. Yours should arrive soon.
Thanks to Dad for this one….
Next…. A bevy of blonde jokes… (yeah, I really did go there…)
Two blondes were going to Disneyland.
They were driving on the Interstate when they saw the sign that said Disneyland LEFT.
They started crying and turned around and went home.
FLORIDA OR MOON
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, ‘Which do you think is farther away… Florida or the moon?’
The other blonde turns and says ‘Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?????’
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.
After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
She says, ‘What’s the story?’
He replies, ‘Just crap in the carburetor’
She asks, ‘How often do I have to do that?’
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, ‘I wish you guys would get your act together.
Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!’
There’s this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank ‘Yoo-hoo!’ she shouts, ‘How can I get to the other side?’
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, ‘You ARE on the other side.’
AT THE DOCTOR’S OFFICE (my favorite)
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor’s office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
‘Impossible!’ says the doctor.. ‘Show me.’
The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.
The doctor said, ‘You’re not really a redhead, are you?
‘Well, no’ she said, ‘I’m actually a blonde.’
‘I thought so,’ the doctor said, ‘Your finger is broken.’
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, ‘PULL OVER!’
‘NO!’ the blonde yelled back, ‘IT’S A SCARF!’
BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, ‘We were the first in space!’
The American said, ‘We were the first on the moon!’
The Blonde said, ‘So what? We’re going to be the first on the sun!’
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.
‘You can’t land on the sun, you idiot! You’ll burn up!’ said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, ‘We’re not stupid, you know. We’re going at night!’
IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night… It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature.
Her question was, ‘If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?’
She thought for a time and then asked, ‘Is it on or off?’
THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.
Her friend said, ‘Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?’
‘HELLLOOOOOOO……,’ answered the blonde. ‘They’re watch dogs.’
After all those blonde jokes, this one may very apply to your old buddy Impish very soon…
Yeah, well, the guy in this next picture is in a hell of a lot more trouble than I am…
Okay, this is definitely going on next years Christmas list!!!!
Lenovo to release giant 27-inch tablet PC; stands up as a regular PC, lies flat as tablet
Jan. 7, 2013: The Lenovo IdeaCentre Horizon Table PC — which the company calls the first “interpersonal computer.” It’s a PC the size of a coffee table that works like a gigantic tablet and lets four people use it at once. (AP PHOTO/LENOVO)
LAS VEGAS – Dismayed that family members are spread out over the house, each with a separate PC or tablet? Lenovo has something it believes will get them back together: a PC the size of a coffee table that works like a gigantic tablet and lets four people use it at once.
Lenovo Group Ltd., one of the world’s largest PC makers, is calling the IdeaCentre Horizon Table PC the first “interpersonal computer” — as opposed to a “personal computer.”
At first glance, it looks like a regular all-in-one machine in the vein of the iMac: It’s a 27-inch screen with the innards of a Windows 8 computer built into it, and it can stand up on a table.
Read the rest of the story here.
To my military brothers, can I get an AMEN!!
This has got to be THE greatest question of all time!!!
The devastation and ignorance being caused by this catastrophic occurrence will forever destroy the fiber and character of a once great nation with little hope for correction or rebuilding at the present rate of duplicity and complacence being displayed by the American public.
I don’t know who came up with the idea for this drawing, but it is GREAT!
Amazing how something with no vulgarity can be one of the most powerful messages about the Obama team that I have seen to date!
NOT RACIST…NOT VIOLENT…JUST NOT SILENT ANY MORE!
If these stats are correct, this should scare the shit out of a lot of folks. PLUS they have some of the most restrictive gun laws in the U.S. Wow, is Illinois and Chicago great or what?
Perhaps the U.S. should pull out of Chicago?
Body count: In the last six months 292 killed (murdered) in Chicago.
221 killed in Iraq AND Chicago has one of the strictest gun laws in the entire US.
PRESIDENT: Barack Hussein Obama
Senator: Dick Durbin
House Representative: Jesse Jackson Jr.
Governor: Pat Quinn
House leader: Mike Madigan
Atty. Gen.: Lisa Madigan (daughter of Mike)
Mayor: Rahm Emanuel
The leadership in Illinois – all Democrats.
Thank you for the combat zone in Chicago .
Of course, they’re all blaming each other.
Can’t blame Republicans; there aren’t any!
Chicago school system rated one of the worst in the country.
Can’t blame Republicans; there aren’t any!
State pension fund $78 Billion in debt, worst in country.
Can’t blame Republicans; there aren’t any!
Cook County ( Chicago ) sales tax 10.25% highest in country.
Can’t blame Republicans; there aren’t any!
This is the political culture that Obama comes from in Illinois.
And he is going to ‘fix’ Washington politics for us???
George Ryan is no longer Governor, he is in the big house. Of course he was replaced by Rob Blajegovitch who is…that’s right, also in the big house. And Representative Jesse Jackson Jr. resigned a couple of weeks ago. That is because he is fighting being sent to…that’s right, the big house.
The Land of Lincoln, where our governors make our license plates.
But you know what? As long as they keep providing entitlements to the population of Chicago, nothing is going to change, except the state will go broke before the country does.
I hope you have cleaned your guns this month and put them in a secure place you can access quickly.
Hunting season is now open.
Australian Gun Law Update ——–
Here’s a thought to warm some of your hearts….
From: Ed Chenel, A police officer in Australia
Hi Yanks, I thought you all would like to see the real figures from Down Under.
It has now been 12 months since gun owners in Australia were forced by a new law to surrender 640,381 personal firearms to be destroyed by our own government, a program costing Australia taxpayers more than $500 million dollars.
The first year results are now in:
Australia-wide, homicides are up 6.2 percent,
Australia-wide, assaults are up 9.6 percent;
Australia-wide, armed robberies are up 44 percent (yes, 44 percent)!
In the state of Victoria alone, homicides with firearms are now up 300 percent.(Note that
while the law-abiding citizens turned them in, the criminals did not and criminals still possess their guns!)
While figures over the previous 25 years showed a steady
decrease in armed robbery with firearms, this has changed drastically upward in the past 12 months, since the criminals now are guaranteed that their prey is unarmed.
There has also been a dramatic increase in break-ins and assaults of the elderly, while the resident is at home.
Australian politicians are at a loss to explain how public safety has decreased, after such monumental effort and expense was expended in ‘successfully ridding Australian society of guns….’ You won’t see this on the American evening news or hear your governor or
members of the State Assembly disseminating this information because they are to biased and liberal motivated to report the truth when it conflicts with their beliefs .
The Australian experience speaks for itself. Guns in the hands of honest citizens save lives and property and, yes, gun-control laws affect only the law-abiding citizens.
Take note Americans, before it’s too late!
Or you Will be one of the sheep to turn yours in?
A Novel Idea. Register non-gun owners
Vermont State Rep. Fred Maslack has read the Second Amendment to the U.S.
Constitution, as well as Vermont ‘s own Constitution very carefully, and
his strict interpretation of these documents is popping some eyeballs in New
England and elsewhere.
Maslack recently proposed a bill to register “non-gun-owners” and require
them to pay a $500 fee to the state.
Thus Vermont would become the first state to require a permit for the luxury of going about unarmed and assess a
fee of $500 for the privilege of not owning a gun
Maslack read the “militia” phrase of the Second Amendment as not only affirming the right of the individual citizen to bear arms, but as a clear
mandate to do so.
He believes that universal gun ownership was advocated by the Framers of the Constitution as an antidote to a “monopoly of force” by
the government as well as criminals
Vermont ‘s constitution states explicitly that “the people have a right to bear arms for the defense of themselves and the State” and those persons
who are “conscientiously scrupulous of bearing arms” shall be required to “pay such equivalent.” Clearly, says Maslack, Vermonters have a
constitutional obligation to arm themselves, so that they are capable of responding to “any situation that may arise.”
Under the bill, adults who choose not to own a firearm would be required
to register their name, address, Social Security Number, and driver’s
license number with the state.
“There is a legitimate government interest in knowing who is not prepared to defend the state should they be asked to do
so,” Maslack says
Vermont already boasts a high rate of gun ownership along with the least
restrictive laws of any state ..
it’s currently the only state that allows a citizen to carry a concealed firearm without a permit.
This combination of plenty of guns and few laws regulating them has resulted in a crime rate
that is the third lowest in the nation
“America is at that awkward stage.
It’s too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the b*******.”
This makes sense!
There is no reason why gun owners should have to pay taxes to support police protection for people not wanting to own guns.
Let them contribute their fair share and pay their own way.
Having read the 2nd amendment several times…. A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed. … and the fact that it really isn’t that hard to understand, Rep Maslack makes some excellent suggestions. I think it would be an excellent idea to charge non-gun owners for the defense of their property and families by other people and the police.