Leprechaun Laughs # 266 for Wednesday October 1st 2014


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DL & LL Electronic Media Enterprises regrets the switchology error which prevented todays issue from posting on time. We now return you to the regularly scheduled issue.

As you walk in Lethal seems a bit anxious and hyper. There are 4 books, numerous steno pads, a Lap Top and tablet all on their table beside the podium and all seem to be in use- simultaneously. As you enter you see him glace at his phone and mutter something under his breath you don’t quite catch except for the words schedule and time. He carefully books marks all his places before dashing to the podium to address you.

OK-Folks-if-you-could-please-get-it, sit-it-and-shut-it-I’d-like-to-get-this- show-on-the-road-fast-as-possible-and-speeding-tickets-be-damned. 

I lost a whole day this weekend and half a day for my birthday so I’m behind and Professors don’t want to hear excuses about you having a life and a job outside of class.

First I’d like to thank all those who sent me birthday wishes and kind words about the blog with a special nod to the instigator of the entire affair Impish Dragon- you’ll get yours sucker! If you haven’t seen them or my thoughts on what my birthday means to me you should head over the the actual blog [https://dragonlaffs.com/2014/09/23/happy-birthday-lethal-leprechaun/] and read all 17 comments which you can find by clicking the comments link at the end of Impish’s Snitch posting Special Announcement.

Moving right along as you know Molly and I are planning to move to a new residence here in Houston once our lease is up at the end of November. We spent Saturday looking at several of the properties we had narrowed our choices down to as well as the areas they were located in. We found one we like very much and are currently in the application process. I’m announcing this because it sort of ties into two subjects.

1.) Come mid November until probably mid December there will likely be a period of no Leprechaun Laughs. I’m moving and resetting up a household and a business in an area that’s not familiar to us while continuing to go to school and all as Finals for the term will be looming. Something has to give and in the grand scheme of priorities sadly this is basically at the bottom of the totem pole.

2.) Fees deposits and such we must pay even before we take possession of the apartment are in excess of $1000. This doesn’t take into account the movers cost or anything else. What this means is that there is absolutely NO WAY that I can foot 1/2 the expenses for this blog. I’ve already informed Impish that if we can’t raise the funds required to keep this up and running then I’m going to bow out. It doesn’t seem fair for him to foot the entire bill alone so I’ve suggested we retire on a high note if it comes to that as his life is as ridiculously complicated as mine if not more so.

DON’T GET THE WRONG IDEA – I’M NOT MAKING THREATS HERE.

What I am doing is what I always have done giving you the straight truth. Consider this a heads up of possible things to come that Impish and I are in a far better position to foresee that all of you. as Impish said all it takes is a single dollar from each subscriber. We come out generally 100+ times a year not counting the holiday/special issues so if you do the math that’s at or under a penny an issue. Pretty damned fine return and value for a $1!

OH-CRAP! WILL-YOU –LOOK-AT-THE-TIME! I-GOT-TO-RUN-SORRY-IF-THE-ISSUE-IS=A-LITTLE-SHORTER-THAN-USUAL!

Opening Logo 6

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I thought I’d share a couple of the more notable cards I got this year.

Some friends of Molly’s and mine sent me this one.

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My sister sent me this next one-

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Inside it reads “Brother’s Teach Us That!”

Finally I got this one from Molly-

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Isn’t she a darlin’ ?! Here’s the inside, such a lovely sentiment!

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A real keeper my Molly is!

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This one wasn’t signed and had no return address

Notre Dame

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Sounds like a lot of the conversations I have with Impish!

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Important Notice

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Top 10 Reasons I’m Not a Democrat

By George, I think she’s got it — check out this hilarious video of a recovering liberal, now conservative, stating her Top Ten Reasons why she’s no longer a Democrat. One thing is for certain, the younger generation in America is starting to realize that hopey changey thing ain’t working for them and their future. I guarantee you’ll bust a laugh with this one. Hat tip to @ellysa_maye and her exceptional use of social media to make her point.

 

John Wayne on liberals

PAY CLOSE ATTENTION to what he says about Liberals starting at 00;57 until about 01:20 in. Remember this was back in 1975, the majority of us are just realizing the truth of what he is saying now.

 

“I’m quite sure that the concept of a Government-run reservation… seems to be what the socialists are working for now — to have everyone cared for from cradle to grave…. But you can’t whine and bellyache ’cause somebody else got a break and you didn’t, like those Indians are. We’ll all be on a reservation soon if the socialists keep subsidizing groups like them with our tax money.”- John Wayne

“Hell yes, I’m a liberal. I listen to both sides before I make up my mind. Doesn’t that make you a liberal? Not in today’s terms, it doesn’t. These days, you have to be a fucking left-wing radical to be a liberal. Politically, though … I’ve mellowed.” – John Wayne, 1973

Nowadays Duke listening and thinking for yourself makes you a Centrist. Speaking as a fellow Centrist we miss you and would have been damned glad to count you in our midst and have supported you for President!

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Notre Dame 2

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Keep chuckling Impish you chucklehead! This is what is happing to the littlest Dragonette right in from of your eyes and you’re powerless to stop it. Better hope none of them boys play D&D and know how to bride a moat, slay a Dragon and carry off the Fair Maiden or you’re in serious trouble!

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 spicerack5

Quick Pork Goulash

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Ingredients

1 1/4 pounds pork tenderloin, trimmed and cut into 1-inch pieces
1/4 teaspoon dried thyme
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
4 teaspoons olive oil
2 carrots, diced
1 rib celery, diced
1 onion, thinly sliced1 red or green bell pepper, diced
3 tablespoons sweet paprika
2 tablespoons tomato paste
1 teaspoon crushed caraway seeds
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 cup low-sodium beef broth
1 teaspoon red wine vinegar
2 cups whole-wheat egg noodles
Chopped chives, for garnish

Directions

Toss the pork pieces with the thyme, 1/4 teaspoon salt and 1/4 teaspoon pepper. Heat 1/2 of the oil in a medium Dutch oven over medium-high heat. Add the pork pieces in a single layer and cook until lightly browned, about 5 minutes. Transfer with a slotted spoon to a bowl.
Heat the remaining oil in the same pot and add the carrots, celery, onions and bell pepper and cook, stirring, until softened, 7 to 10 minutes. Stir in the paprika, tomato paste, caraway and garlic until fragrant and the tomato paste has darkened slightly, 1 to 2 minutes. Stir in the broth and 1 1/2 cups water and bring to a simmer. Cook until the vegetables are tender and the broth has thickened, about 45 minutes.
Meanwhile, cook the noodles according to package directions and keep warm.
Add the pork back to the stew and cook, stirring, until the pork is cooked through and hot. Stir in the vinegar and season with salt and pepper. Toss with the hot egg noodles and garnish with chives.

 

Weak Knees Alert

Cream Cheese-Filled Ginger-Cherry Pumpkin Bread

Some days you just need to embrace a kitchen sink approach to cooking. This quick bread is just such a case. With ginger, cherries, cream cheese – you almost can’t call this pumpkin bread. What you can call it is damned good.

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CREAM CHEESE-FILLED GINGER-CHERRY PUMPKIN BREAD

2 cups white-whole-wheat flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground dry ginger
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1 1/3 cups dark brown sugar, packed
1/3 cup canola or vegetable oil
15-ounce can pumpkin puree
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon grated fresh ginger
1/2 cup toasted pumpkin seeds
1 cup dried cherries
12 ounces cream cheese, room temperature
2 tablespoons granulated sugar Zest of 2 oranges

For the streusel

1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1/4 cup packed dark brown sugar
1/4 cup rolled oats
2 tablespoons unsalted butter, room temperature

Directions

Heat oven to 350 degrees. Coat a large (9- to 10-inch) loaf pan with baking spray.

In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, baking soda, cinnamon, dry ginger and salt.

In a large bowl, whisk together the brown sugar, oil, pumpkin, 1 egg and the fresh ginger. Add dry ingredients to the wet, then mix until just combined. Stir in pumpkin seeds and cherries, then spread half of the batter evenly over the bottom of the prepared loaf pan. Set aside.

In a medium bowl, mix together the remaining egg, the cream cheese, the granulated sugar and the orange zest. Spread half of the mixture evenly over the batter in the pan. Spread half of the remaining batter over it, then top that with the remaining cream cheese filling. Finish with a final layer of batter. Set aside.

To make the streusel, in a medium bowl use your fingers to rub together the flour, brown sugar, oats and butter. Sprinkle evenly over the loaf.

Bake for about 1 hour, or until a toothpick inserted at the center comes out clean. Cool for 30 minutes, then remove from the pan and cool completely before slicing. Makes 16 servings.

  • Tossing the cherries with a bit of the whole wheat flour will ensure they remain suspended in place in the batter and don’t all sink to the bottom like in the picture
  • If you don’t have or don’t like dried cherries try Craisins which are dried cranberries in this.

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Or as Diabetics all them- Suicide by Sugar Induced Coma!

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Apparently Impish has been secretly scouring the world looking for just the right gift to give me for my Birthday. When I first heard this I was kind of dubious because:

a.) I’m his accountant and I know how much he doesn’t have in his pockets-

Inside Impish's Pockets

b.) With everything on his plate currently I have no idea where he’d find the time to spend traveling and looking.

So I discounted the report. Then the same source sent me this photo of allegedly of Impish navigation the canals of Venice while searching for my present:

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Even I’m forced to admit the resemblance is striking but I still don’t think it’s Impish

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Last Saturday Impish announced that the Historical Memorial Marker I had installed in the Picnic Field (to commemorate Impish’s voluntary admission that I was right about the entire pizza thing) had been vandalized. Initially I was quite upset over this both over the security lax that allowed this and by the comment left on it.

Then it occurred to me that the comment might be being misinterpreted. The more I thought about it the surer I became, the comment isn’t aimed at me. It is, in point of fact, aimed at Impish. What the vandal was trying to convey in limited space and with very limited time was that I am so often right about the things I tell Impish to straight him out that it was only a matter of time before he screwed up and publically admitted I was right and therefore (as usual) he was wrong!

Once I realized this I ceased being irked by it, canceled the order to have the graffiti power washed off the marker and asked that several protective layers of clear acrylic be carefully applied over it to protect and preserve it.

Guardians of Galaxy

About lethalleprechaun

I believe in being the kind of man who, when my feet touch the floor in the morn', causes the Devil to say "BUGGER ME! HIMSELF IS UP!" ======== I'm a White Married Heterosexual who fervently believes in the war(s) we are fighting, the Second Amendment which I plan on defending with my last breath and my last round of ammunition as well as Arizona's stringent law on Immigration and the need for the border wall. I'm a right of center Con-centrist with Tea Party & Republican sympathies who drives an SUV. I am a Life Time Member of the NRA, a Charter Member of the Patriots' Border Alliance and North American Hunters Association. If there is a season for it and I can shoot one I'll eat it and proudly wear its fur. I believe PETA exists solely to be a forum for Gays, Vegetarians, Hollywood snobbery to stupid to get into politics and Soybean Growers. The ACLU stopped protecting our civil liberties sometime after the 1960s and now serves its own bigoted headline grabbing agenda much in the same way as the Southern Poverty Law Center. I am ecstatic that WE the PEOPLE finally got mad enough to rise up and take back the Government from WE the ENTITLED and reverently wish the Liberals would just get over the loss and quit whining/protesting all the time. After all they're just reaping what they've sown. I am Pro-choice both when it comes to the issue of abortion AND school prayer. I believe in a government for the people, by the people which represents and does the people's will. Therefore I an Pro States rights and mandatory term limits but against special interest group campaign contributions and soft money. I think that sports teams who allow their players to sit or take a knee during the National Anthem should be boycotted until the message is received that this is not acceptable behavior for role models for children. I believe Congressional salaries should be voted on bi-annually by the people they represent and not by themselves. I think Congress should be subject to every law they pass on the populace including any regarding Social Security or Healthcare. Speaking of the Healthcare bill (or con job as I see it) I hope Trump will overturn it and set things back to normal. I oppose the building of an Mosque or ANY Islamic center at or within a 10 mile radius of Ground Zero in New York. I will fight those in favor of this until hell freezes over and then I will continue to fight it hand to hand on the ice. Further I think the ban on immigrants from certain nations known to harbor and promote terrorism is a justified measure, at least until we can come up with better methods of vetting and tracking those non citizens we allow in the country. We did not inflict this measure on them those who refuse to point out, denounce or fight radical religious terrorism brought this upon themselves.
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One Response to Leprechaun Laughs # 266 for Wednesday October 1st 2014

  1. Ginny says:

    I ran to my e-mail inbox, and looked under every stone….and couldn’t find Lethal Leprechaun’s Wednesday’s Dragon Laffs. Then as I panicked, I looked up in the sky and…there it was
    the most beautiful rainbow. So I knew if I could find the end…you would be there performing your Lethal instructions to get the group to settle down.

    I was right, another outstanding issue awaited. The videos well chosen, the jokes handpicked and your sharing of your birthday wishes. You made mention of moving with your Irish lass and possibily giving up doing Dragon Laffs. My heart sank, tears started flowing….NO IT CAN’T BE!

    I’m hoping the 2014 donations for the website keep flowing in….maybe I could help Impish….but think, after you are all settled in your new place, holidays will be over….what will keep you off the streets and out of trouble. So please rethink of throwing your pot of gold into the trash forever, in the world we live you and Impish bring us laughs, chuckles and some serious sh#$ to think about
    and debate.

    Plus, you have to be around for the grand opening of the pool I have ordered from Santa! Also thanks for the potential weak knees warning…..I’m gaining weight just reading your yummy
    dessert recipes.

    Jersey Girl

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