Good Morning Campers,
While you’re reading this, I am fighting through an Air Show at our base. I say fighting, because it has been over a year in the planning and making of this Air Show, so I know it’s going to be crazy.
It has been a crazy year for me, and hopefully, God will grant me some peace so I can just do what needs to be done and I can rest. By this time next week, I’ll know whether that is going to happen or not. LOL!
Hopefully, you will get some pictures from me from the Air Show. Maybe I can post some to Dragon Laffs from the Word Press phone ap. We’ll see.
Let me get caught up…we’ve gotten a total of eleven donations so far:
Scott H. Daniel W. Henry S. Ginny K. Leah H. Joseph P. Donald G. Danny M. Steven H. Blast Specialties, Inc. Kara T. Phillip S.
Thank you all for working so hard to keep this project going. Your generosity is very appreciated. This may be the last week that I ask for donations. I know the bill is coming due soon, so please hurry. If you can throw us a couple of bucks, that would be awesome. Just click the donate button on the upper right.
Now, let’s get on with the laughter.
That was bloody awful!!
Took my kids to the beach and tried to release them like I’ve seen sea turtle parents do, but they just stood there and asked me for snacks.
Okay, I like this next one….it scares me….but I like it.
Don’t just assume that when I’m angry I’m on my period. Otherwise, when you’re sleeping I’ll just “assume” you’re dead and bury you in my backyard.
Oh Gawd, another groaner!!!
The reason a lot of Women can’t find her KNIGHT IN SHINNING ARMOR is because she won’t let go of that idiot wrapped in aluminum foil.
Best Smart Ass Answers
SMART ASS ANSWER #6
It was mealtime during an airline flight.
‘Would you like dinner?’ , the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.
‘What are my choices?’ John asked.
‘Yes or no,’ she replied
SMART ASS ANSWER #5
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat, she said, ‘Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.’
SMART ASS ANSWER #4
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, ‘ Do these turkeys get any bigger?’
The stock boy replied, ‘No ma’am, they’re dead…’
SMART ASS ANSWER #3
The police officer got out of his car as the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. ‘I’ve been waiting for you all day,’ the officer said.
The kid replied, ‘Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.’
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
SMART ASS ANSWER #2
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway and noticed a sign that read: Low Bridge Ahead. Before he knows it, the bridge is right in front of him and his truck gets wedged under it. Cars are backed up for miles.
Finally a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, ‘Got stuck, huh?’
The truck driver says, ‘No, I was delivering this bridge and I ran out of gas.’
SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow’s final exam. ‘Now class, I won’t tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that’s it, no other excuses whatsoever!’
A smart-ass student in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, ‘What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?’
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student, shook her head and sweetly said, ‘Well, I guess you’d have to write the exam with your other hand.’
IMPOSSIBILITIES IN THE WORLD
1) You can’t count your hair.
2) You can’t wash your eyes with soap.
3) You can’t breathe when your tongue is out.
Put your tongue back in your mouth, sure you can still breathe, you fool.
Every guy thinks that every girls’ dream is to find the perfect guy…
Every girls’ dream is to eat without getting fat!
I hate it when people act all intellectual and talk about Mozart while they’ve never even seen one of his paintings…
Men don’t have babies because God saw the way they handle a cold and knew the species would never survive.
I don’t snore…
I dream I’m a motorcycle.
I just ran 5 miles and what a workout!!
I didn’t think that Ice Cream Truck would EVER stop!
Those are probably my favorite of all the cartoons….the motivational posters. I haven’t received many from you guys in a long time, so keep your eyes open for some good ones and send them my way.
Gotta love the irony of a generation raised on making prank phone calls only to be terrorized by daily robo-calls now.
In a span of 11 years, 115 people died in a weightlifting accident at the gym.
In the same 11 years, only 1 person died eating a donut.
Make Good Choices.
A guy wants a divorce. He tells the judge, “I just can’t take it anymore. Every night she’s out until way after midnight, just going from bar to bar.”
Judge asks, “What’s she doing?”
The guy answers, “Looking for me.”
Police came round last night and told me my dogs were chasing people on bikes.
Bullshit. My dogs don’t even have bikes.
After 10 years, a wife started to think their child looks kinda strange so she did a DNA test and found out the child is not theirs. So, she tells her husband what she found out and the husband replies, “You don’t remember, do you? When we were leaving the hospital, the baby pooped and you told me to go and change him. So, I went inside, got a clean one, and left the dirty one there.
The wife fainted.
You ever pay bills so much that when you have money left over you think…what the fuck did I forget to pay?!?!
If a cookie falls on the floor and you pick it up…that’s a squat, right?
I drank so much vodka last night, I woke up with a Russian accent.
Do you ever just flex your foot wrong and it cramps and you’re just like, “This is it, this is how it ends.”
The best murder weapon would be a Tupperware lid, because nobody would ever be able to find it.
Dr. Oz says rubbing coffee grounds on your naked body prevents cellulite.
Apparently, you can’t do it in Starbucks…
And now the cops are here…
All I ask is for a chance to prove that winning the lottery won’t make me a bad person!
I hate it when I mean to buy seedless grapes but instead I accidentally get … well … you know … Oreos.
Of course it’s Trump’s fault…it couldn’t possibly have anything to do with your choices.
Democrats today are saying no one, even the President, is above the law. So, my question is: How come illegals are?
They should put more money in the ATM’s. I’m getting really irritated. This is the tenth ATM I’ve been to in the last week that’s had “Insufficient Funds”.
That’s it for this week. It’s now all Air Show for me…
Don’t forget to throw us a couple of bucks, if you can.
Thanks to all of you who have sent such loving comments. I’m gonna miss him, too.