Well, it’s October and I just checked my Halloween folder and I have like a gazillion memes.  So, starting today and running through the 31st, I’ll be throwing some Halloween flavor in each issue. To help those of you who celebrate this holiday to enjoy.

In other news … I don’t have any other news. So, let’s jump in.

Massachusetts  Law

Bullets may not be used as currency.

Aussie Pete, you sure send me an awful lot of these “Meanwhile in Australia” Memes.

And no, that’s not a challenge!

A pompous Baptist minister was seated next to a cowboy on a flight to Texas. 

After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. 

The cowboy asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him. 

The flight attendant then asked the minister if he would like a drink. 

He replied in disgust, “I’d rather be savagely raped by brazen whores than let liquor touch my lips.” 

The cowboy then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, “Me too. I didn’t know we had a choice.” 

This is getting out of hand.

Okay, I see what you did there.

There was a blonde who was having financial troubles so she decided to kidnap a child and demand a ransom. 

She went to a local park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this note: “I have kidnapped your child. Leave $10,000 in a plain brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park tomorrow at 7 AM. Signed, The Blonde.” 

She pinned the note inside the boy’s jacket and told him to go straight home. 

The next morning, she returned to the park to find the $10,000 in a brown bag, behind the big oak tree, just as she had instructed. 

Also inside the bag was the following note:

“Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde would do this to another!”

Three absent-minded professors were talking together in a bus terminal.  

They got so engrossed in what they were saying that they didn’t notice the bus had pulled in. 

As the driver sang out,”All aboard,” they looked up startled and dashed from the platform.  

Two of them managed to hop on the bus, but the third didn’t make it. 

As he stood sadly watching the bus disappear into the distance, a stranger tried to cheer him up, saying, “You shouldn’t feel too bad.  

Two out of three made it, and that’s a pretty good average.” 

The professor shook his head.  “But THEY came to see ME off.” 

What do you mean, “Used To”?

Visiting St Patrick’s Cathedral on a tour of New York City, my daughter and her children were awed by the sight. 

The kids were especially curious about the votive candles, so my daughter asked if they’d each like to light one. 

She explained that is it customary to say a prayer of petition or thanks, and she was careful to tell them that these are not like birthday candles. 

“Do you have any questions?” she asked.

“No,” said the 5-year-old, “but if there’s a pony outside, it’s mine.” 

Joe as poet:

An astronomer slept in the sun, 
Then woke with his fly quite undone. 
He remarked, with a smile, 
“Hoorah! A sundial! 
And it’s now a quarter past one.”

Oh come on! What are they?

And that’s it for this one my friends. A little short, but I ran out of time. Hope you enjoyed it anyway. My love to you all!