Dragon Laffs #1494


Header1494campersThere is, of course, a story that goes along with the header you see above.
So much has happened since we last talked, so  pull up a log and have a seat and we’ll get to things.
As many of you know, my son’s been laid up.  I’ve already given you guys the site to donate to, if you wish, but if you want the full story, which his wife very kindly put out, you can go here: https://gogetfunding.com/family-in-need-21/#.V22KQ_Oyf6I.facebook
Anyway, as a side note to that, Mrs. Dragon and I had the Grand-dragonettes for most of last week. 
So, a week ago last Sunday, we took them to my Brother-in-Law’s house and low and behold he had built a pirate ship in his backyard, and that is it pictured in the header.  Now, if there has ever been any boy who didn’t, at one time or another in his life, want to be a pirate then I’ve never met him.  They had a blast playing with the other younger kids in Mrs. Dragon’s family and it was a nice day.  20160530_153005
And of course, they had to go swimming again, lol.
We did some arts & crafts, played in the backyard, went swimming, helped Grandpa clean out the shed and the garage (a little bit), went swimming, went to their dad’s house (my son’s house) and mowed the lawn for him, and we went swimming a little.  Overall, it was a really good week.

Now, Let’s go ahead and get started and in a little while, I’ll give you an update on the Independence Day Picnic, Party and Orgy that is currently (as I’m writing this) taking place at the DL&LL Mountain Resort and Play Area.
Let's Laugh2076

So, this first one has been around many, many times. But, as a Vet and currently working for the United States Air Force (as a civilian) I can’t express to you the times that I have seen Veterans not only not given their due, but outright disparaged.  It makes me sick. 

But this isn’t one of those stories, although there is a mention of that type of behavior.  This is more a feel good story and it comes from our buddy and fellow camper K2As I came out of the supermarket that sunny day, pushing my cart of groceries towards my car, I saw an old man with the hood of his car up and a lady sitting inside the car, with the door open.  The old man was looking at the engine.

I put my groceries away in my car, and continued to watch the old gentleman from about twenty five feet away.

I saw a young man in his early twenties with a grocery bag in his arm walking towards the old man. The old gentleman saw him coming too, and took a few steps towards him.

I saw the old gentleman point to his open hood and say something. The young man put his grocery bag into what looked like a brand new Cadillac Escalade. He then turned back to the old man. I heard him yell at the old gentleman saying: “You shouldn’t even be allowed to drive a car at your age.” And then with a wave of his hand, he got in his car and peeled rubber out of the parking lot.

I saw the old gentleman pull out his handkerchief, and mop his brow as he went back to his car and again looked at the engine. He then went to his wife and spoke with her; he appeared to tell her it would be okay.

I had seen enough, and I approached the old man.

He saw me coming and stood straight, and as I got near him I said, ‘Looks like you’re having a problem.’

He smiled sheepishly, and quietly nodded his head.

I looked under the hood myself, and knew that whatever the problem was, it was beyond me.

Looking around, I saw a gas station up the road, and I told the old man that I would be right back. I drove to the station and I went inside. I saw three attendants working on cars. I approached one of them, and related the problem the old man had with his car. I offered to pay them if they could follow me back down and help him.

The old man had pushed the heavy car under the shade of a tree and appeared to be comforting his wife. When he saw us he straightened up and thanked me for my help. As the mechanics diagnosed the problem (overheated engine), I spoke with the old gentleman.

When I shook hands with him earlier, he had noticed my Marine Corps ring and had commented about it, telling me that he had been a Marine too. I nodded and asked the usual question, ‘What outfit did you serve with?’

He had mentioned that he served with the first Marine Division at Tarawa, Saipan, Iwo Jima and Guadalcanal …

He had hit all the big ones and retired from the Corps after the war was over. As we talked we heard the car engine come on and saw the mechanics lower the hood. They came over to us as the old man reached for his wallet, but was stopped by me. I told him I would just put the bill on my AAA card.

He still reached for the wallet and handed me a card that I assumed had his name and address on it and I stuck it in my pocket. We shook hands all around again, and I said my goodbye’s to his wife.

I then told the two mechanics that I would follow them back up to the station. Once at the station, I told them that they had interrupted their own jobs to come along with me and help the old man. I said I wanted to pay for the help, but they refused to charge me. 

One of them pulled out a card from his pocket, looking exactly like the card the old man had given to me. Both of the men told me then that they were Marine Corps Reserves. Once again we shook hands all around and as I was leaving, one of them told me I should look at the card the old man had given to me. I said I would and drove off.

For some reason I had gone about two blocks, when I pulled over and took the card out of my pocket and looked at it for a long, long time. The name of the old gentleman was on the card in golden leaf and under his name was written:  ‘Congressional Medal of Honor Society.’

I sat there motionless, looking at the card and reading it over and over. I looked up from the card and smiled to no one but myself and marveled that on this day, four Marines had all come together because one of us needed help. He was an old man all right, but it felt good to have stood next to greatness and courage, and an honor to have been in his presence.


Remember, OLD men like him gave their FREEDOM for America .  Thanks to those who served and still serve, and to all of those who supported them, and who continue to support them.

Anyone else who served was moved by that story as much as I.  And in all honesty, it doesn’t matter if it is true or not.  It just gives hope that the America we all know and miss might still be hiding out there amongst it’s people.

2077
So, of course with the grandkids here this whole week, you know I got both photos and videos of some of the things we did.  In this first video, the oldest grandchild goes swimming.  Let’s watch.

Okay, so that was NOT the grandchild.  That was the neighbor.  I’m really sorry, I’ll keep looking for the right video.

2078
Dragon Pixstorytime_nc_MO10So, bedtime this week has been lots of fun with the grandkids.  We’ve spent some time telling stories and having a really good nighttime routine.

2079

This is a really interesting video about a guy who is going to take a hive of honey bees out of an old tire and get them to move to a new hive.

And this one is a demo of one of the new DL&LL assistant robots that Boston Dynamics has developed for us.  If you were to ever get behind the scenes into the actual working area of our mountain, you will begin to see more and more of these:


And to give you an idea of what’s coming next for DL&LL Enterprises in our R&D department:

 

2080
Fantasy Pixf2010062701Believe it or not, our dear Ginny (shown above in her “dancing slave girl” costume) teaches aerobic dancing in our mountain resort.  She’s everybody’s favorite when they bring out that big brass pole for her to use.  No, I’m not talking about Braninski Brownie, I’m talking about a real pole made of brass.  Sheesh you guys!

So, ….ahem….the party is going along GREAT!  Oh, sorry, did I spill any on you?  (hic!) Sorry ‘bout dat.  Anywho, some one schnapped this picture of old greenie and me, thought I’d (hic!) share it wit youse guys.
d2016070401

I’m not sure how I got his pipe.  I’m probably in troub (hic!) le for dat.

 

2081
Okay, I can’t help it, I’m finding a bunch of good videos this time around.  In this one, a son saves his father’s life.

And what distracted the dad?  Well, according to the announcers, he was watching a “pretty girl.”

2082
Okay, I’ve gotten enough political cartoons to sink an election, so let’s jump into our next section called:Politics4a
4aaI know that was in bad taste (ouch! Sorry about that) but you have to admit that it is funny!

4bThat’s an excellent point….

4cOkay, that one was especially a bald faced lie! (I know, I’m sorry, I’ll quit.  I promise) but again, it sure is funny.

4dIf only it were true…

4eRepent!  For the end is near!

4mWe told you at the beginning, when we first started this e-zine stuff fifteen years ago, that we would deal in truth.  And this picture, is about as truthful as it gets.

4nThis is so true, that I just threw up a little bit in my mouth.

4o
Okay, one more for luck.  Maybe this last one will be more funny than true.
4pWell, shit! Apparently not.

2083
stupid
Ah, another one of my new favorite sections.
5e
5f
5g
5h
5iYup, that pretty much describes everyone of them.

2084That could very easily be either one of my grandsons

2085

2086

Yup, I can easily see this happening.  When I was stationed in New Mexico, cable TV was just coming out with boxes to scramble the signal.  Until that time, the company had to actually come out to the house and disconnect the wire.  Well, when I moved in to the house I was living in, it already had cable turned on.  No box needed.  So a few years later when the boxes came out I finally had to break down and go to the cable company for the box.  They wanted to charge me for the years that I had been receiving it for free!  I told them it wasn’t my fault that they never turned it off.  It was on when I got there.  How did I know it wasn’t part of my rent or something.  They were highly incensed with me. But, like I told them.  At least they were going to be getting money from me now.

2087

I’m not really sure burying your head in the ground is the way to go with this one.

2088

2089

motivational

Levitation

Liberalism

liberals

Liberals2

Library Nazis

Library

The proud owner of a magnificent 1956 Chevrolet convertible, wrote to say he had restored the car to perfection over the last few years, and sent this……

On a very warm summer afternoon he decided to take his car to town.  It needed gas, as the gauge was practically on empty, but he wanted ice cream, so he headed first to his favorite ice cream shop.

He had trouble finding a parking space and had to park the car down a side street.   He noticed a group of young guys standing around smoking cigarettes and eyeing his car rather covetously.  He was a bit uneasy leaving it there, but people often take interest in such an old and well-preserved car, so he went off to enjoy his ice cream.

The line at the ice cream shop was long and it took him quite a while to return to his car.  When he did, his worst fears were realized his car was gone.

He called the police and reported the theft and then went back and bought a quart of pistachio ice cream.  About ten minutes later the police called him to say they had found the car abandoned near a gas station a few miles out of town.

It was unharmed and he was relieved.  It seems just before he called, the police had received a call from a young woman who was an employee at a self-service gas station..  She told them that three young men had driven in with this beautiful old convertible.  One of them came to the window and prepaid for 20 dollars-worth of gas.

Then all three of them walked around the car, looking at it carefully, and then just walked away without filling the tank..

The question is, why would anybody steal a car, pay for gas that they never pumped, and then abandon the car later and walk away?

 Scroll down —

 Answer: They couldn’t find where to put the gas!
001a

Thanks to Ginny

for this great story!

 

last word

Shhh!!!!  Gawd, don’t whisper so loud.  Today is Tuesday, and I realized that I have to finish this off for tomorrow and I’m really majorly hung over from last night.  Well, you remember that recipe that his greenness put in his Independence Day Issue?
Shhhhh!!! Oh geez!  That was a rhetorical question!  Just assume that all questions from now on are rhetorical and be as quiet as you possibly can.
Just so you know, if ANY of you happen to drop anything loud, like a coffee cup or something, you better throw yourself overtop of it before it can make any noise or in my pain-filled reaction you and the people sitting closest to you will probably end up burnt to a crisp.
Right, so after getting completely sloshed in my little blue dragon persona that you all know so well from the party, I changed to my human form and went to a buddies house for a barbeque. 
While there we tried out Lethal’s PeachComber recipe

Capture000001Anyway, I mixed up a pitcher of them and gave out shot glasses to everyone (about 30 people) and every single one of them, to the last person, LOVED it.  Needless to say, we used up all the rum that we had available and were going to run to the store to get more when we all kind of realized that NONE of us were sober enough to drive!  Those dastardly little Peachcombers had snuck up on us and we didn’t even realize it.
So, I’m going to have to say that although this drink was a HUGE success, it MUST come with a warning label.  Something like:
WARNING: This drink will sneak up behind you and beat the shit out of you while you’re not looking!
Or maybe:
WARNING: This drink will make you feel like a kid again, until you wake up and try to brush something off your shoulder and you realize it’s the floor.
Yeah, something like that.
Sneaky little bastardly peachcombers.
Until Saturday my friends.
Cheers Impish

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3 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1494

  1. Ginny says:

    I was just about to ask you about the Beachcombers…it looks yummy. Lethal kind of filled me in regarding your “condition”. and 30 people, Damn that must have been some sleep over…..
    You made me laugh out loud with the video of the bear in somebody’s pool. Outstanding job on the issue….and when did you snap the picture of me on the pole?

  2. lethalleprechaun says:

    I’m still waiting to hear the pre crash landing incident by report!

    The FAA is ready to declare you a flying mythology menace and tear up your pilots licence.
    To make matters worse they’ll cancel our private field certification so not only won’t you be able to land here anymore neither will I nor any of our guests famous or godly!

    I want to see that report not later than Saturday’s issue OR ELSE!

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