Lethal stands at the podium in a broad brim hat and very dark sunglasses shouting directions to someone off stage.

“Lower… LOWER… I SAID LOWER! Ok help me out here what part of the direction ‘lower’ are you failing to comprehend? Mayhaps a lowering of your salary as an example…”

Suddenly the immediate area of the podium is quite a bit darker in its illumination.

“Ah yes very nice in fact grand that is. I thank you for your kind, if was slightly obtuse help.”

Shuffling his papers he turns his attention to you folks.

“Top o the Morn ta ya and isn’t it a grand morning! The sun is shining, the birds sweetly singing, God is in his Heaven and who bloody well cares where Mother Nature has gone off to to direct he next snit at someone I’m off the hook!

Last Thursday the eggheads and weather weenies over at NASA proudly crowed that the El Nino which was being blamed for the significant rain events effecting the West and South West had blown it self out and was over. Dead. Kaput. Ver Kempt. Fursnooked. A memory.

Yet Friday morning as you all saw from Impish’s opening last Saturday I got hammered again. As I did later in the day Saturday not mention nothing of a substantial portion of Sunday and intermittently Monday. Our power went up and down faster and more often that a Harlem Globetrotter dribbling a basketball.

The NASA Nerds quickly explained long and loudly to anyone who would pause from throwing bad produce at them that they were right and that this moisture was in fact coming not from the West but from the South off the Gulf because of the EL Nino retreating.

Consequently several were tied to a rocket and launched at a weather satellite to motivate the rest of them as well as to show our very wet displeasure. Apparently we were successful in getting our message across because we have no rain in our forecast for the next five days. Partly cloudy to mostly Sunny looms ahead.

Of course this presents a slight challenge as well. Most of us are no longer used to the bright sunshine, hence the wide brim hat and the very dark glasses to avoid searing our retinas. Also those of us of Irish extraction and other extremely faire skinned races are painting our possibly exposed or exposable parts in SPF Dark Side of the Moon sunscreen lest we spontaneously combust.

Even so I’m very happy its stopped raining..at least for now.

Mean time…

Well in my case that’s how you do it pretty much every morning. That center pot better be full though!

 

 

ISIS Hires Disabled Executioner – But Is It Enough To Satisfy Critics Of Its Employment Practices?

Has Islamic State recruited a disabled executioner to boost its ‘equal opportunities credentials’ in Libya?

he Islamic State has employed a wheelchair-bound executioner to terrorize residents in its new stronghold in Libya, a human rights report revealed on Wednesday.

The executioner, who appears in propaganda photos showing the shooting of an alleged spy, may have been chosen by Isis as part of a crude attempt to show it is an “equal opportunities” organization.

An account of how he executed in a man in a public square in the Libyan city of Sirte is given a new report by Human Rights Watch, which says the group has executed up to 49 people since seizing control of Sirte in February 2015.

Here is a photo of Impish trying to hide from Mother Nature by posing as a playground. Not saying of course that he’s not big enough to be a playground.

Mean time here is a picture of me attempting to fight off another attack by Mother Nature.

 

 

A man telephones a law office and says, “I want to speak to my lawyer.”
The receptionist replies, “I’m sorry but he died last week.”
The next day the same man phones again and asks the same question. The receptionist replies, “I told you yesterday, he died last week.”
The next day the man calls again and asks to speak to his lawyer. By this time the receptionist is getting a little annoyed and says, “I keep telling you that your lawyer died last week. Why do you keep calling?”
The man says, “Because I just love hearing it.”

Its been a while since I posted any recipes. Here are a couple that are perfect for those hot summer days soon to be here.

Chicken Enchilada Lasagna

Sits well so you can use the oven while its cooler and serve by heating portions in microwave though its just as good at room temp. Serve with a salad.

 

Prep. time: 20 min

Cook time: 45 min

Serving Information

Serves: 12

 

 

 

 

Ingredients

• 2 jars (15 oz.) Classico® Spicy Tomato & Parmesan Cream Pasta Sauce
• 1 package Soft corn tortillas (approx. 18 tortillas)
• 2 cans (15 oz.) Black beans, drained
• 1 can (15 oz.) Whole kernel corn, drained
• 1 1/2 lb. Chicken breasts, boneless and skinless
• 3 cups Monterey Jack cheese, shredded (reserve some for topping)
• 4 Scallions, chopped (reserve one for garnish)
• 1/2 tsp. Dried oregano
• 1/4 tsp. Chili powder
• 1/4 tsp. Garlic powder
• 1/4 tsp. Onion powder
• 1 1/2 tsp. Ground cumin
• 1/2 tsp. Salt
• 1/2 tsp. Ground black pepper

Instructions

1. Preheat oven to 375°F.
2. Boil chicken breasts in water until fully cooked.
3. While chicken is cooking, mix all dry spices and salt in a medium bowl.
4. When chicken is finished cooking, shred on a cutting board by pulling between two forks.
5. Add shredded chicken, black beans and corn to bowl with seasoning and toss to coat evenly.
6. In a 9×13” baking dish, spread a thin layer of Classico® Spicy Tomato and Parmesan Cream Sauce.
7. Place the soft tortillas oven the sauce to create the first layer of the lasagna.
8. Top with about 1/3 of the chicken, bean & corn mixture. Sprinkle on top 1/3 of the scallions and 1/3 of the cheese.
9. Cover with sauce, add another layer of tortillas and begin layering ingredients again.  
10. Repeat this for one more layer.  You should have three layers ending with sauce on top.
11. Cover dish with foil and bake for 20 minutes.
12. After 20 minutes, remove foil and sprinkle on remainder of cheese and bake for additional 10-15 minutes or until cheese is golden and sauce is bubbly.
13. Top with remaining scallions and serve.

Tips

If you do not like spicy foods, substitute with Classico® Four Cheese Tomato Cream Sauce.
To make vegetarian lasagna, remove chicken and eliminate steps 3 & 4. Mix seasoning from step 3 into sauce.

I use the shredded meat white and dark from a rotisserie chicken when making one of these types of recipes. I find it easier faster and better tasting when you include the dark meat.

Easy Crockpot Baked Ziti

Crockpots are an underused thing in the summer. They don’t heat the house up as much as stovetop cooking and can even easily be moved outside any place you have an outlet.

 

 

Prep time; 20 mins

Cook time: 2 hrs 30 mins

Total time; 2 hrs 50 mins

Yield: 6-8 servings

 

Ingredients

• 2 (25 ounce) jars of pasta sauce
• 15 oz tomato sauce
• 1 pound UNCOOKED penne pasta
• 15 oz ricotta cheese
• 2 eggs
• ⅓ cup freshly chopped basil
• 2 cups of freshly grated parmesan cheese (I bought an 8 oz block and had a little left over)
• 1 cup grated Asiago cheese (or use shredded mozzarella)

Instructions

1. Combine ricotta, eggs, and basil in a bowl and stir well
2. In a large bowl, combine both pasta sauces and tomato sauce together.
3. Grate Parmesan cheese (I used around 2 cups) and set aside.
4. Grease the inside of a 6 qt slow cooker (I used vegan butter spread but you can use whatever you have)
5. Add 2⅓ cups of pasta sauce to the bottom of the slow cooker
6. Add ⅓ of the uncooked penne.
7. Dot on half of the ricotta mixture and spread out evenly.
8. Add half of the Parmesan cheese (1 cup)
9. Add another 2⅓ cups of sauce mixture
10. Add an additional ⅓ of the uncooked penne.
11. Dot on the remaining ricotta and spread out.
12. Sprinkle on the remaining parmesan cheese (1 cup)
13. Add the last ⅓ of the uncooked penne.
14. Top with the remaining 2⅓ cups of sauce mixture
15. Cover and cook on high for 2-3 hours, or until pasta is al dente (we cooked ours for around 2½ hours)
16. During the last few minutes, add asiago cheese (or sub mozzarella) to the top and allow to melt
17. Serve alone or topped with red pepper flakes and served with garlic bread
18. Enjoy!

Notes

*Note – since the noodles use the sauce to cook in, the pasta may become a little dry once reheated. Just added a bit more pasta sauce when reheating!

I like a wetter/saucier pasta. Towards this end I often add a small diced zucchini or 1/2 a pint tray of sliced mushrooms. The moisture given off by the vegetables while cooking is just enough to keep the sauce from becoming too dry.

I’ve also found that how dry the end product will be is influenced by the brand and flavor of the sauce and brand of the pasta. You may have to experiment a little to find your favorite combinations.

Finally, cooking for a bunch of people? Add another crockpot right beside this one with layers of peppers and onions alternating with layers of Italian sausage. (I parboil mine to remove some of the grease first). When the sausages are done and the peppers and onions tender, remove the sausages, cut them in to quarters and add them back to the peppers and onions. Crusty bread a tossed salad and a bottle of good chianti are all you need to feed 10 to 12 adults.

 

 

Father and son team rescues abandoned pets from flood waters

Leah D. and I had a brief exchange in the comments section regarding gold ol’ Texas boys with pick up a can do attitude and a driving need to help others in times of trouble. We proudly call them ‘Bubbas’ and they a re part and parcel to Texas heritage and what makes Texas stand out as well as stand tall. As I promised her, here is another example of Bubba’s lending a hand where needed with being asked to.

Reddit user DUSTYHAM shared these photos of his dad and little brother saving animals from flood waters in Brazoria County, Texas. His dad estimates that they have rescued 40 pets so far. They take them to a temporary shelter set up by the Humane Society.

You are absolutely right Leah Texas does have a lot of people who are ready to come and help out regardless of what the problem is or how far away it might be and we are darn proud to have them too!

 

 

JOAN RIVERS One-Liners

(Growing up I al;ways though she was Don Rickles in drag!)

The Queen of the Barbed One-liners
I’ve had so much plastic surgery, when I die, they will donate my body to Tupperware.

Don’t talk to me about Valentine’s Day. At my age, an affair of the heart is a bypass.

I was the only Jewish kid in a Catholic neighborhood. They all did Hail Marys, I did Hail Murrays.

I have no sex appeal. If my husband didn’t toss and turn, we’d never have had the kid.
On the Vanna White diet, you only eat what you can spell.

People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.

I got a waterbed, but my husband stocked it with trout.
Not all plastic surgeons are good. My cousin went to one and told him she wanted to turn back the hands of time. Now she has a face that could stop a clock.

Want to know why women don’t blink during foreplay? Not enough time.

My vagina is like Newark. Men know it’s there, but they don’t want to visit.

I wish I had a twin so I could know what I’d look like without plastic surgery.

My husband killed himself. And it was my fault. We were making love and I took the bag off my head.

When I was born, my mother asked the doctor, “Will she live?” He said, “Only if you take your foot off her throat.”
My breasts are so low, now I can have a mammogram and a pedicure at the same time.

Don’t tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won’t respect you. For years I used to wake up my daughter and say, “Melissa, you ripped me to shreds. Now go back to sleep.”

I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, “The man goes on top and the woman underneath.” For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds.

I was so ugly that they sent my picture to Ripley’s Believe It or Not and he sent it back and said, “I don’t believe it.”

California is druggy, druggy, druggy. If it is white and it is on the table, they are gonna sniff it. I have a friend who O.D.ed in the beauty shop on dandruff.

The women in California, they get scared. A guy flashes you, they go to the police, “He’s flashing! He’s flashing!” In New York, a guy flashes you, you took your embroidery hoop and played ring toss.

Stevie Wonder, that poor son of a bitch. Who’s going to tell him he’s wearing a macramé plant holder on his head?

Lindsay Lohan said she wouldn’t mind being under oath because she thought Oath was a Norwegian ski instructor.

Elizabeth Taylor is so fat, she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.

If Kate Winslet had dropped a few pounds, the Titanic would never have sunk.

I was so flat, I used to put Xs on my chest and write, “You are here.” I wore angora sweaters just so the guys would have something to pet.

I blame myself for David Gest. It was me who told Liza Minnelli to find herself a man who wouldn’t sleep with other women.

The whole Michael Jackson thing was my fault. I told him to date only 28-year-olds. Who knew he would find 20 of them?

I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it.

And since we’re all adults here, let’s be brutally honest — most babies are not actually attractive. In fact, they’re weird and freakish-looking. A large percentage of them are squinty-eyed and bald and their faces are all mushed together, kind of like Renée Zellweger pushed up against a glass window.

The most beautiful women in the world are always the dumbest. The most beautiful woman in the whole world, Bo Derek … This woman is an idiot. She studies for her Pap test.

I was dating a proctologist with a sense of humor. We’d go out for drinks, he’d go, “Bottoms up.”

I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, “Marry him, you’ll double your wardrobe.”

I was dating a football player. He was so dumb. The man could not count to 21 unless he was naked.

Did you hear Tom Cruise just had a baby? He was there when it was born … He should have been there when it was conceived.

I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.

Last 9/11 search dog gets hero’s salute during last visit to vet

FAIR WARNING GIVEN: You’ll all probably want your box of Kleenex for this next one.

Bretagne (pronounced “Brittany”) was the last living 9/11 search and rescue dog. At almost 17 years old, the former search and rescue dog took her final walk into the veterinarian. During her long life, she assisted 300 other rescue dogs in the rubble of Ground Zero, trudged through the floods of Hurricane Katrina, and embraced thousands of special needs students across elementary schools in Texas. Last year she was flown back to New York for her sweet 16 and treated like royalty, which you can view HERE.

 

Honors provided proudly by the Cy-Fair Texas Fire Department. An amazing life for an amazing dog.

Especially this time of year when that ass is barely clad in what passes for a bikini bottom!

Nope, it’s not his wedding anniversary, it’s his LEPRECHAUN LAFFS ANNIVERSARY!

Since I’m creating this post, not on my normal computer, I can’t really put up fancy graphics, but I didn’t want to let this day go by without congratulating my bestest buddy, my brother, my partner in crime, his greenness, Lethal Leprechaun on 6 years of publishing Leprechaun Laffs.

Congratulations buddy.  You’ve done a great job and you keep getting better with every issue.

There’s plenty of room in the comments section to congratulate Lethal and to wish him many happy issues to come.

Cheers,

Impish Dragon

Good Morning Campers,

Well, it’s been one of those weeks again.  All of us have been to the dentist and all three of us have crappy teeth.  Well yeah.  Add it to the list.

At least we aren’t drowning again like they are in Houston, Lethal’s stomping ground.  I’m on text message with him right now (right now being Friday afternoon) and he says that not only is it flooding there, but the power is out again.

I told him that the only explanation is that he’s pissed off Mother Nature again. 

He’s response really surprised me:

I’ve got a different idea.  She’s mad at you and taking it out on me.

HOW DOES THIS END UP BEING MY FAULT!?!?

I’m not sure yet.  Bet your ass I’m going to figure it out, though. I’ve done and said nothing to her.  Even complemented her on her spring wild flowers.

I’ve had NO interaction with her or any of her minions at all.

You shit in her wild flower fields again?

No

Are you sure?  No Mother Nature Mother-in-Law comparisons?

Nope

OHH!  NOW I UNDERSTAND! It IS all your fault!  I know what she’s pissed about.  She was not wished Happy Mother’s Day OR Happy Earth Day!  Earth Day is always a Saturday and Mother’s Day was your responsibility.  Hence it’s your fault she’s mad and passing it on to me.

Hold on, I’m checking my records.  I’m SURE I sent her a card.

I’m blaming you because you’re always late to the deadline and we don’t have time to double check or edit, just rush to the presses.

Terrance said he mailed out all the Mother’s Day Cards!

… Wait!…What!  No postage!  Are you friggin’ kidding me?!

I’ve got to go.  I’ve gotta go find some place that’s lightning proof!  As soon as she realizes where I am, I’m screwed! 

Campers, I’m sorry.  I gotta go.  You guys go ahead and get started and I’ll catch up later.

The Oliver and Eggleston Funeral Home of Farmville, Virginia, began offering drive-through casket viewing for mourners of the deceased. It’s a perfect idea for today’s America. You drive up to the first window, view the body, then you drive up to the second window, pick up your fries and leave.

Phil Mickelson apologized for his million dollar fine by the Securities and Exchange Commission for insider trading and vowed to be more careful who he hangs out with. It’s tough. Four white guys can’t tee off together at a private golf club without the Obama Justice Department smelling a rat.

Another Spangler and another one of my favorites.

I get truly annoyed when someone tries to make me feel bad about something that I can’t possibly have anything to do with.  I’m sorry, but I don’t feel sorry for any people that were slaves.  The operative word being WERE.  It was a horrible practice that almost EVERY race partook in.  Yes, there were even free black Americans who, prior to the Civil War, owned other blacks as slaves.  I never owned slaves, so why are so many people trying to make me feel guilty for being a white male?

Well, part of the problem is that our “First Family” continue to foster racism in a country that was well on their way to ridding ourselves of that nasty thought process.  And I don’t know about you, but I’m sick and damn tired of it.

What possible reason, other than her wanting to continue the racist program that we’ve tried to rid ourselves of for so long, could she possibly have for bringing such bullshit up at a graduation ceremony?  I’m sick of it.  These people are not MY first family.  Their morals and their politics are shameful and I will not claim them as my own.

I Think My Dog’s a Democrat by Bryan Lewis

Okay, so I get it.  That last cartoon was just plain silly.  But what do you expect from zombie humor?

So, I’m beginning to think that my Dragon Pix and my Fantasy Pix aren’t really going over like they used to.
No, I’m not going to stop them, I am just making an observation.
LOL!
So, yes, I’m just being silly… then tell me what you think?

Ginny, at our last Halloween Party.

This next cartoon, really a political cartoon, almost made me cry in its truthfulness.  This is a problem we ALL need to work on.

Please, don’t let it be that way for you.  Lethal and I will do our very best to remind everyone of just how important our veterans are, but we can’t do it alone.  We need your help too.

Okay this is too cute not to share:

 

DONALD AND HILLARY GO FISHING

 

How do you settle a presidential election when the vote is too close to call?

 

With an ice fishing contest, of course!

 

After the votes were counted, Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump were deadlocked.

 

Instead of going through a recount, the two agreed to a week-long ice fishing contest to settle the election.

 

Whoever caught the most fish at the end of the week would be the President.

 

The candidates decided a remote frozen lake in northern Wisconsin would be the ideal place.

 

No observers were allowed on the fishing rounds, but both candidates would need to have their catches verified and counted each night at 5 PM.

 

After Day 1, Trump returned with a total of 10 fish, Hillary came back with nothing.

 

Day 2 finished, and Trump caught another 20 fish, but Hillary once again came back with nothing!

 

That night, Hillary and her cronies got together and accused Trump of being a “low-life cheater.”

 

Instead of fishing on Day 3, they were just going to follow Trump to spy on him and figure out how he was cheating.

 

Day 3 finished up and Trump had an incredible day, adding 50 fish to his total!

 

That night, Hillary and her democratic buddies got together for the full report on how Donald was cheating.

 

Hillary stood up to give her report and said, “You are not going to believe this, he’s cutting holes in the ice!”

 

And that, my friends, tells you all you need to know.

You guys have read stuff from my buddy Wheats before.  Well, here he is again with another great essay:

 

Well said!  Bravo!

Good Morning.

I find myself in not much of a talkative mood at present so I’ll be brief.

Several kind souls have inquired as to how I am making out with all the rainfall in the last week. For those who don’t know it its been raining heavily for 7 or the last 10 days with Monday being our first day without any rain.

Those torrential rains led to flooding last week that killed at least 16 people last time I looked however I believe that figure may have risen to as high as 20 now. Thankfully we have not had an serious internal flooding with any of this though we suspect we’ve come close a few times.

The opening banner photo is of the area in front of Keebler Towers which is now apparently home to a rabidly hunger pack of Koi. Also I swear I looked out the other night and saw Charon the Ferryman poling his boatload of newly dead souls the length of our parking lot headed to the afterlife.

<= This second photo is of the upper reaches of Keebler Towers showing just how bad the moss & mold invasion has become due to the rains.

As if that isn’t enough the high humidity form the rains is teaming up with the unseasonable warm temperatures to make things terribly oppressive. With the possibility of more rain in the forecast starting seriously again on Thursday things are likely only to get stickier and more mossy/mold.

Now if you’ll excuse me I have to go Tilex my entire Keebler Towers Penthouse before everything resembles green shag carpeting.

Sounds like they’re from the SE Gulf Coast of Texas!

Once you get married the only thing that changes is you because she thinks she has a remote for that too.

This Bed Could Save Your Life in an Earthquake

 

 

Johnny Paycheck – “Take This Job And Shove It”

 

A husband and wife are in bed when there is a knock at the door. The husband rolls over and looks at his clock – it’s 3:30 a.m. He drags himself out of bed and goes downstairs.

When he opens the door, there is a drunk slumped there. “Hi ya,” slurs the stranger. “Can you give me a push?”

“Get lost,” says the man. “It’s half-past three.”

He slams the door and goes back up to bed. He tells his wife about the drunk.

She says, “Dave, that wasn’t very nice of you. Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain and you had to knock on that man’s door? What would’ve happened if he’d told us to get lost?

Shamefaced, the husband gets fully dressed, puts on his shoes and picks up all his tools then goes to his own car and takes out some cables.

Finally having all he needs to assist any problem the man may have, he opens the door and calls out, “Hey, do you still want a push?” 

A voice answers, “Yes, please.”

“Where are you?” calls the man.

“I’m over here…” replies the stranger,

“…on your swing set.”

 

Otis Redding – (Sittin’ On) The Dock Of The Bay (Official Video)

 

Acapella-The millennials song parody

 

Bill Withers – Ain’t No Sunshine

 

June 8: Upsy Daisy Day

Upsy Daisy Day encourages waking up “gloriously, gratefully and gleefully” full of positivity and, if you want, daisies in your hair.

 

“Upsee-dahzee, upsee-mahzee, upsy-daisy!” – Yogurt in Spaceballs

June 12: National Eat Jerky Day

National Eat Jerky Day was created to celebrate the rich history, immense popularity and nutritional benefits of dried meat snacks.

 

 

 

June 18: World Juggling Day

*Clowns not required. In fact keep them away at all costs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

June 19: World Sauntering Day

A day set aside where you’re supposed to slow down and appreciate the world around you.

 

 

June 21: Go Skateboarding Day

This holiday was conceived in 2004 by the International Association of Skateboard Companies (IASC) to help make skateboarding more accessible to the world through various events held in major cities around the world.

Believe it or not there are still more of these but I’ve reached my limit for one week. Don’t worry there is a distinct possibility you’ll see the rest of them at a future date.

 

With all the flooding, wash outs and the undermining of roads, Municipalities here have been hard pushed to come up with enough warning signs. Especially so since one of the biggest threats here in Houston come from fellow motorists whom seem to shut their brains off when the start their car. Here is a favorite of mine posted by some well intentioned individual that is posted in a particularly bad/dangerous area:

Good Morning Campers,

Well, it’s Friday night and because of my short turnaround time for this issue, I’m late in finishing it up.  (I know Lethal, I can hear you now: “So what’s so unusual about that?  The Dwarves down in the press room tell me that you are ALWAYS late in ‘finishing up’.  I’m pretty sure that you’re just out drinking beer and chasing virgins.  Or you’re down in the screening room eating Cheetos and watching porn.  It’s always the same with you, you never…” Okay, so that was a bit much in the channeling Lethal area.  I’m pretty sure I need to go decompress right now.  Get him out of my head.
Impish begins to walk off the stage when he turns back and faces you, “Oh yeah, you guys should go ahead and start on the issue.”
He turns and begins walking but you can still hear him mutter, “I wonder if there’s any Cheetos in the kitchen.”

Well….before we start laughing, let’s get pissed off.

FREE HOUSING FOR ILLEGALS BUT NOT FOR OUR SOLDIERS?
So, let’s just make sure we understand what’s going on here.  The president can demand that taxpayers fund the health care and housing cost of millions of illegal immigrants. BUT – the Senate wants us to make it more difficult for our soldiers to receive their basic stipend for housing?
UNBELIEVABLE!
The Daily Caller reports – The Senate’s draft of the annual defense authorization bill would dramatically change the Basic Allowance for Housing system (BAH) potentially costing service members thousands of dollars a year.
Soldiers are given a stipend at a fixed rate based on their zip code, rank and family status under the current policy.  The National Defense Authorization Acto of 2017 (NDAA) proposes the stipend shift toward a model more similar to its Overseas Housing Allowance – reimbursing troops for actual expenses instead of a fixed amount, the Military Times first reported.
Flexibility in the funds would be eliminated as only utilities and rent would be covered – troops would also be required to provide proof of what they spend.

With the BAH at a fixed rate, a low ranking couple probably has very inexpensive housing and use the little bit of extra BAH to help make ends meet in other areas.  By taking that away, they are basically cutting the wages of the military members and effecting the lower ranking ones, you know, the ones who need it the most, more than they may be able to bear. 

And yet we’ll throw thousands of dollars a month at illegal immigrants who don’t even have to work for it, much less put their lives on the line, like the military members have the potential to do.

It’s just not right!

Okay, now I really do need to laugh.

 

With the on-set of deer hunting season…..a good question!

 

Looking forward to hunting season but I do have a question.  If I shoot a buck, but I only have a doe tag, can I claim that the buck wasn’t really a buck?

 

I mean … maybe he’d always wanted to be a doe, but with no choice of his own he was born with the physical attributes of a male.  And yet … on the inside he’d always known he was truly a female.

 

I’m just wondering if the game warden will buy it,……..  because society and the Supreme Court are stupid enough to do so! 

Sounds okay to me.  That’s the precedent that’s being set, right?

One of my favorite artists of all time, known as the Spangler dragons, named after the artist who created them.  There’s a lot of pictures of Spangler dragons and they’re all lots of fun.

Mostly we’ve been transformed.  From a bookworm to an ebook butterfly.

‘Father,’ he confessed, ‘it has been one month since my last confession.
I had sex with Nookie Green twice last month.’

The priest told the sinner, ‘You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary’s.’

Soon thereafter, another Irish man entered the confessional.
‘Father, it has been two months since my last confession.
I’ve had sex with Nookie Green twice a week for the past two months.’

This time, the priest questioned, ‘Who is this Nookie Green?’

‘A new woman in the neighborhood,’ the sinner replied.

‘Very well,’ sighed the priest. Go and say ten Hail Mary’s.’

At mass the next morning, as the priest prepared to deliver the sermon, a tall, voluptuous, drop-dead gorgeous redheaded woman entered the sanctuary. The eyes of every man in the church fell upon her as she slowly sashayed up the aisle and sat down right in front of the priest. Her dress was green and very short, and she wore matching, shiny emerald-green shoes.

The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart, but just enough to reveal that she wasn’t wearing any underwear.

The priest turned to the altar boy and whispered… ‘Is that Nookie Green?’

The bug-eyed altar boy couldn’t believe his ears but managed to calmly reply…

‘No Father, I think it’s just a reflection from her shoes’!

 

Okay, so there isn’t a great deal of “Fantasy” about the picture, but it sure is cool looking.

It was my first time visiting Dr. Putz for a colonoscopy. I went into his office for my very first rectal exam. His new blond nurse, Ethel, took me to an examining room. She told me to get undressed and have a seat until the doctor could see me. She said that he would only be a few minutes. After putting on the gown that she gave me I sat down. While waiting I observed there were three items on a stand next to the exam table: A Tube of K-Y jelly, A rubber glove And a beer.     When Dr. Putz finally came in I said, “Look Doc, I’m a little confused. This is my first exam. I know what the K-Y is for, and I know what the glove is for, but can you tell me what the BEER is for?” At that, Doctor Putz became noticeably outraged and stormed over to the door. He flung the door open and yelled to his new blonde nurse:   “Damn it, Ethel! I said a BUTT light.“

Okay, I am really behind in getting this issue out, but I have to stop right here because I am so utterly and unbelievably PISSED OFF!!!!!  I can’t believe how insanely angry I am.  This is so over the top for the liberals that it even amazes me that they can argue this point with a straight face.  I had to check to make sure that I wasn’t on one of those fake/humor websites, like the Onion, thinking that this HAS to be a joke.  But no.  It was sent to me by one of the news sources that I trust explicitly.  And they were referencing an article published by the Daily Caller.

So, I know by this time that you are really wondering just what the heck I’m talking about.  Well, I’m not going to reproduce the article here, otherwise I will be spending the next six hours inserting my comments into every other sentence.  I’d have to.  I would be completely unable to NOT rant about each statement.

So, instead, I will copy the headline and a link to the article and I’ll let you people make your own mind up.

Read more: http://dailycaller.com/2016/06/01/washington-state-to-teach-transgenderism-to-kindergartners/#ixzz4AYWIGAs6
Okay, there’s the title and the link, like I said, it was from The Daily Caller.  A news source that I trust, but acknowledge there right leaning opinions. I’m very interested in your opinion about this article.  You can put them in the comments, or if that’s not the way you roll, then you can email me at impishdragon@gmail.com.

Yup, this is the perfect spot for this:

This wild (and wildly expensive) home (They actually have the nerve to call it a bungalow) has an even wilder swimming pool. 

I know that Memorial Day is gone, but it’s not too late for a Memorial Day funny by Jimmy Fallon.

Okay, remember the Chewbacca Mom from last week?  Well, here’s an update: