Leprechaun Laughs # 267 for Wednesday Oct 8th 2014


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You enter to see the conference room has been rearranged some. The craft table that had always been in the back of the room is now down front and considerably smaller and fancier. There is no way there is enough food or coffee on the table for 50 people let alone 450. The quality also seems markedly better than the norm. Some new very plush seating has been installed down forward and you can see that many of the seats have what appear to be brass name tags on the back of them. Access to the area seems to be restricted and the vast majority of those who approach are turn away and refused entry to the area by two very insistent CyberLethals who direct those not admitted to what they are refer to as the Bleacher seating. Turning your attention to this area you see rough hewn benches have replaced the previous upholstered auditorium style seating. You can see Ginny & Diamen seated down front along with another habitual early arrival K-Squared.  Two more CyberLethals seem to be moving among the bleacher seats stopping at certain folks whom are Vet’s or disabled and assisting/directing them to to the restricted access area and one of the seats sans name tags where they are greeted warmly by Lethal.  Lethal moves back and forth between talking with those in the new seats and glaring seemingly perturbed at the rest of you.  As soon as the new area is filled Lethal climbs on stage and mounts the podium without waiting for the benches to fill.

Alright! Put a bloody sock in it already! You’re too bleedin’ right there’s been some change hereabouts. Excuse me? I didn’t catch that from back there in Ambivalence Apathy Cheep Skates & Freeloaders Area. You want to know where your Coffee is? It’s down at the Donut Shop in the mezzanine along with your pastry and should set you back anywhere between $3.75 & $5 depending on what you order. This stuff down front? Sorry, that’s only for our loyal supporters who answered our donations call and hence forth have preferred readership status.

See Impish’s issue sort of cheesed me off, well to be honest,  I had other words in mind to describe my reaction but Molly, our censor, and our corporate legal team all had fits of apoplexy when I ran my rough draft remarks past them. Loyal Supporters- I thank you for your largess and assistance keeping the doors open and the lights on for another year. I have to warn you though, your efforts might be damned short lived and we might just be refunding those donations. This is the point where you put those noise canceling headphones in the pockets of your seats on and listen the the music station of your choice. I’ve  few remarks for the rest of this rabble and I do not wish to upset or offend you, because frankly I AM upset and offended by them.

18 wonderfully generous people have donated to help us keep this going. A lousy. Stinking. 4 measly percent. We didn’t ask for $20, not $10, hell we didn’t even ask for a $5. ONE DAMNED DOLLAR! That was ALL we asked for! Now I understand that possibly to some of you that dollar represents your lunch budget for the day and I’m not asking you to cough that last dollar up for us. However don’t try pissing on my leg and telling me its raining with the story that’s the situation with all remaining 429 of you non donors!

I sent Impish an e-mail today, I’m sure he’ll read it in the morning as like me he was busy working his ass off, got called into work last night on an emergency but still manage to find time to get the issue out for you 429 who apparently don’t even think it’s worth a stinking buck a year. In that e-mail I told him its my feeling that if we cannot get 10% of you to donate regardless of how much it is then we’re wasting our time here and might as well draw the line in the sand and say “No further! We’re insulted, mad as hell and not taking slap in the face laying down again this year!”

See I got a little wake up call this week from my Programing Professor. Apparently my work in class has been good enough that he’s turned me on to the possibility of working from home as a subcontractor,  doing some changes to existing programs in the language I’m learning. A local company wants to hire some students with the possibility of going full time once I finish my certificate. RIGHT NOW I can be using the 4 to 6 hours a week I spend getting LL out and administrating the blog on updating and cleaning up their programs FOR $18/hr.!

That’s an extra $350 per month or just over $4200/year IN MY POCKET AFTER TAXES.  On the other hand there are you 429 freeloaders who can’t even be bothered to donate a lousy buck, something you’d think nothing of giving to a bum or homeless guy just to get rid of him but won’t give to keep us around. Any wonder I’m looking at this the way I am?

Don’t think I’m the only bad guy here. Impish is on board with my point of view and agrees.  In fact he liked what I had to say last week about the situation and encouraged me to amplify on it this week. Of course when he said that he had NO idea what  effect his facts and figure were going to have on my Leprechaunish temper. HELL  since I’m speaking the plain truth I’ll even admit he’s read and APPROVED this message. He’d probably like to have said it himself but he’s just too polite, diplomatic and reserved to be as direct upfront and blunt about it as I am.

I can understand if you are leery about using a credit card or debit card online or frightened of PayPal retaining your data given all the stuff in the news lately. However Impish has said to contact him and he’s give you his address to send a check to. Here is the email address for contact so you have no excuses:

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‘But Lethal! It’ll costs almost the $1 I’m going to send to send it by check!””’ I can hear some of you whining already. Let me just say-

1.) Not my problem, even at $2 spent (and us only getting one of them) that’s still a damned cheap subscription price!

2.) Do I look like an idiot? Put the $1 bill in a sheet of paper stick it in the envelope and save the cost of the check then! Don’t tell me you don’t do that with Birthday Cards still!  If you’re sending us more (like a stack of untraceable bills) I suggest one of those padded manila envelopes and reinforcing the top and bottom with tape. The point is cash is happily and gratefully accepted so you have no excuse.

Today is OCT 8th. We limit our fund raising requests to 2 weeks both because we don’t like begging and can’t stand the insulting lack of support being rubbed in our faces any longer than that. This year’s Drive closes at Midnight on Saturday the 11th.

I want to see donations from 45 people total that’s 10% of you. NO I will NOT count Ginny twice or anyone else who ups their donation. That’s not fair to them to expect them to give to save your sorry butts from having to. I don’t care if its just the lousy dollar we asked for- that was all we ever wanted in the first place. Just one dollar from each of you!

NOW what I want is the 10% participation number.

If not, on Sunday next, Impish and I WILL be having a frank and hard talk about what happens next and you can bet that dollar you saved that something WILL happen and the vast majority of you won’t like it.

As for you kind supporters who donated, our known Vet’s and those whom we already know are legitimately on a fixed income &/or disabled fear not. First let me say that while we will happily accept donations from our Vet’s and those who are less abled we will not be making it a requirement for your inclusion in the possible evolution of the blog. Our Vet’s have certainly already paid their subscription to basically anything we do in our opinions and as for those differently abled folks lets say we identify and understand that other things legitimately take priority and have no intention of making you choose between you necessities and us. Secondly, when have you known for there not to be a plan in my mad ranting?  I’ve something in mind to keep you folks happy and any others who wisely choose to join you. It might take us a bit of doing and might not happen before the blog would close but it will happen. We love you guys as much as you love us and you don’t deserve the same fate as the rest of the readership.

Oh, and as for you folks who regularly send us stuff to include or make comments regular and are thinking this doesn’t mean/include me? THINK AGAIN! Talk is cheap. Actions speak much louder and clearer than words. Hitting ‘Forward’ on an email is easy and painless. Everyone is your friend until they have to do something  for that friendship. Time for you too to put a dollar where your forwarding button is.

You hear a rattling overhead and see a chain mesh security curtain like the ones on closed stores at the mall descending between the benches and the Red Roped off area extending wall to wall.

Now if you skinflint blog welfarians will excuse us, the Loyal Supporters Club and I have a ‘Breakfast with the Dragon and Leprechaun Buffet’ function to attend in the Executive Dining Room to thank them for not having to twist their arms. The rest of you will have to make do with the issue. Enjoy it as it’s probably one of the last most of you’ll be receiving. I suggest you keep a close eye on the participation level Impish’s Donation Updates I’m sure after he reads this there will be one.

Opening Logo 6

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Must be why he’s such a T-shirt reader. I think he keeps hoping to find one in braille!

TRAVEL PLANS FOR 2015

I have been in many places, but I’ve never been in Kahoots. Apparently, you can’t go alone. You have to be in Kahoots with someone.

I’ve also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.

I have, however, been in Sane. They don’t have an airport; you have to be driven there.  I have made several trips there, thanks to my children, friends, family and work.

I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I’m not too much on physical activity anymore.

I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often. I’ve been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.

Sometimes I’m in Capable, and I go there more often as I’m getting older. One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense! It  really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need  all the stimuli I can get!

I may have been in Continent, but I don’t remember what country I was in. It’s an age thing. They tell me it is very wet and damp there!

I hope everyone is happy in your head – we’re all doing pretty well in mine!

From a former world traveler!

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10 Reasons I’m Not a Democrat: PART II

 

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Stovetop Lasagna

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Total Time: 30 min
Prep: 10 min
Cook: 20 min
Yield: 4 servings
Level: Easy

 

 

 

 

Ingredients

Kosher salt
7 lasagna noodles (about 4 ounces)
1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil, plus more for drizzling
1 pound ground meatloaf mix, such as beef, pork and veal
2 cups tomato sauce
1/8 teaspoon red pepper flakes
3 cups baby spinach
1/3 cup ricotta cheese
1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
6 tablespoons grated parmesan cheese
1/4 cup thinly sliced fresh basil

Directions

Preheat the broiler. Fill a wide pot with 3 inches of salted water and bring to a boil. Add the noodles and cook until al dente, about 11 minutes, then drain, transfer to a cutting board and halve crosswise.

Meanwhile, heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add the ground meat and cook, stirring, until browned. Add the tomato sauce and red pepper flakes and simmer 5 minutes. Add the spinach and stir until it wilts, then add the ricotta and bring to a low simmer. Season with salt and remove from the heat. Toss the mozzarella and 4 tablespoons parmesan in a bowl.

Cover the bottom of an 8-inch-square baking dish with a layer of slightly overlapping lasagna noodles. Top with half of the meat sauce and half of the cheese mixture. Repeat with another layer of noodles and the remaining meat sauce and cheese mixture. Cover with the remaining noodles and sprinkle with the remaining 2 tablespoons parmesan. Drizzle lightly with olive oil and broil until golden and bubbling, 3 to 5 minutes. Top with the basil.

Per serving: Calories 671; Fat 33 g (Saturated 14 g); Cholesterol 123 mg; Sodium 747 mg; Carbohydrate 49 g; Fiber 5 g; Protein 44 g

Beef Taco Noodle Casserole

Egg noodle casserole recipe with seasoned ground beef, Southwest vegetables, tomatoes and cheese

 

 

 

Prep time: 15 min

Cooking Time 30 min

Total: 45

Makes: 6 servings (1/6th recipe each)

Ingredients:

  • No-Stick Cooking Spray
  • 6 ounces  Extra Wide Egg Noodles, uncooked
  • 1 pound ground chuck beef (80% lean)
  • 2 cups frozen Southwest mixed vegetables (corn, black beans, red peppers)
  • 1 can (10 oz. ) Diced Tomatoes & Green Chilies, undrained
  • 1 can (10 oz. ) red enchilada sauce
  • 1-1/4 cups water
  • 1-1/4 cups shredded Mexican blend cheese
  • 1/4 cup thinly sliced green onions
  • Sour cream, optional

Directions

  1. Preheat oven to 400°F. Spray 13×9-inch glass baking dish with cooking spray. Place uncooked noodles in baking dish.
  2. Heat large skillet over medium-high heat. Add beef; cook 5 to 7 minutes or until crumbled and no longer pink. Drain. Add vegetables, undrained tomatoes, enchilada sauce and water to skillet; stir. Bring to a boil. Pour mixture over noodles.
  3. Cover dish tightly with foil; bake 15 minutes. Stir; sprinkle with cheese and cover with foil. Bake 10 minutes more or until noodles are tender. Sprinkle with green onions. Serve with sour cream, if desired.

Nutritional Information:

6 servings (1/6th recipe each) Calories 413; Total Fat 19 g (Saturated Fat 8 g); Cholesterol 101 mg; Sodium 598 mg; Carbohydrate 33 g; (Dietary Fiber 5 g, Sugars 5 g); Protein 26 g; Percent Daily Values*: Vitamin A 7%; Vitamin C 30%; Calcium 20%; Iron 18%

* Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet.

Recipe Warning

 

Salted Caramel Mocha Brownies

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Yield – 16 brownies

Preparation Time – 10 minutes

Cooking Time – 35 minutes

Ingredients

  • 2 ounces semisweet baking chocolate, chopped
  • 1/2 cup butter
  • 2 cups chocolate chips, divided
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • 1/2 cup all-purpose flour
  • 2 tablespoons cocoa powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 packet (or 1 tablespoon) instant coffee granules
  • 1/2 cup of caramel bits
  • about 2 tsp. sea salt

Directions

  • Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Grease an 8×8-inch glass baking dish with nonstick cooking spray.
  • In a large, microwave-safe mixing bowl, add the chopped baking chocolate, butter, and 1 cup of the chocolate chips. Microwave on high for 11⁄2 minutes. Whisk the melted butter into the melted chocolate.
  • Whisk the sugar, vanilla, flour, cocoa powder, and salt into the butter-chocolate mixture. Whisk the eggs and instant coffee granules into the batter. Whisk for about 1 minute, or until the batter is smooth. Fold in the remaining 1 cup chocolate chips and then stir in the caramel bits. Drop the sea salt all over the top of the batter, pinchful at a time.
  • Pour the batter into the greased baking dish. Bake in the preheated oven for 30 to 35 minutes until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Let cool slightly before cutting and serving.

Carmel bits are something relatively new and available in the baking aisle near the chocolate chips.

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Aircraft Hits Buildings

This is tough to see. It just shows the dangers of attending these events.        

Amazing photo below shows great detail.

The pilot at low level had no control over his aircraft.

It narrowly misses a crowd gathered for the air show and slams into four buildings.
One can only imagine the horror of the occupants inside those buildings.

No one was killed, but it probably scared the crap out of them.

!cid_X_MA1_1412090771@aol

Unfortunately as I understand it there was no permanent damage to any of the buildings in the Obama Presidential Library and Muslim Cultural Center Complex

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ideas_for_the_weekend_20_photos16_1411880524

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Coast guard rescues man running across ocean in an inflatable bubble

NN – An ultra-marathoner trying to “run” from Florida to Bermuda in a human-powered inflatable bubble was rescued Saturday morning after he signaled for help, the Coast Guard said.

Reza Baluchi, according to his website, has set a goal of running across more than 190 recognized nations to encourage world peace.

The Coast Guard first encountered Baluchi on Wednesday after receiving a report about a man in a bubble off the coast of Miami, disoriented and asking for directions to Bermuda, a Coast Guard press release said. It was not clear when he started his quest.

A Coast Guard cutter found Baluchi. Officials described the craft as a “hydro pod bubble” and a man in a 2013 YouTube video called a Baluchi bubble “a big hamster wheel.” It moved along the ground as Baluchi ran inside.

In the press release, the Coast Guard said Baluchi had protein bars, bottled water, a GPS and a satellite phone. The Coast Guard conveyed the voyage’s dangers and asked Baluchi to quit his journey because he didn’t have enough supplies. But he wouldn’t leave his vessel, officials said.

The Coast Guard monitored his progress and on Saturday morning an exhausted Baluchi activated his personal locating beacon, the Coast Guard said.

A Coast Guard HC-130 airplane and MH-60 helicopter, along with the vessel Maersk Montana, were sent to rescue Baluchi 70 nautical miles east of St. Augustine, the Coast Guard said.

He was exhausted and taken to the Coast Guard air station in Clearwater, where his medical condition was evaluated. There were no reported injuries, the Coast Guard said.

“Part of his effort was to make world peace but he got caught up in the Gulf Stream,” said Coast Guard public affairs specialist Mark Barney. “The chances of muscling out of the Gulf Stream were pretty low.”

Baluchi could not be reached for comment, but a video posted on Baluchi’s Facebook page described his plans to travel in the bubble across the Caribbean, as well as his other athletic exploits.

The CNN.com story quoted Baluchi saying he’d run across the United States twice and around its perimeter once. He fled Iran to escape persecution, he said. Now he is an American citizen.

“Reza doesn’t listen to anyone,” Davis Hyslop, a businessman and one of Baluchi’s supporters, said in the 2012 story. “He has these outsized ambitions that he sets his mind to. He’s a success above and beyond anyone’s expectations. It’s almost biblical. But you gotta be a little crazy to undertake such an endeavor, right?”

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We get mail from some of you. Occasionally someone thinks they are funnier and smarter than Impish or I. This usually involves them trying to make jokes at our expense. A threat or lesson is generally required when this occurs.

The latest one to exhibit this wrong thinking us Paul B. Who sent us this under the Subject line: “NOT SAYING EITHER OF YOU ARE OLD — BUT——-“

 

Video is 15 minutes long so I suggest filling your cup first and getting comfy.

Well as you all know I recently had my 54th Birthday. When 30 rolled around that one stung a little, 35 wasn’t too bad, 40 stung worse, 45 was nothing, 50 was a root canal. I was expecting 54 to be “meh another birthday’ but the realization of how short the time between 53 and 54 seemed and the greater epiphany of how short the time between 50 and 54 seemed sunk in. I realized 55 was likely to hurt as much as a broken arm when it arrives. In short I was feeling my age and didn’t need any reminders of it humorous or other wise so I probably didn’t take the whole thing all that well and failed to find it funny enough to let Paul get away with it Scott free.

The problem arose when the standard threat of a nocturnal visit from the my Ninja cat minions was issued to Paul. He wasn’t having any of it. Impish, his voice aquiver tried to warn Paul. Nope apparently either Paul is slower on the uptake than molasses International Falls in January, this is Paul the crazy cat guy:

Or he fancies himself some sort of Cat Whisperer because he basically invited the Ninja Cat Clan to come visit him.

So with my message either not sinking in (possibly due to senility) or outright ignored the first time around I was forced to find another way to get my message across. Then it hit me, if Paul is such an expert on being old and what its all about I should make use of his knowledge! SO-

WELCOME TO OUR NEW REGULAR FEATURE!

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Impish- looks like you might have someone to share the attention of that Phantom Maniacal Bus Driver with from now on!

Paul- now you know why that laugh was so sadistically evil, TOLD YOU you’d get yours pal!

The rest of you, or at least our loyal donating supporters-  watch for more senile sage words on aging from Paul in future issues!

grumpy life

Anti hyprocracy Curmudgeon

About lethalleprechaun

I believe in being the kind of man who, when my feet touch the floor in the morn', causes the Devil to say "BUGGER ME! HIMSELF IS UP!" ======== I'm a White Married Heterosexual who fervently believes in the war(s) we are fighting, the Second Amendment which I plan on defending with my last breath and my last round of ammunition as well as Arizona's stringent law on Immigration and the need for the border wall. I'm a right of center Con-centrist with Tea Party & Republican sympathies who drives an SUV. I am a Life Time Member of the NRA, a Charter Member of the Patriots' Border Alliance and North American Hunters Association. If there is a season for it and I can shoot one I'll eat it and proudly wear its fur. I believe PETA exists solely to be a forum for Gays, Vegetarians, Hollywood snobbery to stupid to get into politics and Soybean Growers. The ACLU stopped protecting our civil liberties sometime after the 1960s and now serves its own bigoted headline grabbing agenda much in the same way as the Southern Poverty Law Center. I am ecstatic that WE the PEOPLE finally got mad enough to rise up and take back the Government from WE the ENTITLED and reverently wish the Liberals would just get over the loss and quit whining/protesting all the time. After all they're just reaping what they've sown. I am Pro-choice both when it comes to the issue of abortion AND school prayer. I believe in a government for the people, by the people which represents and does the people's will. Therefore I an Pro States rights and mandatory term limits but against special interest group campaign contributions and soft money. I think that sports teams who allow their players to sit or take a knee during the National Anthem should be boycotted until the message is received that this is not acceptable behavior for role models for children. I believe Congressional salaries should be voted on bi-annually by the people they represent and not by themselves. I think Congress should be subject to every law they pass on the populace including any regarding Social Security or Healthcare. Speaking of the Healthcare bill (or con job as I see it) I hope Trump will overturn it and set things back to normal. I oppose the building of an Mosque or ANY Islamic center at or within a 10 mile radius of Ground Zero in New York. I will fight those in favor of this until hell freezes over and then I will continue to fight it hand to hand on the ice. Further I think the ban on immigrants from certain nations known to harbor and promote terrorism is a justified measure, at least until we can come up with better methods of vetting and tracking those non citizens we allow in the country. We did not inflict this measure on them those who refuse to point out, denounce or fight radical religious terrorism brought this upon themselves.
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7 Responses to Leprechaun Laughs # 267 for Wednesday Oct 8th 2014

  1. Ginny says:

    Thank you for the outstanding breakfast buffet that was very kind of both of you. Lethal, your blog for today, will hopefully be remembered and taken to heart by ALL the members. This is a good example of what we all will miss it they shut the door to Dragon Laffs. I guess what I’m saying
    this is our final drive for support from you, who say they just love DL, it’s now or never. Don’t think someone else will send in a donation….we need yours!

    My precious Leprechaun Chef….you make me laugh each time you put up your warnings before actually going in to your recipes. Today, you outdid yourself….DRAGON DROOL….WEAK KNEES ..and WAIST LINE EXPANDING.

    • lethalleprechaun says:

      Better never mention when you make them Ginny, Impish thinks nothing of flying cross country for a ‘snack attack’

  2. Joseph Clements says:

    Please don’t give up. and by the way if 54 hurt, just wait till you see 83

    • lethalleprechaun says:

      Only if I’m rich, have private healthcare and am surrounded by lots of pretty nurses will I ever see 83 Joseph, The V.A. and Obamacare have pretty much seen to that.

  3. maggie culligan says:

    I love Dragon Laffs,, and hope it will be able to stay around for a long, long time. It makes my day and I absolutely agree with what Leathal and Impish say and do

  4. JIM says:

    I need your snail mail to send donation

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