Okay, so we’re racing to get an issue done for Monday while I’m working all weekend AND trying to get enough sleep to survive.  SO… Let’s jump right into it and …

What a fantastic idea for a cake!!!

And I’m damn proud to be a brother veteran of yours!

And just because they call themselves Christians doesn’t make them Christians anymore than standing in a garage makes them a car.

Ohio Laws

It is against the law to kill a housefly within 160 feet of a church without a license.

Have you ever worked in an office where someone insisted upon listening to their voice mail using the speakerphone (at full volume, naturally).

It can really begin to bother you after a while. There was a fellow in my office who was the ultimate offender.

I found a fairly easy fix for that, though. Have a female friend call his desk when he’s not there and leave a message like “Hi, this is Candy from 1-900-HOT-BABE. You haven’t paid for the ‘toys’ we sent you, you naughty boy.

You wouldn’t want me to come over there and spank you, would you?”

It is the last time you hear that particular speakerphone, I can assure you.

Little Morris asked his aunt Sadie how old she was. ….”39 and holding,” replied Auntie Sadie.

Little Morris thought for a moment, then said, “And how old would you be if you let go?”

Ohio Laws

A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him. However, the reverse is not true, even if it’s a police dog.

You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

– Dale Carnegie ( 1888 – 1955)

Two Iranians meet in California. One starts to greet the other in Farsi,the language of their native country.

The other Iranian waved him away contemptuously and said, “We’re in America now. Speak Spanish!”

There’s that whole car – garage thing again.

A grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson, who is coming to visit with his wife: “You come to the front door of the apartment complex. I am in apartment 14T. There is a big panel at the door. With your elbow, push button 14T. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow hit 14. When you get out I am on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell.

“Grandma, that sounds easy, but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?”

“You’re coming empty handed?”

Okay, that one was easy, as opposed to the last one…that I had a LOT of people correct me on!  Thank you all very much!  The Liverpool Football Club (Soccer Team) uses the song You’ll Never Walk Alone as their theme song.  

And that my dear friends, is all for today.  May God Bless you all with Love and Happiness until we meet again.