I just finished up  Monday’s episode and am jumping right into today’s.  As I explained in The Last Word of that one, I have a lot on my plate right now, so when I have an opportunity to get ahead, I’m going to take it. So, today is January 22nd, the day you are reading this, that is.  A quick glance at the calendar tells us that it is the Celebration of Life Day and National Blonde Brownie Day … so … yeah.

Celebration of Life Day seems like it’s about Children and being grateful for the life that we have and seems to have started out as a pro-life/anti-abortion celebration, but looking at their official website now, it looks like the left has moved in and that theme has disappeared.

Anyway, let’s move on to our theme for today … which is …

 

So, today’s theme is the same theme as the other day’s themes…lol! Let’s go!

 

 

Texting Codes for Seniors

ATD – At The Doctor’s
BFF – Best Friends Funeral
WTF – Where’s The Funeral?
BTW – Bring The Wheelchair
BYOC – Bring Your Own Carer
DWI – Driving While Incontinent
DOA – Demented On Arrival
VIP – Very Interesting Pills
DIAY – Did It At Yoga
GBH – Got Bad Hemorrhoids
GBF – Gopher’s Battery Flat
BHY – Broke Hip Yesterday
RIP – Rehab In Progress
LOL – Living On Laxatives
OMG – Oh My… Gas!
FBM – Fabulous Bowel Movement
WMN – What’s My Name?
WWITA – What Was I Texting About?

I know people like this.

 

 

Scientists have grown human vocal cords in a petri dish…

The results speak for themselves.

Me: Please bring me a screwdriver.  

Her: Flat head, Phillips, or Vodka?

And that’s when I knew she was THE one!

These days, I find myself a lot like my pants zipper.

Down most of the time and for no apparent reason.

 

 

Interfering with legitimate law enforcement officers….

 

 

When someone says, “You’ve changed,” it simply means you’ve stopped living your life their way.

Okay, I could see that in Florida, but DETROIT!?!?

 

 

Some people will never ask for your side of the story because the side they heard fits how they want to feel about you.

I feel when people say, “She’s really nice once you get to know her.” They might as well be saying, “She’s a bitch but you’ll get used to her.”

EXACTLY!  What in the world is WRONG with you people!!!!

 

 

A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone who knows you.

The person you think of as “yourself” exists only for you, and even you don’t really know who that is. Every person you meet, have a relationship with, or make eye contact on the street with, creates a version of “you” in their heads. Your not the same person  to your mom, your dad, your  siblings, than you are to your co-workers, your neighbors or your friends. There are a thousand different versions of yourself out there, in people’s minds. A “you” exists in each version, and yet your “you”, “yourself”, isn’t really a “someone” at all.

What an incredibly interesting concept … in some ways absolutely right, but in truth, 100% wrong. I AM ME. Your perception of ME, does not change who I am, it’s just your perception of me. I know who I am, and that can change, but it is still me…because me can change. Silly.

It could work…

 

Every time you are able to find some humor in a difficult situation, YOU WIN.

You just don’t see enough people being taken away in straight jackets anymore.

And that’s it.  Tomorrow I’ll work on Saturday’s but for now…