Dragon Laffs #1229


Dragon Laffs 33
Good Morning Campers! 
It’s finally:
saturday
Trespassers
It finally got here!  I was fairly convinced it wasn’t going to make it this week!
More Big NEWS!
As promised, your favorite dragon is a grandpa again!  So recently that we don’t even have a picture yet!  Rose Michelle was born about 730 this morning weighing in at 6lbs and 15 oz and 19 inches long!  I can’t wait to see her and share her picture with you guys.
Congratulations to her wonderful parents.  I love you all very much!
Okay, so that ought to be it on the grandbaby front, for a little while, anyway.
I may be having a visit of grandbabies tomorrow…if so…stay tuned for pictures. 

It’s time to get started on the meat and potatoes of today’s issue… so…

1 

If there were just a few cards, it would be interesting and mysterious. But, there seems to be a couple hundred cards. Where do they come from?

Where do the cards come from?

CLICK ON CARD

Adult Content 2

Warning!  X-rated material ahead!

Shocking picture of a black woman with two different colored boobs!

And then a GREAT shot of a perfect camel toe!

 

 

Down2

 

 

3a

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The new chief of the International Monetary Fund says the US
must raise its debt ceiling or the world’s economy will collapse.
I liked the IMF better with the old guy who was too busy nailing hotel
maids to criticize the US government.

3b

A picture’s worth a thousand words…..

The PERFECT visual example of what the hell is

wrong with our government!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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3

DragonPapa1 (139)

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Barack Obama’s birthday is coming up in a few days. He said he
isn’t hiring a clown for his party, but Joe Biden plans to attend
any way. Biden plans to pose as a clown and twist inflated balloon
animals at Obama’s birthday party. While the vice president
has never done this before, he believes he can do it because he’s
seen a lot of twisted Congress members with inflated egos.

5

A short grammar lesson …

In the world of hi-tech gadgetry, I’ve noticed that more and more people who send text messages and emails have long forgotten the art of capitalization.

For those of you who fall into this category, please take note of the following statement:

“Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse… and helping your uncle jack off a horse.”

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f2008121201

To Lethal Leprechaun when he calls me fat, well here’s a FACT:
Heat makes objects expand….
So there you have it!  I’m not fat, I’m just hot!  Blame global warming!

572

A poll says that 46% of Americans think that most members of Congress

are corrupt. The other 54% think that being corrupt is their most

positive quality.

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1_thumb7_thumb_thumb_thumb_thumb_thuRubic's LunchretiringPlatonic

Too Funny….. The new movie: “The Man Without A FaceBook”
http://www.makeuseof.com/tech-fun/man-facebook/

 

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Okay, so this one’s implications are more scary than funny, but still, very well done.
http://www.makeuseof.com/tech-fun/gmail-man-gmail-parody-video-microsoft/

575

This one is very funny.  A classic Buddy Hackett Skit.
http://redux.com/stream/item/1126763/BABY-ELEPHANT-TRUNK-PENIS-BY-BUDDY-HACKETT

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This is a GREAT commercial. These guys look like they are REALLY getting it!

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Sent in by our dear camper Jeannie, but referenced to a blog called The Grouch at Right Truth.  I’ve gone through some of his blog and it’s quite good.  He could be a fellow camper.  Anyway, the link to this original article is at the bottom.  Enjoy!

Thursday, July 21, 2011

The Americans with No Abilities Act (AWNAA)

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-V09FOZBbtnY/TihAiMLTeiI/AAAAAAAAEBw/Xz-bPhpMjVI/s1600/barry.jpg

Washington DC. July 21, 2011

The Obama administration is urging both houses of the congress to pass sweeping legislation that will provide new benefits to many Americans: The Americans with No Abilities Act (AWNAA). President Obama said he will sign it as soon as it hits his desk.

The AWNAA is being hailed as a major legislative goal by advocates of the millions of Americans who lack any real skills or ambitions.

“Roughly 50 percent of Americans do not possess the competence and drive necessary to carve out a meaningful role for themselves in society.” said California Democrat senator, Barbara Boxer. “We can no longer stand by and allow people of inability to be ridiculed and passed over. With this legislation, employers will no longer be able to grant special favors to a small group of workers simply because they have some idea of what they are doing. We are legalizing another protected class of Americans.”

In a Capitol Hill press conference, House Minority Leader, Nancy Pelosi, D-CA. and Senate Majority Leader, Harry Reid, D-NV. pointed to the success of the U.S. Postal Service, which has a long standing policy of providing opportunity without regard to performance. Approximately 74 percent of postal employees lack any job skills, making this agency the single largest US. employer of persons of inability.

Private sector industries with good records of non-discrimination against the inept include retail sales (72%), the airline industry (68%), and home improvement warehouse stores (65%), as well as your local Radio Shack (98%). At the state government level, the Department of Motor Vehicles also has an excellent record of hiring persons of inability (a whopping 83%).

Under AWNAA, more than 25 million “middle man” positions will be created with important sounding titles but little real responsibility, thus providing an illusory sense of purpose and performance.

Mandatory non-performance based raises and promotions will be given so as to guarantee upward mobility for even the most inept employees. The legislation provides substantial tax breaks to corporations that promote a significant number of persons of inability into middle management positions. and gives a tax credit to small and medium sized businesses that agree to hire one clueless worker for every two talented hires.

Finally the AWNAA contains tough new measures to make it more difficult to discriminate against the non-abled, banning, for example, discriminatory interview questions such as, “Do you have any skills or experience that relate to this job?”

“As a non-abled person, I can’t be expected to keep up with people who have something going for them,” said Keri Cox, who lost his position as a lug nut twister at the GM plant in Flint, MI, due to his inability to remember “righty tighty, lefty loosey”. “This new law should be real good for people like me,” Cox added. With the passage of this bill, Cox and millions of other untalented citizens will finally see a light at the end of the tunnel.

Said Senator, Dick Durbin, D-IL, “As a senator with no abilities, I believe the same privileges that elected officials enjoy ought to be extended to every American with no abilities. It is our duty as lawmakers to provide each and every American citizen, regardless of his or her inadequacy, with some sort of space to take up in this great nation and a good salary for doing so.

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WTF_thumb1_thumb_thumb_thumb_thumb_t[2]w4w5w6

Breaking NewsThis is friggin’ GREAT!!!! And haven’t we all been saying the same thing for years, that global warming is a pure made up topic!  Well, now NASA itself is throwing the bull-shit flag!  See U.S. Government, you pissed them off.  Now, what have they got to loose in arguing with you, their funding?  Too Late!  Here’s the article:

New NASA Data Blow Gaping Hole In Global Warming Alarmism

NASA satellite data from the years 2000 through 2011 show the Earth’s atmosphere is allowing far more heat to be released into space than alarmist computer models have predicted, reports a new study in the peer-reviewed science journal Remote Sensing. The study indicates far less future global warming will occur than United Nations computer models have predicted, and supports prior studies indicating increases in atmospheric carbon dioxidetrap far less heat than alarmists have claimed.

Study co-author Dr. Roy Spencer, a principal research scientist at the University of Alabama in Huntsville and U.S. Science Team Leader for the Advanced Microwave Scanning Radiometer flying on NASA’s Aqua satellite, reports that real-world data from NASA’s Terra satellite contradict multiple assumptions fed into alarmist computer models.

“The satellite observations suggest there is much more energy lost to space during and after warming than the climate models show,” Spencer said in a July 26 University of Alabama press release. “There is a huge discrepancy between the data and the forecasts that is especially big over the oceans.”

In addition to finding that far less heat is being trapped than alarmist computer models have predicted, the NASA satellite data show the atmosphere begins shedding heat into space long before United Nations computer models predicted.

The new findings are extremely important and should dramatically alter the global warming debate.

Scientists on all sides of the global warming debate are in general agreement about how much heat is being directly trapped by human emissions of carbon dioxide (the answer is “not much”). However, the single most important issue in the global warming debate is whether carbon dioxide emissions will indirectly trap far more heat by causing large increases in atmospheric humidity and cirrus clouds. Alarmist computer models assume human carbon dioxide emissions indirectly cause substantial increases in atmospheric humidity and cirrus clouds (each of which are very effective at trapping heat), but real-world data have long shown that carbon dioxide emissions are not causing as much atmospheric humidity and cirrus clouds as the alarmist computer models have predicted.

The new NASA Terra satellite data are consistent with long-term NOAA and NASA data indicating atmospheric humidity and cirrus clouds are not increasing in the manner predicted by alarmist computer models. The Terra satellite data also support data collected by NASA’s ERBS satellite showing far more longwave radiation (and thus, heat) escaped into space between 1985 and 1999 than alarmist computer models had predicted. Together, the NASA ERBS and Terra satellite data show that for 25 years and counting, carbon dioxide emissions have directly and indirectly trapped far less heat than alarmist computer models have predicted.

In short, the central premise of alarmist global warming theory is that carbon dioxide emissions should be directly and indirectly trapping a certain amount of heat in the earth’s atmosphere and preventing it from escaping into space. Real-world measurements, however, show far less heat is being trapped in the earth’s atmosphere than the alarmist computer models predict, and far more heat is escaping into space than the alarmist computer models predict.

When objective NASA satellite data, reported in a peer-reviewed scientific journal, show a “huge discrepancy” between alarmist climate models and real-world facts, climate scientists, the media and our elected officials would be wise to take notice. Whether or not they do so will tell us a great deal about how honest the purveyors of global warming alarmism truly are.

James M. Taylor is senior fellow for environment policy at The Heartland Institute and managing editor of Environment & Climate News.

Highlighting added by Impish

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Great Ad!

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Dear Mr. President, Members of Congress and the Senate,

Here we go again.  Another round of nonsense and non performance in managing our country.  We the people, spend all day listening to the claptrap that comes out of Washington while all of you are more concerned with your political posturing than you are with the welfare of the estate you were put in charge of.

As your employer, we the people say: “You’re Fired!”  You have proven yourselves incompetent and incapable of doing the job that you not only promised to do, but swore you were capable of doing.  I don’t believe either of those statements are true.

You have been more concerned with getting yourselves re-hired at the next contract term than you have been with doing your job.  This doesn’t impress us!  At the end of this contract you will be out of a job!

You want to change our minds?  You still have time.  Not much, but a little.  Let’s start with this:
1. Why is it that Social Security, Medicare, military pay and the like are the first things that you scare us with, like there’s nothing you can do about it?  We want to see each and everyone of you stop YOUR pay and that of your staff if a debt solution isn’t met.
2. Any sitting congress member or senator who is in office while our country doesn’t have a balanced budget and is working towards paying off our country’s ridiculous debt, is ineligible for re-election. And of course that goes for the president, also.
3. You can’t come up with a decision?  You DON’T walk out!  You walk off the job, that means you just quit and we will hire your replacement!  Get your ass to work!
4a

It’s possible that the perfect solution is at hand.  In a cartoon sent to me by our Queen of Puns, Diaman and featuring Maxine, whom many of you seem to like quite a bit.  It makes good sound sense.

People of the United States, remember this crap when it comes election time.  Remember how these high-hatted bull-shit artists treated youre gonna get itus, their employers.  How little disregard they showed for OUR assets and OUR hard earned dollars.  How much crap do we have to take before we fire these assholes? 

Have a great weekend my friends.
1_thumb1_thumb_thumb_thumb_thumb_thuImpish Dragon 2

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2 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1229

  1. Dan from NYC says:

    Welcome to Rose Michelle! What’s exactly is in the water out there Impish?

    Regarding the lapel pin flag made in the PRC.
    Isn’t is emblematic of what our politicians and the left has been doing been doing straight along?
    Between the farce in Washington that makes the government look like gangster crack heads in need of a debt fix to keep their payola train
    rolling right along and the entitlement class mentality that is sucking the country dry.

    As for the last word, it would be great if there was some weight behind the words, “You’re Fired!”. Given gerrymandered districts and the
    eternal choice between shit and shittier at election time they just don’t carry much weight. The fix is in on the con and we’re the marks.

  2. lynn fux says:

    MAZAL -TOV IMPISH,BOY YOU HAVE YOUR SPOILING CUT OUT FOR YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I RECENTLY WAS IN AUSTRALIA AND WHEN I ASKED MY FRIENDS WHAT I SHOULD BRING FROM ISRAEL THEY SAID FLAGS. SURE ENOUGH EVERYTIME I WENT TO BUY ONE THEY ALL SAID MADE IN CHINA,JUST LIKE OUR AMERICAN ONE!!!!!

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