Dragon Laffs #2061


Good Morning Fellow Campers!

It’s Thursday for you guys.  I’m starting this on Monday, so I’m time traveling again.  Today has been a busy day for me.  I have 45 minutes before I have to get ready for Grief Group so I’m trying to put a couple of lines on here to get started before this day is gone. 

Like I said, busy day for me. 

It started out at 0530 hrs with my phone ringing … from work … with them reporting to me of an incident that took place that they have to report to me.  Not a big deal, nothing I can talk about — and no, for those of you wondering, it was not A BIG DEAL.  Something normal that happens all the time that just has to be reported to me when it happens.  The unusual part was that it was at 0530.  Now, I was getting up at 0600 anyway, so it wasn’t THAT big of a deal.  I had to run out to the base to pick up my laptop that was sitting there hooked up to the LAN getting all the updates it’s been missing out on being home here with me over the past 100 weeks.

But, since I had a little extra time this morning, I ran by my favorite breakfast spot and got my Deputy God’s favorite breakfast sandwich.  Yup, you know the one.  One of the ONLY breakfast sandwiches you are going to be able to get when you get to Heaven.  You know the one.  

That’s Heaven’s food.  Makes my mouth water just thinking about it.  Anyway, like I said, stopped and picked one up for me and my Deputy, since he was the only one that was going to be in today.  I had to make sure the laptop was back in working order and either pick up the laptop, run home and run some reports or run the reports there…after the Deputy and I had our LONG overdue morning briefing.  So, we talked for a bit, he went off to teach a class and I ran a bunch of reports, packed everything back up and left with JUST enough time to make it to Physical Therapy. 

Need I remind you, that I am now down to ONE WEEK remaining before I go back to work FULL TIME.  I’m trying not to be worried about going back to work FULL TIME (I don’t know why it keeps doing that, but every time I write the word full and time together it comes our FULL TIME).  Hmmm.  Must be a subconscious thing.    

An hour’s worth of PT, 30 minutes of mine and 30 minutes of theirs, then it was off to the pharmacy to pick up medicine for the Izzy Dragon and I and to get back home, hook up the work laptop, get on the government website connections (VPN) and the little baby spins like a top again.  Did several more hours of work and getting things ready for me to go back to the office next week and now I’m getting ready to go to Grief Group tonight. 

And that, ladies and gentlemen and all mythological creatures, both near and far has been my day SO FAR.  I have to still feed Pepper and Willow Dragon, drop Izzy Dragon at her place of employment, go to the next town over for class, make two stops on the way, have the two hour Grief Group session, come home for about an hour, then go back out and pick Miss Izzy back up again, and then it ought to be about time to curl up with my tail tucked and my wings folded for another day. 

WOW!!! 

Like I said, busy day. 

And tomorrow, I get to play darts. 

Whooooo Ahhhh!!!!

Oh!  And tomorrow is also Papa Dragon Most Senior’s 87th birthday!  So, a phone call will be thrown in there somewhere.  LOL!

Now, 

Being MALE is a matter of Birth, Being a MAN is a matter of Age, But being a GENTLEMAN is a matter of CHOICE

I had to try five different examples of that before I figured out it was true!!

ON THE INTERNET YOU CAN BE ANYTHING YOU WANT TO BE.  

It’s strange so many people choose to be so completely stupid.

Stop asking me what I do for fun!!!!…………

Illegal shit. 

Now leave me the hell alone.

“I said Smile for the camera!”

This one is from out dear camper friend Joe L in NJ.  And I want to apologize right up front, cause it’s a REAL GROANER!  But!!!  I’ll admit it!  Right here and Right Now!  I laughed.  Truly I did.  So, here goes:

In the days of old, when Genghis Kahn’s men were running over Asia, they set their sights on further shores. Rather than ‘huns’, these warriors were known as Kahn’s men, or simply, Kahns. 

When they had conquered all the way to the water’s edge, they build boats, gathered their loot, and bravely went to sea. By a sad twist of fate, they encountered an island of lepers, which resulted in most of the crew being infected. Hastily leaving that island, they set sail again, but by the time they reached Ireland, there wasn’t much left of them. 

Disembarking on stubby limbs, they set forth, but were soon set upon by the natives for the riches they carried. Rotted away, but still clever, they hid on the island and awaited rescue, and the locals never did get their hands on the treasure. And that’s how the story of the little people got started in Ireland – the leper Kahn’s and their pots of gold. 

Cunning though diseased, the Kahns were never fooled by those who tried to trick them out of their pots of gold by swapping them for an empty pot – thus the saying: “You cannot change a leper’s pots”. 

Someone told me I need to stop using F-bombs.

What the fuck is an F-bomb?

Your kids would have fewer allergies if they ate dirt and licked some salt blocks like the rest of us dis growing up.

Just an absolutely awesome picture!

As you can imagine, I’ve had more than my fair share of tears over the last several months and almost every time one or both of my puppy dragons have come over to me and laid their heads in my lap or pressed themselves against my legs or something similar when I have been crying.  So, I can verify that this is very true.

Several people have sent me copies of the first one of the two of these that are on this video, but I choose this video because it also has a bonus video with it.  So, enjoy…and thanks to all of you who sent me copies of this.

Those are definitely NOT my puppies watching the fireworks!  Mine HATE fireworks!

One day I was born.

Then everything bothered me.

And that brings us up to date.

I really felt uncomfortable driving into the cemetery.  The GPS blurted out, “You have reached your final destination.”

Johnny Depp gets 15 million dollars for being with a nut job. 

All these years I’ve done it for free.

Girl Friend:  I’m sick and tired of you pretending you’re a detective.  I think we should split up. 

Me:  Good idea!  We can cover more ground that way.

I’ll Never Understand…5,000 years of eating all kinds of bread and then suddenly, in the course of a decade, everyone is allergic to gluten. 

These next couple were sent to me by Paul K. and he writes: 

Liberty Arms is a gun and ammo shop in Tazwell, Tennessee with a patriotic sense of humor. Their billboard sign changes frequently.

They are one of the largest sellers of guns and ammo in the country as I hear it.

Thanks Paul!

Nicely said, guys!

If you haven’t realized the hypocrisy in the easiest and obvious of things, how are you possibly going to recognize it in the more complex and hidden?

Just like they are trying to take away the 2nd amendment and our weapons while arming up the branches of the government that make no sense in giving guns to!

So now burning a Gay Flag is called a “Hate Crime” but burning the American Flag is “FREE SPEECH”!?!?

I think I’m starting to lose my mind. 

But as long as I keep the part that tells me when I gotta pee, I should be okay.

Is there a world where this is even possible?

And it’s a shame we live in a world where this is probably required.

THIS TOO SHALL PASS

It might pass like a kidney stone 

But it will pass

NOTICE TO THE PUBLIC 

Due to the coronavirus, we are asking protesters to work from home and destroy their own property.

Thank you.

 

Remember when we talked about the extra IRS agents being hired?  I wanted to show you guys this visual real quick before we ended today:

 

Think about it…23,000 Dept. of State Employees + 35,000 Dept. of Justice Employees + 60,000 US Customs and Border Protection Employees = 118.000 total Employees.  Not even close to the total 165.000 IRS employees.  You gotta wonder why, right? 

That’s it.  That’s all I wanted to point out. 

So, go out there and have a great day and until we meet again, may your days be filled with Love and Happiness.

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4 Responses to Dragon Laffs #2061

  1. Marsha Mastrangelo says:

    I had a conversation with my Dad a few years back. I was telling him that what we have in Washington was so much worse that those ” hippies” of the 60s (yeah I’m old) that he had issues with and lectured me on. Then he said Stop who do you think those people are? Thanks to google I was able to see what each one was doing in 1960, 1965, 1970 etc. He was right …again.

  2. Leah D says:

    Why do, they need so many people? Why do they need so many guns with ammunition? They are going after all the drug traffickers who aren’t paying taxes. With all the back taxes they owe, we could pay off the National Debt!
    revenuer
    [ rev-uhn-yoo-er, -uh-noo- ]
    noun Informal.
    an agent of the U.S. Treasury Department, especially one whose responsibility is to enforce laws against illegal distilling or bootlegging of alcoholic liquor.

  3. jhjoseph says:

    Some great ones today. Made my day. God Bless You.

  4. Friggin Pete says:

    People are NOT allergic to gluten, I’ve been saying it for years now, people are reacting to glyphosate from Round-up and other Monsanto/Bayer products and the over 750 other products than contain glyphosate, that we are being poisoned with.

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