So, here it is the weekend, again, already. Boy, time sure does fly when you’re … now, how does the rest of that go? Oh yeah! When you’re working your butt off!
It’s been one of those weeks, campers. Wednesday was especially fun with an exercise in one county that lasted ALL DAY LONG followed by a county meeting in a different county that same night.
It didn’t help that there was road work on every single major highway that I had to drive on between said counties.
And it was cold and windy out.
And Thursday morning we were under a FROST ADVISORY!!!!
Did someone forget to tell Mother Nature that it’s SPRING!!! Stephanie, I’m assigning that task to you. You are both women of … um … a certain temper. So, it’s a natural fit. Thanks!
So, now before I get in any more trouble,
Aussie Pete sent me an MP4 of a lady playing two pianos at the same time and I thought it was way cool! The problem is that I can’t use MP4s. BUT I found it on YouTube! And here it is!
Right? Pretty cool.
Here’s another video for you, this one from Joe from NJ
If I got a dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.
My imitation of Mother Nature.
She’s right behind me, isn’t she?
Daniel Emlyn-Jones, 49, grew the gympie-gympie plant at home but has put it in a cage with a sign that says “Danger”.
The shrub — also known as the “Australian Stinging Tree” is a nettle-like plant capable of delivering a sting that feels like “being burnt with hot acid and electrocuted at the same time.”
It is known as the world’s most venomous plant.
Daniel, an online science tutor, said that he wants to promote an interest in plants by cultivating unique flora.
Alternative responses to “I Love You”
* Who doesn’t
* I know
* A horrible decision, really
* [Laughs Nervously]
* [Laughs Hysterically]
* I’m sorry
* [Finger Guns]
You spoiled brats with your fancy Cheerios flavors!
When we were kids Cheerios had one flavor!
And that flavor was paper!
“As I gaze into the future, I see Impish Dragon screwing up and erasing a bunch of the cartoons and memes from Thursday’s episode. He ends up looking like a complete … what is the word that the humans use … doomas? … doolus? … no, no, no … Doofus! Yes, he looks like a complete…”
Alright Sandra Seer, that’s fine. Yes, I screwed up this morning’s (Thursday’s) issue. Many of you were very KIND to point it out to me. Several quite early this morning. Some comments in the comments section that you can go and check out for yourselves.
As promised, I will make up for it with this episode, I hope, by making it a bit longer than usual.
Now, can you guys stop whispering behind your hands and let us get back to it, please?
Yup! He’ll keep you warm!
But, you won’t like it.
One guideline applies to fat and thin people alike:
If you’re thin, don’t eat fast.
If you’re fat, don’t eat. Fast.
Slight change in punctuation.
Michael was an extremely avid golfer with a cynical attitude and arrogance, that when he passed away, few people shed a tear. Michael approached the Pearly Gates where St. Peter was waiting for him. Rather than pass through the gates as normal people had done, Michael stopped to ask a question.
“Before I agree to come in, I want to know exactly what kind of golf course you have here” he said to St. Peter.
“That shouldn’t matter to you.” said St. Peter.
“But it does. And then in his arrogant manner exclaimed “Well if I can’t see it, then I’m not coming in!”
“Very well Michael. As you wish.look through the gates.”
He looked and saw the poorest, most rundown, excuse for a golf course that it made him sick to his stomach. “Forget it. There is no way in Hell I’m going to spend eternity playing on that course!”
Just then, Michael heard the Devil calling him over the gate. “Come over here and see what I have to offer.”
Michael peers through the gate and he is elated! There is the most absolutely fabulous golf course he has ever seen! He turns to the Devil and says “I want to play THAT course!”
“Ok. Step on through and it’s yours forever.”
St. Peter pleaded with Michael as he headed off with the Devil and the gates closed behind him.
Michael walked up to the first tee and said “I can’t wait to play! Where are my clubs and ball?
The Devil roared with laughter. “Oh, there aren’t any.”
And therein lies the biggest difference between the two. With God, you ALWAYS get the truth, He will NEVER lie to you. EVER. With Satan, he will ALWAYS lie and NEVER tell you the truth. If it looks too good to be true, IT IS!!!
So, this is an old one, but a really funny one, so we’re doing it again.
Mrs. O’Donovan was walking down O’Connell Street in Dublin, and coming in the opposite direction was Father O’Rafferty.
“Hello,” said the Father, “And hows Mrs. O’Donovan, didn’t I marry you two years ago?”
“You did that, Father.”
“And are there any little ones yet?”
“No, not yet, Father.”
“Well now, I’m going to Rome next week, and I’ll light a candle for you.”
“Thank you, Father.”
And away she went.
A few years later they met again. “Well now, Mrs. O’Donovan,” said the Father, “how are you?”
“Oh, very well,” said she.
“And tell me,” he said, “have you any little ones yet?”
“Oh yes, Father. I’ve had three sets of twins, and four singles–ten in all.”
“Now isn’t that wonderful,” he said, “And how is your lovely husband?”
“Oh,” she said, “he’s over in Rome to blow that bloody candle out!”
I really love this next one also…you’ll see
In a train compartment, there are three men and a ravishing young girl.
The four passengers join in conversation, which very soon turns to the erotic.
Then, the young girl proposes, “If each of you will give me $1.00, I will show you my legs.”
The men, charmed by this young girl, all pull a buck out of their wallet.
And then the girl pulls up her dress a bit to show her legs.
Then she says, “If each of you gentlemen will give me $10.00, I’ll show you my thighs,” and men being what they are, they all pull out a ten dollar bill.
The girl pulls up her dress all the way to her legs in full.
Conversation continues, and the men, a bit excited, have all taken off their coats.
Then the young girl says, “If you will give me $100, I will show you where I was operated on for appendicitis.”
All three fork over the money. The girl then turns to the window and points outside at a building they’re passing. “See there in the distance. That’s the hospital where I had it done!”
After his annual physical, the sexually active bachelor was waiting in the doctor’s office for the results.
“Well,” said the doctor, “I have good news and bad news for you.”
“The way I feel, please give me the good news first,” replied the bachelor.
“The good news,” announced the doctor, “is that your penis has grown an additional four inches since your last exam.”
“Great!” the man shouted, “What is the bad news?”
“It’s malignant,” replied the doctor.
On your out of order bathroom….nurses do it that way all the time…We dont want what you got accidentally getting in our twhat….have not ever tried to spell that before so sorry ….
I suppose you are right! Never thought of it before.