Good Morning Campers,

If I had to guess, I would guess that you would get this issue on Monday.  I think that I will be able to publish on the following schedule … Saturday (because that is my usual day to publish and I am using that as my base point),  Monday (because that is two days after Saturday), Thursday (because that is two days after Monday if you skip Tuesday because that is darts nights and there really isn’t anything else that can go on that night because it’s pretty busy that night) and that brings us back around to Saturday again.  Does that sound fair to everyone?  Now, that’s with me working my regular work schedule.  If I have to go out of town, like I might have to do the first week of August, that might change things.  It might make it easier to publish, it might make it harder, I won’t really know until I get there.

They have asked me and a couple of other guys to drive out to Andrews AFB to help them build an exercise.  Usually a 9 to 5 kind of thing and depending on what kind of night life they have there, I may have plenty of time to write to you guys.  We’ll have to see.

If nothing else, I got the app on my phone so that I can send you guys some updates and some pictures from my trip.

ANYWAY … enough of that crap…let’s get to the fun stuff!!!!

I always like, “Oh, did you ever do Porn?”

Okay, we’ll do some beer quotes for the next little bit …

How do you know a man is thinking about his future?
He buys two cases of beer instead of one.

And there she is …

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.

Spilling a beer is the adult equivalent to losing a balloon.

24 hours in a day …

24 beers in a case …

Coincidence?

Life / Beer

are very similar …

CHILL

for best results.

Beergasm:  The climatic moment when you take that first sip of BEER at the end of the day.

I tried to be good …

But then the bonfire was lit and there was beer.

Therapy might help.  But so does sitting around a bonfire with a beer and the people you love.

When I was little I learned what schizophrenia was from TV and for a while I wa really afraid because I thought I had it since I always heard my own voice in my head so finally I told a doctor and he informed me that what I was experiencing was called thinking.

And obviously run-on sentences.

Yup, that’s how it’s done.  I’ve got friends like this … if you’re lucky, you do, too.

Burglar’s relative says: “He could have used a warning shot first…”

From WTTC News in Dallas, we get this heartwarming tale of a long-time criminal 33year old Deyfon Pipkin, who tried to climb in a window of a Texas home.

 

The elderly owner occupant saw him and fired one shot, ending Deyfon’s criminal career.

As the police do, they came by to investigate, gathered the corpse, then went to notify Deyfon’s family of his unfortunate demise. It seems that the family was very upset, because they showed up at the scene.
 
“He could have used a warning,” Lakesha Thompson, Pipkins’ sister-in-law, complained. “He could have let him know that he did have a gun on his property, and he would use it in self-defense.  How’s he gonna make a honest living for his family if some old dude who don’t need the money caps his ass first without a warning shot?”

COMMENTS FROM THE SIDELINE:

“That’s certainly true, Lakesha. He could also have invited him in and given him a beer, then helped him cart the TV out to the curb”.
 
“Unfortunately for Deyfon, Texas is a Castle Doctrine state, and the homeowner chose to shoot Deyfon, as is right and proper to do in Texas.
 
“For that matter, Lakesha, you could have warned Deyfon. Why didn’t YOU tell him: “Deyfon, yo’ needs to quit breakin’ into those peoples’ houses and stealin they shit.  Someone is goins to pop a cap in yo’ ass'”
 
“In light of the steadily increasing cost of ammunition, coupled with the rising scarcity of ammunition, a warning shot is a frivolous and unnecessary expense.”
 
“And, in this case a substantial savings of taxpayer money was a side result… no investigation expense, no jail time awaiting trial, no expense of a trial, and no prison costs after sentencing.

As a taxpayer … maybe not a Texas taxpayer, but a taxpayer none-the-less, I appreciate the savings.  And folks … I just pass the stories on, you can’t make this shit up.

Doctor said if I have the vasectomy, I wouldn’t have any kids … I had the operation, got home … they’re still fucking here …

The following is not a political ad …

Just an excuse to post boobs.

Exactly what we deserve at this point.

Got this special email from Tom J.

Greetings to you Impish and Mrs. Dragon also. I know I’m late, but I still want to say “Happy Anniversary to you both!” It’s hard to capture dragons in love on film but I have a special camera and was able to get this;

I celebrated with my special girl in June when we had our 42nd year of marriage. And you sure are right about the “best friend” because there could never be a better one!

I wish you another happy 25 years as you move towards the golden one.

Thanks for all the laughs and other things you bring us. You are the best.

Tom

Thank you ever so much for that Tom.  That’s very special and much appreciated by Mrs. Dragon and I.

Coincidentally, I received an email from Joe L in Beesley’s Point, NJ who is also celebrating 42, but his and Mrs. Joe are in November.  Lots of 42’s this year!  Congrats to you all!

It’s that time of the year again … well, it isn’t really, but we are doing it a little early this year due to popular demand … to pay the bills and we are looking for donations.  Every little bit helps.  Look for this link:

It resides in the upper right hand column.  And your donation helps to keep this little endeavor of mine going and keeps it ad free.  I’ve resisted for many, many years putting ads in here because I hate ads when I go to websites.  I truly do and I resolved that if I ever got to that point that I would quit doing it.  With your help over the years I haven’t had to do it and so far it’s worked out fairly well.  Here are the people we’ve got to thank so far this year:

Chuck G.     Donald G.     Ronald W.     Theodore K.     Mark M.     Michael C.     Steven H.     Joseph P.    Henry S.    Leah H.    Scott H.     William E.

What you have done is so generous, thank you so very much … and for those of you who are going to donate, thank you, also.  And for those of you who wish to, but can’t, thank you too.  No worries.  I understand and don’t wish anyone to do more than they can.

Now, let’s get back to the good stuff, shall we?  Yes, I think we shall …

How am I supposed to trust you, when you keep running away every time I untie you?

PUBS:  The official sunblock of Ireland

Never laugh at your wife’s choices … you are one of them.

I’m so busy I don’t whether I found a rope or lost a horse.

I’m more confused than a chameleon in a bag of skittles.

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God woman, eat a salad!

No, I don’t need Anger Management, you need to stop PISSING me off!

A little gray hair is a small price to pay for all this wisdom!

Some days the supply of curse words is insufficient to meet my demands.

Lynn sent me this link to a YouTube video that I believe is well worth watching.  Whether you believe or not, it will give you information you didn’t have before:

YouTube already trying to censor this video.

Watch before that happens and they take it down.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/-fhGV1LxeKQ

I imagine this is a favorite place for couples to have pictures taken.

And with that lovely picture fresh in your brain, we are going to end this issue right here and call it a day.

Love and Happiness to you all.

Cheers!