DL & LL Digital Media Ltd. Thanksgiving Holiday Issue 2014


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As you get off the elevator you are urged not to dally by several iLethals who seem to be indicating some sort of ‘event’ is near to starting. As you rush in to find your seats you see the Patron area is already filled and if you didn’t know better you’d swear book was being made on what ever this soon to be occurring event was.

Lethal seems to be splitting his time between monitoring the betting book and listening to reports apparently being sent to his left ear where some sort of headset can be seem dangling. He gestures emphatically at a sign on the wall when you ask what is going on. Apparently Impish has served notice that he’ll not tolerate being excluded from Thanksgiving prep and overseeing the kitchen this year. Apparently because he caught wind of the rumor that Lethal’s much ballyhooed  about Turducken was going to be the center piece of the meal and Impish has been shut out of (as he puts it) ‘his consultation input and/or tasting for approval approval of this important decision’. The note goes on to say that he will make his inspection at such time as Lethal is too busy to possibly interfere with it.

Suddenly Lethal calls out  “He’s loading something in the freight elevator now. Last bets before it starts!”

Several people scurry to make wagers and the big screen over the podium descends and comes to life showing some portion of Dl & LL Corporate HQ that you’ve never seen before. Judging from the walls and lack of decor this is part of a service area. The screen flickers and splits into two views to also show another hallway with what appears to be a freight elevator at the far end.  A line of text appears at the bottom of the screen ‘Target arriving in 15..14.13…12″ and the count down continues to zero.

At that point thee doors open and you can see Impish pushing what appears to be a large wooden frame covered with over lapping mirrors wearing what appears to be a very large rubber tent with a hole cut for his head. He’s sporting what appears to be two pair of possibly ski goggles one over each eye and what at best guess appears to be some sort of nasal filtration made from 2 barrel carb air cleaner kits.

Once the mirrored shield is out of the elevator Impish slowly extends and canes his neck around it on all sides carefully inspecting the floor walls and ceiling before slowly advancing down the hallway. Once he makes the corner he lays flat on the floor and peers around it carefully suddenly his obviously amplified muttering can be heard.

“See I knew I needed to be taste testing! Those Turduckens smell fantastic! (Something in audible due to Impish’s belly rumbling drowning it out) Rotten Leprechaun claims they are too expensive and too rich for tastes test, and after I only ask for 6 of the biggest one too! Well  I’ll show him! I’ve been prepping for this since I got lasered last year then Tazered in the ass by them pop down turrets that little green Napoleon installed!

Huh ! Wonder what that rubber floor mat is all about, that’s new. Looks like some sort of conveyor belt, maybe it helps get my food upstairs faster. Seems like an awful lot of new  Wi-Fi antennas too, but reception down here was always bad. Maybe we need a bigger kitchen, going to have to talk to Lethal about that, them look like round oven pans that should be in the kitchen hang on the wall to either side of the door. Well, the sooner I get this done the sooner I munch Turducken to the sounds of Lethal screams of  frustration and not being the boss of me!

Impish slowly and carefully maneuvers the mirrors shield around the corner and slides behind it. When his head pops back up it appears he’s attached a larger square mirror to this horns to protect as much of his face as he can. You can see him take several deep breaths before he bellows out:

THIS IS IMPISH DRAGON, YOUR BOSS DESPITE WHAT LETHAL TELLS YOU! I’M COMING IN FOR A THANKSGIVING MEAL INSPECTION AND QUALITY CONTROL SAMPLING AND I DON’T WANT TO HERE ANYTHING ABOUT IT! FURTHER MORE THE FIRST ONE OF YOU THAT TRIES TO WARNING LETHAL GETS FIRED- AS IN FLAME ROASTED RIGHT WHERE YOU STAND! NOW, WE DOING THIS MY WAY OR DO I HAVE TO GET MEAN?

Yippes!

A host of sharp cooking implements, large cutlery and several impressively sized cleavers come flying down the hall slamming into Impish’s shield breaking a few mirrors before embedding themselves in the wood behind them.

OK YOU MADE YOUR TOKEN STAND AND I’LL BE SURE TO TELL LETHAL IT WAS PROPERLY FRIGHTENING. NOW, IF THAT’S THE BEST YOU’VE GOT I’M COMING…

HOLY JEEZE!

Several five foot long one inch square iron bars come flying down the hall and pierce the shield completely. One coming to a stop about two inches from Impish left eye as he hides behind the shield. Lethal identified theses as several of the skewers from the custom rotisserie in the kitchen.

HEY NOW! IT’S ALL FUN AND GAMES UNTIL SOMEONE LOSES AN EYE AND IF THAT SOMEONE IS ME I’M GOING TO BE REALLY PISSED! (muttering under his breath…. Can’t believe I left Lethal con me into hiring SEALs, Rangers and Recon Marines to run the kitchen! Should have seen this coming!)

Just before a large heavy sounding metal door slams down across the kitchen opening bearing the spray painted legend “Impish Proof. Approach at your own humiliation” you hear faintly what sounds like a Bronx cheer and the words “Eh go make another insurance commercial Barney will ya? We’s got no more time ta make you look foolish dinosaur we’re working in here!”

Momentarily Impish’s coloring does nearly resemble that of his hated Dinosaur nemesis. Then he takes several deep breaths and grimly starts pushing his shield before him down the hall. He appears to be growing in confidence until he hits the conveyor belt, which at about the half way point seemingly turns into a tread mill halting his advance.  At he same time you observe his mirrored shield start quivering and a look of severe discomfort appear on Impish’s face. This look increases until he get a look of panic on his face and turns around dashes down the hall yelling

CLEAR THE MENS ROOM!

In the conference room there are groans of disappointment as apparent Impish bettors make ready to discard or tear up their tickets. Lethal cautions against this saying:

“The terms o’ the wager were that it wasn’t over until Impish gets back on the elevator and leaves the kitchens level or calls to be rescued. Tis nae either occurred yet.”

In response to a query about what had just happened Lethal replies

 Tis some non lethal crowd control tech I’ve agreed to test out for DARPA. Tis called a Long Range Acoustic Device and I paired with with a very low frequency sound generator. Low frequencies disrupt and interfere with a body’s internal processes for as long as they are exposed the the sounds in humans. Apparently in Dragons the effect is centered …somewhat lower and of a more…pressing shall we call it nature. Puns intended folks.” (Several giggles and groans can be heard before Lethal’s hand goes suddenly to his ear) “OK he’s coming out time for round 2!”

Impish goes over to a wall mounted intercom consults a list of numbers and dials one.

“Yeah maintenance? Impish here. Men’s room on the kitchen’s level needs immediate attention, it’s a disaster in there. I don’t know, maybe a septic back up or something. Possibly a kid with M-80s but its bad. Yeah. Bring Hazmat suits and air freshener…lots of air freshener. wadda ya mean what am I doing on the kitchen level?! This is MY mountain! I’ll go where I want!” <Slams intercom back on wall> (muttering) Sheesh! Lethal even has the mop jockeys narking on me now! I’m going to need a bigger bribe Cmas gift budget!

Impish goes back up the hallway and is startled to find his much the worst for having been shaken nearly apart shield back to where he originally started from. Also a new sign hangs from the door barring off the kitchen which reads:

“We warned you! You’re not much of a fart smeller are you…wait we take that back that one you left in the hall was pretty nasty. Learn from the experience and prove you’re not just another dumb dinosaur Barney!”

Impish turns Barney purple, picks up what is left of his shield and charges at the kitchen door. Predictably half down the hall the conveyor switches on and it’s the whole tread mill scenario all over again. Another bellow and Impish switches to short flying hops the hall way being to narrow and ceiling to low for him to completely unfurl his wings and fly. The conveyor immediately speed up to match him and he’s back in the middle of the hall. Suddenly all those “Wi-Fi antennas” Impish commented on gain lit LEDs and vacillate several times before locking on Impish. The moment they do the hallway lights flicker and dim. You notice occasional small sparks from anything metal on Impish and that his rubber poncho seems to be getting very droopy. There seems to be wisps of steam or smoke seeping out from under More than a few of Impish’s scales too.

Suddenly even though the homemade eye protection you can see Impish’s eye grow wide with panic. He drops the shield and makes good use of the conveyor’s traveling the a rear ward direction the exit the area tearing hunks of the now nearly melted poncho off him as he goes bellowing:

“HOT! I’m so HOT! Gang Way! OW! OW! OW! Clear the Corridor! OW! Dragon Emergency!”

He pauses his head long dash for the elevator just long enough to grab a large CO2 fire extinguisher from a fire fighting station and as the elevator doors close the whoosh of its activation can be heard and a small cloud of CO2 escapes the elevator.

Lethal looks at those who bet on Impish and smiles broadly as he says

“NOW you can cue those groans folks! Your bank accounts will be debited for your losses immediately. Those who bet and won can expect to be credited immediately. Excuse me one moment please.”

He pulls out a phone from his vest and dials an in house extension.

Yes ‘tis Lethal. Everything ok down there? No serious damage? Good. No, he’ll be no more trouble today. Yes he’s left the level you can open back up now. Oops got to go that would be him calling now.

Hello? Impish! What a surprise! What? You’re where? Okay but….ah I see. The first? Low frequency sound through very powerful and focusable sound projectors. No, honestly I had no idea, in most folks it just takes their breath away and makes them uneasy. Finally passed that chocolate covered porcupine I slipped you at Halloween for eating all the chocolate? Good! See there was an upside after all. Yes I’ll bet he was a wee pissed off at being your intestinal bottle brush.

The other thing? It’s called an Active Denial System, damned effective no? Think of it as a bunch of tiny microware ovens all focused at you. Oh PLEASE you big baby! You’re fine its nothing more than a sunburn would be! You’re just upset because you failed…again. OK! OK! Tell you what I’ll send Diamen and Ginny down to the pool with two 5 gallon buckets of Aloe Vera and some pastry bags to squirt it under your scales how’s that? What? NO! I will most certainly NOT tell them they HAVE to skinny dip with you! If you keep THAT up I’ll give ALL of your turkeys to feed the homeless! Begorrah! Stop bloody blubbering already the ladies are on their way! <hangs up>

Ladies if you would be so kind? Thank you. You’ll find the Aloe Vera and the applicators waiting for you at the Veterinary Infirmary on level 7. Impish is in the grotto pool on level 22 in full pout. Let’s not mention this little piece of pari-mutuel cinema to him shall we? Thank you ladies!

Ladies and Gentleman, that concludes the entertainment for today I hope you enjoyed it. Please enjoy the issue while I go see about assuaging my friends now rather depressed over failing to breach my defenses 3 years running feelings.

 

Opening Logo 6

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Yeah- Good luck getting any of THAT pie away from HIM!

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And for those Thanksgiving feast crazed dragons special few who drive you to drink…

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Fun Facts about the First Thanksgiving

  • The Plymouth Pilgrims were the first to celebrate the Thanksgiving.
  • The Pilgrims sailed across the Atlantic Ocean to reach North America.
  • They sailed on the ship, which was known by the name of ‘Mayflower’.
  • They celebrated the first Thanksgiving Day at Plymouth, Massachusetts.
  • The Wampanoag Indians were the people who taught the Pilgrims how to cultivate the land.
  • The Pilgrim leader, Governor William Bradford, had organized the first Thanksgiving feast in 1621. He invited the neighboring Wampanoag Indians to the feast.
  • The first Thanksgiving celebration lasted three days.
  • Mashed potatoes, pumpkin pies, popcorn, milk, corn on the cob, and cranberries were not foods present on the first Thanksgiving’s feast table.
  • Lobster, rabbit, chicken, fish, squashes, beans, chestnuts, hickory nuts, onions, leeks, dried fruits, maple syrup and honey, radishes, cabbage, carrots, eggs, and goat cheese are thought to have made up the first Thanksgiving feast.

    The pilgrims didn’t use forks; they ate with spoons, knives, and their fingers.

     

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    We Gather Together – Celtic Women

     

    The Top 5 Songs About Thanksgiving

    1. All About That Baste
    2. I Stuff Myself
    3. Stairway to Heavin’
    4. Who Let Their Pants Out?

     

    And the Number One Song About Thanksgiving…

    Do They Know It’s NOT F%^&ing Christmas?

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    Now we see everything that’s going wrong
    With the world and those who lead it
    We just feel like we don’t have the means
    To rise above and beat it

    If we had the power,
    To bring our neighbors home from war…
    They would have never missed a Thanksgiving
    No more ribbons on their door

    So we keep waiting
    Waiting on the world to change

    John Mayer “Waiting On The World To Change”
    (paraphrased by Lethal)

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    Tomorrow is Thanksgiving but its also the official start of the annual madness that is the Cmas shopping season. Here are a few holiday cost cutting tips and tricks.

    The Top 17 Cost-Cutting Holiday Seasons Ideas

    17. Fill a fruitcake tin with mud and let it dry. Superglue the lid on. No one has opened one in 50 years, so you’re good.

    16. Tell kids Christmas is January 25th; score everything 75% off.

    15. Let’s just say that most Toys for Tots bins aren’t monitored by security cameras.

    14. Two words: dingleball ornaments

    13. Save on your shopping budget with a quick walk around the neighborhood, right after the UPS and FedEx trucks go by.

    12. C’mon, your neighbor’s never going to miss that pine tree from his front yard.

    11. “Sorry, kids, Santa’s in jail again this year.”

    10. THE Christmas present for all your non-Christian friends: Say you’ll pray for them.

    9. Re-purpose inexpensive birthday cards. Simply pencil in “, Jesus!”

    8. Stand outside the grocery store asking for donations of milk, cream, sugar, eggs and nutmeg. Voila! Beg Nog.

    7. Undocumented carolers.

    6. Contract with North Korea to hang political prisoners from your tree.

    5. Invite your psychiatrist and have a combined family gathering/group therapy session.

    4. That’s not snow-frozen dog shit —- they’re Outdoor Lincoln Logs(R)!

    3. Avoid the expense and headaches of fighting for the lowest priced gifts at the mall by just staying at home and punching yourself in the face instead.

    2. Last year: Christmas shopping. This year: Christmas shoplifting.

    And the Number 1 Cost-Cutting Holiday Seasons Idea…

    1. Put a great, big bow in the middle of the driveway overnight. In the morning, when you lead your S.O. out to see their big surprise, you scream, “Oh my God! Somebody stole it!”

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    Thanksgiving Facts throughout History

  • Benjamin Franklin wanted the turkey to be the national bird of the United States.
  • Sarah Josepha Hale, an American magazine editor, persuaded Abraham Lincoln to declare Thanksgiving a national holiday. She is also the author of the popular nursery rhyme “Mary Had a Little Lamb”
  • Abraham Lincoln issued a ‘Thanksgiving Proclamation’ on third October 1863 and officially set aside the last Thursday of November as the national day for Thanksgiving.
  • The annual Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade tradition began in the 1920’s.
  • In 1939, President Roosevelt proclaimed that Thanksgiving would take place on November 23rd, not November 30th, as a way to spur economic growth and extend the Christmas shopping season.
  • Congress to passed a law on December 26, 1941, ensuring that all Americans would celebrate a unified Thanksgiving on the fourth Thursday of November every year.
  • Since 1947, the National Turkey Federation has presented a live turkey and two dressed turkeys to the President. The President does not eat the live turkey. He “pardons” it and allows it to live out its days on a historical farm.

     

    The West Wing – Pardon a Turkey

     

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    Well I guess THAT explains all the complaints from the Butterball Hot Line about Impish!

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    Fun Facts about Thanksgiving Today

  • In the US, about 280 million turkeys are sold for the Thanksgiving celebrations.
  • Each year, the average American eats somewhere between 16 – 18 pounds of turkey.
  • Californians are the largest consumers of turkey in the United States.
  • Thanksgiving Day is celebrated on the fourth Thursday in November in the United States.
  • Although, Thanksgiving is widely considered an American holiday, it is also celebrated on the second Monday in October in Canada.
  • Black Friday is the Friday after Thanksgiving in the United States, where it is the beginning of the traditional Christmas shopping season.

     

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    BAD PARROT

    A young man received a parrot as a gift.

    It had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

    Every word out of the  bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and  tried to change the bird’s attitude by consistently saying only polite  words,
    playing soft music and anything else he could think of to ‘clean  up’ the bird’s vocabulary.

    Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot.

    The parrot yelled back.

    John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even more rude.

    John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer.

    For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.

    Then there was total quiet.

    Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

    Fearing that he’d hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer.

    The parrot calmly stepped out onto John’s outstretched arms and said  “I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions.

    I’m sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.”

    John was stunned at the change in the bird’s attitude.

    As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird spoke up, very softly, “May I ask what the turkey did?”

  • President Bartlet and the Butterball Hotline

     

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    You CAN use fresh or canned Dragon in any of the following recipes EXCEPT for the cookies. I have the feeling that locally its going to be very cheap the next few weeks if a certain dragon doesn’t stop his annual harassment of the cooking staff and assault on the forbidden territory of the Corporate kitchens.

    Slow-Cooker Bean and Barley Soup

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    Ingredients

    1 cup dried multi-bean mix or Great Northern beans, picked over and rinsed
    1/2 cup pearl barley
    3 cloves garlic, smashed
    2 medium carrots, roughly chopped
    2 ribs celery, roughly chopped
    1/2 medium onion, roughly chopped
    1 bay leaf
    Kosher salt
    2 teaspoons dried Italian herb blend
    Freshly ground black pepper
    1/2 ounce dried porcini mushrooms, crumbled if large, optional
    One 14-ounce can whole tomatoes, with juice
    3 cups cleaned baby spinach leaves (about 3 ounces)
    1/4 cup freshly grated Parmesan Balsamic vinegar, for drizzling
    Extra-virgin olive oil, for drizzling
     

    Directions

    Put 6 cups water, the beans, barley, garlic, carrots, celery, onions, bay leaf, 11/2 tablespoons salt, herb blend, some pepper and porcini mushrooms (if using) in a slow cooker. Squeeze the tomatoes through your hands over the pot to break them down, and add with their juices. Cover and cook on high until the beans are quite tender and the soup is thick, about 8 hours.

    Add the spinach and cheese, and stir until the spinach wilts, about 5 minutes. Remove the bay leaf and season with salt and pepper.

    Ladle the soup into warmed bowls and drizzle each serving with vinegar and olive oil.

    I add sausage (chicken or brown & serve cut up), diced ham or cooked crumbed bacon to mine. I know of one cook who added cut up peppered beef jerky to his. Prebrowned off Beef shanks would also work well. If you don’t have the dried porcini mushrooms don’t worry you can substitute Baby Bellas or a cut up Portobello (remove the gills) or skip them entirely. If skipping I suggest substituting a can of Beef Broth for 1.5 cups of the water or adding a little powdered low sodium bullion (beef or vegetable)

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    Beef and Butternut Squash Stew

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    Ingredients

    3 tablespoon olive oil
    1 onion, peeled and chopped
    2 cloves garlic, chopped
    1 tablespoon minced fresh rosemary
    1 tablespoon chopped fresh thyme
    2 pounds stew beef, cut into 2-inch cubes
    1/2 teaspoon salt, plus more to taste
    1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper, plus more to taste
    2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
    1 cup Marsala wine
    1 pound butternut squash, trimmed and cut into 2-inch cubes
    1/4 cup chopped sun-dried tomatoes
    3 to 4 cups beef broth
    2 tablespoons fresh chopped flat-leaf parsley
    Crusty bread, for serving

    Directions

    In a large soup pot heat 3 tablespoons of olive oil over medium heat. Add the onions, garlic, rosemary, and thyme and sauté until the onions are tender, about 2 minutes. Toss the beef cubes in salt and pepper and flour. Turn up the heat to med-high and add the beef to the pot. Cook until the beef is browned and golden around the edges, about 5 minutes. Add the Marsala wine. Using a wooden spoon, gently stir up all the brown bits off the bottom of the pan. Add the butternut squash and sun-dried tomatoes and stir to combine. Add enough beef broth to just cover the beef and squash. Bring the stew to a boil over high heat, then reduce the heat to low and simmer, covered, for 1 hour. Season the stew with additional salt and pepper to taste. Sprinkle with the chopped parsley. Serve with crusty bread alongside

    Don’t have Sundried Tomatoes in your pantry? Me either. Just use some canned lo sodium diced or stewed ones instead. OR try dried cranberries (aka Craisins)

    No Marsala wine? No problem! Use beer, red wine or stock (Beef or Vegetable). Last time I made it I had just about 1 serving of French Onion Soup left over and used that to great effect. I understand you can get if concentrated in a can now.

    I usually add mushroom (Crimini/Baby Bellas or Portabellas depending what’s in the veggie drawer) and frozen Italian Green Beans for about the last 20 minutes of cooking.

    Don’t like peeling and chopping butternut squash? You can usually find in frozen in bags though you might have a bit of a hard time with that around Thanksgiving. Don’t like butternut squash? Use sweet potatoes instead!

    Coffee Spice Cookies

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    • Prep Time: 15 minutes
    • Cook Time: 8 minutes
    • Yield: 4 dozen

    Ingredients

    • 2 teaspoons Instant Coffee Crystals
    • 1 teaspoon hot water
    • 1/2 cup Butter Flavor All-Vegetable Shortening
    • 3/4 cup firmly packed brown sugar
    • 1 large egg
    • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
    • 1 1/2 cups All Purpose Flour
    • 1 teaspoon baking powder
    • 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
    • 1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
    • 1/4 teaspoon salt
    • 1/3 cup chocolate decorator bits

    Directions

    1. DISSOLVE instant coffee in hot water. Beat shortening, brown sugar, egg, vanilla and coffee mixture in large bowl with electric mixer until light and fluffy. Mix in flour, baking powder, cinnamon, nutmeg and salt.
    2. DIVIDE dough into two equal parts. Shape each half into a roll 7-inches long x 1 1/2-inches in diameter. Roll in chocolate decorator bits, pressing lightly. Wrap tightly. Refrigerate at least 2 hours.
    3. HEAT oven to 375ºF. Cut rolls into 1/4-inch slices. Place slices 1-inch apart on ungreased baking sheet.
    4. BAKE 6 to 8 minutes or until set. Cool on rack.

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    Chicken and Cornmeal Dumplings

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    Ingredients

    • 2 medium carrots, thinly sliced
    • 1 stalk celery, thinly sliced
    • 1/3 cup fresh or frozen corn kernels
    • 1/2 of a medium onion, thinly sliced
    • 2 cloves garlic, minced
    • 1 teaspoon snipped fresh rosemary or 1/2 teaspoon dried rosemary, crushed
    • 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
    • 2 chicken thighs, skinned
    • 1 cup reduced-sodium chicken broth
    • 1/2 cup fat-free milk
    • 1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
    • 1 recipe Cornmeal Dumplings (see recipe below)
    • Coarsely ground black pepper (optional)

    Directions

    1. In a 1 1/2- or 2-quart slow cooker, combine carrots, celery, corn, onion, garlic, rosemary, and 1/4 teaspoon pepper. Top with chicken. Pour broth over mixture in cooker.
    2. Cover and cook on low-heat setting for 7 to 8 hours or on high-heat setting for 3 1/2 to 4 hours. If no heat setting is available, cook for 5 to 5 1/2 hours.
    3. If using low-heat setting, turn to high-heat setting (or if no heat setting is available, continue cooking). Transfer chicken to a cutting board; cool slightly. When cool enough to handle, cut chicken off bones; discard bones. Chop chicken; return to mixture in cooker. In a small bowl, combine milk and flour until smooth. Stir into mixture in cooker.
    4. Using two spoons, drop Cornmeal Dumplings dough into four mounds on top of hot chicken mixture. Cover and cook for 20 to 25 minutes more or until a toothpick inserted into a dumpling comes out clean. (Do not lift cover during cooking.) If desired, sprinkle each serving with coarse pepper.

    Cornmeal Dumplings

    Ingredients

    • 1/4 cup flour
    • 1/4 cup cornmeal
    • 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
    • Dash salt
    • 1 egg white
    • 1 tablespoon fat-free milk
    • 1 tablespoon canola oil

    Directions

    1. In a medium bowl stir together flour, cornmeal, baking powder, and salt. In a small bowl combine egg white, milk, and oil. Add egg mixture to flour mixture; stir just until moistened.

    Nutrition Facts Per Serving:

    Servings Per Recipe: 2
    PER SERVING: 369 cal., 10 g total fat (1 g sat. fat), 55 mg chol., 582 mg sodium, 47 g carb. (5 g fiber, 9 g sugars), 24 g pro.

     

    Diabetic Exchanges

    Vegetables (d.e): 1; Starch (d.e): 2.5; Lean Meat (d.e): 2; Fat (d.e): 1

    Split Pea and Potato Soup

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    Tender chunks of potato make thick pea soup even heartier. This meal is guaranteed to warm kids up on cold winter days. If not serving soup immediately, let it cool completely, and then store it in airtight containers. It will keep in the refrigerator for up to five days and in the freezer for up to one month.

    • yield: Makes 3 3/4 Quarts

    Ingredients

    • 3 tablespoons unsalted butter
    • 1 large onion, finely chopped
    • 4 medium carrots (1 pound), cut into 1/2-inch rounds
    • 2 stalks celery, cut crosswise into 1/4-inch pieces
    • 1 pound green split peas, rinsed and picked through
    • 2 quarts chicken stock
    • 1 bay leaf
    • Salt and freshly ground pepper
    • 2 pounds Yukon gold potatoes, cut into 1/2-inch pieces

    Directions

    1. Melt butter in a 6-quart pot over medium heat. Add onion, carrots, and celery; cook, stirring frequently, until vegetables begin to soften, about 5 minutes. Stir in split peas, chicken stock, and bay leaf; season with salt and pepper. Bring mixture to a boil. Reduce heat to low; cover, and simmer, stirring occasionally, 30 minutes.

    2. Add potatoes, and simmer until they are tender, about 30 minutes. Discard bay leaf, and season with salt and pepper. Serve immediately.

    Meghan Trainor – “All About That Bass” Parody “All About That Baste” (Thanksgiving Song)

     

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    Fun Turkey Facts

  • The average weight of a turkey purchased at Thanksgiving is 15 pounds.
  • The heaviest turkey ever raised was 86 pounds, about the size of a large dog.
  • A 15 pound turkey usually has about 70 percent white meat and 30 percent dark meat.
  • The five most popular ways to serve leftover turkey is as a sandwich, in stew, chili or soup, casseroles and as a burger.
  • Turkey has more protein than chicken or beef.
  • Turkeys will have 3,500 feathers at maturity.
  • Male turkeys gobble. Hens do not. They make a clucking noise.
  • Commercially raised turkeys cannot fly.
  • Turkeys have heart attacks. The United States Air Force was doing test runs and breaking the sound barrier. Nearby turkeys dropped dead with heart attacks.
  • A large group of turkeys is called a flock.
  • Turkeys have poor night vision.
  • It takes 75-80 pounds of feed to raise a 30 pound tom turkey.
  • A 16-week-old turkey is called a fryer. A five to seven month old turkey is called a young roaster.

     

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    That’s Impish’s Holiday Dinner….

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    That’s a s deployed soldier’s holiday meal, IF he’s lucky enough to even get a hot one.

     

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    A  little preview of next years hottest selling Christmas present for guys

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    I TRIED to warn him we are what we eat! Just LOOK now! He’s turning into a Dragturkhamon and it’s not even Thanksgiving yet!!

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    Alright Lads & Lasses, originally the plan was for Impish himself to do the Last Word today. However in as much as he is currently sulking in the pool refusing to come out until he tastes Turducken indisposed due to a minor skin irritation received during his assault on the off limits kitchens, he’s sent this Bob Wydock fellow (who seems somehow strangely familiar to me from someplace) to carry on in his place. Mr. Wydock the floor is yours sir.

      Lethal gave me this wonderful opportunity to include a Last Word with his
    Thanksgiving Day issue.
      So, to start out with the things that I’m grateful for, one of the first has
    to be the good friend that I have in Lethal Leprechaun.  As most of you
    know, we have never met in RL or real life, although we’ve been pals in our
    mythological world for centuries.  He’s a great buddy, always has my back,
    even as he’s directing bus drivers to my current location. [never actually proven]
      Not surprisingly to some of you, we spend a great deal of time in our
    mythical world.  Spending whole afternoons in our world in text and emails.
      A special few of you have been included in portions of this arena, but
    nobody has been privy to all of it.  I know it sounds a bit crazy, in truth
    of fact; it’s a whole bus full of crazy at times.  But, it satisfies an
    artistic void that would otherwise be filled with book writing, game
    creation or RPG playing. [What?! We could have been playing RPGs? I’m talking to you less from now on Impish!]
      Anyway, that’s first on my list.
      Second would be my family.  My RL family, that is.  My wonderful wife who is
    indeed my other half.  I’m not sure where I would be at this point in my
    life if it wasn’t for her, but there are really good odds that above ground
    and breathing would not have been one of the favorites.  My three fantastic
    children, only one of which who is still at home.  I have six beautiful
    grandchildren who I don’t see near enough of; two brothers who are still
    amongst the living and one who has gone on to a better place.  Nieces and
    nephews from my brothers and My dad, whom you all know as Papa Dragon Most
    Senior and my sister who still dwells in the land of Jersey who I really
    don’t see or hear from at all;  Still all loved and still all thankful for.
    Because all of them, from the youngest to the oldest have helped shaped me
    into the man that I am today.
      And that doesn’t even begin to count my extended family courtesy of my
    darling Mrs. Dragon.  Let’s see, at last count there are 9 brothers and
    sisters, 25 nieces and nephews, 17 great nieces and nephews, plus her dad
    and numerous aunts and uncles.  Yup, family is a true blessing of mine and
    for that I am truly thankful.
      Then there is my other family.  That would be you guys.  (Take a bow, all of
    you.) You would not believe how thankful I am for each and every one of you.
    You get to accompany me in the world I walk through, the world both Lethal
    and I walk through and you get a glimpse at the world I alone walk through.
    You are all very special and dear, an extended family of the best kind and I
    am thankful and love you all.
      I am grateful to our military, currently serving and veterans, who have
    voluntarily agreed to put their asses on the line between the evil darkness
    out there and the friends and family we all have back here.  It’s a very
    small and dedicated group we belong to and I am proud to consider myself a
    member.
      I am grateful for the founding fathers who saw, in their infinite wisdom the
    path that we must take to have the freedoms and happiness that we enjoy so
    much in our country.  Even though the current times seem to have us
    wandering off that path, I know, with the grace of God, we will get passed
    this point and have our country continue to prosper and survive.
      And lastly, but certainly not least, I am grateful for my Heavenly Father
    and the sacrifice His Son has made in my name and the promise of everlasting
    life in His Grace.

    image

  • About lethalleprechaun

    I believe in being the kind of man who, when my feet touch the floor in the morn', causes the Devil to say "BUGGER ME! HIMSELF IS UP!" ======== I'm a White Married Heterosexual who fervently believes in the war(s) we are fighting, the Second Amendment which I plan on defending with my last breath and my last round of ammunition as well as Arizona's stringent law on Immigration and the need for the border wall. I'm a right of center Con-centrist with Tea Party & Republican sympathies who drives an SUV. I am a Life Time Member of the NRA, a Charter Member of the Patriots' Border Alliance and North American Hunters Association. If there is a season for it and I can shoot one I'll eat it and proudly wear its fur. I believe PETA exists solely to be a forum for Gays, Vegetarians, Hollywood snobbery to stupid to get into politics and Soybean Growers. The ACLU stopped protecting our civil liberties sometime after the 1960s and now serves its own bigoted headline grabbing agenda much in the same way as the Southern Poverty Law Center. I am ecstatic that WE the PEOPLE finally got mad enough to rise up and take back the Government from WE the ENTITLED and reverently wish the Liberals would just get over the loss and quit whining/protesting all the time. After all they're just reaping what they've sown. I am Pro-choice both when it comes to the issue of abortion AND school prayer. I believe in a government for the people, by the people which represents and does the people's will. Therefore I an Pro States rights and mandatory term limits but against special interest group campaign contributions and soft money. I think that sports teams who allow their players to sit or take a knee during the National Anthem should be boycotted until the message is received that this is not acceptable behavior for role models for children. I believe Congressional salaries should be voted on bi-annually by the people they represent and not by themselves. I think Congress should be subject to every law they pass on the populace including any regarding Social Security or Healthcare. Speaking of the Healthcare bill (or con job as I see it) I hope Trump will overturn it and set things back to normal. I oppose the building of an Mosque or ANY Islamic center at or within a 10 mile radius of Ground Zero in New York. I will fight those in favor of this until hell freezes over and then I will continue to fight it hand to hand on the ice. Further I think the ban on immigrants from certain nations known to harbor and promote terrorism is a justified measure, at least until we can come up with better methods of vetting and tracking those non citizens we allow in the country. We did not inflict this measure on them those who refuse to point out, denounce or fight radical religious terrorism brought this upon themselves.
    This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

    9 Responses to DL & LL Digital Media Ltd. Thanksgiving Holiday Issue 2014

    1. kris says:

      Happy Thanksgiving Lethal & Impish. One of the things I’ve been grateful for is this blog. You make me laugh & you challenge me to think outside my narrow box. Thank you for that & thank you even more for never forgetting – and reminding us as well – our servicemen & women. Never change.

    2. Ginny says:

      From the beginning to the very end, Lethal made us laugh and think about our servicemen/women being away from their families on Thanksgiving. Freedom comes at a cost, theirs is keeping us safe with out family. Wishing you all a very Happy Thanksgiving….gobble till you wobble!

    3. maggie culligan says:

      a most excellent post ,,, may you and all your family and friends have a wonderful Thanksgiving and a safe one.

    4. JR in Virginia says:

      Hating to burst your Pilgrim bubble, but the first Thanksgiving was celebrated in Virginia at Berkley’s Hundred in 1619. The Pilgrims, by the way, were planning to come to Virginia, but their hired captain was so inept that he got lost and landed them in what became Massachusetts. But the victors get to write the history, and the Yankess won the Recent Unpleasantness.

      • lethalleprechaun says:

        Allow me to quote from the movie “The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance” in response to you JR in Virginia-
        “When the legend becomes fact, print the legend.”

        Oh and btw if we’re dealing in facts, you neglected to mention that in addition to ‘winning the Recent Unpleasantness’
        we Yankees saved you’re asses in both WWI & WWII to say nothing of feeding your snooty British butts for most of WWII as well.

        God bugger the Queen and her Adulterous son!

        • JR in Virginia says:

          Hey, I’m not British. I come from a long line of Virginians (first one of my ancestors arrived in 1620); we have a long memory and can carry a grudge for a long time. Half my family hasn’t forgiven the Yankess and the other half haven’t forgiven the British. But I do like your attitude–sorta matches mine, ’cause I dont like Washingtom any more than you do.

        • lethalleprechaun says:

          Well as a Yankee sir, if you want your grey behind kicked again continue to find fault with something for which you do not pay and therefore have no right to find fault with. I shall be happy to oblige you with saber, pistol, long gun, cannon or loaded skunks.

          And if early Virgina was all that and a bag of crisps why did the Roanoke settlers choose to abandon it like a bad habit?

          Now go pop THAT bubble

        • JR in Virginia says:

          Actually, Roanoke Isalnd is in North Carolina, a state which has often been described as a valley of humility between two mountains of conceit. I have no quarrel with you, sir. My quarrels these days are much like yours, mostly involving the obamanation in the White House.

        • JR in Virginia says:

          And, BTW, I did contribute to the blog.

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