Dragon Laffs #1749


Header1749

Good Morning Campers,

I’m at a loss as to what to say to you this morning.  Our President spoke last night, which was two or three nights ago for you guys (depending on when I get this issue out – and that is way up in the air right now because, as you can imagine, my life is way up in the air right now), and basically told the state Governors that if you can’t handle this situation, than I will.  People are being killed.  This has gone way over the top.  And I have even been having meetings about planned protests in my little area of Cornfield Indiana where I live.  I don’t know what to say.  This has to stop. 

Basically, President Trump has threatened to invoke the Insurrection Act of 1807, and from everything I’ve read, he can do it.  Use the military to quell the violence.  I really and truly hope and pray it doesn’t come to that, but when leaders of the black community are begging and pleading and telling these protestors that what they are doing is wrong … I don’t know.  I think it’s time for the legitimate protestors to go home.  You’ve made your point.  So many of them already have.  They say they don’t want any part of this shit, that this is not what they signed up for.  But so many others are just opportunistic ass-wipes that are going along with the agitators … who are being paid to keep this up and trust me when I tell you that it’s all political at this point.  

This just makes me sick.

So, I’m going on to other things.  I’m going to fucking laugh instead.  So fuck all you protestors, Dragon Laffs is going to laugh at all your bullshit!

1

1238

My ex tried to humiliate me by telling all her friends that I have a small dick.

Guess her reaction when they all disagreed.

1239

I’m pretty jealous of those two astronauts getting the hell off the planet …

1240

You don’t think people are doing shit just to cause trouble?

Illinois man charged with handing out ‘bombs’ during Minneapolis protests

By

Darryl Coote

June 2 (UPI) — Federal authorities have charged an Illinois man for crossing state lines into Minnesota where he filmed himself passing out explosive devices and urging people to throw them at police and buildings during nationwide unrest over the police-involved death of George Floyd.

Continued here:  https://www.upi.com/Top_News/US/2020/06/02/Illinois-man-charged-with-handing-out-bombs-during-Minneapolis-protests/4221591087722/

These are the ones!  These are the ones who need to be locked up and never let out!

1241

No shit!

I don’t know if I could ever “complete” someone.

But driving someone batshit crazy sounds doable.

403

Statistics show that once a burglar is infected by the AR-15 virus, they don’t burgle anymore …

and this next one goes so nicely with the last one …

405

Okay, I’m done.  LOL!

Congratulations!
You have successfully made it to the end of May!
Welcome to Level 6 of JUMANJI!

404

There’s an Oreo cookie?  I still don’t see an Oreo cookie!

Principal:  Your son is being bullied

Me:  He needs a sword.

Principal:  What? No, that would be …

Me: *Pulls out a sword*

Principal:  Whoa.  Hold on.  I don’t want any problems.

Me: *To Son* See what I mean.

406

See!  It’s not just me!!’’

The fact that my body cracks like a glowstick whenever I move and yet refuses to actually glow is very disappointing.

407

Yeah … I think I have at LEAST as many rounds as they could come up with as rioters and looters.

Okay, so I couldn’t resist this next one…

415

Everybody makes fun of the bald guy until the barber shops are all closed.  Then we’re the only ones who know how to cut our own hair.

408

They can … under normal circumstances … it might just take them a while … but I believe in self support and the second amendment. 

Day 22 of no Pub!  I fell off my stool in the kitchen to bring back some memories.

409

Very subtle … but one of my favorite songs … and now jokes!

Eugene Levy and his wife invited me to a non-alcoholic party.

Drove my Chevy to the Levys but the Levys were dry …

3

411

410

412

coollogo_com-5740339

Justin Bieber

Just-kidding

juxtaposition

Karate

Karma

Karma2

Karma15

Keep your eye on the ball

Keeping up with the Cardassians

Key chains

Keystone_Samurai

KFC

Khol's does what

Kids

killemall

413

About half and half …

If I take a job at a poultry farm, does that make me a Chicken Tender??

414

416

Damn!  Come over to my house!!

If Watson isn’t the most famous Doctor, then Who is.

Oh, come on!  Really?

1242

Did You Know: (You gonna start this shit again?) Tulip bulbs were once used as currency in Holland.  Well … hey … no … I didn’t know that and that’s actually pretty cool and makes some sense since Holland is the like the Tulip capital of the world and all and … okay … enough …

417

Did You Know: (See what you started!)  Wooly Mammoths were still roaming the earth when the Pyramids of Giza were being built.  So the space aliens who built the pyramids used wooly mammoths to move the big stones?  Is that what I’m hearing, here?

1243

I gotta get me one of those cups!!!!

So … in order to enter stores now, do I need to bring a face mask or a brick?

2020 is confusing.

Okay, so it’s not funny … but it is.

1244

Well, yeah!  That’s what you said you wanted!!

Every refrigerator has a crisper drawer … which is a great place to hide your vegetables while they rot.

1245

I think that is enough battling of the bullshit for one day, besides I have a protest meeting at the Sheriff’s office I have to get to.

LOL!  I just reread that last line and it makes it sound like the Sheriff’s Department is going to protest.  Wouldn’t that be something.  Oh well. 

Love and Laughter to you all, until we talk again dear friends.

Cheers!

Impish Dragon.

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1749

  1. Danny says:

    I have subscribed to other humor sites in the past but none compare to yours–not even close. I deeply appreciate the humor you provide. There’s now only one other humor page that I follow now but it is still far short of what we get here.

  2. Leah D. says:

    As far as I know, no one has announced an end to this protesting. I get the feeling it will go on through the week, and the weekend? I’m just hoping it isn’t slated to end with a huge Fireworks display!
    I believe the reason the protests have remained calm in Salt Lake City, is because of the Extreme Show of Force (it was exhilarating!) the first day when they burned two cars. They have already identified and arrested, one of the punks that lit up the cop car.
    They opened the State Parks, which is responsible for the South West corner of Utah ending up a Covid Hotspot. Our numbers began climbing then, and since Memorial Day, have continued going up. Meanwhile, they started moving most everyone to Orange, and now practically all of the State is Yellow, and the numbers kept climbing. Then the protests . . .
    Everyone “out there” is telling me virtually no one is wearing Masks, practicing Social Distancing. I hear Walmart is no where as busy as they were before the let the Re-Opening begin. Obviously, people were using it as a Source of Entertainment, a way to get out of the house.
    I think my husband and I, along with others, will be in Isolation, forever. July brings the 4th, and the 24th, which is our State Holiday, and more Hotspots, then IF they open the schools (which starts the end of August in Utah), Covid will attend, then Fall, and the regular Flu Season (starts in Utah as soon as the ski resorts open) . . . . see what I mean?
    I had an appointment with my doctor, which was a phone call. He said he had the virus early in March . . . a patient gave it to him. He is staying isolated, since they still don’t know if having it gives you immunity.
    My brother’s “Celebration of His Life” is Saturday, and none of his siblings will be there. My other brother was with him when he died, but his doctor told him not to go this Saturday. He lives in a County that has stayed clean.
    My doctor brought up depression. I’m not Depressed, I am Angry! and I can’t even start a riot!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s