Leprechaun Laughs # 236 for March 12th 2013


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Weather is still very much in flux here, though at least we are making progress towards warm. In the last 3 days we’ll have seen a  day time high of 76 and then a plummet to a rainy barely 60 with several nights well into the 30s.

On the bright side, at least its not as bad as Impish who saw 55 degree temps Tuesday followed by a 23 degree drop and the full Monte of winter precipitation with 25 to 35 mph winds on top of it today. I expect he’ll be taking yet another snow day off while claiming ‘telecommuting’ to DL/LL Enterprises. Telecommuting is actually Impish speak for being in his recliner with a lap top open and his eyes closed.

You guys get started on today’s issue Friday is giving me the sign my next interview for Impish’s replacement on call substitute is waiting for me I’ll catch up in time to relate something interesting that occurred while attempting to put the issue together in my Parting Shot.

Opening Logo 6

Cookie Monster Coffee

Cute but impractical- you lose about 1/3 of the mugs capacity to the cookies & it doesn’t appear to hold nearly enough chocolate chip cookies.

procaffination

Irish Railway

The following is an actual exchange of correspondence between a customer
and the Irish Railway Company – IarnrodEireann.

Gentlemen,
I have been riding your trains daily for the last two years,
and the service on your line seems to be getting worse every day.
I am tired of standing in the aisle all the time on a 14-mile trip.
I think the transportation system is worse than that enjoyed by people 2,000 years ago.

Yours truly,
Patrick Finnegan

 

Dear Mr. Finnegan,
We received your letter with reference to the shortcomings of our service
and believe you are somewhat confused in your history.

The only mode of transportation 2,000 years ago was by foot.

Sincerely,
IarnrodEireann

Gentlemen,
I am in receipt of your letter, and I think you are
the ones who are confused in your history. If you will refer to the
Bible and the Book of David, 9th Chapter,
you will find that Balaam rode to town on his ass.

That…. gentlemen, is something I have not been able to do on your train in the last two years!

Yours truly,
Patrick Finnegan.

 

demon-cat-claims-another

Cat and Dog Diary – A Must Watch

If you’ve had a cat or dog you will likely find this hilarious if you can relate to your own. I could not stop laughing. Hope you enjoy and get your dose of laugh medicine, truly an amazing job and script. https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151949219527499

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I think he’s deluding himself by believing it would take 10 seconds!

In grocery stores soon….Two new Breakfast Cereals from General Mills

    General Mills is partnering with Michelle Obama to promote healthy eating.  Here are the first two products.

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CYber Security Alert

Sneaky Netflix tech support scam could let criminals take over your computer

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f you encounter an error on your computer when trying to sign in to your Netflix account, make sure to double-check before you call the listed help line. This scam may be one of the most elaborate ones seen in a while.

Simply put, this is a phishing scam that’s gone above and beyond to access your personal information. Coupling “tech support” with a phishing scam is a devious ploy, but it can fool a lot of people if you don’t know what you’re looking at.

When you call the “help line,” you will be told that people from outside the country have tried to attack your computer and you will be instructed to download the “Netflix Support Software.”

This software is really remote control program that will allow the hackers to gain access to all of your personal files, including your banking information. The hackers will show you an imitation of the results of scans for attacks and run several programs on your computer.

They will give you a bogus Netflix coupon code for $50 and then try to extract a payment of $389.97 to complete the scam. They will ask you to hold up your credit card and ID to the webcam or send them a picture of your credit information.

Click here to learn more about the scam from Malwarebytes.

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Chunky Salsa Cheesecake

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What You’ll Need

1 cup crushed tortilla chips
1/2 cup butter, softened (1 stick)
2 packages (8 ounces each) cream cheese, softened
1 pint sour cream
2 eggs
8 ounces shredded Cheddar cheese (about 2 cups)
1/2 cup chopped green onion
1 to 2 cloves garlic, minced
1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper
1 jar (16 ounces) Pace® Chunky Salsa

How to Make It

  • 1 Combine the tortilla chips and the butter in a small bowl. Press the mixture into the bottom of a 9-inch springform pan. Place the springform pan in a shallow baking pan.
  • 2 Beat the cream cheese, sour cream and eggs in a medium bowl with an electric mixer on medium speed until the mixture is smooth.  Stir in the cheese, onion, garlic and black pepper. Pour the cheese mixture into the pan.
  • 3 Bake at 350°F. for 30 minutes or until set.  Let the cheesecake cool in the pan on a wire rack for 20 minutes.  Cover the pan and refrigerate for 4 hours or overnight.
  • 4 Remove the cheesecake from the pan.  Top with the salsa and cut into 12 wedges.

Be adventurous! Use flavored tortilla chips (Hint of Lime) or Doritos in the crust. Use a fruit salsa in place of the Pace. Like more zing and zip? Add chopped cilantro or green chilies to the cream cheese mix

Orange and Pineapple Muffins

https://dragonlaffs.files.wordpress.com/2014/03/c5e13-dsc07740.jpg

 

Orange Pineapple Muffins taste of orange, pineapple, and pecans and the baked muffins, while still warm, are brushed with an orange glaze which keeps them wonderfully shiny and moist. These are lovely little gems that are baked in miniature

 

 

Orange Pineapple Muffins

1/2 cup pecans

1 (8-ounce) can crushed pineapple

2 cups flour

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, at room temperature

1/4 cup packed brown sugar

1 egg

3/4 cup milk, plain yogurt or sour cream

1 teaspoon orange extract

1 tablespoon finely grated orange zest

Glaze:

1/4 cup fresh orange juice

Coarse decorator’s or demerara sugar

Heat oven to 350 degrees and place rack in center of oven. Spread pecans in a single layer on a cookie sheet and toast 8 minutes. Allow to cool, then chop into small pieces.

Coat a muffin tin with vegetable oil spray, or fill cups with paper liners. Drain pineapple. Increase oven heat to 375 degrees.

Whisk flour with salt and baking soda. Beat the butter and sugar until light and fluffy (about 3 minutes). Add the egg and beat until thoroughly blended. Scrape down the sides of the bowl and beat in the milk, orange extract and zest. Stir in the flour mixture just until incorporated. Fold in the toasted pecans and drained pineapple.

Fill prepared muffin cups 3/4 full with batter. Bake 20 to 25 minutes, until lightly browned and a toothpick inserted in the center of a muffin comes out clean. Remove to wire rack. While muffins are still hot, brush tops with orange juice and sprinkle with the sugar. Makes 16 muffins.

Source: Linda Cicero for Cook’s Corner

Per muffin: 156 calories (51 percent from fat), 9 g fat, (4.1 g saturated, 3 g monounsaturated), 27.8 mg cholesterol, 2.8 g protein, 9 g carbohydrate, 0.8 g fiber, 177 mg sodium.

 

Orange Pineapple Muffin Cake (Giant Scone)

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Called Orange Pineapple Muffin Cake, this easy, wholesome Pillsbury Bake-off contender from 1990 reminds me more of a scone than a muffin. Although the description claimed that “Whole wheat flour adds texture and wholesomeness to this muffin-like cake,” both Molly and I agree that this pineapple orange muffin cake has the consistency of a scone. More biscuit-like than muffin-like. And with just 200 calories and 6 Weight Watchers PointsPlus, this is a whole lot lighter than your typical coffee shop coffeecake, muffin or scone.

Molly was a little concerned that the batter was too thick, but managed to get it spread out in the pan. The orange pineapple flavor really came through and the orange glaze added just enough sweetness. This delicious recipe full of fruit and flavor is definitely going into our “Make Again” file.

Orange Pineapple Muffin Cake

Prep time 20 mins |  Cook time 25 mins

Total time 45 mins  | Servings 12

A light and tasty coffee cake made with whole wheat flour, crushed pineapple and orange juice that reminds me more of a scone than a muffin Author: Simple Nourished Living Recipe type: Coffee Cake Serves: 12

Ingredients

1-1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup whole wheat flour
1/3 cup packed brown sugar
3 teaspoons baking powder ½ teaspoon baking soda ¼ teaspoon salt
1 can (8-1/4 ounces) crushed pineapple, drained ½ cup orange juice
1/3 cup butter, melted ½ to 1 teaspoon grated orange zest
1 egg, slightly beaten

For the Glaze

½ cup powdered sugar

½ teaspoon grated orange zest
1 to 2 tablespoons orange juice

Instructions

Position an oven rack in the center of the oven and preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Grease the bottom only of a 9-inch round cake pan. In a large bowl, whisk together the all-purpose flour, whole wheat flour, brown sugar, baking powder, baking soda and salt, mixing well. In a medium bowl stir together the drained crushed pineapple, orange juice, melted butter, orange zest and egg until well blended. Add the pineapple mixture to the flour mixture and stir just until the dry ingredients are moistened. (The dough will be very thick.) Spread the dough evenly into the greased pan. Bake at 400 degrees for 22 to 27 minutes or until a light golden brown and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Remove from the oven and cool for 1 minute. Remove from the pan and place on a serving plate. To make the glaze, in a small bowl combine the powdered sugar, orange zest and 1 tablespoon orange juice. Add the additional tablespoon of orange juice a little at a time until desired consistency is achieved. Drizzle the glaze over the warm cake. Serve warm.

Notes Nutritional Estimates Per Serving (1/12th): 200 calories, 6 g fat, 34 g carbs, 0 g fiber, 4 g protein and 6 Weight Watchers PointsPlus

Blueberry Bread and Rice Pudding with Orange Caramel Sauce

Recipe courtesy Food Network Kitchens

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This pudding combo uses both rice and sweet Hawaiian bread (with a blast of blueberries, orange zest and juice) for texture and flavor, with evaporated milk for richness without the fat. You’d never know it was fewer than 300 calories per serving!

Total Time: 1 hr 50 min | Prep: 20 min | Inactive: 30 min
Cook: 1 hr | Yield: 8 servings | Level: Easy

Ingredients

12 ounces sweet Hawaiian bread, cut into 1/2-inch pieces (about 10 cups)
1 1/4 cups fat-free evaporated milk
1 cup 2-percent milk
1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
Large pinch freshly grated nutmeg
Kosher salt
2 large eggs
3/4 cup cooked wild rice
1 cup blueberries
Nonstick cooking spray
1 tablespoon toasted, sliced almonds
1/4 teaspoon finely grated orange zest
1 tablespoon orange juice

Directions

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
Spread the bread cubes out on a baking sheet and bake until toasted and golden, tossing halfway through, about 15 minutes. Let cool.
Whisk together 1 cup of the evaporated milk with the 2-percent milk, 1/2 cup sugar, 1 teaspoon vanilla, nutmeg, a pinch of salt and eggs in a large bowl. Add the cooled bread cubes and wild rice. Toss to combine and set aside until the bread soaks up most of the liquid, about 30 minutes.
Stir the blueberries into the mixture and transfer to a lightly oiled 2-quart baking dish. Top with the almonds and bake until the bread pudding is set and golden, 30 to 40 minutes. Remove and let rest for a few minutes.
Meanwhile, add the remaining 2 tablespoons sugar to a small saucepan. Swirl over medium-low heat until the sugar dissolves and turns amber, about 7 minutes. Stir in the remaining 1/4 cup evaporated milk, 1/2 teaspoon vanilla, orange zest, orange juice and a pinch of salt. Bring to a simmer and cook until slightly thickened, about 2 minutes. Drizzle the caramel sauce over bread pudding. Serve warm or at room temperature.

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News of the Weird

Man grabs ‘Zelda’ sword to battle girlfriend’s ex

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A bizarre story overnight in Katy. One man says he had to grab his replica master sword from ‘The Legend of Zelda’ in a duel with his girlfriend’s estranged husband.

Two men hospitalized after ‘Legend of Zelda’ sword stabbing

Heated argument over woman turns violent after man pulls out replica sword

Author: Gianna Caserta, Reporter, gcaserta@click2houston.com
Lauren Scott, News Associate Producer Published On: Mar 02 2014 07:47:20 AM CST Updated  48 m

http://www.click2houston.com/news/two-men-hospitalized-after-legend-of-zelda-sword-stabbing/-/1735978/24762634/-/14sj6nvz/-/index.html

HOUSTON – We have a bizarre story that happened overnight in Katy. One man says he had to grab a sword in a duel with his girlfriend’s estranged husband.

“Swords and flower pots; it sounds nuts, he is psycho,” said Eugene Thompson, the homeowner’s boyfriend.

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According to deputies with the Harris County Sheriff’s Office, Thompson lives at a home with his girlfriend and said Saturday night they got into an argument. That’s when his girlfriend called her estranged husband, who stopped by the house around 10 p.m.

“It’s late, I get up and look and he is here, and I am like go away, you don’t live here anymore,” said Thompson.

Thompson’s girlfriend let the man inside. Thompson said he ran to the back bedroom and told the man to leave the house, but he refused and started charging at him. That’s when Thompson says he grabbed his replica master sword from ‘The Legend of Zelda.’

“I heard him heading to the bedroom where I was, so I jumped in the closet and I grabbed one of my replica swords, and I pulled it out and stood at the doorway, and he was coming down the hallway at me while I was yelling, ‘Go away, you don’t live here’ and he just walked right into the point of the sword, I don’t know if he thought it was a toy,” said Thompson.

Thompson told Local 2 he managed to get the man out of the house and locked the door. But he said the man wouldn’t give up and broke through the front door and ran back into the house.

Deputies said the two men fought over the sword and in the scuffle, the estranged husband was stabbed — once in the chest and once in the leg. Thompson said the man grabbed a flower pot from outside and smashed it over his head.

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“It dinged me on the head and all of a sudden I had blood pouring down my face,” said Thompson.

Deputies arrived and took the estranged husband to Memorial Hermann Hospital in serious condition.

Thompson was transported to another hospital to get the gash in his head stitched up. Thompson said now he’s trying to figure out what to do.

“I am just trying to figure out what to do from here. I have to find a new place to live,” said Thompson.

Thompson’s girlfriend was not injured in the fight.

Police report no new word on the location of the Ocarina of Time as a result of the incident as all parties clamed to have no knowledge of its location.

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Viral Videos: The Piano Guys’ epic performance of ‘Let It Go’ from ‘Frozen’

It’s no secret that Impish is a fan of the fabulously talented Piano Guys. I know many of you are too, because you love it when I’ve posted their incredible videos! Here is the latest one from the duo: an amazing cover of the mega-hit “Let It Go” from “Frozen.”

Let It Go (Disney’s “Frozen”) Vivaldi’s Winter – ThePianoGuys

 

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I had a Parting Shot for this week 90% completed and saved it just prior to shutting down Saturday. Sunday when I opened this issue to continue working I got a typically Microsoft cryptic message about how there had been a problem with the program shutting down and did I wish to recover the file. When ‘recovered’ the Parting Shot in its entirety was missing including the Banner which by the time I closed down had been saved 3 or 4 times being made several days earlier.

Subsequent scans for Virus, Malware, Hardware & Software issues all turned up negative. Now, I’m not making a claim either way mind you, but I do find it highly interesting that the lost Parting Shot was an update of recent court decisions on the issues of Personal privacy with regard to your electronic devices and your legal expectations.

Instead of attempting to recreate the significant amount of time that went into writing the Parting Shot to that point here is something that will make violating your password protected electronic devices  privacy a little more difficult. At the same time this will graphically demonstrate why I harp so much on using good passwords and all possible characters in creating one

A jazzy password-strength tester

Don’t leave all your data and sensitive information vulnerable with a weak password. There’s too much at stake!

Test the strength of your passwords at How Secure Is My Password? Just enter your password and the site will tell you how long it would take to crack it.

The site will tell you if you’ve picked a common password (such as “password” or “abc123″), along with a few tips on how to make it stronger, such as adding a number or symbol.

The site doesn’t store any information or require a login, so you don’t worry about compromising your security. If you want to be extra certain not to give your password away, just enter a password with a similar length and number of symbols.

https://howsecureismypassword.net/

Here’s an example of how this site can help you- I made one simple change in my test password, without significantly altering the password. The net effect of the change made the password 1 character longer and caused it to include several symbols and/or special characters. The result was my password went from being crackable in 3 days, to it requiring more than 5 years!

I should point out that the test password I used which is, for the purposes of this test, essentially identical to mine in all aspects. When one goes to a new site to sign up or when one needs to reset a password often there is a little ‘strength meter’ in the form of a bar next to the place you enter your password which is supposed to show you how strong your password is. My current password always maxed this meter out so to say this all came as a bit of a revelation to me would be more than accurate. I thought I was following all the rules and had a fairly strong password. Needless to say over the course of the next week I’ll be upgrading my password at all the sites I use to follow what I have just learned.

How strong is your password? In today’s environment of the Government and Law Enforcement taking liberties with your privacy are you to operating under a false sense of security?

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About lethalleprechaun

I believe in being the kind of man who, when my feet touch the floor in the morn', causes the Devil to say "BUGGER ME! HIMSELF IS UP!" ======== I'm a White Married Heterosexual who fervently believes in the war(s) we are fighting, the Second Amendment which I plan on defending with my last breath and my last round of ammunition as well as Arizona's stringent law on Immigration and the need for the border wall. I'm a right of center Con-centrist with Tea Party & Republican sympathies who drives an SUV. I am a Life Time Member of the NRA, a Charter Member of the Patriots' Border Alliance and North American Hunters Association. If there is a season for it and I can shoot one I'll eat it and proudly wear its fur. I believe PETA exists solely to be a forum for Gays, Vegetarians, Hollywood snobbery to stupid to get into politics and Soybean Growers. The ACLU stopped protecting our civil liberties sometime after the 1960s and now serves its own bigoted headline grabbing agenda much in the same way as the Southern Poverty Law Center. I am ecstatic that WE the PEOPLE finally got mad enough to rise up and take back the Government from WE the ENTITLED and reverently wish the Liberals would just get over the loss and quit whining/protesting all the time. After all they're just reaping what they've sown. I am Pro-choice both when it comes to the issue of abortion AND school prayer. I believe in a government for the people, by the people which represents and does the people's will. Therefore I an Pro States rights and mandatory term limits but against special interest group campaign contributions and soft money. I think that sports teams who allow their players to sit or take a knee during the National Anthem should be boycotted until the message is received that this is not acceptable behavior for role models for children. I believe Congressional salaries should be voted on bi-annually by the people they represent and not by themselves. I think Congress should be subject to every law they pass on the populace including any regarding Social Security or Healthcare. Speaking of the Healthcare bill (or con job as I see it) I hope Trump will overturn it and set things back to normal. I oppose the building of an Mosque or ANY Islamic center at or within a 10 mile radius of Ground Zero in New York. I will fight those in favor of this until hell freezes over and then I will continue to fight it hand to hand on the ice. Further I think the ban on immigrants from certain nations known to harbor and promote terrorism is a justified measure, at least until we can come up with better methods of vetting and tracking those non citizens we allow in the country. We did not inflict this measure on them those who refuse to point out, denounce or fight radical religious terrorism brought this upon themselves.
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