I think the above header is most appropriate for my week, this week. I’ve worn so many different hats and been so many different people (and that’s not EVEN counting all the additional people in my head) that it’s just been a crazy week.
All three of us in the family have had one or more Doctor’s appointments this week, to the point that we had some sort of appointment every day. And now the insurance company is going to give me a hard time over a medicine that the doctor put me on, because the administrative people at the insurance company know more what I need then my doctor does.
Anyway, the rest of the week was more of the same.
I’m working on Saturday, off on Sunday and will be having some people over on Saturday night. You all are invited, the only requirement is for you to bring your own drinks. I used to try and have something for everyone in the drinks department, but that got to be way too crazy so now I have what we like, and you’re always welcome to share that, but otherwise, you’re on your own.
OH, and the number one rule. If you’re going to drink, I get your keys when you show up. Even if you have a dedicated sober driver, I will happily give them back to the DD when you’re ready to leave if that individual has remained sober.
So, now that I’ve said a great deal of nothing in my opening monologue, let’s get to the good stuff while I go take a nap. I really got to get better writers.
Three nurses sadly pass away. They rise up into heaven, and there they approach the gate keeper to plead their case for entering paradise.
So the keeper points to the first nurse, who says: “I worked in an emergency room. I treated many people, and always did my best to help. And although sometimes we would lose patients, I still think I deserve to enter.”
The gate keeper glances at her file and admits her to heaven.
The second nurse then says, ” I used to work in the operating room, assisting surgeons. It was a lot of stress, and we lost many people, but I always did my best.”
The keeper glances at her file and motions her to enter.
“And you?” He asks the third nurse.
“I was a case manager for an HMO. I worked with thousands of patients.” She answers confidently.
The gate keeper takes a long and careful look at her file. He pulls out a calculator and starts entering digits quickly, looking back from time to time at the woman’s file. After a few minutes like this, the keeper looks up, smiles at her and says: “Congratulations! You’ve been admitted to heaven…for five days!”
We interrupt this e-zine to bring you this breaking news story.
Lewinsky Fails To Endorse Clinton
Monica Lewinsky released the following statement on Hillary Clinton’s run for President:
“I will not vote for Hillary Clinton. The last Clinton Presidency left a bad taste in my mouth. As we get closer to November of this election year, citizens must remember that they cannot trust Hillary Clinton to create American jobs. The last time she had a meaningful job, she outsourced it to me. And I simply blew it.”
We now return you to your issue of Dragon Laffs already in progress. Thank you for your understanding.
…and the grocer says, “That’s NOT a banana, lady!”
So, I started with this very cute “Mental Health Hotline Message” and afterward there was video after video of taped scammer calls and phone scammers being owned and all kinds of good stuff. Be aware that after you watch this one, you may very well be sucked in and watch for hours. Sadly, this is the first one that I watched this morning (Monday) and got absolutely nothing else done before I had to go to work.
Every now and then we have to give you one of those really nice, touchy/feely videos to make you feel good about the world. Here’s one of them now:
And I’ve included thjs one, just because stuff blowing up is cool and fireworks are cool, so when a fireworks factory blows up, that is pretty much at the top of the coolness scale.
As some/many of you know, I’m a science geek as well as a fantasy, mythical creature. And rather than being just involved with my own heritage (the realm of fantasy and mythology oddly enough) I’m also a big fan of science fiction. This detail of the U.S.S. Enterprise is really quite detailed. I believe I saved the whole hi-res picture above, so if you’d like to get a better look at it, you can left click and “save as” and when you open it with your picture program you should be able to zoom in on the details.
But then again, maybe not.
There is yet another new scam off wondering around with out adult supervision. This scam involves spoofing your caller I.D. and trying to trick you into believing you are receiving a call from the police department, IRS, State Police, etc. Here’s a quick article from our dear friends at the Kommando Show.
Watch out for fake caller ID scams
ualifies as quote of the year.
No! DECADE. Wait a minute. It’s the greatest quote EVER!
I figured that this spot is perfect for the following graphic:
Baby says, “Let’s see…is her mouth open? Then yup, she’s spouting shit!”
Okay! Uncle! I can’t take anymore!
And it really sucks when you can’t find the damn can opener!
“Hey! I’ll bet if I pull the trigger back a little bit, it will let enough light in the other end that I’ll be able to tell if there is a bullet in there or not.”
“I’m Batma…” Thud!
I always wondered where “Stumpy” got his nickname from.
“Hey Jethro, kneel down, hold my beer and watch this!”
“Sure son, go on out and play on the trampoline if you want.”
And it goes by WAY TOO FAST!!!
Of course! What else would it be?
“Bubba! Come on! Walmart dropped the price of those chips you like!”
And with that my friends, another issue of Dragon Laffs has come to an end. I know there wasn’t as much of my jabbering in this issue, but I hope you all got something to laugh at. Until next time…