Good Morning Campers…Well, this morning’s issue is so jammed packed full of stuff that I’m really not sure what to talk about in the opening.
The Impish Dragon with nothing to say… how odd is that. I think we should just get on with it and start with the fun stuff and let’s see if I can’t come up with something to talk about as we go…
Oh my goodness, how true this really is! Shopping on line in real life….
This is awesome. Watch on full screen. Only takes a few seconds.
FULL SCREEN IS BEST
Remember Crockett Keller, that fella from Texas who ran the radio ad about not teaching gun basics to Muslims and Obama supporters? Yeah, I thought you did. Well, here’s an update.
Hello. My name is, ah, Limpish Drag…er…Lizard…Limpish Lizard and I am here today to talk to you about the wunerful recipe I got from Leprechaun Laffs the otter day. It was for some sorta cookies..cupcakes…that’s right, it was for Lasagna Cupcakes. They was easy to make and tasted gooder than my momma makes. And remember, I got the recipe right here, well, not RIGHT here, but here from that other fella…the green guy…Lethal Limerick or … no … Leapin’ Leprechaun … no, that ain’t right neither. Lethal Limberger…no…
Seriously… these were some of the greatest little treats ever made in the Dragon kitchen. We made them in both cupcake tins and in the tiny loaf pans. They were delicious! Got scooped up fast and disappeared from the kitchen faster than most. I am, as has been mentioned by Lethal on Wednesday, a lasagna connoisseur. And I would be proud to put these little devils on my table anytime.
Tonight…well, actually, very early tomorrow morning, but I doubt seriously anyone is going to get up special to do this, so … tonight, before you go to bed, remember to set your clocks back one hour. Yup, you get an extra hour of sleep tonight, to make up for the hour you lost this past spring. Now, don’t you feel better? Officially, at 0200 hrs, local time, on Sunday, November 6, 2011, it becomes 0100 hrs. Unlike the springtime when everyone shows up to work late (when you have to work on Sundays, in the fall, everyone shows up early. As one who is working this weekend, I’m going to do my very best to get it right and get my extra hour of beauty sleep. And those of you who know me, know that I really need all the beauty sleep I can get. lol.
After a visit to a house of prostitution a man notices
green lumps on his willy, so he goes to his doctor’s office.
“This is serious.” says the doctor, examining the man’s willy.
“You know how wrestlers get cauliflower ears ?”
“Yes” says the man, looking horrified.
“Well,” says the doctor, “You’ve got brothel sprouts.”
A couple of articles really caught my attention this week and I revived our WTF? category. Not for the crazy pictures, but just for the plain crazy…
NYC Woman in Medically-Induced Coma After Struck With Falling Shopping Cart
The wealthy Manhattan real-estate agent who was hit by a shopping cart that police say was dropped four stories by two 12-year-olds as she was buying Halloween candy for underprivileged children will “in the best of cases” be in rehabilitation for months, her husband told the New York Post.
The two young suspects were telling jokes and laughing with each other after they were taken into custody, police sources told the newspaper.
“They were just doing it for fun,” one law enforcement source said of the alleged crime.
WTF? They were doing it for fun? For fun! What in the world is happening to our country? Where were these kids parents? I’m shocked beyond words! The article, which you should read by following the link ab0ve, goes on to say that the suspects were charged in Juvenile Court with assault. I’m sorry. Assault in Juvenile Court should be two bigger kids beating up a smaller one for his lunch money. This is attempted murder and should be tried in adult court. It wasn’t a prank gone bad. It wasn’t an accident. And they sure as hell don’t feel bad about it if they were telling jokes and laughing after they were taken into custody!!!!! These are little monsters and should be put away!
And another one was the judge who was video taped back in 2006 I think, beating his 16 year old daughter repeatedly with a belt. I couldn’t watch the whole video. My heart was ripped out of my chest. It’s not discipline when a full grown man uses a full grown man’s strength with a belt on another human being, be they a child (as in this case) or another full grown man. Here’s the link if you’re interested: http://newsone.com/nation/associatedpress3/judge-william-adams-beating-daughter-video/ (if the link gives you an ad first, click in the upper right hand corner to skip it.)
So many possibilities for this column. Just read a story about a pair of 14 year olds who were suspended for hugging in the hallway at school. The Florida school has a strict no-hugging policy because they say they can’t tell the difference between a wanted and unwanted hug. Really? These people are teaching our children and they can’t tell the difference between someone who is receiving a welcoming hug and someone who is fighting off an attacker? Geez!
And finally, did you see the video of the gear up landing in Poland? Okay, no Polish jokes now or I’ll have to take offense…there are several good videos here, at this site. http://www.tvn24.pl/0,1722771,0,1,klopoty-boeinga-nad-okeciem,wiadomosc.html Enjoy!
Socially Unacceptable Humor
I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the
biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on. I said “You’re pulling
I saw a poor old lady fall over oday on the ice!! At least I presume
she was poor – she only had $1.20 in her purse.
My girlfriend thinks that I’m a stalker. Well, she’s not exactly my
Went for my routine checkup today and everything seemed to be going
fine until he stuck his index finger up my butt! Do you think I
should change dentists?
A wife says to her husband you’re always pushing me around and talking
behind my back. He says what do you expect? You’re in a wheel chair.
I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get
reincarnated but must come back as a different creature. She said she
would like to come back as a cow. I said, “You’re obviously not
The wife has been missing a week now. Police said to prepare for the
worst. So, I have been to the thrift shop to get all of her clothes
At the Senior Citizens Center they had a contest the other day. I
lost by one point: The question was: Where do women mostly have
curly hair? Apparently the correct answer was Africa!!!
One of the other questions that I missed was to name one thing
commonly found in cells. It appears that Mexicans is not the correct
There’s a new Muslim clothing shop opened in our shopping center, but
I’ve been banned from it after asking to look at some of the new
A buddy of mine has just told me he’s getting it on with his
girlfriend and her twin. I said “How can you tell them apart?” He
said “Her brother’s got a mustache.”
Just put a deposit down on a brand new Porsche and mentioned it on
Facebook. I said, “I can’t wait for the new 911 to arrive!” Next
thing I know 4,000 f….g Muslims have added me as a friend!!
Being a modest man, when I checked into my hotel on a recent trip, I
said to the lady at the registration desk, “I hope the porn channel in
my room is disabled.” To which she replied, “No, it’s regular
people-porn, you sick bastard.
The Red Cross have just knocked at our door and asked if we could help
towards the floods in Pakistan. I said we would love to, but our
garden hose only reaches the driveway.
Today’s Last Word…
comes to us, from of all places, the Washington Post…
August 18, 2011 Obama: The Affirmative Action President by Matt Patterson (columnist – Washington Post, New York Post, San Francisco Examiner)
Years from now, historians may regard the 2008 election of Barack Obama as an inscrutable and disturbing phenomenon, a baffling breed of mass hysteria akin perhaps to the witch craze of the Middle Ages. How, they will wonder, did a man so devoid of professional accomplishment beguile so many into thinking he could manage the world’s largest economy, direct the world’s most powerful military, execute the world’s most consequential job?
Imagine a future historian examining Obama’s pre-presidential life: ushered into and through the Ivy League despite unremarkable grades and test scores along the way; a cushy non-job as a “community organizer”; a brief career as a state legislator devoid of legislative achievement (and in fact nearly devoid of his attention, so often did he vote “present”) ; and finally an unaccomplished single term in the United States Senate, the entirety of which was devoted to his presidential ambitions. He left no academic legacy in academia, authored no signature legislation as a legislator.
And then there is the matter of his troubling associations: the white-hating, America-loathing preacher who for decades served as Obama’s “spiritual mentor”; a real-life, actual terrorist who served as Obama’s colleague and political sponsor. It is easy to imagine a future historian looking at it all and asking: how on Earth was such a man elected president?
Not content to wait for history, the incomparable Norman Podhoretz addressed the question recently in the Wall Street Journal:
To be sure, no white candidate who had close associations with an outspoken hater of America like Jeremiah Wright and an unrepentant terrorist like Bill Ayers, would have lasted a single day. But because Mr. Obama was black, and therefore entitled in the eyes of liberaldom to have hung out with protesters against various American injustices, even if they were a bit extreme, he was given a pass.
Let that sink in: Obama was given a pass — held to a lower standard — because of the color of his skin. Podhoretz continues:
And in any case, what did such ancient history matter when he was also so articulate and elegant and (as he himself had said) “non-threatening,” all of which gave him a fighting chance to become the first black president and thereby to lay the curse of racism to rest?
Podhoretz puts his finger, I think, on the animating pulse of the Obama phenomenon — affirmative action. Not in the legal sense, of course. But certainly in the motivating sentiment behind all affirmative action laws and regulations, which are designed primarily to make white people, and especially white liberals, feel good about themselves.
Unfortunately, minorities often suffer so that whites can pat themselves on the back. Liberals routinely admit minorities to schools for which they are not qualified, yet take no responsibility for the inevitable poor performance and high drop-out rates which follow. Liberals don’t care if these minority students fail; liberals aren’t around to witness the emotional devastation and deflated self esteem resulting from the racist policy that is affirmative action. Yes, racist.
Holding someone to a separate standard merely because of the color of his skin — that’s affirmative action in a nutshell, and if that isn’t racism, then nothing is. And that is what America did to Obama.
True, Obama himself was never troubled by his lack of achievements, but why would he be? As many have noted, Obama was told he was good enough for Columbia despite undistinguished grades at Occidental; he was told he was good enough for the US Senate despite a mediocre record in Illinois; he was told he was good enough to be president despite no record at all in the Senate. All his life, every step of the way, Obama was told he was good enough for the next step, in spite of ample evidence to the contrary. What could this breed if not the sort of empty narcissism on display every time Obama speaks?
In 2008, many who agreed that he lacked executive qualifications nonetheless raved about Obama’s oratory skills, intellect, and cool character. Those people — conservatives included — ought now to be deeply embarrassed. The man thinks and speaks in the hoariest of clichés, and that’s when he has his teleprompter in front of him; when the prompter is absent he can barely think or speak at all.Not one original idea has ever issued from his mouth — it’s all warmed-over Marxism of the kind that has failed over and over again for 100 years.
And what about his character? Obama is constantly blaming anything and everything else for his troubles. Bush did it; it was bad luck; I inherited this mess. It is embarrassing to see a president so willing to advertise his own powerlessness, so comfortable with his own incompetence. But really, what were we to expect? The man has never been responsible for anything, so how do we expect him to act responsibly?
In short: our president is a small and small-minded man, with neither the temperament nor the intellect to handle his job.When you understand that, and only when you understand that, will the current erosion of liberty and prosperity make sense. It could not have gone otherwise with such a man in the Oval Office.
It does put it in quite the context.