Dragon Laffs #2128

Today is Sunday and I’m writing because I need to write.  I need to write because today was a hard day.  

I told you that one of our pastors passed away on Friday.  That’s like losing a member of your family.  And after actually losing another member of my family on Thursday, it’s like an extra kick in the teeth.  

Today’s service was so touching and so moving.  Lots of prayers and lots of songs.  I was security for today’s service.  Yes, we have security for every function.  Normally there is 3 of us scheduled for each service and then for Bible Study and things like that, whoever is a member of the Security Team who is in attendance usually just kind of keeps an eye on things.  We started doing that a couple of years ago when there was the spate of church shootings across the country.  I wasn’t here a couple of years ago when it started, but with my background and experience, I volunteered a month or so ago, was investigated and accepted.  I just happened to be assigned to this Sunday.  Anyway, it kept me in the back hallway of the church during service, I can hear everything that goes on, but I can’t really participate.

But, that was a good thing, because today’s service brought back a lot of memories of Mary and having just lost her brother, Anthony, and the Pastor, well … like I said … it was a tough day.

And the final song they sang…Oh my goodness!  It was SO HARD!  I cried like a baby!  Tears rolling down these big old dragon scales!  And many, many other people were the same way.

I know where Mary is.  I know where Anthony is.  I know where the Pastor is.  Can’t say, “I’m sorry for your loss.”  They aren’t lost.  We all know exactly where they all are.  They are all in the Kingdom of Heaven, with God and Jesus and having a wonderful time and are happier than they’ve ever been before, with perfect spiritual bodies, and doing God’s work.

But that doesn’t mean that we, who are still here on earth, don’t miss them terribly.  That doesn’t mean that we, who are still trudging through the mortal coil don’t wish they were still here with us.  Not that we would want them to come back.  Because now that they have experienced the perfection that is Heaven, I would NEVER ask them to give that up to return here…even for me…especially for me.  But that doesn’t mean I miss them any the less.

So, where does that leave us?

It leaves us making the best of things, until we can join them.  And making very sure that we live a life in such a way that we DO join them!  We do that in several ways, one of which is right here with Dragon Laffs, where we thumb our noses at the evil people in the world and we do two things.  The first thing we do is, as often as we can, we point that evil and wrongness out, either outright or humorously.  Of course you know that we prefer humorously.

And the second thing we do, is much more general than that.  We LAUGH!  So, let’s start with that one, shall we?

It really does help get through the day.  Eases stress, takes away worry (even if just for a little while) and it HELPS!  Ask anyone, they’ll tell you.

I just told a story at work about my childhood that I thought was really funny but now everyone is super quiet and someone said quietly, “I’m so sorry.”

It takes about 10,000 hours to become an expert at something, so let me know if you have any questions about anxiety.

Genie:  You have 17 wishes.

Me:  Isn’t it normally 3???

Genie:  Yeah but [vaguely gestures to me] a lot of issues going on here.

Not sure if that was a lot of wind or not much of a house.


“These stupid wooden things keep popping up all over the place.  I keep pulling them down and they keep coming back.”

How would they know?

This must be a very popular cartoon.  I got this from like four of you guys within a couple of days.

Stop Feeling So Entitled!

All you deserve is life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.


Free tuition
Free healthcare
Free abortions
Free housing
Free bla, bla, bla

There is no such thing as “free” my little snowflake. 
Someone is paying for it.  And it’s never a politician.

You deserve

Life (enjoy)
Liberty (preserve it)
Pursuit of Happiness (WORK for it)

Maybe I was raised wrong, but I was taught if you wanted something you worked for it.

Race matters only to racists.

The rest of us care about character.

And then my guess is, she’s no longer your girl friend.

“That darn Impish Dragon is REALLY good at Hide-and-Seek”

How should you exercise your pet Ferret?

On a Ferret Wheel.

Aspire to greatness.

But remember that no one ever assassinated a refrigerator repairman

– Bird Waring

I’ve opened a can of worms.

They just sit there, the worms.  Hardly the chaos that’s been advertised.

And Yet Another Tombstone

In Memory of Beza Wood
Departed this life Nov. 2, 1837
Aged 45 yrs.
Here lies one Wood
Enclosed in wood
One Wood Within another.
The outer wood Is very good:
We cannot praise The other.

A little girl was diligently pounding away on her father’s word processor.

She told him she was writing a story.

“What’s it about?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” she replied. “I can’t read.”

Although this married couple enjoyed their new fishing boat together, it was the husband who was behind the wheel operating the boat.

He was concerned about what might happen in an emergency. So one day out on the lake he said to his wife, “Please take the wheel, dear. Pretend that I am having a heart attack. You must get the boat safely to shore and dock it.”

So she drove the boat to shore and safely docked it.

Later that evening, the wife walked into the living room where her husband was watching television. She sat down next to him, switched the TV channel, and said to him, “Please go into the kitchen, dear. Pretend I’m having a heart attack and set the table, cook dinner and wash the dishes.”

“Joe Biden traveled over 7,000 miles to beg Saudi Arabia for more oil, even as he continues his attack on American energy producers.  We are still waiting for Biden to travel to Texas, Alaska, and North Dakota to meet with American energy producers.” ~ Tommy Pigott

While on the bus, my mother noticed a young man, who was holding onto the same pole, staring at her.

Eventually, he said, “Excuse me. This is my stop.”

Since she wasn’t blocking his way, she was confused. “Well,” she said,”go ahead.”

“And this is my pole,” he said.

My mother was completely perplexed until the young man added, “I just bought it at the hardware store.”

And with that, he picked up his pole and carried it off the bus.

This woman decides to buy a new cupboard that you have to assemble yourself. 

Back home she reads the instructions carefully and assembles the cupboard in the bedroom. 

It looks really neat. Then, a train passes and the whole cupboard collapses. 

Thinking that she must have done something wrong she rereads the instructions and reassembles the cupboard. 

Then, a train passes and the cupboard collapses again. 

Now, fed up she calls customer service. She is told that this is quite impossible and that they’ll send along a technician to have a look. 

The technician arrives and assembles the cupboard.  Then, a train passes and the cupboard collapses. 

Completely baffled by this unexpected event, the technician decides to reassemble the cupboard and get inside it to see whether he can find out what causes the cupboard to collapse. 

At this point, the woman’s husband comes home, sees the cupboard and says: “That’s a nice looking cupboard”, and opens it. 

Says the technician: “You may find this hard to believe, but I’m just standing here waiting for the next train.”   

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and think, “Well, that’s not going to happen”.

The other night I ate at a really nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.

Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder in the car these days,no one talks about seeing UFO’s like they used to?

You know when you’re sitting on a chair & you lean back so you’re just on two legs, then you lean too far & you almost fall over but at the last second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time.

According to a recent survey, men say that the first thing they notice about a woman are their eyes. And women say that the first thing they notice about men is that they’re a bunch of liars.

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 & a substantial tax cut save you thirty cents?

I’m not 40-something. I’m $39.95, plus shipping and handling.

There ‘s a theory that states that if anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for & why it ‘s here; it will instantly disappear & be replaced by something even more bizarre & inexplicable. There’s another theory that states that this has already happened.

How is it that one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

Doctors can be frustrating. You wait 6 weeks for an appointment and he says, “I wish you’d have come to me sooner.”

There was a young girl who begat 
Three babies named Nat, Pat and Tat. 
T’was fun in the breeding 
But hell in the feeding 
When she found there’s no tit for Tat. 

And it’s Monday and I’m finished with this one and will probably start the Saturday episode soon since I have a big inspection at work this week.  If I can get ahead for Saturday, it will help to stay ahead.  So, for now, I will say to all of you, may you be blessed with Love and Happiness until we meet again.

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Dragon Laffs #2128

  1. Danny says:

    So sorry for your loss. We learn too late that it is a part of life–a really bad one. We really never get over such things. We just learn to live with them. Thanks for the Laffs.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s