Dragon Laffs #1758


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Good Morning Campers,

A nice relaxing weekend.  By the time you guys are reading this, I’ll be working in the office on Monday morning.  I’ll try to let you guys know how it’s going.  It should be interesting getting back after so long away.

But, that’s all I’ve really got.  It was a quiet weekend, which is nice.  No real excitement, at least not by the time that I wrote this, so …

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One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says “Smell this” it usually smells nice.

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If I’m ever known as the one that got away …

It will be from an asylum.

This one, of course, if from Aussie Peter …

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Bozo criminal for today comes from Ridgefield, Connecticut where bozo James Lynch apparently partied a little too heartily. Our bozo, who’s 18 years old, returned home last Sunday night buck naked and driving an unfamiliar car. Now, our bozo thought he could slip into the house like nothing was out of the ordinary, but his father had some questions for him and stopped him in the hallway. When our bozo couldn’t come up with an explanation either for his nakedness or his new car, dad called the cops. After investigating our bozo’s activities, the cops charged him with burglary, larceny and criminal mischief.

Now that is what a father is supposed to do.

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Cop:  So, I’m writing you a ticket for driving alone in the carpool lane.
Criminal:  You’re going to feel really stupid when you look in my trunk!

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Thanks to Aussie Peter for that Public Service Announcement!

I swear this is my husband.  He will walk into the house, come upstairs, look around, and when I ask what he’s looking for . . . “Nothing”.  ~ Leah D

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Been out all day … putting Trump stickers on the rioters cars … sitting back watching them destroy each others cars.  When you have been quarantined for so long, you need a little entertainment and you the time to be creative.

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Maturity

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Maybe 10 years ago

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medical porn

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It is, perhaps, quite possible, that he is the only one going through the correct way and everyone else is backwards.

Unlikely, but possible.

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Has COVID-19 forced you to wear glasses and a mask at the same time?

You may be entitled to condensation.

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Okay, so let’s do some of this now …

Marsha M

I finally understand my dad’s feelings about the hippie of 1960s….they are running this country into the ground….protest…they did that. Down with the man….they did that…oh and I was a wee child but don’t think they liked police either. I do remember race riots…I was 8 or so and scared. What are we doing to our children? This news is everywhere and they must hear it….

The music of the day reflected it.  Listen to the 60’s rock and most of it is protest songs.  But, it was a different kind of protest then, too.  We were never this violent before…or maybe we were.  But the hippies were all about peace and love, smoking pot and getting high … now they’re all in politics and they’re all democrats.  I enjoyed peace and love and smoking pot and getting high, but I also know there’s a time and a place to get up and go to work, too.  But I’m not 16 anymore either.

Leah D

I was going to tell you, regarding your goodbye to daily issues, that you are “Going Out In Style”.
Then I found, like about everything I thought I knew, the meaning has changed.
~the old joke about a guy going into a (high fashion) store shooting himself saying that “he wanted to go out in style.”
~going out in style: Dying in a gunfight or armed robbery
~A man who shot eight people dead in a shopping mall before turning the gun on himself had earlier vowed to “go out in style”, local television said. I wonder if “go out in style” means “die famously” in this context.

Now this is closer to what I mean:
~in style done in a way that people admire, especially because it is unusual, shows great determination, or involves spending a lot of money . . . in great/grand/fine etc style
Minus the money part, that is more like what it meant where I grew up.

But what keeps circling through my brain, like a song you get stuck on, is Yogi Bear, “Exit, Stage Left”. No, Sorry! That has to do with all the current flip flop of all the politicians . . . .

Dang Leah, you make it sound like I’m going away forever … sniff … makes me want to cry!  And I’m not dying…geez!  LOL!  But, I understand your sentiment and thank you from the bottom of my big blue heart!

Maggie

Impish,,
a reply to Leah,, it was SNAGGLEPUSS, not YOGI who used to say exit stage left,, Yogi would say
his favorite self-promotion (“I’m smarter than the av-er-age bear!”), although he often overestimates his own cleverness.
I don’t know how old Leah is and I’m not asking but being 75 I kinda think, it’s amazing that I recall those 2 characters.
BTW the issues have been FANTASTIC !!!!!!
mAGGIE

Thanks Mags.  And I kept picturing a lion in my head, but couldn’t remember a name.  Seems we are all “of an age” as they used to say.

Cheers and thanks to you all.

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I really need one of these for work!!

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Bozo criminal for today comes from Lexington, South Carolina where bozo Gregory Schafer walked up to two youths sitting outside a house and showed them a business card identifying himself as an FBI agent. He then asked to use the phone inside the home. One of the youths said OK, but his mother, who was an actual FBI employee, immediately recognized our bozo as an imposter and called police who arrested him for impersonating a federal agent.

It takes a lot of stupidity to not only impersonate a federal officer, but then to do so to a real federal officer.  What a dumb ass

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I’m lucky that my wife and mother are very close. I realized just how close the time I drove my mother to her doctor, which my wife usually does. When the doctor came into the room, my own dear mother introduced me as her “daughter-in-law’s husband.”

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My girlfriend said to me last night, “You treat our relationship like some kind of game!” Which unfortunately cost her 12 points and a bonus chance.

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And that’s it for me for now.  Love you all, look forward to hearing from you.  Cheers my friends.  Talk to you all soon.

Impish Dragon

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4 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1758

  1. Leah D says:

    Thanks Maggie! In 1990, I had brain injury that left me not having to learn all over again from start, but more like opening my remember files. The trouble with that is, I have to come across the information again before the links to the files open. I am 72, and now, thanks to you, I remember Snagglepuss again! Do you remember the way Yogi would say “pick – a – nick basket”?

    • Maggie says:

      Leah,
      yes I remember,,, loved Yogi and Boo Boo, I miss the days of Saturday morning cartoons.
      I’m glad that you are remembering things,, somehow it’s better than forgetting things as we age. so far my memory is still pretty good. Hang in there and keep going
      Maggie

  2. Brenda J Camp says:

    really looking forward to all those e mails from lawyers for compensation for condensation…great bunch of stuff to see today and share with all my other quarantined in friends…better than all the drama I keep seeing every day….keep up the good work…

  3. James Churchill says:

    I would imagine the car backwards in the drive through is one of those Japanese imports with right hand drive.

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