Dragon Laffs #1478


Header1478

Good Morning Campers,

I’ve had an interesting week. 

So, Monday I called the dentist because I had a lot of pain in my jaw and in one tooth.  Dentist comes in, looks and says, “It’s got to go.”  So Tuesday, I’m a tooth short of what Identist had over the weekend.  Although I am missing a tooth, I’ve been given added pain, so it’s a trade-off. (Yes, for those of you who aren’t quite awake yet, that was sarcasm.  Just so you know.)

Tuesday is darts night for me and I had a pretty good night.  But what I wanted to mention here is the most interesting of shots I had.  I took a picture of it.

2a

It’s called “Robin Hooding” the dart.  Here, let me give you a closer look:
2b

You can see where the second dart actually split the flight of the first one.  And as accurate as that shot was, it didn’t count.  Because the only darts that count are the ones that actually touch the dartboard.  It would’ve been the third sixteen I needed to close out the sixteen’s in Cricket.

Cool shot anyway.

Wednesday I got some really bad news and spent the whole day in meetings, so applausewe won’t dwell on Wednesday other than to say, Wasn’t Lethal’s Leprechaun Laffs excellent on Wednesday?  I’m not sure that his experiments with weather and trying to give me snow didn’t work…at least partially … with all the rain we’ve had this week, had it actually been snow, he definitely would have gotten the blizzard he was looking for.  Converting actual rain to potential snow, we would’ve had about 2 ½ feet of snow.  But, due to either some glitch in the formula or Mother Nature’s interference, we got rain instead of snow. 

Thursday saw me having a crazy day at work and not accomplishing much of anything else.  Didn’t even work my normal household chores because of the very long work day…well and the aching jaw I still have after that dentist visit!

And that brings us up to Friday, which is now…well, it’s now for me, now, but it won’t be now for your when you read this, because your now will be different from my current now. But my now is right now and I’m writing this now, so it’s got to be your now, too while you’re reading it, but it’s not now, it’s then.


um…
Yeah, sort of.

Okay, now my head hurts trying to work all that out.  So, let’s just get right to it:

coollogo_com-166981397

1846

When Bill Clinton was in office, a very important meeting took place among God, the Pope and Moses.
They were troubled because the President of the United States was behaving in an inappropriate manner, and there were many people who saw nothing wrong with what he had done.
They decided that the only course of action left was to create an ’11th Commandment,’ to get their message across.
Now, the problem remained exactly how to *word* this new Commandment so that it matched the other Commandments both in style and holy inspiration. After great meditation and discussion they concluded:
“Thou shalt not comfort thy rod with thy staff.”

1847

M&Ms with obstacles.  Perfect.  That could be the perfect analogy for my life.  Striving for the M&Ms (The Good Life) and having to avoid the evil almonds (Unplanned for debt like care repairs and household problems), despicable raisins (actually I like raisins, but for this analogy, let’s call them the stupid people…left wing loonies, democratic dunces, anti-gun morons, you know the ones), problematic peanuts, and those awful annoying sunflower seeds that are just a plain nuisance.  Who eats those things, anyway? They’re small, they get stuck in your teeth and the shell is a pain to get through. 

Yeah, M&Ms with obstacles.  Perfect.

 

coollogo_com-258205249

I found this quite interesting.  Seems like Russian trained Chechen Spetznaz troops are undercover in ISIS and providing detailed information.  Do you think we have assets undercover in ISIS giving back information?  Other than our own administration, that is.

SPETZNAZ UNDERCOVER AMONG ISIS DIRECTING RUSSIAN AIRSTRIKES

21STCENTURYWIRE

FKTV – Alexandra Bruce – March 5, 2016breaking-news

It has recently come to light that the a major reason for Russia’s success in the battle against ISIS is due largely to the Chechen units of the Russian Spetznaz (special forces), that have infiltrated ISIS in both Iraq and Syria, since the very beginning.

Chechen President, Ramzan Kadyrov explains that long before the term ISIS became an international buzzword, he was aware of the Western operated training camps for so-called “moderate rebels”, so he ordered Chechen Spetznaz soldiers to join ISIS.

“Our soldiers went through training at NATO bases and helped to found the Syrian State [ISIS]. They wear clothes common for ISIS and look like them.”

Thus, a large network of Chechen agents was established throughout ISIS since the very beginning, collecting vital information with powerful results, when Chechen agents began coordinating their on-the-ground intelligence with Russia’s air campaign.

Kadyrov apparently feels secure in speaking so openly about the operation because he is confident that the Chechen men are so deeply entrenched, all with fake passports, etc. that they will never be caught.

These revelations being made now about the the operation may well be a tactical move, to create more chaos and confusion within the already collapsing terror group.

I would not be surprised at all to find out that this is one big dis-information tactic to get ISIS chasing after its own tail.  Time will tell.

1848

A blonde is terribly overweight so her doctor put her on a diet. “I want you to eat regularly for two days then skip a day and repeat this procedure for two weeks.Blonde, dumb The next time I see you you’ll have lost at least five pounds.”
 
When the blonde returned she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds.
 
“Why that’s amazing!” the doctor said”Did you follow my instructions?”
 
The blonde nodded… “I’ll tell you though I thought I was going to drop dead that third day.”
 
“From hunger you mean? “asked the doctor.”
 
“No from skipping.”

Okay, well it’s time. 

We skipped it last week and now I have a plethora of them.

So, I have to put them in here and now before they start multiplying and getting completely out of control.

What are we talking about, you ask?

coollogo_com-140101225

It’s fun!  Let’s do this!
1

Oh yes.  Our fearless leader (feckless leader?) has got to keep his priorities in line.  (Okay, so I just looked up the definition of “feckless”.  One of those words I’ve heard a million times and thought I knew what it meant, but you look it up to be sure.  Well, here’s the definition:
adjective

1. ineffective; incompetent; futile:

feckless attempts to repair the plumbing.
2.having no sense of responsibility; indifferent; lazy.
So, it turns out that “feckless leader” is a much more appropriate term).  Let’s move on, shall we?
1a

And another great example.  I’ll not need to comment on this one.

1a1Did you see where there are petitions going around for Bill’s arrest for illegally campaigning for Hillary at polling places?  Maybe we can get them to share a cell.  Wouldn’t that be a karmic ending!

1bYeah, maybe more so than the others, but I’m not sure even THIS kind of beheading will get much of a rise out of him.

1cAnd therein lies the REAL reason the democrats are pushing so hard for amnesty.

1g

Amen!  At the current time, it’s almost a 1:1 ratio, with one worker for every one person on some sort of government handout.  That means that since I’m the sole provider in my household, I’m providing for not only my wife and daughter, but for some other 3 person family.  I wonder if I can take those other three off on my taxes?  Probably not.

1h

coollogo_com-87533716

Untitled-TrueColor-10

“HEY!  Close the damn door!  Can’t you see I’m busy in here!?”

 

1849

One of the things that ALL of us pay attention to, talk about and are concerned for is….
The Weather!
I know, it’s not the most exciting of topics unless you’re in the way of some of the nasty stuff, but it can be fun.  Watch this:

Yeah, cartoon eyeballs.  That’s exactly what that looks like.

 

1850

Oh, if it were only that easy!!!

Two blondes were walking down the road and the firstblonde blonde said, “Look at that dog with one eye!”

The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says, “Where?” 

1851

The General went out to the check point to find that none of his G. I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily. “Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see, I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the bus, but missed it; I hailed a cab, but it broke down; found a farm, bought a horse, but it dropped dead; ten miles a-running, and now I’m here.” The General was very skeptical about this explanation, but at least he was here so he let the G. I. go. Moments later, eight more G. I.s came up to the general, panting; he asked them why they were late. “Sorry, sir! I had a date and it ran a little late, so I ran to the bus — but missed it, I hailed a cab, but it broke down; found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I’m here.” The General eyed them, feeling very skeptical but since he let the first guy go, he let them go, too. A tenth G. I. jogged up to the General, panting heavily. “Sorry, sir! I had a hot date and it ran a little late, I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but…” “Let me guess,” the General interrupted, “it broke down.” “No,” replied the G. I., “there were so many dead horses in the road, it took forever to get around them!”

1852

coollogo_com-188182396

f2010041101

A very dedicated fan of Dragon Laffs!

1853

Yum!!  Black Forest Ham!  I’ve got to find this forest!  You guys go ahead and keep reading I’ll be back in a little bit!
d17

 

Jeannie…or maybe Gracie…sent me this next one and I have to agree with her title, What the hell is going on in Oakland?!

This is CRAZY!  No respect for other people, no respect for law enforcement, no enforcement of the law by law enforcement.  This is the perfect example of the entitlement mentality that way too many young people have today.  This is pure bullshit!  Makes what we did as kids seem like kindergarten.

Why are there riots?  Why are there demonstrations that get violent?  Because when someone finally says they’ve had enough or when police have to take a stand and know they are going to be in danger (these slimeballs were actually throwing bottles at police vehicles and the police departed!) they feel like they are not getting everything they are entitled to and act out like animals.

Then on the news today is the story of two drunk women on a plane playing a boom box.  Okay, that’s rude!  Well, when asked to turn it down they turned it up and said, “What are you going to do about it?”  So, other women on the plane jump up and there is a fist fight at 30,000 feet!  Shit like that would have NEVER happened even a couple of years ago!  Now, I can do whatever I want…it’s my right!  (Maybe modeling behavior after our president who thinks he can do whatever he wants with executive orders?).  Oh,  by the way, you know how many people were arrested and charged?  ZERO!

What the hell is going on in Oakland?  The same damn thing that is starting to happen all over.  If you continue to watch videos after the above, you will see more videos of people behaving badly in many different places.  It sickens me and makes me so glad I live in a podunk little town and not in a big city.

1854

Mitt Romney and Senator John McCain issued statements Thursday in which they described Donald Trump as a threat to democracy. You can see their point. Allowing the American people to select their nominee over the establishment’s carefully screened candidates is simply undemocratic.  (For those of you who are still waking up, yes, that also was sarcasm.)

1855

coollogo_com-179202273

a10

a11

a12

a13

a14

1856

I’ve been in the Wong Fook Hing Book Store many times.

Nancy Regan, an iconic American, passed this week.  I think this picture perfectly describes her:
2c

And one more that I just found:
2d

 

The Differences Between A Republican and A Democrat:

Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person.

Donald Trump gave the homeless person his business card and told him to come to his office for a job.  He then took $20 out of his pocket and gave it to the homeless person.

Hillary saw this, so when they came to another homeless person she walked over to the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare office.  She then reached into Donald’s pocket and got out $20.  She kept $15 for “administrative fees” and gave the homeless person $5. 

Now do you understand the difference?

coollogo_com-167001037

itsatrap

Jackpot

Jailbait

jailbait1

Jailbait2

Jammed Door

1857

I like this Brit.  I’ve given him airtime in the past, and this time he’s making just as much sense as he did before.

1858

coollogo_com-202034957

And for our Last Word, another perspective on what is currently going on with our political system…

When was the last time you could vote for the ideal candidate?  I’m old, and I have always voted.   I can’t remember ever thinking any candidates were ideal.  We always have two choices; usually Tweedledee and Tweedledum.  If you didn’t vote for Tweedledee you got Tweedledum.   That’s the way it is folks.
Now consider this …
 
You’ve been on vacation for two weeks, you come home, and your basement is infested with raccoons.  Hundreds of rabid, messy, mean, raccoons have over taken your basement.
 
You want them gone immediately, so you hire a guy. A pro. You don’t care if the guy smells, you need those raccoons gone pronto and he’s the guy to do it! You don’t care if the guy swears, you don’t care if he’s an alcoholic, you don’t care how many times he’s been married, you don’t care if he has plumber’s crack…you simply want those raccoons gone!  You want your problem fixed!  He’s the guy. He’s the best. Period.
 
That’s why Trump.  Yes, he’s a bit of an ass.   Yes, he’s an egomaniac, but you don’t care. The country is a mess because politicians are playing games and we are all sick and tired of Tweedledee and Tweedledum choices.  The Democrats are killing us, the Republican Party is gutless, liberals don’t have a clue, and illegals are everywhere. You want it all fixed!
 
You don’t care that Trump is crude, you don’t care that he insults people, you don’t care that he has been friendly with Hillary, you don’t care that he’s been married 3 times,  you don’t care that he fights with Megyn Kelly and Rosie O’Donnell, you don’t care that he doesn’t know the name of some Muslim terrorist,…this country is weak & bankrupt, our enemies are making fun of us, we are being invaded by illegal’s, we are becoming a nation of victims where every Tom, Ricardo and Ahmid is a special group with special rights – – – to a point where we don’t even recognize the country we were born and raised in; “AND WE JUST WANT IT FIXED”. 
 
Trump is the only guy who seems to understand what the people want.  We’re sick of politicians, sick of the Democrat and Republican Parties, and sick of illegal’s. You just want this thing fixed.
 
Trump may not be a saint, but no person or company he has ever done business with has ever come forward and called him corrupt, or hard to do business with.   He doesn’t have lobbyist money holding him, and he doesn’t have political correctness restraining him.  All you know is that he has been well educated at the university of Pennsylvania business school, seems to have boundless energy, has been very successful, is a good negotiator, has built a lot of things, and is not a cowardly, deceitful, professional, politician.   And he says he’ll fix it.

You don’t care if the guy has bad hair.

 
You just want those raccoons gone.
Out of your house!.
 
Now!!!!
 
THIS MAY BE WHY HE LEADS THE POLLS.
And now…he’s being supported by Dr. Ben Carson.
Until we meet again next week.
May your lives be blessed with happiness and laughter.
Impish Dragon
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1478

  1. ginny says:

    Sounds like you had the week from “HELL”…well it didn’t reflect in your issue for today. You are so right on the candidates to vote for….”BAD”…not “SO BAD”. I’m going into overload with the rallies….the debates….and follow ups. Well hope your were off for the weekend…and your work week will be much improved from last week.

    • impishdragon says:

      Ginny, Leah, Alan and all the others who wrote here and privately, thank you very much for your concern over my tooth. (Really never thought I’d use that sentence anywhere) I’m doing okay. It’s tough to eat at the moment, but thank God I can still drink coffee and alcoholic beverages.
      Okay, so I’m really not much of a drinker, but it’s still nice to have a bit of a tipple now and then.
      I’m glad you all liked the issue and found something to laugh at and light a fire under you over. Leah, that was a great analogy comparing my tooth to the current political climate.
      I look forward to hearing from you all of you guys and I want to thank you for taking the time to post a comment.
      Cheers,
      Impish Dragon

  2. Leah D says:

    GREAT ISSUE!
    Your tooth is a good example of the current political situation. We have a rotten president, who needs to be removed. However, he could be replaced with the pain in the ass Trump.
    The last part, about why Donald Trump is leading in the polls was sent to me by my sister in law, in answer to my comments about how mortified I would be if Trump was president. I would be embarrassed by his arrogance, and his childish, two year old behavior.
    I want to THANK TRUMP for running, for defining what the platform of the GOP should be, for making everyone aware that we have had enough. But now that he has done that job, I sure hope he doesn’t win and also that whomever does, remembers the valuable information Trump brought forward, and carries on with making things right again.

  3. alan says:

    Good video of the Brit. A wise man.
    Maybe a shame that Trump necessary is, but necessary he is!!

  4. Ginny says:

    Great issue….so how’s the tooth?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s