Dragon Laffs #1909


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Good Morning Campers,458

Well, as I told you in my last quick message, this week has been “interesting” … pure chaos.  But, not necessarily in a bad way.  Well, let me start from the beginning.  My Izzy Dragon is has some challenges in her life that she shouldn’t have to face, but life is what it is.  At the age of 19 she is getting her first EVER real job.  This has caused her no end of drama and tears.  This occurred on Monday.  This is also the day her phone died.  Which pretty much pushed her over the edge.  Did I mention she has anxiety issues?

453  Then, the information from her old phone, wouldn’t transfer to her new phone.  Which included all her passwords and stuff that she needed to get the new phone set up. 

Then, the email she gave her new job for the new hire paperwork doesn’t work because she can’t remember the password for it because she set it up when she was in 4th grade and never had to use it again and when she goes to “forgot my password” can’t remember the answers to the security questions because, again, she set it up when she was in 4th grade.  She is now getting closer to the edge of having a complete breakdown.

And through all this, Mrs. Dragon is nervous as hell about her tests coming up (today…in just a couple of hours) and Izzy’s drama is pushing her closer to the edge.  I’ve taken half a day off every day this week just to try and solve problems and worked on said problems way late into the evening and am significantly2b1 minus on sleep by this point and am short handed at work and getting ready for multiple exercises and teaching a class on Saturday that needs to be prepped.

And opening her a real checking account with a debit card … that was fun.  But, I made sure that my name was on the account so I can go on line and see everything and help her out.  She needed that because her paycheck has to be direct deposited.  And she needed that anyway.

And through all this, Mrs. Dragon needed/wanted my attention, of course, because she’s nervous and we’re worried about her.  So … that’s why, the long version this time, you guys didn’t get a Dragon Laffs episode on Thursday.

But I do have some GOOD updates, too.  And we’ll get to those shortly, but first, let’s get this barbeque started …

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I was watching a show called “10 Steps to Avoiding A Shark Attack”.  I was really quite surprised that “Stay Out of the Water” wasn’t step 1.

 

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I don’t really Rise and Shine

I Caffeinate and

Hope for the Best

 

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This next one just proves that you don’t mess with anything dragon related:

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Last night I got my Viagra mixed up with my sleeping tablets …

I ended up having forty wanks!

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No one laughs or even smiles when I sing, “Lord I was born a scramblin’ man” every time I make eggs, but that’s the dad life, baby.

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baby dragon

One of my baby pictures …

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Had a great time horseback riding today …

but then I ran out of quarters.

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In all fairness, some of those who wander, are definitely lost.

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Wow…I’m back in the 70s and there’s a bong close by …

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And how we do it now …

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Quite the difference.

When I was about 8, I asked my dad if we could play “the naked man game.”  My dad, trying not to panic, asked me what it was.  I responded, “It’s the one we play when the babysitter is over.”  He then asked me to show him where the naked man game was, so I took him to the closet, opened the door, and pointed to Operation.

He told me years later that he nearly had a heart attack.

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Never underestimate the power of human stupidity … and they vote!

“I think it’s pretty gross people breast feed.  It’s not milk, it’s body fluids.  Might as well feed your little one your pee.  We have bottles and formula … that’s meant to feed your baby.  Stop giving your body fluid a classy name by calling it milk.  ITS NOT MILK.  MILK COMES FROM COWS.  It’s almost like saying almonds make milk.  Idiots everywhere.”

I’m flabbergasted

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Well, I don’t have an update on the young lady, although the last thing I heard was that she was doing good.  Much better than expected.  Not that she will ever be back to work or fully functional again, but not completely paralyzed.  I don’t know if she’ll ever get out of a wheelchair, that’s something for the future to decide, but is sounds like she’s like most real military members, she’s a fierce fighter and if anyone can do it, she can.  We’ve had some more donations, so some more people to thank.  You guys amaze me every single day.  You truly do.  You are an inspiration to me and I’ve been bragging on you.  I purposely haven’t announced any totals because some can give more than others and none are more important than others and every little bit counts.  I will, on the 4th of July when this closes down, announce the total we raised, but for right now, this is our list of donors:

Steven H.     Dan T.     Leah H.     Carlos W.     Ray S.     William E.     Jonathon J.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you all so very much!  It is a wonderful think you are doing.  And remember, there is still time for you guys.  Every little bit counts. 

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Breathtaking

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This is what a huge rhododendron tree looks like.

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The Jetsons takes place in 2062, and George Jetson is 40 years old, which means that somewhere right now George Jetson is being conceived.

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Dragon Balls

Dragons

Drama Llama

Dream Girl

Dreams

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Drill Sgt

drinking

Drive Thru 10

Drive Thru

Drowning

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Know

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Bob ran out of gas, and a bee flew in his car window.  “Are you out of gas?” said the bee.

“Yes,” said Bob.

“Gimme a minute,” said the bee, and flew away.  Minutes later, the bee returned with the entire hive of bees who all flew into his gas tank.  Moments later they emerged.

“Try it now.” said a passing bee.

Bob tried and the car started.  Bob said, “Wow!  What did you put in the tank?” …

BP

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Weird Fact

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At 46 letters, Massachusetts’s Lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg has the longest place name in the U.S.(even though it’s based on a joke).

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As we get older we think differently, don’t we? This letter was sent to the principal’s office after the school had sponsored a luncheon for the elderly. An elderly lady received a new radio at the lunch as a prize and was writing to say thank you. This story is a credit to all humankind ….especially if you are familiar with the elderly and their ways.
Dear Lincoln Elementary,
God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent Senior Citizens luncheon. I am 85 years old and live at the Springer Home for the Aged. All of my family has passed away. I am all alone now and it’s nice to know that someone is thinking of me. God bless you for your kindness to an old forgotten lady.
My roommate is 95 and has always had her own radio, but before I received one, she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was napping. The other day her radio fell off the nightstand and broke into a lot of pieces. It was awful and she was in tears.
Her distress over the broken radio touched me and I knew this was God’s way of answering my prayers. She asked me if she could listen to mine, and I told her to kiss my ass.
Thank you for that opportunity.
Sincerely,
Agnes

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Another one that the kids won’t get …

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And I can honestly say as one of the ones who are working and being taxed … THIS SUCKS!

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We all need to remember that!!

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And that is it for today.  Mrs. Dragon’s tests went well … I guess.  We won’t find out anything until Wednesday when we go back to the heart doctor.  So … more pins and needles until then. 

Thank you all for sticking with for the long haul.  Love and happiness, peace and prosperity to you all.

Cheers!

Impish

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2 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1909

  1. Leah D says:

    I have been receiving Dragon Laffs in my comcast (xfinity) mailbox for many years.
    Why then, are they now delivering it to my junk box?
    Did you forget to WOKE up?

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