Good morning my dear friends. And it is morning here. yesterday. I know that sounds weird, but you are reading this on Saturday and I am writing this on Friday morning so it is yesterday for you.

I finally have a day off today…well…shouldn’t call it a day off since it’s already filled with stuff that needs to be done, which is why I’m up at my regular time in the morning to work on DL so I get to spend some quality time with you before I’m trying to get everything done that needs to be done that hasn’t been done for the last 2 or 3 weeks because of the constant work on the air show.

I just reread that last paragraph and as bad as it is grammatically, it still makes sense, so I’m leaving it.

Hey! I can hear you guys out there! “So Impish, when have you ever cared about grammar, before?”

Well…never, I’m more of a Jersey-speak, flow from the fingers, if it sounds good … OH NEVER MIND! It’s too darn early in the morning for this crap! Just…

Yeah, some aren’t going to get that one.

I’ve learned that 99% of the time when something isn’t working in your house, one of your kids did it. 

One of the most wonderfully written responses I’ve ever seen.

That statement is pretty poorly written.  Aircrew is showing the ground crew that they’ve got their hands clear of all the switches, sticks, and controls that could kill them.  In all honesty, they ought to be sticking their feet out of the cockpit as well (except someone has to  keep pressure on the breaks once the chocks are pulled).  Those flight control surfaces hurt when they move when they’re not supposed to!

Indiana, Gary Law

Within four hours of eating garlic, a person may not enter a movie house, theater, or ride a public streetcar.

A quiz programme contestant had to identify famous slogans.

After several correct responses, he was asked, “Which company originated the phrase ‘ Good to the last drop ‘?” 

The contestant thought for a moment and replied, ” Otis Elevator? “

That is too funny!

In my FBI (Faith Bible Institute) Class last night, the instructor was kind of talking about that. How, throughout the day to just kind of keep in touch with God. Whispered words of prayer, acknowledging that it is Him who is in control, things like that.

THAT IS THE DIFFERENCE!  I’m so very sorry, but it’s the truth. I’m not an Islamophobe, I’m a realist. Islam has, as one of it’s primary tenants, to kill or enslave everyone who is not Islamic.  This is what they are trying to do to every country they are moving into, including the United States.  That is not a “religion of peace”. The sooner EVERYONE gets it in their heads the safer we’ll all be.

Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocre minds. 

-Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

Louisiana Law

It is illegal to shoot lasers at police officers.

I really have to wonder what required that sign being put up…

Oh Please!

A young man was having some money problems, and needed $200 to get his car fixed and roadworthy again. 

But had run out of people to borrow from. So, he calls his parents via the operator, and reverses the charge and says to his father. 

“I need to borrow two hundred dollars ,” he says.

At the other end, his father says, “Sorry, I can’t hear you, son, I think there may be a bad line.” 

The boy shouts, “Two hundred. I need two hundred dollars!” 

“Sorry, I still can’t hear you clearly,” says his father. 

The operator cuts in, “Sorry to butt in, But I can hear him perfectly clearly.” 

The father says, “Good. YOU send him the money!”

Only for those people who talk out their ass all day.

A blonde took her dog to the vet for its annual check-up. 

“Your dog is overweight,” the vet said. “You should cut back on his food a little and make sure he gets some exercise. Try playing fetch with him.” 

“That’s impossible,” the blonde replied. “I can’t play fetch with my dog.” 

“Why not?” asked the puzzled vet. 

“Because,” the blonde said, “he can’t throw.”

And that’s it my friends. I hope you have an enjoyable Saturday. Holly and I are talking about going to the movie later today, but I don’t think there’s anything really interesting playing. Maybe the new Spiderman movie… We’ll see. 

So, until next time!