Leprechaun Laughs #223 for Dec 12th 2013


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Recovery continues here at Keebler Towers for both Molly and I at a slow but steady pace. Short bouts of activity interspersed with longer rest periods of just sitting dormant or spent napping are pretty much the order of the day.

The cold wet weather makes the napping and remaining under blankets options so much more attractive and soup and oven based dishes are pretty much the standing order here.

I’m still playing catch up on a lot of fronts after being down for nearly 10 days so this week’s issue again is a hodgepodge assortment of mismatched offerings without any particular rhyme or reason. I hope to be back to 100% and a normal issue next week.

Of course by then I’ll have gotten caught up just in time for Impish to be taking off.

SIGH! Let’s get this show on the road before I suffer a set back shall we?

 

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Coffeecare

What if buying coffee was like buying health insurance?

 

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Received this cautionary holiday tale from reader K-Squared:

With the Holidays upon us I would like to share a personal experience with my friends about drinking and driving.

As you may know some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities from time to time on the way home after a “social session” out with friends. Well, two days ago I was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails followed by some rather nice red wine. Feeling jolly I still had the sense to know that I may be slightly over the limit.

That’s when I did something that I’ve never done before – I took a cab home.

Sure enough on the way home there was a police road block, but since it was a cab they waved it past. I arrived home safely without incident.

This was a real surprise as I had never driven a cab before, I don’t know where I got it and now that it’s in my garage I don’t know what to do with it.

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Received this get well card from Impish….

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I’ve now switched to those hermetically sealed disposable toothbrushes.

Angels We Have Heard on High (Christmas w/ 32 fingers and 8 thumbs) – ThePianoGuys

Those Piano Guys are at it again! Fantastic rendition and highly entertaining!

 

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The Empire State Building

A man gets off the elevator at the bar on top of the Empire State Building. He is bowled over by the splendor and the view. He orders a drink, and then remarks about how there’s a large open window with no guardrails or anything — someone could fall a long way!

“There’s no problem with that, it’s completely safe!” says a man dressed in a sharp suit, glasses and a fedora. “Even if you fell out, the building creates a strong updraft current that will bring you right back to safety!”

“Huh?” the man says, incredulous.

“Sure, let me show you!” the man at the bar says, stepping to the window and allowing himself to fall right out.

“Oh my gosh!” says the newcomer. He bends over to look out the window to see what happened just as the man comes back up in the wind, right into the window, and lands right on his feet! Even his fedora is still firmly in place.

“That’s amazing!” he says. “Does it happen like that all the time?”

“Yep, I’ve done it many times,” says the square-jawed man. He offers to hold the newcomer’s drink while he tries it.

“Here goes nothing,” the newbie says. He leans out the window and falls out of the building — and all the way to the street where he goes Splat! The man in the suit says “tsk tsk tsk” and drinks the man’s cocktail.

“You know,” the bartender finally says to the regular, “you’re really a mean bastard when you’re drunk, Superman.

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Seems like it would be a time saver!

DL -Lethals Library of Links

A dead simple snow forecaster

With the winter weather sweeping across the nation, thoughts of snow angels and snowmen arise. But who wants to sort through weather maps and screens of forecast data?

For a no-fuss snowcast, How Much Will It Snow? has you covered. Enter the name of your city and the site will give you an immediate overview of the inches you can expect.

How Much Will It Snow? also gives the high and low temps for the next few days as well as commute conditions. It even posts National Weather Service advisories to keep you informed of any severe weather alerts.

howmuchwillitsnow.com

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Jogger knocked out by flying deer

A 27-year-old woman was knocked out by a flying deer while jogging in Virginia.

Yes, that’s right.

Krystine Rivera was running by the side of Clairborne Parkway in Ashburn last week when she was hit by an airborne deer, the Washington Post reported.

The deer had been struck by a nearby car.

Rivera told Washington TV station WRC she never saw the deer coming.

“I was running, then I was on the ground and then was listening to the paramedic,” she said. “I’m surprised I made it out alive.”

Both Rivera and the driver were hospitalized, but the deer did not survive.

!cid_B1933253-1631-4982-A7FB-6C52731CD164

THE OBAMACARE HELP PHONE NUMBER

I cannot take credit for the following info. It was provided to me by someone with more imagination to discover these kinds of things than I have.

OK, so we all know ObamaCare is a mess right now, and some feel it always will be.  If you go to the government health care website, check out the phone number to call with questions.

https://www.healthcare.gov/

Kathleen Sebelius gave out the national ‘ObamaCare hotline’ on MSNBC earlier today. The phone number is 1-800-318-2596.

What does this number spell if one looks at the phone number key pad? 1 isn’t assigned a letter, but 3,8,2,5,9 and 6 are. It comes out to 1-800-F-ck-You. SERIOUSLY!, it actually spells:

1-800-3(F) 8(U) 2(C) 5(K) 9(Y) 6(O)

You can’t even make this up if you try.  Please verify it yourself.

My apologies to anyone who is sensitive to language, but this just had to be brought to your attention.

 

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The holiday party season is upon us again and that means we’re all searching for new different and memorable offerings to serve or take to parties.

 

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Sausage Balls

Here in the South we love Biscuits & Sausage Gravy. It’s a no brain sure fire hit when ever you serve it. So why not make it into an appetizer? Serve them with a warm bowl of Cream/Country Gravy for dipping and watch them disappear!

Prep Time: 20 min  | Inactive Prep Time: —
Cook Time: 15 min  | Level: Easy
Serves: 60 servings

Ingredients

1/2 pound bulk pork sausage (Savory or Breakfast)
2 cups shredded sharp Cheddar cheese
1/4 cup milk
11/2 cups buttermilk, pancake and waffle mix
2 tablespoons dry onion soup mix
1/8 to 1/4 teaspoon ground hot red pepper

Directions

Mix together sausage, cheese, milk and egg in a large bowl. Add buttermilk pancake and waffle mix with onion soup mix and ground red pepper. Blend well. Pinch off bits of dough and shape into 1- inch balls. Place on lightly greased baking sheets, spacing 11/2 inches apart, and sprinkle lightly with paprika. Bake 10 to 15 minutes at 375 degrees until deep golden brown, turning the balls over at halftime. Remove from baking sheets and serve.

Want a little variety? Change the sausage out for Italian (sweet Mild or Hot your preference) Swap the Cheddar for an Italian Blend (Asiago & Provolone go well if you can find them shredded or shred them yourself. 20 min to 1/2 an hour in the freezer will make them easier to shred) Use only 1 tablespoon of Onion soup mix and one of Italian seasoning. Accompany with a dipping sauce of warm pizza or marinara sauce.

Though I have yet to have reason to try finding it, I’m fairly certain there should be a workable combination using either Chorizo and Mexican Blend cheese or a Ground Pork and chili/taco seasoning mix to make a Mexican version to be dipped in Salsa.

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Mini Cheese Balls

Prep Time: 4 hr 0 min | Inactive Prep Time: —
Cook Time:  — | Level: Easy
Serves: 24 1-inch balls

 

 

Directions

Mix 8 ounces softened cream cheese with 1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce, 1/2 teaspoon grated lemon zest and 1 cup shredded firm cheese (like cheddar, parmesan, pepper jack or gouda); season with salt and pepper. With moistened hands, form into 1-inch balls, chill 4 hours, then roll in toppings. Pictured here are chopped pistachios, chives, tarragon, hulled pumpkin seeds, bacon with paprika, almonds, and black and white sesame seeds.

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[180 C = 350 F]

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In case you are wondering yes this actually DOES work quite well as long as what ever you were blending wasn’t excessively sticky or thick. I use this to clean up fast in between blender batches and do a more complete disassembled cleaning prior to storing away.

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There is no Parting Shot again this week.

It seems they are counterproductive to getting in the Holiday Spirit.

Instead here is one of the famous Coca-Cola Polar Bear commercials for you to enjoy.

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About lethalleprechaun

I believe in being the kind of man who, when my feet touch the floor in the morn', causes the Devil to say "BUGGER ME! HIMSELF IS UP!" ======== I'm a White Married Heterosexual who fervently believes in the war(s) we are fighting, the Second Amendment which I plan on defending with my last breath and my last round of ammunition as well as Arizona's stringent law on Immigration and the need for the border wall. I'm a right of center Con-centrist with Tea Party & Republican sympathies who drives an SUV. I am a Life Time Member of the NRA, a Charter Member of the Patriots' Border Alliance and North American Hunters Association. If there is a season for it and I can shoot one I'll eat it and proudly wear its fur. I believe PETA exists solely to be a forum for Gays, Vegetarians, Hollywood snobbery to stupid to get into politics and Soybean Growers. The ACLU stopped protecting our civil liberties sometime after the 1960s and now serves its own bigoted headline grabbing agenda much in the same way as the Southern Poverty Law Center. I am ecstatic that WE the PEOPLE finally got mad enough to rise up and take back the Government from WE the ENTITLED and reverently wish the Liberals would just get over the loss and quit whining/protesting all the time. After all they're just reaping what they've sown. I am Pro-choice both when it comes to the issue of abortion AND school prayer. I believe in a government for the people, by the people which represents and does the people's will. Therefore I an Pro States rights and mandatory term limits but against special interest group campaign contributions and soft money. I think that sports teams who allow their players to sit or take a knee during the National Anthem should be boycotted until the message is received that this is not acceptable behavior for role models for children. I believe Congressional salaries should be voted on bi-annually by the people they represent and not by themselves. I think Congress should be subject to every law they pass on the populace including any regarding Social Security or Healthcare. Speaking of the Healthcare bill (or con job as I see it) I hope Trump will overturn it and set things back to normal. I oppose the building of an Mosque or ANY Islamic center at or within a 10 mile radius of Ground Zero in New York. I will fight those in favor of this until hell freezes over and then I will continue to fight it hand to hand on the ice. Further I think the ban on immigrants from certain nations known to harbor and promote terrorism is a justified measure, at least until we can come up with better methods of vetting and tracking those non citizens we allow in the country. We did not inflict this measure on them those who refuse to point out, denounce or fight radical religious terrorism brought this upon themselves.
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2 Responses to Leprechaun Laughs #223 for Dec 12th 2013

  1. lethalleprechaun says:

    I hope so too Pat because this coughing and resulting headache stuff plus the exhaustion it creates is for the birds!

  2. Pat says:

    Hope you and yours are well soon.

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