Well, it’s Saturday morning and I’m waiting for the Izzy Dragon to awaken so we can pack up the car and go to Goodwill to drop off a bunch of stuff that she has. The problem is, I’m sure she’ll bring home as much as she drops off. But that’s fine. It keeps her off the streets at night.

So, while I wait for her to drag herself out of bed, I’ll spend some time with you guys, and get this episode going. See if I can’t find something to get fired up about and just plain have fun! So …

I don’t know what’s so funny. That’s how they sell them in my neighborhood.

Wait! 4 what?

Yup…he was drunk.

And then trust Him to do it!

Joe sends us this …

I heard about this a number of years ago. 

It was happening often in the deep south. 

When a bad storm hit and power was out for an extended time, home owners (Trailers and homes) would run a gas generator to power the critical items. 

During the night, thieves would steal the generators. The home owners never knew because they heard the continuous sound of the motor. What the thieves had done was put an old gas lawn mower next to the house, run it for the engine sound and take the expensive generator. 

Homeowners kept hearing the engine running and didn’t know their generator was gone. 

Quiet smoking only?

And that’s a BIG difference!!!

You people paying attention out there! DO NOT (wink! nudge!) plant bamboo near Data Centers! Don’t (Wink!) Do it! (Nudge, Nudge!)

Joe sent us a special message about his holiday experiences…

   This is July 8th  and they are still shooting off fireworks!

They almost caught our Christmas decorations on fire.

And then we got a follow up message from him…

Thank you all!

Our blowup turkey was not harmed!

    …Joe

Thank goodness for small miracles, Joe.

Almost 77 years ago and we’re still going through the same crap with these guys!

Maine Law

Shotguns are required to be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack. 

OH! I gotta get me one of these!

Same thing happened at my brother Ken’s house.

I did!

Interesting concept.

The heavy clinking of pint glasses and the low hum of the jukebox did little to drown out Arthur’s brooding. He stared into his amber whiskey, his face a mask of pure betrayal, before turning to his buddy, Dave, on the stool next to him.

“I’m telling you, Dave, that wife of mine is a pathological liar,” Arthur growled, slamming his glass down just hard enough to spill a few drops. “I’m sick of the deceit.”

Dave took a slow sip of his beer, adjusting to his role as the tonight’s designated bartender-therapist. “Whoa, calm down, man. That’s a heavy accusation. What makes you so sure she’s lying to you?”

“Because she didn’t come home last night,” Arthur said, leaning in close, his eyes narrowed. “Not a text, not a call, nothing. Just rolled through the front door this morning like nothing happened. So I cornered her in the kitchen. I demanded to know exactly where she’d been all night.”

“And?” Dave asked, leaning in too. “What did she say?”

“She looked me straight in the eye, cool as ice, and said she had spent the entire night over at her sister Shirley’s house because they were ‘watching movies and talking.’ Can you believe the nerve?”

Dave blinked, looking a bit confused. “I mean… it sounds plausible, Arthur. Shirley only lives a few miles away. What’s so terrible about that? How does that make her a liar?”

Arthur let out a bitter, cynical laugh and shook his head.

“Because she’s a liar, Dave… I spent the night with her sister Shirley.”

It’s very true. My dear, ALL of your problems would be solved if you had a dragon.

Exhilaration is that feeling you get just after a great idea hits you, and just before you realize what’s wrong with it. 

Rex Harrison (1908-1990)

As EVERYONE should!

I was asking my friend who has children, “What if I have a baby and I dedicate my life to it and it grows up to hate me. And it blames everything wrong with its life on me.” 

And she said, “What do you mean, ‘If?’

Oh! Back from Goodwill, by the way. Went to Goodwill, got gas, took Izzy to lunch, and stopped at the store. Came home, put everything away, took out the puppies and after putting everything away, I’m back with you guys and the first thing that Izzy said was, “Can I take a nap?”

LOL!

Sure kiddo, take a nap. Gotta love it.

On with the show.

Maryland, Baltimore

It is illegal  to take a lion to the movies.

Okay, a couple of things here.

1 – I would hope this would be illegal EVERYWHERE!

2 – What in the world happened that made them have to codify this!

My 9 year old daughter was going through the stuff with me from our attic, she pulled out some records that we had from years ago. 

She exclaimed ” This is the biggest CD I’ve ever seen Dad!” 

And that’s it for this one my friends. Gonna finish this one up and immediately jump into the next one since I’m just sitting here listening to podcasts. So … until the next one.