Good Morning Mom, Mothers, Sons and Daughters of Mothers, and all of you campers… although that last was unnecessary since everyone should fall into the other categories… I hope you are having a truly wonderful day.

So…tomorrow is Mother’s Day.  And I want to take the opportunity to tell you all…

 

So, with that, let’s laugh a little with our moms…

I told my psychiatrist that I’ve been hearing voices.

He told me that I don’t have a psychiatrist.

And speaking of psychiatrists, I love reading the vanity cards at the end of Chuck Lorre’s shows like The Big Bang Theory or Young Sheldon.  Here’s the latest:

CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #264

A guy goes into a dentist’s office. The dentist says, “How can I help you?”

The guy says, “I’m a moth.”

The dentist says, “Excuse me?”

The guy says again, “I’m a moth.”

The dentist says, “I think maybe you should be seeing a psychiatrist, not a dentist.”

The guy says, “I saw a psychiatrist.”

The dentist says, “So what are you doing here?”

The guy says…

(SEE PUNCH LINE IN VANITY CARD #265 AT END OF TONIGHT’S EPISODE OF THE BIG BANG THEORY)

CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #265

“Your light was on.”

Why is it called boob sweat and not humidititties?

 

“Mom Brain” is like dial up internet.  There are 17 tabs open, 9 of them are not responding, there are thousands of pop ups and where the fuck is that music coming from?

Me: I can’t Salsa Dance.
Alcohol: Oh, yes you fucking can.

I’d like to think I will die a heroic death, but it’s more likely I’ll trip over my dog and choke on a spoonful of frosting.

So I was just wondering…does 3 glasses of wine and 2 Bloody Marys equal 5 servings of fruits and vegetables?

I want to go jogging in the morning, but Proverbs 28:1 says, “The wicked runs when no one is chasing them.” So, there goes that.

So, in closing, I’d like to share some recent vacation photos with you.  And despite evidence to the contrary, I had nothing to do with the volcano!

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend, and that all you mothers have a great day!  I love you, mom!

Cheers,

Impish Dragon