Welcome to the Dragon Laffs and Leprechaun Laffs Multimedia Enterprises, LLC. New Year’s Eve Gala, Bash, Hedonistic Celebration! Also know as the DL&LLMENYEGBHC.
And you wonder why we didn’t send out written invitations! I presented this party idea to the miserly Lethal Leprechaun, who you might remember only gave me a measly 500,00 gp for the last party I hosted and he informed me that engraved invitations were out for this party!
Do ya realize how much the engravin’ would be now laddie?, he asked me.
Well, since we are a multimedia company, I would assume we had our OWN engraving service.
Aye, we do. And it would still be a cost per letter, and more than 1000 personal engraved invitations, that works out to 4,337 gold and that’s just for the ridiculous title of your ridiculous bloody party! Nay! Just send out the invites like we normally do. Through mythical magical mail service!
Bloody no sense dragons.
Anyway, that’s how that conversation went.
Needless to say, the party starts …. well … about now! So, grab yourself a beverage, partake of all the wonderful food and start this party by wading through this, our special New Year’s issue.
What are you all doing still standing here! Let’s get this party started!
One of the most over used or misused part of New Year is the New Year Resolution. So, one of the things that I resolve is to face every obstacle, every day with fun and laughter. I thought of that when I read this joke from our dear friend Ginny and I realize that this is the exact way that Mrs. Dragon and I behave with each other, and the same way that Lethal and I do, although I do care how big his butt is.
One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife, “Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!”
His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn’t let such a comment go unrewarded.
The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. “What in the world is this?” He said to himself as a little “dust” cloud appeared when he shook them out.
“April,” he hollered into the bathroom, “why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?”
She replied with a snicker, “It’s not talcum powder It’s ‘Miracle Grow!’”
Sometimes my dyslexia kicks in….sorry.
You know, it’s normally Lethal who has the recipes, but this one is from our own Ginny and I think you’ll like this one.
Clean them thoroughly of all bitterness,
Hate, and jealousy.
Make them just as fresh and clean as possible.
Now cut each month into twenty-eight, thirty, or
Thirty-one different parts,
But don’t make up the whole batch at once.
Prepare it one day at a time out of these ingredients.
Mix well into each day one part of faith,
One part of patience, one part of courage,
And one part of work.
Add to each day one part of hope,
Faithfulness, generosity, and kindness.
Blend with one part prayer, one part meditation,
And one good deed.
Season the whole with a dash of good spirits,
A sprinkle of fun, a pinch of play,
And a cupful of good humor.
Pour all of this into a vessel of love.
Cook thoroughly over radiant joy,
Garnish with a smile,
And serve with quietness, unselfishness,
And cheerfulness.
You’re bound to have a happy new year.
Dang! There’s that dyslexia kicking in again.
So, this is actually a Christmas poem, but it is so true and so suitable for the New Year as well, that I have got to share it with you. This describes me (and I suspect most of you) to a tee!
See what I mean?
So, what the hell does Auld Lang Syne mean, anyway? Well, for the best answer I could find, we go to the ABC News website. There we learn:
Here it is. The answer to a perennial question of what on earth does “Auld Lang Syne” mean?
The confusion over the song is arguably almost as much of a tradition as the song itself. As revelers stumble and mumble through the verses-singing the “auld lang syne” part much louder than the rest of the song because it’s really the only part people know-someone always asks what the words mean.
The title of the Scottish tune translates to “times gone by” and is about remembering friends from the past and not letting them be forgotten.
Despite its strong association with New Year’s Eve, “Auld Lang Syne,” written by Robert Burns in the 1700s, was never intended to be a holiday song. Guy Lombardo is credited with popularizing the song when his band used it as a segue between two radio programs during a live performance at the Roosevelt Hotel in New York in 1929. By coincidence, they played “Auld Lang Syne” just after the clock hit midnight, and a New Year’s tradition was born.
The song, and the confusion that comes with it, has been immortalized in countless movies and TV shows.
In “When Harry Met Sally,” Billy Crystal’s baffled Harry wonders, “What does this song mean? My whole life, I don’t know what this song means. I mean, ‘Should old acquaintance be forgot?’ Does that mean that we should forget old acquaintances. Or does it mean that if we happened to forget them, we should remember them, which is not possible because we already forgot them?”
“Well, maybe it just means that we should remember that we forgot them or something,” Sally reasons. “Anyway, it’s about old friends.”
So as you surround yourself with friends old and new tonight, sing on.
And if you really want to impress people, here are the lyrics to the English translated version of the song you’ll probably hear:
Should old acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind? Should old acquaintance be forgot, and auld lang syne?
CHORUS: For auld lang syne, my dear, for auld lang syne, we’ll take a cup of kindness yet, for auld lang syne. And surely you’ll buy your pint cup and surely I’ll buy mine! And we’ll take a cup o’ kindness yet, for auld lang syne.
We two have run about the slopes, and picked the daisies fine ; But we’ve wandered many a weary foot, since auld lang syne.
CHORUS
We two have paddled in the stream, from morning sun till dine; But seas between us broad have roared since auld lang syne.
CHORUS
And there’s a hand my trusty friend ! And give us a hand o’ thine ! And we’ll take a right good-will draught, for auld lang syne.
CHORUS
Now, for one of the greatest renditions, here’s Straight No Chaser:
So, quickly, what’s the story of Straight No Chaser? Straight No Chaser (SNC) is a professional acappella group which originated in 1996 at Indiana University. In 2007, a 1998 video of “The 12 Days of Christmas,” went viral with over 8 million views and subsequently led to a five-album record deal with Atlantic Records in 2008. The YouTube video has been viewed over 20 million times.
And the one that started it all….
There is a lot more information about them here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Straight_No_Chaser_(group) and is well worth reading. The Christmas Can Can is one that Lethal had for Christmas and I commented that it was one of my favorite songs. You can go on YouTube and spend an hour or more just watching their videos.
Another thing we do for the New Year is look back at the old year to see what statistics have been measured. Even silly things. Like this long video (almost 40 minutes) of the Guinness world records that were broken in 2016 … like the longest selfie stick, the fastest dog on a ball for 10 meters, or the longest human/mattress domino fall. Some of them are pretty cool. Definitely worth watching (or I wouldn’t have put it here. Duh!)
I know it’s not Thanksgiving, but at New Year’s, it’s also worth looking back at our own lives. This was sent to me by Ginny, but it matches up with my own feelings so well, I have to share it with you.
My body sometimes feels sore, but it still works.
I don’t sleep well most nights, but I do wake up to fight another day.
My wallet is not full, but my stomach is. (Pretty tough feat for a dragon)
I don’t have all the things I ever wanted, but I do have everything I’ll ever need.
My life is by no means perfect, but it’s mine and I’m happy.
So many of us have so much more than most people around the world, but sadly, most people always want more.
Family:
Like branches on a tree, we all grow in different directions. Yet, our roots remain as one.
I know that many of us are already inebriated enough that this is a real possibility tonight.
How about some cool statistics about New Year’s Resolutions:
Top 10 New Years Resolutions for 2015 (as compiled by statisticbrain.com)
- Lose Weight
- Getting Organized
- Spend Less/Save More
- Enjoy Life to the Fullest
- Staying Fit and Healthy
- Learn Something Exciting
- Quit Smoking
- Help Others in Their Dreams
- Fall in Love
- Spend More Time with Family.
Now honestly, by a show of hands, how many of you have used at least half of these? Yeah, I figured as much. How about at least 6? 7? Still a couple of hands up. 8? 9?! Of you that still have your hand up for 9, have any of you hit all ten! Wow! Really? I wouldn’t have guessed it was that many of you.
How many have I done? My own total is 7.
That is the same for so many of us!
- Percent of Americans who usually make New Year’s Resolutions – – – – – – – – – – 45%
- Percent of Americans who infrequently make New Year’s Resolutions – – – – – – 17%
- Percent of American’s who absolutely never make New Year’s Resolutions – – – 38%
- Percent of people who are successful in achieving their resolution – – – – – – – – – – – -8%
- Percent who have infrequent success – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – 49%
- Percent who never succeed and fail on their resolution each year – – – – – – – – – – – -24%
People who explicitly make resolutions are 10 times more likely to attain their goals than people who don’t explicitly make resolutions.
Yup, we all know some people like that.
Super Bowl season is fast approaching, so this next item is quite appropriate for this issue. It comes from a Craig’s List item.
#SERIOUS INQUIRIES ONLY:
A friend of mine has two tickets for the February 05, 2017 Super Bowl @ NRG.
They are box seats plus airfares and hotel accommodation. He didn’t realize when he bought them that this is the same day as his wedding – so he can’t go. If you’re interested and want to go instead of him, it’s at First Baptist Church in Houston, Texas at 5pm. Her name is Keisha. She will be the one in the white dress.
If he was truly serious with this offer, he would’ve included a picture of Keisha.
It happens quick, little fellow. You blink your eyes and you’re an old man.
New Years Eve is the only acceptable time to wear body glitter without being mistaken for a stripper.
If your born in September, its pretty safe to assume your parents started out the New Year with a Bang!
Remember you can reset your resolutions on January 14th (Orthodox New Year) and February 8th (Chinese New Year). After that, even I can’t help you.
As bad as 2016 has been, yeah, I’m right there with the pessimist.
Disclaimer: Not JUST on New Year’s Eve.
And with that, we stroll into our closing to finish partying with all our fellow campers, friends, family, loved ones… We’ve been invited to the party opener, which also happens to be the issue ender. So, let’s wonder over to Lethal’s private quarters, shall we?
The closing today has been given over to my dear friend, brother, fellow warrior and partner in nattering in this ezine. I give you, Lethal Leprechaun:
Dragon Laffs 
Dear Fellas,,
A great issue!!!,, May both you and your families have a SAFE, HEALTHY AND HAPPY NEW YEAR.
Maggie
Thanks Maggie, Ginny and Leah! From your mouths to God’s ears!
An outstanding issue to end the year 2016. Wishing you all a very Happy New Year….may it be filled with all your hopes and dreams. May it bring good health and financial gains.
A new year with great hope for we finally have a new president!
Happy New Year! Another one we lost this year that wasn’t mentioned was Leonard Cohen…absolutely loved that man and his music. Started listening to him way back in the 60’s…he will be greatly missed.
Wow! You’re right, Brenda. We missed him. And you’re right, he will be greatly missed.