Good Morning Campers! Wow! The things that have gone on this week. Last night (Thursday) we get word that the Court of appeals has upheld Arizona’s controversial law that says they are allowed to check whether someone is in the country on some sort of legal status while stopping them for some other legitimate reason. I think we’re going to start a pool as to whether the United States (in the persona of Mr. Obama) has the stones to take it to the next court….if there even IS a next court. What do you guys think?
Yes, as the header proclaims, I’m on the road again this next week….Actually, as you are reading this on Saturday morning, I left yesterday. I’m in Wisconsin for a week for another base’s training exercise where I get to help judge/teach part of the requirements for exercise completion. Should be lots of fun. I’ll try and send updates, either through here or through Lethal as to how it’s going.
So now, let’s say we get to it and laff!!!!
New Medicare part X. This is a grand idea! First of all, it will work, secondly, I won’t increase expenses near as much as a new program will, because this program is using facilities and procedures that are all ready in place. So, here is the new plan description…
You’re a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do?
Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Politicians.
Of course, this means you will be sent to prison where you will get three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating, air conditioning and all the health care you need!
Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That’s great. Need a new hip, knees, kidney, lungs or heart? They’re all covered.
As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you as often as they do now.
And who will be paying for all of this? It’s the same government that just told you that you they cannot afford for you to go into a home.
And you can get rid of 4 useless politicians while you are at it.
Plus, and because you are a prisoner, you don’t have to pay any income taxes anymore.
Is this a great country or what?
Okay campers, now it’s your turn to tear this idea apart and to submit a new program of your own makeup.
This should (and does for me) scare the shit out of us! This is important, please watch the video! You’ll have to go to the website to do that, but trust me when I tell you that its worth it!
I know the food thing is usually in the Leprechauns wheelhouse, but I have to share this with you. It’s something Toni shared with us. Toni also says: Despite the fact that I am a card carrying chocoholic even I think I’d have to draw the line at a chocolate eclair hotdog. Thanks Toni….I’m relatively sure that we agree whole heartedly with you!
The archbishop-elect of San Francisco was arrested in the
This is great! I’ve seen the finished product before, but never how they’ve made it. Well worth the watch….what? You can’t see this video by clicking on it? Well, no, you can’t. You have to go to the website. http://dragonlaffs.com
Proof reading is important, especially for the casual writing opportunities.
This evening at 7 p.m. there will be a hymn sing in the park across
the street from the church. Bring a blanket and come prepared
Mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a couple nice cold beers. The day was really quite beautiful, and the brew facilitated some deep thinking on various topics.
Finally I thought about an age old question:
Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the Nuts?
Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts.
Well, after another beer, and some heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with the answer to that question.
Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby; and here is the reason for my conclusion
A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, “it might be nice to have another child.”
On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, “You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts.”
I rest my case.
Megan Mariah Barnes is Florida’s 1st bikini-shaving-related traffic offender of the year.
Twin Babies Love It When Daddy Plays Guitar
These 11 month old twins just can’t get enough of their daddy playing guitar. Watching their faces just light up would make anyone’s day!
Thanks to our dear, dear friend Diaman for continuing to fill her weekly section up with puns. I’m not sure where she gets them…and I’m fairly certain I don’t want to know where she gets them from. Thank you sweet lady. Thanks for helping us all to laugh just a tiny bit more.
Our Italian Chef died. He pasta way.
University of Texas students put cowbells on their longhorn mascot because his horns don’t work.
He who dies with the most houses, cars and deposits in off-shore accounts wins.
I came upon a man slicing goose feathers and stuffing them into a pillow. “Would you like a cigarette?” I asked. He answered, “No thanks, I’m trying to cut down.”
Two Muslims have crashed a speedboat into the Thames barrier in London.
Police think it might be the start of Ram-a-dam.
The jogger who overslept found himself running late.
I’ll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself.
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can’t improve your lie.
Elevators have their ups and downs, but escalators are a step in the right direction.
Apparently the maid I hired to clean my house, while I was watching the London Olympics, was only second best. She just walked off with the silver.
The reason weddings are so happy is because so many of the practices that take place at them are custom merry.
The gravity was so powerful, I couldn’t stand it.
Any ball that was rolling or bouncing in a haphazard manner should be passed to a teammate rather than used to score. To remind them, he printed across the top of the chalkboard, in the locker room, ‘Ball that fritters is not goaled’.
Another day, another naked man gets arrested covered in cooking spray. All I hope for is that his girlfriend’s name is Pam.
I used to work as a trapeze artist…until I was let go.
An insulting telegram is a barbed wire.
A Scotsman is on holiday in New York City. It’s a balmy spring day and he is wearing a kilt. A young woman comes up to him and boldly asks him if anything is worn beneath the kilt. “No lassie” he replies, “everything is in fine working order.”
A man walks into a bar with a set of jumper cables. The bartender says “Hey, don’t think you’re going to come in here and start something!”
He became an electrician because as a child his mother always took him to the outlet stores.
He’s doing much butter since he found a whey of milking his firm of expenses when none have been in curd.
There once was a lawyer named Bender,
Who worked as a Public Defender.
Since his limo bumped into
A little Ford Pinto
He’s now referred to as Defender Bender.
To all my wine drinking friends…and I know there’s a lot of us out there…
Often, even the most unrealistic characters are well-known actors…
This is utterly fantastic. It probably should have gone under websites to see, but this is so incredibly special that putting it as it’s own Last Word is the only right thing to do. As others have said of this, there’s no reason to ever go on a vacation again….okay, so nah! Vacations are for more than just seeing stuff, but really, this is truly fantastic!