Lethal sits shaded beneath a palm tree under a large plantation owners style hat eyes closed in what can only be described from the look on his face as  melancholy reverie. A closer looks reveals both his ears sporting noise canceling ear buds and an ancient iPod in his tasteful Hawaiian Shirt pocket. Looking about furtively and failing to notice the flashing light on the camera he produces a large handkerchief, dabs at the tears in his eye before blowing his nose. As the handkerchief lowers he suddenly spots the camera’s blinking red light. Sighing, he returns it to his pocket, pauses the iPod, and pulls an ear bud from one of his ears.

I see you caught me in me mourning the passing of yet another o’ the great ones. Seems lately all I’m doing is announcing for whom the bell has tolled. Sorry I was nae waitin’ on ye but I’ve been sittin’ here doing my own private version of a proper New Orleans funeral as best I’m able to honor the passin’ o a great talent I’ve had the pleasure of seeing live more than a couple o’ times in my life..

Lethal seems as though he might be on the verge of actually breaking down.

You’ll read about it shortly I’m sure. Mean time (sniff) let’s be gittin ta the issue shall we? Off with ya then ‘tis later I’ll be joining you after I’m proper company again and the heat index isn’t literally lethal (above 110 degrees heat index).

Oh, one last wee thing. If the issue looks off at all today or isn’t me best layout work I apologize. My Logitech M570 wireless trackball apparently suffered a near  catastrophic failure of the left click button. Certain things I can do with it but most of the layout work is impossible with it in its current condition. This is the second one to fail me in 3 years. As a result I’m stuck largely relying on the touch pad on the lap top which I hate and make a point of never using for anything serious.

Now if you’d be so kind as to excuse me I’ve the memory of a musical legend to finish paying me respects to.

Just before the camera fades out you see Lethal put the ear bud back in, press PLAY on the iPod and resume sitting with eye closed looking very sad.

 

 

I’m down with that. Ladies, sign up for your preferred mornings in the comments section!

Mos Eisley Kazoo Orchestra takes on the Star Wars Theme

 

Yeah it’s probably a wee late for buying this, but the more Trump runs his ego, the more Republicans self destruct to get at him for refusing to play their game and the looming specter of at least 4 more years of Democratic debauchery and criminal Clinton mayhem in the Whitehouse have me hurriedly reaching for may wallet and fervently wishing for a third alternative.

This kind of crap by a rabid liberal cartoonist who has never met a conservative that he had anything positive to say about just goes to show how desperate the Dems are and how low they will sink in a Presidential election. More on this thought later

A Harley biker is riding by the zoo in Washington, DC when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion’s cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the collar of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents.

The biker jumps off his Harley, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch.
Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly. A reporter has watched the whole event.

The reporter addressing the Harley rider says, ‘Sir, this was the most gallant and brave thing I’ve seen a man do in my whole life.’

The Harley rider replies, ‘Why, it was nothing, really, the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger and acted as I felt right.’

The reporter says, ‘Well, I’ll make sure this won’t go unnoticed. I’m a journalist, you know, and tomorrow’s paper will have this story on the front page… So, what do you do for a living and what political affiliation do you have?’

The biker replies, I’m a U.S. Marine and a Republican.

The journalist leaves.

The following morning the biker buys the paper to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on the front page:

U.S. MARINE ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH

…and THAT, my friends, pretty well sums up the media’s approach to the news these days…

Pete Fountain, a Clarinetist Known for His High-Spirited New Orleans Jazz, Is Dead at 86

Pete Fountain, virtuoso Dixieland jazz clarinetist, who brought the traditional jazz of his native New Orleans to a national audience through frequent appearances on the Lawrence Welk and Johnny Carson television shows, died Saturday, August 6, 2016, of heart failure, according to multiple news sources, he was 86.

He had been in hospice care, his son-in-law and manager, Benny Harrell, told The Associated Press.

Known almost as much for his wit and easy-going personality as his smooth tone and hot licks when playing the clarinet, Fountain embodied the swinging good-time image of his native New Orleans. He entertained generations of jazz fans both in person and on his many television appearances.

Mr. Fountain was a mainstay of the New Orleans music scene for more than six decades, a familiar sight at Mardi Gras and the annual Jazz and Heritage Festival. And the appeal of his high-spirited brand of Dixieland stretched far beyond New Orleans, especially after he began appearing on “The Lawrence Welk Show” in 1957.

In 1957 Fountain was hired by Lawrence Welk as a featured soloist on “The Lawrence Welk Show.” This exposed him to a national audience, and he was well received, but as Fountain wrote later in his autobiography, “A Closer Walk with Pete Fountain,” “Champagne and bourbon don’t mix well.” Welk was upset by Fountain jazzing up his rendition of “Silver Bells” during a Christmas show, and the clarinetist left the show in 1959. In later years he was also a frequent guest on Mr. Carson’s “Tonight Show.

Fountain returned to New Orleans and with additional notoriety opened his own club in the French Quarter. He also played with The Dukes of Dixieland for a time. He recorded a single, “Just a Closer Walk with Thee,” which charted on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1960 and became his signature tune. It later inspired the title of his autobiography.

Peter Dewey Fountain Jr. was born in New Orleans on July 3, 1930, and was exposed from an early age to the lively small-group jazz that was an integral part of that city’s atmosphere. Inspired by Benny Goodman and the New Orleans clarinetist Irving Fazola — and by a family doctor who recommended that he learn a wind instrument to strengthen his weak lungs — he began playing clarinet at age 12. Before he was out of his teens, he had become a familiar presence in the nightclubs on Bourbon Street, often in bands alongside trumpeter Al Hirt. In a 1979 television interview the two recalled working as exterminators to make ends meet during those early years.

He was also a founding member of the Half-Fast Walking Club, one of the Mardi Gras marching Krewes which help to organize and support carnival activities in the city.

As well as being a local fixture in New Orleans, he kept his national profile high by appearing on “The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson” 58 times over the years.

Fountain is survived by his wife, Beverly, three children, six grandchildren and five great grandchildren.

Pete Fountain – Closer Walk With Thee/Amazing Grace

 

You know, it seems to me like three year olds and dragons use the exact same decision making tree as cats. Just saying…

Molly experiences this every time she drags a textbook out to study although our cats are high tech, they see tablets and Kindles as books as well and therefore in much need of rubbing on.

 

 

Best Shifter Ever!

That’s ‘Smiley’. He’s my Legal Council of Record here in Leprechonia.

Pete Fountain – Basin Street Blues

 

We have a T-shirt/Beach Apparel shop up and running now too. Pictured here is one of my suggestions for T-shirts which I’m happy to say we can’t keep on the shelves. No Impish, it doesn’t come in ‘Big Top Tent’ size.

OK somebody get Ginny mummified in that bubble wrap right quick please, but make sure she at least has use of her mouse hand. Good, now carefully lower her prone on that futon mat on the floor, that’s it. Now lets block her so her can’t roll off it with those body pillows. Excellent! Looks like we might be ready to proceed. Whoops! Nope. Need the disclaimer first before getting down to it.

Those of you with bad hearts, diabetes, weak knees, no will power or on restricted/reduced caloric intake diets will may want to scroll past this next part.

DL/LL Digital Media, Lethal Leprechaun and Impish Dragon categorically refuse to accept any responsibility for the consequences of your actions for failing to heed the above warning. Black Lives Matter circular bullshit type logic don’t play here. ALL LIVES MATTER and everyone (of legal age) assumes responsibility for their own actions here.

 

Peach Streusel Slab Pie

There are two great things about this summer slab pie: It serves a big crowd and you don’t have to roll out the dough.

Total Time: 1 hr 25 min
Prep: 25 min
Cook: 1 hr
Yield: 15 servings
Level: Easy

Ingredients

Dough:
2 sticks (1 cup) unsalted butter, at room temperature and cut into small pieces, plus more for greasing the baking sheet
3 cups all-purpose flour
2/3 cup confectioners’ sugar
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt

Filling:
3 pounds peaches (about 6 peaches), cut into 1/2-inch wedges
1 1/2 cups firmly packed light brown sugar
Juice of 1 lemon
3 tablespoons cornstarch
2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1/4 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg

Streusel:
3/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup sliced skin-on almonds
1/2 cup firmly packed light brown sugar
6 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
1/4 teaspoon kosher salt

Directions

 Special equipment: a rimmed 10-by-15-inch baking sheet

Adjust a rack to the bottom third of the oven and preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.

Grease the bottom and sides of a rimmed 10-by-15-inch baking sheet with butter.

For the dough: Combine the butter, flour, confectioners’ sugar and salt in a food processor and process until the mixture comes together in a solid mass (this may take a few minutes). Drop pieces of the dough all over the prepared baking sheet. Use your fingers to press the dough evenly along the bottom and about 1/2 inch up the sides of the pan, filling any gaps. Set aside.

For the filling: Toss together the peaches, brown sugar, lemon juice, cornstarch, vanilla, cinnamon, salt and nutmeg in a large bowl until the cornstarch dissolves. Transfer the filling onto the crust and spread in an even layer. Bake for 30 minutes.

For the streusel: While the pie bakes, make the streusel topping by combining the flour, almonds, brown sugar, melted butter and salt in a small bowl until evenly moistened.

Remove the pie from the oven and sprinkle the streusel evenly over the filling. Return the pie to the oven and bake until the topping is golden brown and the filling is bubbly, 25 to 30 minutes more. (If the crust browns too quickly during baking, cover the pie loosely with foil.)

Let the pie cool. Serve warm or at room temperature.

Mocha Chocolate Icebox Cake

Total Time: 8 hr 25 min
Prep: 25 min
Inactive: 8 hr
Yield: 8 servings
Level: Easy

 

Ingredients

2 cups cold heavy cream
12 ounces Italian mascarpone cheese
1/2 cup sugar
1/4 cup Kahlua liqueur
2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
1 teaspoon instant espresso powder
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
3 8 -ounce packages Bake Shop style chocolate chip cookies
Shaved semisweet chocolate, for garnish

 

Directions

In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, combine the heavy cream, mascarpone, sugar, Kahlua, cocoa powder, espresso powder and vanilla. Mix on low speed to combine and then slowly raise the speed until it forms firm peaks.

To assemble the cake, arrange chocolate chip cookies flat in an 8-inch springform pan, covering the bottom as much as possible. (I break some cookies to fill in the spaces.)

Spread a fifth of the mocha whipped cream evenly over the cookies. Place another layer of cookies on top, lying flat and touching, followed by another fifth of the cream. Continue layering cookies and cream until there are five layers of each, ending with a layer of cream.

Smooth the top, cover with plastic wrap, and refrigerate overnight.

Run a small sharp knife around the outside of the cake and remove the sides of the pan.

Sprinkle the top with the chocolate, cut in wedges and serve cold

 OK let’s have a Ginny check please? Moaning and thrashing about? Ok we’ve got one left to go time to deploy the duct tape. Tape that bubble wrap cocoon down tight so she can’t possibly hurt herself.

Deep breaths now Ginny and try to remain calm, this next one is the tough one because its five variations of a classic recipe in one..

5 Unique S’more Ideas

Caramel Nut S’mores
Extra creamy thanks to the caramel and extra crunchy thanks to the nuts – you’ll definitely be going back for seconds. These s’mores each include two pecan halves, one soft caramel, a square of dark chocolate and a toasted marshmallow sandwiched between two graham crackers. You’ll get the best flavor if you toast the pecans first. Simply heat them in a dry skillet over medium heat, stirring frequently, for 5 minutes or until they’re fragrant and start to brown. Then assemble your s’mores, wrapping each one in aluminum foil and heating on the grill for 3-5 minutes or until the marshmallow and caramel are melted to perfection.

PB&J S’mores
Lunchbox meets campfire in this ultimate comfort food s’more. A PB&J s’more uses a chocolate peanut butter cup in place of traditional milk chocolate for added sweetness and peanut buttery goodness. A few slices of strawberry offer jam-like flavor. These s’mores are actually best made on the grill because it gives the strawberry slices time to soften and melts the peanut butter cup. Simply assemble your s’mores using two graham crackers, one marshmallow, one to two strawberry slices and one peanut butter cup for each. Wrap them individually in aluminum foil and grill for 2-3 minutes or until they’re melted.

Tropical S’mores
Give your s’mores a Tahitian twist with tropical fruit and just a hint of spice. These tropical s’mores feature grilled pineapple dusted with cinnamon, white chocolate and a marshmallow sandwiched between two graham crackers. Start by slicing your cored and skinned pineapple into ½” slices and sprinkle cinnamon over each slice. Grill for 1-2 minutes on each side or until grill marks appear. Chop the slices into 2″ pieces, toast your marshmallow and assemble the rest of your s’more. Close your eyes, picture yourself by the ocean and enjoy!

Lavender S’mores
Want a gourmet twist on the classic s’more? Look no further – a lavender s’more is sure to impress even the most distinguished foodie. Start by preparing your lavender-infused marshmallow: simply heat a cup of mini-marshmallows in the microwave for 10 seconds until they begin to puff, then fold in 2 tablespoons of corn syrup and 2 tablespoons of dried lavender. Assemble your s’more by placing a square of white chocolate on a warmed sugar cookie. Add a dollop of lavender-infused marshmallow and a sprinkle of lavender, then top your s’more with a second cookie. Sweet, satisfying and sophisticated.

I like going over the top by using chopped macadamia nut sugar cookies.

Funky Monkey S’mores
Toasty marshmallow, creamy banana and extra cocoa flavor? Yes, please! The funky monkey s’more uses dark chocolate and chocolate graham crackers for an extra cocoa fix, and it gets an added burst of sweetness from creamy caramelized banana. Start by chopping your banana into ½” slices, then grill the slices on a grilling pan for 1-2 minutes or until they’re just tender. Toast your marshmallow and assemble your s’mores, layering dark chocolate, banana and your marshmallow between two chocolate graham crackers. You can also make these s’mores on the grill, individually wrapped in aluminum foil, to give the banana a little extra time to cook. Your kids will go bananas, and you’ll be jonesing for an extra s’more, too

Grilling bananas is WAY easier if you thread them on 2 round or 1 flat skewer side ways. Cut slices on a bias to make this easier and cover the entire chocolate graham cracker with grilled banana goodness.

Well how did Ginny fare over this last one? Ginny? Gin? What’s that wet spot  under her cheek that’s spreading? Get the laptop away from it! CLEAN UP ASILE GINNY! Drool puddle. Better put the pillow in a plastic bag and a hand towel over that before you slide it under her head. We’ll just let her sleep her dessert coma off.

Pete Fountain – When The Saints Go Marching In

 

 

Please note: The highlighting italics, bold print, underlining emphasis and/or colored font are my way of calling attention to key ideas in the article below and not the work of the author.

My sole editorial comment is show inside of bars “[ ]” in green with my initials after it.

Norm Pattis: Parents undone by grief aren’t public policy spokesmen — they are political pawns

The decision to have Khizr Khan address the Democrats’ national convention at the coronation of Hillary Clinton was a stroke of genius. Who better to take aim at Donald Trump on the topic of Muslim immigration?

Humayun Khan, Mr. Khan’s son, was a captain in the United States Army. He stepped in front of a suicide bomber in Iraq in 2004, sacrificing his own life to save the lives of those he commanded. For this he was awarded a Purple Heart and a Bronze Star — high honors for bravery in the United States military.

The Khan family are also Muslim.

So Mr. Khan was contacted, vetted, and prepared to take the stage at the Democratic convention. His sole qualifying characteristics were his religion, the valor of his son, and his willingness to follow the recommendations of his handlers about how to address Donald Trump, the Republican nominee for president.

Khan hit a homerun.

He denounced Trump, even removing from his jacket pocket a copy of the United States Constitution, struggling in an endearing sort of way to pronounce “United” without the addition of an extra syllable. Had Trump ever read the Constitution? Khan — or the person who wrote his remarks — told the world he doubted Trump had.

Trump, Khan told the world, sacrificed nothing. Mr. Khan and his wife, by contrast, lost a much-loved son.

It was perfect, absolutely perfect: A Muslim hero losing his life to a suicide bomber. The war on terror has nothing to do with Islam, Mr. Trump. See! My son’s blood is as red as yours.

Who would dare criticize Mr. Khan, draped, as he was, in the loss of his son?

Trump, of course.

First, the Republican took a swipe at the Khan couple. Mrs. Khan stood silently by, unable, or afraid, to speak — no doubt silenced by a religion that makes women into second-class citizens, Trump insinuated.

Outrageous, the critics contended. Mrs. Khan then explained, in a published op-ed piece, she was afraid to speak — she could not speak — because speaking of her son moves her to tears. Another perfect moment for the Democrats.

In the days that followed, Mr. Khan became a folk hero, making the rounds of the national television shows. Visitors even flocked to Arlington National Cemetery to pay homage to Humayun.

Then came critics who contended that Trump had disrespected veterans. Families who lose a child on active duty are Gold Star parents. They get special recognition for their loss. They have made the “ultimate sacrifice” and are entitled to deference.

They are entitled to deference. Losing a child in active military duty is an unbearable loss.

But when a Gold Star family member accepts the invitation of a political party to take to the pulpit and take aim at the opposing party’s nominee for president, the family member sheds that deference. Mr. Khan is no victim, however insensitive, even stupid, some of Trump’s remarks in response may have been.

Mr. Khan let himself be used by the Democrats; if some Republicans now misuse him, he doesn’t get to crawl beneath a Gold Star shell and claim it’s all unfair.

Just why both parties thought the national debate about public policy was served by parading the parents of dead children across their respective stages is beyond me. It represents some deep, Oprah-like stain, the dumbing down of debate in the name of raw feeling. [Actually it’s not beyond me it’s politics and campaign strategy at its disgustingly absolute worst and mud slinging lowest.- L.L]

The Republicans called to their convention the mothers of folks killed in the violence in Benghazi and by illegal immigrants. The Democrats countered by calling the mothers of black men killed by police.

Shame on both parties.

Parents undone by grief aren’t public policy spokesmen. They are political pawns. Playing with this passionate fire is the same sort of mistake the courts make when they ask victims to comment on what justice requires in a criminal case.

“No one can be a judge in their own case,” an ancient legal maxim has it.

Amen. Asking those unstrung by grief to see clearly is asking too much.

I don’t know whether Khzir Khan himself has ever read the United States Constitution, although I suspect he’s read at least some portions of it. He is, after all, a graduate of the Harvard Law School. As a lawyer, he surely knows almost every clause of the document is contested terrain in the ideological warfare that moves the courts.

The Constitution is not Scripture. It doesn’t define a creed that demands the same sort of allegiance folks give to their Bibles or Qurans — it’s a document about means, not ends.

As near as I can tell, there are no reported cases of suicide bombers inspired by the due process clause. And I’ve missed the press accounts of Baptists shooting up nightclubs or concert halls.

But I have not missed the press reports about the threat posed by radical Islam. I am wary of the Muslim world. So is Donald Trump. I like that about Trump.

Trump erred in going after the Khans; he is seemingly incapable of walking away from a fight — any fight, no matter how low the stakes. The far better course would have been for Trump to respect the Khans’ loss and to refocus the discussion.

“Yes, they lost a son, a hero, who sacrificed his life to protect his men,” he should have said.

“He was protecting his men from a suicide bomber from a region in the world rife with violence. Let’s be careful about opening our borders to folks from that region. Radical Islam killed this young Muslim man. It has taken aim at us, too.”

There’s a good chance some of the last words Capt. Khan heard before he died in Iraq were “Allahu Akbar” — the suicide bomber’s tribute to a savage vision of God. His father can tell us all day long that is a mere prayer. That’s the sort of willful blindness that gets folks killed.

Beatifying the parents of a dead soldier does nothing to combat radical Islam.

Khizr Khan’s energies would be better spent persuading his co-religionists that radical Islam is a worldwide cancer.

Move on, Mr. Trump. Radical Islam remains a threat, no matter how maudlin the remarks of Khzir Khan. The Khans made themselves into a regrettable sideshow.

Norm Pattis, a criminal defense and civil rights lawyer with offices in Bethany and New Haven, blogs at www.pattisblog.com.

Well while you might just be starting your day there, it’s rather late here, I’m a wee bit in me cups from drinking more than a few Sazerac cocktails in tribute to Pete Fountain.

I’m sure you’re wondering why he was so important to me. My parents had a Best Of album of his in the early 70’s and it was from listening to it that I got an important life message early on in my life that has had a lot to do with who I became and the life I’ve led. At the time I was reading Tolkien in secret as my father strongly disapproved of my fondness for reading science fiction or fantasy. He called it escapism and said if I wanted to read I should be reading my school books or books related to my school work otherwise I should be working in the yard or at some other such chore so he wouldn’t have to do it.

One of Tolkien’s key messages/theme repeated often in his works is the famous quote “Not all who wander are lost.” It was during this time period I heard Pete’s rendition of ‘Make Your Own Kind of Music”, a song made popular by The Mommas & The Pappas. Pete’s version of the song led me to obtain a 45 (remember those?) of the Mommas & Poppas version. From that I committed the lyrics to memory and would sing them in my head silently every time I heard the song or every time my father went off on my reading  Science Fiction or Fantasy books. Tolkien and the song’s message resonated within me and I knew it to be a great truth. I have always lived my life by that code and tried to teach it to others with greater and lesser degrees of success.

Anyway that’s going to have to be all for now. I see Thursday has my bed turned down and is waiting for me hoping for an early start on her day no doubt.

Until next week by which time I should have had my new mouse (not a trackball this time) and relearned how to use a mouse properly, (I’ve used strictly trackballs for well over 25 years now) but should have figured out all the controls and programing for the alleged 11 possible buttons  as well.

Well, It’s been an interesting week.  As Karl pointed out, my last weeks theme was way off.  For some reason, I thought July 30th was June 30th and was celebrating International Lasagna Day.

And looking at today’s header, you might think that I’m confused again.  I’m not.  I know it’s not February 9th – National Pizza Day…
or September 5th – National Cheese Pizza Day…
or October 11th – National Sausage Pizza Day…
or November 12th – National Pizza with Everything Except Anchovies Day…
or even just October – National Pizza Month.

Nope.  I know that.

But I also know that any food that rates 4 National Holidays and even a Holi-month, a food that 94% of people eat on a regular basis, consuming an average of 46 slices per year (that’s a light snack for me), and a food that, on a global scale, over 5 billion pizzas are sold every year.

Yup, I know all that.  I also know that, like lasagna, pizza is God’s food.  One of the very few foods you’ll be able to get when you get to heaven.  I also know that ANY day is a good day for pizza.  So, if you’d all like to sit back, relax, we’re having pizza for breakfast this morning. 

So, …

Truer words have never been spoken.  I’m sure I’m not the only one who was graduating from high school, blinked, and almost 40 years have gone by.

Fred is 34 years old and he is still single. One day, a friend asked, “Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will be a good wife?” Fred replied, “Actually, I’ve found many women that I have wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn’t like them.” His friend thinks for a moment and says, “I’ve got the perfect solution, why not find a girl who’s just like your mother?” A few months later, they meet again and his friend says, “Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?”  With a frown on his face, Fred answers, “Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much.” The friend said, “Then what’s the problem?” Sadly, Fred replied, “My father doesn’t like her.“

It’s amazing to me how so many of our fellow Americans do not know the law.  I know there are a shit-ton of laws, regulations and the like out there, but you would think that at least the politicians, whose job it is to enact, create and monitor those laws, would know a little bit about it.
Recently, Donald Trump has been getting crap about limiting immigration to certain groups, most especially the Muslims.
Well, come to find out, that is already legal to do so.  Let me tell you a little about the McCarran-Walter Act of 1952:

 

Kinda puts it into perspective, doesn’t it?

I wanted to share this one with you because it is such an odd picture.  It reminds me of one of those old View-Master pictures where you would put it up to your eyes and get a real 3D picture.  Remember those?

Apparently they are still being made and still out there.

 

I was sent a bunch of pictures about our brothers in blue.  I have the greatest respect for all Law Enforcement Officers.  Having worked with them for many years and seen from the inside what they go through and how much they care for others more than themselves, I thought it would be a good idea to share these with you.

 

 

WARNING: Do not attempt to drink or eat while watching this video.  DL&LL Enterprises will not be held responsible for any medical, electrical, or technical charges stemming from the shoot of food or liquid from your nose or any other bodily orifice onto your lap, laptop, keyboard, spouse or large muscular person near you in whatever coffee shop you happen to be watching this in.
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

See, I thought I was dreaming and saw this woman floating across the water towards me.  She got closer and closer and I became more and more attracted to her.  She came right up next to me and I thought, “Hey.  Why not?  This is just a dream, anyway.”
My trial date is next Tuesday.

Yes.  I know.  You know someone just like that, too.

Okay, this is just friggin’ CRAZY!

 

Luke Aikens’ latest stunt has set the record for the highest jump without a parachute, and it all was captured on live television. The professional skydiver began this dangerous activity at age 12 and since then has completed over 18,000 jumps. Check out this video to see how fast he fell and the first thing he does after he lands.

Dang!  My heart was in my throat watching the video and I knew how it worked out!

Okay, so I got this from my dad, aka: Papa Dragon Most Senior.  I know you’ve seen it before.

So, it occurs to me, that if my Dad is still waiting for that “Old Enough To Know Better” to kick in, then I got nothing to worry about.  And I got a ways to go before I need worry about it.  Therefore, I just need to sit back and enjoy it now.

So, here we go again.  With as much crap as the government and the administration is putting us through, there’s no wonder that I have so much material to offer to you here.

Even Bernie knows!

Yup, that’s the way it is.  We need to be tolerant of them, but NONE of them are tolerant of any of US.

It’s not a matter of being rich, it’s a matter of being rich and willing to kill anyone who gets in your way.

Ain’t that the truth

So now, we need to wash our brains out with something much nicer.  To wit,

Yup, you got an extra large dose of funnies today.  I think we all need it.  I think the world is giving us enough shit that we can afford to just sit here and laugh.

I want to leave you here, with a smile on your face, ready to face another week.

Be well my friends, be safe and happy until we meet again.

Yup it’s Wednesday again and that is Wednesday on the lounge waiting for me.

Since I plan on spending a lot of time checking items off on the To Do (to?) Wednesday (you decide which I mean, the day or the girl) enough with the chit chat. Wadda ya say we gets this ball rolling?

 

Ginny sends the following under the premise that anyone actually believes there is such a thing as too much coffee.

You’ve Been Drinking Too Much Coffee When..

Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
You lick your coffeepot clean.
You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
You’ve built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
People get dizzy just watching you.
Instant coffee takes too long.
You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can.
You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee.
You’re offended when people use the word “brew” to mean beer.
You name your cats “Cream” and “Sugar.”
You get drunk just so you can sober up.
Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position.
You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
You don’t even wait for the water to boil anymore.
You introduce your spouse as your “Coffee-mate.”
You think CPR stands for “Coffee Provides Resuscitation.”

As I was saying in my opening things are progressing very smoothly here. Shown above is Thursday taking a break from her vacation to spend a little time fondling the barrel of that 50 cal Browning M-2 machine gun and completing the inventory the ammo in my personal armory. She claims long heavy barrels just do it for her.

 

Oops! I think I feel those coffee powers heading for the dark roast side today! Wow! She really took a face full didn’t she?

Babylon 5 Actor Jerry Doyle Dead at 60

“I’ve seen my country lately. Frankly, I don’t like what I see. Nevertheless, it’s not too late to restore the great and unique wonder that is the United States. We are the beacon of hope for the world, and we will remain so as long as we stand up for our principles.”  – Jerry Doyle

Actor, author and radio host Jerry Doyle, best known for playing Michael Garibaldi on the ’90s sci-fi series Babylon 5, was found dead in his Las Vegas home Wednesday, he was 60. Doyle was born July 16, 1956, and grew up in Brooklyn.

The cause of death is not yet confirmed, but no foul play is suspected. An autopsy is pending.

Doyle’s biggest acting credit was as Garibaldi, the recovering alcoholic security chief on  the TV series Babylon 5.  He also played the character in the TV movie that preceded the series, “Babylon 5: The Gathering.” The series ran from 1994 until 1998. In 1999, Doyle was featured in a follow-up movie, “Babylon 5: A Call to Arms.” During the series’ run, Doyle was briefly married to his co-star, Andrea Thompson, who played the telepath Talia Winters from 1995 to 1997.

Before he began acting, he worked as a corporate jet pilot and a stockbroker.

After Babylon 5, he transitioned into conservative talk radio, and hosted the nationally-syndicated The Jerry Doyle Show on the Talk Radio Network. He also founded the news website EpicTimes.

“It’s not Left vs Right, it’s right vs wrong!” EpicTimes was an idea born from former Babylon 5 star, and top Talk Radio Host. Instead of tuning out from the “noise”, he decided to “tune in” and be part of the solution, not the problem.

“I never realized that growing up in Brooklyn, flying jets, working on Wall Street and starring in a sci-fi series was the prerequisite for the fast-paced demands of talk radio,” said Doyle. “But, if that’s what it takes to succeed, I’m glad I did it all.”

Listeners enjoyed Doyle’s anecdotal humor, satirical observations and well-rounded social commentary. His ability to choose compelling topics provokes lively conversations on the issues of the day. The program is caller-driven, issue-oriented, and fast-paced. Listeners enjoy Doyle’s wit, as well as his ability to seriously engage callers from across the nation in fascinating conversations.

In memory of Jerry Doyle and his choosing to be part of the solution  rather than part or the problem or the apathetic majority, the above graphic (or a similar one) will from now on replace the Parting Shot Header in any commentary I post.

Those interested in reading more about Jerry’s book can do so here:

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6620418-have-you-seen-my-country-lately

and you can buy an eBook copy here:

https://www.amazon.com/Have-You-Seen-Country-Lately-ebook/dp/B0035G08NU/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1469991502&sr=8-1

Jerry ya fine Irish lad, this ones for you pal, the proprieties must be observed at all times after all.

 

Your wit and wisdom will be missed Jerry. I hope I can manage to fill 1/100th of your being part of the solution foot print.

 

 

YES, I’m aware that’s Impish’s new ride. Point made.

Some of you have asked about our weather and seen some of the photos on The Weather Channel of large pieces of hail on the ground after some of our Texas sized Thunderstorms. Well this is a photo of what things look like after sustained large hail blows through an area. This took all of about 5 minutes to blow through and accomplish this.

While we’re on the subject of Texas weather, in the comments section, about a week ago, I mentioned that with out careful attention to things like sunscreen, hats, wearing light colors and keeping your arm off window ledge in your car when driving down here the sun would fry you and/or literally burn the hide off of you. Case in point.

Southern State of Mind – Darius Rucker

 

Have you ever seen a sign for a business and thought: “What were they thinking?” I know I certainly have. This is a collection of the very best business signs spotted in English-speaking territories around the world. I hope they make you chuckle as much as they made me! Without further ado, let the silliness begin:

OH YEAH! Coffee powers are definitely headed to the Dark Roast side today!

NO! You cannot meet the girl either! YES the dog is extremely protective of her. YES that especially means you too Impish.

Bad Boys Music Video (Parody)

 

(Sorry about all that moaning coming out of Impish, its just too easy and too much fun tormenting the big lug!)

Ok get these airbag equipped knee pads on Ginny’s knees while Paul k9 gets the backside airbag panties on her. Someone spread them cushions all around her . good now strap her in that rescue harness and hook the ropes to the shoulder points. Makes sure everything is snug we don’t want her taking a swam dive in a minute or gastronomic euphoria since we’re dealing with more than one of ‘those’ recipes today..

Aromatic Garlic Shrimp Pockets

Keep shrimp nice and juicy with a pocket of herbs, butter, garlic and a touch of chili. 

Shrimp is a flavor-packed appetizer that’s still relatively light. Keep it moist and delicious by packing it in a foil wrap before putting it on the grill. It’s as simple as mixing together the ingredients and letting the heat do the rest!

 

 

Ingredients:

1 lb. large shrimp
4 cloves garlic, cut into strips
2 red chilies
½ cup fresh cilantro
1 tsp. thyme
½ tsp. cayenne pepper
1 tsp. ginger, minced
½ tsp. salt
1 tsp. black pepper
2 Tbsp. lemon juice
1 tsp. sesame oil
4 tsp. butter

Directions:

Remove the shrimp shells, if attached, by working your thumb nail along the underside and pushing upward.

This will remove the shell and legs. Leave the tail section, as this makes for a useful handle if you’re eating with your fingers.

Remove the vein along the back of the shrimp with the tip of a paring knife, then transfer the shrimp to a colander and

rinse under cold running water. Shake off any excess water.

Peel the garlic cloves and shred into thin rounds or strips, then cut off the heads of the chili peppers and chop the chilies until fine.

Discard the seeds first if you don’t like too much spice.

Rough-chop the cilantro, stalks as well as leaves. If you don’t like the distinctive aroma of cilantro, substitute parsley.

Mix the thyme, cayenne, ginger, salt and pepper in a resealable plastic bag, then transfer in all of the previous ingredients.

Add the lemon juice and sesame oil, then the shrimp. Toss until the shrimp are coated and refrigerate for 30 minutes to marinate.

Tips:

Aluminum foil is easiest to manipulate, but parchment paper looks more delicate. If you choose the latter, you will need to fold over the top carefully to create a seal.

Always keep raw shellfish refrigerated until use, and do not refreeze shrimp once they’ve been thawed.

I used half a packet of Crushed Red Pepper Flakes the come with our pizza deliveries instead of the fresh red chilies because we could not find them in our Produce Department and were smart enough to avoid the Thai ones. It worked just fine.

If you are grilling these, skip the parchment, unless you like seeing dinner go up in flames.

Save a clove of garlic and toast some bias cut slices of baguette brushed with a little good olive oil on the  other side of the grill while these are cooking. Rub the toasted bread with the cut clove or garlic  as soon as they come off the grill and serve with the shrimp.

OK! Let’s get a Ginny status check before we move along. Still upright, good. Slight wobble, well that’s pretty much the norm for her so that’s a thumbs up to. Spotters and safety line men in position and ready? Good, we can proceed to the next recipe then.

Black Forest Trifle

The problem with Trifles…

QUICK! GRAB HER SHE’S GOING DOWN!

Nice save support team! Those airbags are damned expensive and only good once. Here slid her into this chair and use the 5 point seat belt on her.

Now, as I was about to say, is nobody wants to make Trifles anymore because they have a problem with them. They are time consuming to make and a bit fussy to assemble. Plus you have to have a special bowl to serve one properly that (if you are lucky you might get occasional double duty out of as a layered salad serving dish or as an ersatz punch bowl for a bridal/baby shower.

Well here is one that is a bit faster to make, though doesn’t address the need for the special bowl. However wait until the end and I’ll tell you what I figured out to do to make this extra fancy dessert fast enough for everyday and to do away with the need for the Trifle Dish.

 

Black Forest Trifle

This Black Forest Trifle combines rich, fudge chocolate brownies with tart ruby red cherry pie filling for the ultimate chocolate cherry dessert. Whipped topping provides a light creamy finish to the entire treat.

 

 

 

 

 

Ingredients:

1 box (18.3 oz) Fudge Brownie Mix
¼ cup water
2/3 cup vegetable oil
2 eggs
2 boxes (3.9 oz.)  Instant Chocolate Fudge Pudding and Pie Filling
    3½ cups Skim Milk
    1 can (21 oz.) Cherry Pie Filling
    2 tubs (8 oz.)  Whipped Cream Topping, thawed
    ¼ cup mini chocolate chips

Directions:

1. Prepare brownies with water, oil and eggs according to package directions and allow to cool.
2. While brownies are baking, mix pudding mix with skim milk until smooth. Cover and refrigerate until ready to use.
3. Cut brownies into small 1″x1″ squares. Layer half of the brownies into the bottom of a large trifle dish or clear glass bowl. Top with half of the prepared pudding, half of the cherry pie filling and one tub of the whipped topping.
4. Repeat layering with the remaining ingredients. Sprinkle the top of the trifle with mini chocolate chips. Refrigerate the trifle until ready to serve.

Ok, lets remember our 2 basic issues with making Trifles shall we? Time consuming and special dishes.

This one is a wee bit faster because your not making a cake from scratch for the Trifle you’re using a brownie mix instead so you pick up  about 10 minutes there even if you used a box cake mix. How’d you like to be done with the cake/brownie part in that saved 10 minutes and have zero mess to clean up instead?

Simply hit the bakery at your favorite large chain grocery store. They sell brownies in 8×8 foil pans premade! All you need to do is chop them up! Often times they’ll also sell something called ‘Brownie Bites’ round little puck like two bite brownies that you can quarter just as easily for this recipe. This works well if you are make 4 or less servings.

As for the bowl, We have Pyrex ramekins (they can as part of a set with plastic lids) which are about 4 to 4.5” across and about 3.5” high. This is just about serving size anyhow so we just make them directly into the bowls. This has the added benefits of presenting everyone with a pretty individual Trifle and being far easier to store than the unwieldy Trifle bowl in the refrigerator.

But Lethal I don’t have any Pyrex ramekins and Pyrex is expensive! True dat, but you really don’t need them.  While at the store picking up your prebaked brownies, just hie thee over to the party aisle and get you some clear plastic 10 to 12 ounce cups. BOOM! instant disposable individual Trifle bowls that still fit far better in the fridge than the big specialty bowl! Plus who can argue with the added benefit of not having to wash the Pyrex ramekins?

OK let’s have a Ginnster check please! Continual knee tremors? Salivating? Slight moans. Ok tip the chair back to 45 degrees, get her a drool bib and a glass of our next recipe. This feast need a drink and we’re going for it. Steady now Ginny.

Spiked Watermelon Lemonade

 

Watermelon is always a big hit for the kids at summertime barbecues. So why not turn this delicious and juicy fruit into a cocktail adults will love? This make-ahead, refreshingly cool drink blends sweet seedless watermelon with freshly made lemonade and finishes it off with a punch of vodka.

 

 

 

 

Ingredients:

5 cups seeded watermelon, cut into chunks
2 cups water
1 cup fresh lemon juice
¾ cup sugar
2 cups vodka [I recommend Tito’s if you can find it outside of Texas, otherwise consider Lemon Vodka]

Directions:

1.  Add all the ingredients to a blender and blend until combined.
2. Pour the drink into a serving pitcher and chill in the refrigerator for 2 hours.
3.  Give it a good stir and serve over ice with a wedge of lemon.

I find the seedless Personal Watermelons work best for this as the watermelon particles blend up finer/smoother than their giant cousins.
Therefore you eliminate and potential need for pressing through a strainer.  Also any seeds you do come across will be few,far between and immature so not nearly as bitter if one does sneak into the blender.

Ginny? You still with us? Ginster? Uhh…We’ll check on Gin later, she apparently needs a minute…and possibly another glass of Watermelon Lemonade for Adults.

Toby Keith – As Good As I Once Was

 

I’ve got the neighbor from hell above me. Found this today. I think I might be sneaking up there with a copy and some tape soon.

Gabriel Iglesias Work for Disney on Ron White Salute to the Troops

 

That’s Thursday, and I can’t wait for tomorrow!

As you enter the huge canopy that has been set up over the whole camp area where you normally celebrate that which is Dragon Laffs, a delicious aroma hits you square in the face.  Something luxurious, mouth-watering, mind-numbing.

You are led to your usual place where you are handed your favorite cup of coffee, the pastry of your choice and you sit there, spellbound by the intense sense of goodness and delight that is carried along with the breeze from something fantastic cooking nearby.

Impish Dragon comes out on stage with an apron and a tall white chef’s hat and is holding a pan of goodness that is setting off your taste buds.

Today, June 30th is National Lasagna Day.

Lasagna is, like pizza and a few other Italian dishes, God’s food.  When we die and go to Heaven, it is one of the few foods that will be served.  Therefore, the creation of the perfect lasagna is as much art, as it is cooking.

I am, with no undue modesty, a lasagna connoisseur; a lasagna gastronome; a lasagna gourmand; a lasagna hedonist; a …

Someone in the audience mumbles, “That Thesaurus he got for Christmas sure has come in handy.”

I’m sure if Lethal were here he’d say something about me getting a Thesaurus for Christmas or something and if Ginny or Diaman were here, they’d be signaling for me to get on with it, so let me just send your eyes to a little article that was written by my human side many years ago.  It’s called: Lasagna Bob and you can find it here: http://www.epicurean.com/articles/lasagna-bob.html and as you read, I’ll return to the kitchen and finish off your after ezine meal.

Today, everyone gets lasagna and it’s on me.  So….

Well, before we start laughing, let me add this part in.  You’ll probably laugh, but it’s not really funny to me.
As I write this, it is Monday morning at about 0100 hrs.  I’ve been to bed twice and I just can’t seem to get to sleep.  It’s not that I’m not tired, I am.  I did a lot of outside work today in the 107° heat index.  But now, my mind just won’t shut down.  Every little sound startles me awake…and there are a lot of sounds.
It just so happens that I have a dog who is afraid of thunder.
And guess what it’s doing outside?
Yup.
So her and I are back downstairs and I’m trying to keep myself busy.  It’s almost not even worth going to bed for the little over three hours that I have left before I have to be up at 0445 hrs for work.
Okay, now that you are done laughing at me being up babysitting a dog who’s afraid of thunder, let’s get back to the real laughter.

This was sent to me by Karl. who’s also known as K².  The only thing I have to say is that I believe you Karl.

It’s going to be one of those days…
The voices in my head are fighting.
My imaginary friend is running with scissors.
And at one point, one of my personalities wandered off.

Hey.  I’ve been there! 

Okay, so if you look in the dictionary under the word hypocryte, this guys picture will be the ohly explaination that is necessary.  Of course, he’s got to be a democrate.  I only read the headline and I knew that!

Homeowner puts up lawn signs calling for cop killings, then has audacity to do this

Lesson unlearned.

Central Ohio ABC affiliate WSYX has a story that may you speechless. Sadly, the homeowner responsible for this atrocity is anything but speechless.

The man, who is unnamed in the article, described solely as a 65-year-old retiree, placed signs on his property in the town of Richwood. One of the signs read, “A good cop is a dead cop.” Another of the signs is shown above.

The outrageous signs were noticed by passersby and posted to social media. The following day, someone from the same community defaced the signs. The homeowner found them on the ground torn and covered with fresh tire tracks.

So what did the homeowner do? You guessed it: he called 9-1-1!

An audio of his call is embedded in the video below at around 0:55.
So, I couldn’t get the video to copy here, so you’ll have to go to the website {http://libertyunyielding.com/2016/07/24/homeowner-puts-lawn-signs-calling-cop-killings-audacity/} and I’ll leave the rest of the article for you to read there as well.  Trust me, it’s worth checking out.
I really couldn’t believe the guy had the audacity to call the cops!  “Liberal Logic”…the biggest oxymoron of them all.

 

Here’s a picture of me drawn and colored by one of the kids in our summer day-care.  Yes, we are one of those kinds of employers who have things like day-care, a place for employees to relax on their breaks, thought circles, … think of all the special things you’ve seen at Google and Microsoft work centers and multiply it by ten times and that’s what it’s like working at DL&LL Enterprises.

Okay, I have to do it, I can’t help it.  It is just pissing me off so much that I can’t keep quiet. And since this is my e-zine, I figure I can rant if I want to.

Let’s look at some more headlines.

AUSTRALIA SAYS THEY GAVE THE CLINTON FOUNDATION $88 MILLION…GUESS WHAT THE CLINTONS REPORTED GETTING

And the answer to that question is less than half!  For the full story, go here:  http://dailycaller.com/2016/07/27/exclusive-clinton-foundation-got-20m-from-down-under-or-88m/

The thing that pisses me off more than anything else, is that not only is she (they) being charged with this list of crimes that just keeps getting longer and longer, but the media isn’t screaming about it and there are STILL so many people in our country that are not only voting for her, working for her, and proud of her, but they actually have the philistinism to think she will be better than anyone else for our country’s president!

Oh, and this picture says it all so perfectly!

Am I the only one who sees and understands this crap?  Why isn’t everyone else pissed off??!!  NOBODY is supposed to be above the law!

 

Moving on…
For now!

 

 

Okay, this is great!

I have no idea where James Corden came from, but he is really good.  I haven’t actually watched the show, it’s kind of out of my time availability zone, but the YouTube’s I’ve seen have all been outstanding.

Thanks to Jeannie for the last two.  This baby cracked me up to the point I spit coffee out of my mouth this morning.

A lot of you have been sending me Fantasy and Dragon pix and I deeply appreciate it.  It’s been great fun.  Here’s one of our many personal secretaries throughout the complex.  No, she’s not playing dress up, that’s her usual garb.  I keep trying to tell you guys, that this is an awesome place to work.

I had to share this next video with you guys.  Stop motion extreme sports using one of our favorite childhood toys…

The mind boggles at how many frames, shot one by one, this video required. 

The Richland, WA Police report finding a man’s body in the Columbia River, near the confluence of the Yakima River, at Columbia park.

The dead man’s name will not be released until his family has been notified. 

The victim apparently drowned due to excessive marijuana consumption.

He was wearing black fishnet stockings, a red garter belt, a pink G-string, a strap-on dildo, purple lipstick, and a ‘Hillary for President’ T-shirt. He also had a cucumber in his rectum.

The police removed the Hillary T-shirt to spare his family any unnecessary embarrassment.

In spite of what we sometimes think, the Police do care.

Okay, so here’s another one that is outstanding!!!!

That had to be one of the most amazing sights EVER caught on camera!

I can’t hold off any longer!  It’s time!  I’ve got to do it!!

Okay, let’s just jump right in there…

And now the guy who runs/started WikiLeaks says that his next reveal will have more than enough proof to put Hillary in jail!  The only thing I can think of to add to that is for him to hurry up!

She’s following in Obama’s footsteps.  He rigged the election in 2012.  It’s impossible for more than 100% of any district to vote on anything!  But when several districts had over 120% (impossible!) vote for Obama and NOBODY for McCain, yeah, that was honest.

But Hillary is so broke!  They were so poor when they left the White House when Bill was the chief thief, that they had to take some of the government property out of the White House.

Yup, it didn’t take someone long to go down that well worn path.

It is so eerie!

OH! OH!  I need some of that, too!

WISDOM FOR THE AGES

– If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they’d eventually find me attractive.
– I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom, until they’re flashing behind you.
– Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.
– I changed my password to “incorrect” so whenever I forget it the computer will remind me with, “Your password is incorrect.”
– Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
– I’m great at multi- tasking- – I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
– If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
– Never tell your problems to anyone, because 20 percent don’t care and the other 80 percent are glad you have them.
– Doesn’t expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected?
– Take my advice – I’m not using it.
– My wife and I were happy for twenty years; then we met.
– I hate it when people use big words just to make themselves sound perspicacious.
– Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they’re at home when you wish they were.
– Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
– I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it’s been doing is gathering dust.
– Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more- talented fool.
– I’ll bet you $4,567 you can’t guess how much I owe my bookie.
– Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
– If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you’ll have trouble putting on your pants.
– A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
– Ever stop to think and forget to start again?
– My wife got 8 out 10 on her driver’s test- – the other two guys managed to jump out of her way.
– There may be no excuse for laziness, but I’m still looking.
– Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.
– Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
– Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly?
– Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the do- it- yourself type.
– I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.
– The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don’t have to mow it.
– I like long walks, especially when they’re taken by people who annoy me.
– I was going to wear my camouflage shirt today, but I couldn’t find it.
– If tomatoes are technically a fruit, is ketchup a smoothie?
– Money is the root of all wealth.
– No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.

So, since this issue seems like it’s going to be huge anyway, let’s throw in another section

I want to know how the hell he got the car up at that angle in the first place!

You gotta wonder what there is on the side of that building that this guy has to clean off in the first place.  I’m figuring it’s the remains of the last guy who took the job of wall cleaner.

Yeah, that looks like the best way to get up there to fix the cable.

You wonder how they got the idea for the Ewok village?

There is no reason in the world I can come up with for this one.

Alright, so it seems as though we’re also going to have a bunch of videos too…

A doctor that had been seeing an 80-year-old woman for most of her life finally retired. At her next checkup, the new doctor told her to bring a list of all the medicines that had been prescribed for her.As the doctor was looking through these his eyes grew wide as he realized Grandma had a prescription for birth control pills. “Mrs. Smith, do you realize  these are birth control pills ?” 

“Yes, they help me sleep at night.”

“Mrs. Smith, I assure you there is absolutely nothing in these that that could possibly help you sleep !”

She reached out and patted the young doctor’s knee and said, “Yes, dear, I know that. But every morning, I grind one up and mix it in the glass of orange juice that my 16-year-old Granddaughter drinks. and believe me it definitely helps me sleep at night.”

I need about a dozen of these signs please.

A man was riding on a full bus minding his own business when the gorgeous woman next to him started to breast-feed her baby. The baby wouldn’t take it so she said, “Come on sweetie, eat it all up or I’ll have to give it to this nice man next to us.”

Five minutes later the baby was still not feeding, so she said, “Come on, honey. Take it or I’ll give it to this nice man here.”

A few minutes later the anxious man blurted out, “Come on kid. Make up your mind ! I was supposed to get off four stops ago!!

For the last 20 minutes or so, there have been rows and rows of fairies bring out pans of lasagna, toasty garlic bread, many different bottles of wine, and all the plates and silverware and other accessories that you need for a full on Italian meal.  Impish Dragon makes another appearance and you barely hear his words for the glorious aroma assaulting your nose.

And that, dear campers, is where we’re going to leave it go for this week.

I hope you all had fun, found something to laugh at, something to get pissed off over, or something that brought you some sort of emotion.  If so, then I was successful for another week.

Be well, be happy, be safe.

Now, help yourself to all the lasagna you would like.  There is plenty, more than enough and the fairies will be here until after dinner tonight if you would like to keep eating.  Enjoy!

Morning folks!

I’m coming to you from my makeshift equivalent of the Oval Office which we’ve taken to calling the Covered U Deck. That’s another of my islands the sun is setting behind on the horizon and the disturbance in the water is actually one of the local indigenous semi mythical creatures with whom I’ve reached an agreement on patrol keeping my little Green Democratic Republic safe from waterborne threats. I should probably mention that in this photo he’s actually about 20 feet below the surface and he goes by.

Creation of infrastructure and general improvements are proceeding well. I’ve opened immigration to Veterans of all services with special consideration shown to our wounded warriors and homeless Veterans that want a hand up not a hand out.

The combination of their knowledge and skills coupled with the natives desire for a better life is proving nothing short of miraculous. Both in terms of positive changes to the habitat here but to both sets of people as well.

Well the ocean breezes tell me its just about dinner time here, I can smell the grilled seafood and meat as well as the fresh coffee. I’ve discovered coffee beans growing wild here that rival Kona coffee when properly roasted and the natives grow some tobacco which I think just might rival some of the Cuban and Honduran if cured properly so I have my first 2 artisan small batch crops for potential export.

There’s the dinner bell! Got to get to it while I can get a decent choice. Enjoy the issue.

 

Personally with Hell Boy straightening out his procrastination proclivity, I’d give him about a 50/50 chance of being the dead body! I’ll even up that to 85% if he goes back the Hokey Pokey Clinic.

A man was riding on a full bus minding his own business when the gorgeous woman next to him started to breast-feed her baby.
The baby wouldn’t take it so she said, “Come on sweetie, eat it all up or I’ll have to give it to this nice man next to us.”Five minutes later the baby was still not feeding, so she said, “Come on, honey. Take it or I’ll give it to this nice man here.”A few minutes later the anxious man blurted out, “Come on kid. Make up your mind ! I was supposed to get off four stops ago!!

The Top 5 Songs of the Summer

Every summer the pop culture media goes nuts proclaiming the Song of the Summer.
Last year the consensus choice was “Can’t Feel My Face,” 2014 was “Happy” and 2013
was either “Get Lucky” or “Blurred Lines.”

1. This Is What You Shaved For
2. Tan by Your Man
3. Smells Like Hawaiian Tropic SPF 30
4. Rolling in the Deet

And the Number One Song of the Summer…

1. Can’t Stop the Peeling

 

Mungo Jerry – In The Summertime ORIGINAL 1970

 

A woman and her 12-year-old son were riding in a taxi in Detroit. It was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings.”Mom,” said the boy, “what are all those women doing ?” They’re waiting for their husbands to get off work,” she replied.The taxi driver turns around and says, “Geez lady, why don’t you tell him the truth ? They’re hookers, boy! They have sex with men for money.”

The little boy’s eyes get wide and he says, “Is that true Mom ? “His mother, glaring hard at the driver, answers “Yes”.After a few minutes the kid asks, “Mom, if those women have babies, what happens to them ? She said, ” Most of them become taxi drivers ! ”

 

That Van Damme guy hasn’t got anything on me!

 

Never mind Pokémon, gotta catch all the babes!

Zac Brown Band – Toes

 

Why Are We Killing Each Other?

 

What’s the Matter with ‘All Lives Matter’

David Bedrick  Huffington Post 8/24/2015 07:55 am 07:55:26 | Updated Aug 24, 2015

George Zimmerman, a white male neighborhood watchman, shot and killed Trayvon Martin, a black male youth. Zimmerman was charged, tried, and acquitted in July 2013. In the aftermath, a grassroots movement began titled Black Lives Matter.

Black Lives Matter is working to “broaden the conversation” around race from the legal system and black poverty to the burdens on black women, children, black queer and trans folks, and blacks with disabilities.

In response, some white folks have countered with the phrase, “All Lives Matter.” While this is seemingly a more empowering as well as a diversity affirming response, it is neither.

In the Shadow of ‘All Lives Matter’

1. In the shadow of ‘All Lives Matter’ is a form of willful colorblindness — the erasure of the issue of race.

When people say “All Lives Matter” in response to “Black Lives Matter,” they are not simply opening their arms to the greater diversity of humanity. Instead, they are taking race out of the conversation. While the statement masquerades as a bright and inclusive light, in the shadow of this statement hides a willful ignorance of America’s racist past and present.

There is not doubt that racism exists today. The research evidence is vast, clear and widely available from differential stop and frisk rates, sentencing levels and job hiring.

A most telling statistic about the difference in the lack of valuation of a black life comes from a study conducted by Allan Collard-Wexler, an NYU Stern School economist: “[T]he cost of adopting a black baby needs to be $38,000 lower than the cost of a white baby, in order to make parents indifferent to race.”

Adding insult to injury, asserting that all lives matter in response to black folks declaring that black lives matter, turns our eyes away from acknowledging America’s racist past, functioning as a form of dismissal or denial.

Through the constitution, slavery and Jim Crow laws, America stood for the belief that some lives were more human, more worthy — that some live mattered more. How can we forget that America codified in its constitution (the same constitution that some insist must be strictly and literally interpreted in its original form) the notion that a black life was only considered to be 3/5ths of a white life?

If we stop highlighting and focusing on black lives, but instead focus more globally and generally on all lives, then we become complicit in not seeing color as a factor in American life. Putting it simply, if we erase race, we won’t see racism.

2. In the shadow of ‘All Lives Matter’ lurks the privilege white folks have to not experience their own lives in racial terms.

Let’s face it, most white people don’t regularly think about themselves as white. We are not made to think about our race, because we are not living in a pervasive systemic atmosphere that injures us because of our skin color. As such, we easily think of ourselves as a “just a person,” as a human being belonging to the human family.

But when a person is regularly injured because of a quality, it is veritably impossible to enjoy the luxury of ignoring that quality. As a Jewish man, my Eastern European brothers and sisters could not ignore the fact that they were Jewish. If they “forgot,” they were quickly reminded! Women in boardrooms, disabled people getting on a bus, gay teens at a high school dance, and black youth in a school cafeteria are all aware of their social identity; straight white able bodied males ignore their social identity.

They enjoy the privilege of being free from that concern. (See also Beverly Daniel Tatum’s masterwork, Why Are All The Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?)

When a white person responds to the statement “Black Lives Matter” by countering with “All Lives Matter” they exhibit a blindness to the privilege of living outside of a painful and marginalizing lens that highlights their race; a privilege not enjoyed by black and brown people.

In the words of Jarune Uwujaren, “[I]f you have trouble seeing race or are tired of people making things about race, realize that if they could, most people of color would ignore race too.”

3. In the shadow of ‘All Lives Matter’ is an aggressive resistance to focusing on the value of black lives.

The statement, “All Lives Matter” did not arise in a vacuum. It was not born of a passion for the value of all life; it is not a world-wide social movement for justice. It was a response, a retort, a counter-point to the statement “Black Lives Matter.” While not everyone utters these words with this intent, the phrase nonetheless functions as a dismissal.

As such, we cannot only evaluate it purely in terms of its accuracy (i.e, “Isn’t it true that all lives matter? Wouldn’t it be good to live in a world where all lives mattered?”) or as a general statement of care for all beings, including black beings. It is not simply said as a matter of truth or a statement of values. Instead, it’s a rebuttal to the statement “Black Lives Matter.”

Instead of communicating a love for all beings, “All Lives Matter” are words of negation, repudiation, and refutation. They are words of debate; they are fighting words. What are the users of these words fighting? Simple: That Black lives matter!

On a personal note, beyond all logical argument, I confess to having my tears flow and my heart melt when I first went to the Black Lives Matter website and found recorded black voices completing the phrase “In a world where black lives matter, I imagine….” One particular recording was made by Satchel, a four year old black boy, whose sweet giggling joy erupted when he said, “In a world where black lives matter, I imagine there’s a lot of tickling.”

In a world that would resist or belittle the declaration that Black Lives Matter, that would censor those who speak out for the beauty, power, intelligence and moral authority of black people, I fear there would be far too many black children doing a lot less smiling, laughing and giggling and a lot more hungering for food, safety, and a sense of self worth.

Funeral Procession for Senior Corporal Lorne Ahrens one of the Slain Dallas Police Officers

Infowars Reporter Joe Biggs Found this video on Twitter. It’s of a Man named Terrence Williams Going off on Black Lives Matter in what might be one of the best rants of the year.

Uncensored American Goes Off On Black Lives Matter

 

Well boys and girls that’s it for this week because the sun has indeed set and its time for this leprechaun to  follow the examples of Chesney and Kracker- namely to stop working and start partying until the sun comes up.

I leave you with a weeping dragon who still hasn’t found an angle or excuse to wheedle himself a Visa to Leprechonia despite his best (second rate) efforts. OH! That reminds me! I almost forgot!

What you see there Impish is an honest to God leviathan, sort of a non mythical current day version of a Megalodon shark  that lived approximately 23 to 2.6 million years ago, during the Cenozoic Era. That is just one of four that call the waters off Leprechonia home.

I’ve arranged an…accommodation with them, no tour boats, no swim with the big fish, certain Eco friendly concessions and in turn they protect my island group from water borne threats. Threats like say, dragons trying to swim their way in.

Kenny Chesney – When The Sun Goes Down