Good Morning Campers,

So … Bernie Sander’s mittens are a display of white privilege, male privilege, and class privilege.  Well, this is a humor site and I have to say that is one of the funniest things I’ve heard in a long, long time.  Thank you Ingrid Seyer-Ochi, a former UC Berkeley professor, for giving me a good long belly laugh.  And thanks also for being a former teacher, glad you no longer have an influence on our impressionable young people. 

Oh, and thanks to Stephanie, who I think has made it her life’s mission to send me every single Bernie meme ever created.  I don’t particularly like the man, but if I find any of them appropriate, I might use them, but I do appreciate all the sends.

There are more than enough things to be pissed off about.  I think it’s friggin’ hilarious the amount of people who are now pissed off at Biden because he promised them $2000 checks if they voted the way he wanted them to vote in Georgia, made out right promises to them (which is illegal, by the way) and now is saying that they might … MIGHT get $1400 to equal $2000 if you add the $600 we already gave you.  But it wasn’t you that gave us $600, that was Trump, they all scream!  You LIED!  Well, no shit!  You didn’t see that coming?

Hmmm, let’s see.  Anyone who uses Executive Orders is a dictator … that’s a quote by Mr. Biden (and yes, you are correct, I have yet to put the word President along with his name because I don’t believe he deserves it) and yet I think we are up to 40 EOs from the office so far.  So … LIAR again. 

And … oh, let’s just skip to the punch line.  We all know he stole the damn election, whether through the media, the fake ballots, or the dominion electronics, or what all…he still wasn’t elected fairly.  So … the biggest lie of them all.  I would ask, how could he look himself in the mirror, but evil people don’t give a shit about stuff like that.  Look at Pelosi,  she can’t possibly have any mirrors anywhere near her, they’d all crack anytime she glanced their way.  That’s why she has to go  to the salon so much, someone else has to do her hair, she can’t look in a mirror.

Anyway, I’ve tried to be as gentle in this opening as I can … I didn’t even mention how pissed off I am with Biden sending millions of our hard-earned money overseas to pay for abortions while we have over 37,000 homeless Veterans … men and women who literally swore to give up their lives to protect each and every one of us… or the fact that he put over 100,000 people out of work by shutting down the pipeline so he could pay back his supporter by shipping the oil by rail … oh … at three times the cost.  Or the fact that he has thrown open our borders while we are in the midst of a (supposed) pandemic all while 1 in 7 adults are worried about not having enough food to feed their families.  Nah, I didn’t even mention HOW FUCKING PISSED OFF I AM ABOUT ALL OF THAT!!!!

Well … I am.

So … we better get to the laughter, because I’m getting madder and madder thinking about it.

I misplaced my pizza cutter, so I used my Bryan Adams CD …

… it cuts like a knife.

If you die in the same Hospital in which you were born, your average velocity will be zero.

Someone asked me what to do with left-over bacon.  I have never heard of that kind of bacon.  Is it new?

This made me laugh so hard I cried.  Maybe because it’s me …

Threw out my back sleeping and tweaked my neck sneezing so I’m probably just one strong fart away from complete paralysis.

Sometimes it’s fun to shrink down and play with the kids next door.

Well played, sir.

The Keystone pipeline.  Cancelled by Biden on first day.  Warren Buffet owns the railroad that is now transporting all that oil.  Warren Buffet donated 58 million to Biden campaign.  Warren Buffet would lose billions in transport fees if the pipeline is completed.  See how politics works?  It is not an environmental issue, it is a money issue … it is ALWAYS About THE MONEY!

And it’s our money!  It costs $3 dollars a barrel by pipeline and $10 a barrel by train … who’s going to pay the difference?  WE ARE!!!!

Fairy Porn

You really gotta wonder

Looking for a married woman, recently cheated on, mad and scorned, who is willing to sell her husband’s tools for cheap.

A homeless guy asked me for money today.  I looked in my pocket and all I had was a $20 bill.  “Do I really want this money going towards drugs?”, I thought to myself.  “Nah!”  So I gave him the $20.

Yeah, no shit…

A news reporter asks Michael Jordan if he thought the 90’s Bulls could beat Lebron’s Lakers …

MJ said yes …

Reporter asks by how much?

MJ replies by 2 or 3 points.

Reporter asks why such a close game?

MJ … well most of us are almost 60 now …

Wow … you think that the news is unbiased, open, and uncontrolled … watch this: https://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/what-happens-when-one-company-owns-dozens-of-local-news-stations/86562567/

And I have to call it a night.  I’m sorry this was a short one.  Working again this weekend, we’ll have to see how it goes for the next two issues.  Love and happiness to you all.

Cheers,

Impish Dragon.