Dragon Laffs #1913


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Good Morning Campers,

It’s Monday and I hope everyone had a great Independence Day Weekend!  It was an exciting weekend at the Dragon cavern.  Izzy Dragon had her first real day of work at her first real job.  Since I’m writing this Saturday morning and since she’s still at said shift, I don’t know how it went, but fingers crossed and prayers currently being said … over and over again.  We all really want this to work out for her.  But, when she gets home in 2 1/2 hours I’ll let you guys know.

Anyway, moving on to other things.  Since it’s too early to talk about our donation program just yet, let’s move on to the laughter and then we’ll talk about the other stuff when we come to it.  Does that sound like a plan?  Good then let’s do that.

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I guess that’s the world’s shortest fairy tale.

[Inventing the toaster]

Engineer:  Ok, it burns the bread if you put it at 4

Chief Engineer:  Perfect.  Make it go up to 8

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How does an attorney sleep?  First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other side.

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?  One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

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What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind?  A maybe.

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I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage.  I lost my case.

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Dragon Pic Green Gif

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Celtic Dragons are not to be ignored …

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Which country’s capital has the fastest-growing population?  Ireland.  Every day it’s Dublin.

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I saw an ad for burial plots, and I thought: “That’s the last thing I need!”

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Son: “Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?”
Dad: “No sun.”

The previous puns have been brought to you by Lynn … thanks Lynn.

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Fantasy Pic Green

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“It’s mine, mine, mine!  It’s all mine!”

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Mail box

What do you say we do some mail?  Here’s our first one from …

Leah D

Forget Banks, what about the IRS? I mailed my taxes March 23. I have been checking every day or two, they kept saying they have not received them. Three months later, On June 28, they say they received them (which means they actually opened them to be processed). On June 29, they tell me they are processed, and my refund will be deposited in 21 days.
They charge late filers interest, shouldn’t they give that to filers that have to wait?

Especially since it’s your money that they are returning to you.  But, everything is being blamed on COVID, so we are accepting unacceptable excuses for everything these days. 


Marsha M

Yeah good news on test….something good! Been stressful week. News is crazy…buildings falling.. I can not imagine what those families are going through…..also saw where bunch of beautiful ladies entered a beauty contest and was beat by a dude in a dress…sounds like a song I used to hear on the radio before the world got WOKE. I have had high bp since age of 24..40 years, the only thing i can say is perhaps it’s not really a problem… when my blood pressure goes up people around me get to live another day…my coping mechanism maybe.

Yeah, the world is crazy.  And that’s pretty much what the doc said.  Mrs. Dragon has had blood pressure issues since she was a teenager … pretty odd really.  But, there it is.  I’m glad the doctor thinks she’s going to be okay.


Cynical John

Thank you for everything you do. Thanks to everyone in uniform for what they do. I thank God I was born an American. Happy Fourth of July to everyone!

Thank you Cynical John for your words, and I am also quite proud and happy to be born an American. 


Leah D

Our military should not have to pay taxes on their wages! If you can call $14 an hour wages . . . .

$14 an hour for the job that they do AND to be unappreciated by at least half of the people they do it for.  Yeah and they pay taxes, too.

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Went on a date with a guy years ago and told him I might have narcolepsy to which he looked at me weirdly, changed the subject and he never called me back – years later he asked if I still fancied dead people and it turns out he thought I meant necrophilia.

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educated

efficiency

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Elephants

Elitism

email and bacon

Embaressment

Emo Bunny

Emo Cows

Emotional_Turmoil

And here’s some 4th of July cartoons and memes that I missed yesterday:

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And how does a 462 (a weapons mechanic … bomb loader … what I was when I was active duty) do a cook out … thanks to Wheats for sending this one to me!  And yes, I want one!

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Daughter:  What does gays mean?

Me:  Well, you know mum and dad love each other – two men can love each other the same way.

Her:  So, what does “penetrating gays” mean?

Me: Er … read me the whole sentence.

Her:  “She stared at him with a penetrating gaze.”

Me:  Oh

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 Trust me, When I woke up today, I had no plans to be awesome.

But shit happens.

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And the day after Independence Day, there should be some of these … most especially these …

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Hey California, since you are leading the charge in deciding to pay reparations to the descendants of slaves, I’ve got a questions for you …

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Read this and if you still think we need to defund the police, read the damn thing again!!!

I wasn’t going to use this next one this week, but I just read about fucking congress people and representatives bad mouthing Independence Day and well, fuck them.  I was going to save this next essay for a different day when we could debate it a bit, but fuck it.  Let’s get it all out there to talk about.  Thanks to Lynn for sending this one in:

Two Imperatives That Will Change

the Trajectory of Our Country

By: Cheval

May 28, 2021

Of all the problems facing our nation right now, there are two that rise above all the others, and, therefore, two imperatives that if not resolved, Americans will lose the ability to change the trajectory of our country and retain our freedoms.

Imperative One

The first imperative is that the 2020 presidential and senatorial elections must be corrected. That means taking action to right the wrong. The majority of Republicans and a growing number of Americans are becoming aware that the Left committed vast and monumental election fraud. Everything downstream of the fraud is consequently illegitimate.

Therefore, we have an illegitimate president, which has led to illegitimate executive orders, illegitimate Senate, and non-Senate-approved appointments to critical executive branch leadership positions. These individuals will continue to drive thus-illegitimate domestic, economic, and foreign policies, wreaking havoc and driving our nation further into the ground. Lack of legitimacy has eroded the US standing within the international community, greatly weakening American diplomatic, economic, and military influence. We also have two illegitimate senators from the state of Georgia and one from Arizona that have tipped the balance of power in the Senate, and indeed the entire legislature, resulting in one-party rule for at least the next two years.

Rightfully so, election audits are being conducted in Arizona, Georgia, Michigan, New Hampshire, Wisconsin, within other swing and non-swing states. However, the audits will take months or possibly years to adjudicate in the courts, running into the same deep state obstructions following the 2020 elections. The battle to make the 2020 election right needs to be waged in the court of public opinion sooner, not later, in order for the People to demand immediate action. Election fraud has been documented by hundreds of affidavits nationwide.

Statisticians and mathematicians have demonstrated that the results are computational impossibilities. Civilian and government cyber experts have the entire record of actual cyber-attacks on our election machines originating outside our nation’s borders before, during, and after the election. To date, the evidence has yet to be presented inside a courtroom.

What is being pursued by several state legislatures is to fix election integrity by tightening the more obvious controls that prevent fraud in order to take back the House in 2022 and the Presidency in 2024. This is all well and good, necessary, and monumentally important.

However, given the damage that Biden has done in a mere four months, imagine the damage a Biden-Harris presidency and a Democrat majority in Congress can do over two or four years.

We as a nation cannot afford as a nation to wait two or four years to combat damage that may be permanent and irreparable.

Although not a lawyer, I have contended that the only legitimate and acceptable way for the 2020 election results to be overturned is for state legislatures to decertify and then re-certify their election results, forcing Congress and the Supreme Court to resolve a constitutional crisis that cannot be brushed under the carpet this time, regardless of inevitable violence and blowback by the Leftist groups, lawyers, and media.

The illegitimate Biden administration must be deposed by legitimate means; otherwise, any challenge to overturn the results would be seen also as illegitimate.

There have been calls for another election; however, the cumulative time to complete audits plus the time necessary to put together another election would push things well into 2022 and beyond, fighting the Left all the way.

The true results from the 2020 election are known, awaiting audit validation, and will demonstrate that a clear reversal is in order.

However, the urgency and pace of the audits need to pick up. In short, lesser matters and distractions need to be put aside, and laser focus and resources placed on speeding up the audits to run concurrently, not sequentially, with corresponding legal cases built in anticipation of audit results.

We know what the audits will reveal. Let us not reinvent the wheel by holding yet another election that will be plagued with shenanigans as long as the same voting machines are still in use and election integrity legislation and associated safeguards will not have been enacted in time.

Imperative Two

The second imperative is that all Americans need to be made aware that COVID-19 pandemic was a fabricated global event, and was fabricated for political purposes to ultimately use as a means to seize political control of our government by the Leftist US and global elites to direct our health, our lives, and our freedoms. Using the pandemic as a pre-text, lives and livelihoods of millions have been destroyed or disrupted due to unwarranted government action.

Lockdowns, mask and distancing mandates running counter-science, flip-flopping CDC guidance, media suppression and censoring of vital health information, and now government threats and coercion to require vaccines and vaccine passports, are herding the populace down a path of no-return from which we will not recover unless stopped now.

Despite the hype, intentional deception, and fear-mongering by the media, the CDC, and WHO, those who have been following the true science have long ago recognized that the pandemic was less terrible than we were led to believe, perpetrated for nefarious reasons which remain unfathomable.

Americans were made to feel increasingly fearful. Yes, there was a virus, and yes, it is tragic that many of our loved ones did become sick and die. However, in generalized terms, the spread of the virus has been no deadlier and no more horrific than prior flu seasons or past pandemics.

There are four major indicators that would lead an open-minded rational person to conclude that the pandemic was manufactured.

First, per CDC data, the overall death rates in this country and across the world have been eerily similar in comparison with the overall and seasonal death rates experienced over the past few years.

Miraculously, regular flu, cancer, diabetes, and other causes of death fell at the same time Covid was on the rise. Government financial incentives enticed physicians and hospitals to categorize deaths as Covid-related deaths, grossly over-reporting the numbers. The media focused on fictitious total case and death counts, and conveniently failed to report the corresponding fall in other death causes and overall Covid recoveries rates.

Second, after multiple studies that were conveniently ignored by the media, we know that the survivability rate for Covid is 99.9X% for those under 70, nearly exclusively afflicting the 70+ population, the frail, and those with significant co-morbidities.

Third, PCR tests, a.k.a. Covid tests, amped up in sensitivity, were used to detect the minutest lingering virus traces from our pasts, leading to positive test results when people were in fact negative.

Consequently, Covid-related cases and deaths, the foci of the fear, were thus inflated and severely overreported. Researchers in southern California are now suing the CDC because out of 1500 Covid-positive samples sent to Stanford University and other labs for re-testing, 100% came back Covid-negative, but many tested positive for influenza A and B. These results alone should tell us that the number of cases has been wildly over-exaggerated.

When the WHO reduced the sensitivity of the Covid tests just after the Biden inauguration, the number of cases and the pandemic magically began to evaporate.

Fourth, studies and physicians around the globe have proven that Covid is and has been curable. Hydroxychloroquine, zinc, ivermectin, and large doses of vitamin D have been used for decades and have been proven as safe, low-cost cures for Covid. The continent of Africa was largely spared from Covid because millions take hydroxychloroquine regularly for malaria, known as the “Sunday -Sunday pill,” because it is standard practice to take on Sundays. The media, Big Tech, and the Left have gone to great lengths to suppress and censor this information, which would have saved tens of thousands of lives in this country. Why was the lifesaving information withheld?

Masks.

Any honest epidemiologist or virologist worth their salt will tell you succinctly that masks do not stop particles the size of viruses. One epidemiologist informed me that “stopping viruses with a mask is like trying to stop mosquitoes with a chain-link fence.” Mandated mask-wearing has been a ruse and a visual cue to help stoke fear, signal virtue, and make the grand fabrication appear more tactile and real.

So, we were led to believe that the world has experienced the largest pandemic known mankind, because of a survivable and curable virus that afflicts the old and frail, based on manipulation of testing statistics, either intentionally or unintentionally released upon the world. Why?

But wait, there’s more. This fraud of grandest deception is continuing now with the underreported number of post-vaccination deaths and serious side effects. What the public is now led to believe is that the gene-altering jab is a “vaccine,” but it is not a vaccine in the traditional sense. Short-term reactions, such as blood clots and heart problems, are emerging and long-term risks are unknown.

As of this writing, the CDC’s Vaccination Adverse Event Reporting System database, relying on voluntary reporting, for 2021 has recorded 4072 post- Covid jab deaths and over 272,000 post-jab significant side effects. During past epidemics, a vaccine would have been pulled with a mere 25 reported deaths.

There is speculation that the true purpose of the “pandemic” was to inspire the world’s population to want to be injected with a substance that is to this day experimental, non-FDA approved, authorized for emergency use only. On balance, there are more budding costs than documented benefits to a healthy population, not to mention significant profits for big Pharma.

Yet, despite the growing risks, Federal and state governments are doing whatever they can to incentivize and coerce people to get the jab and vaccine passports, or otherwise lose their freedoms of entry and access to businesses, events, travel, and educational institutions.

These restrictions are only the beginning. Again, why? Why the urgency while Covid is in retreat?

Control. This will not end well.

What’s next?

The strongest hand in poker is a royal straight flush. When holding this hand, the usual play is to go “all in.” By controlling big tech, Hollywood, education, sports, woke corporations, and now, based on fraudulent elections within a backdrop of a fabricated pandemic, the Left holds the levers of Federal government power. The Left believes it has a royal straight flush and has gone all in. It is not going to back down. This is their moment in time for the ultimate power grab.

One problem: The Left is missing the final card it needs; a.k.a. the People. The Left is making a bet that it will win – as long as the people remain silent, docile, provide unspoken consent, and remain compliant.

So, by saying we will get them next time by waiting until 2022 or 2024 to regain the levers of government is akin to thinking you will win back all your money when you are nearly out of chips. Was it not Einstein who defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result? The only hand for conservatives to play is the hand we have now, which is based in truth, fact, and evidence. And we hold the trump card – the American people. When finally awakened, the People will not let the current state stand.

Therefore, the American people need to be carpet-bombed and saturated with the evidence of the two greatest frauds ever perpetrated in our history. Evidence needs to be packaged in a professional, unbiased, incontrovertible, simple enough to understand story so that all American people can understand how, why, and by whom these two frauds were perpetrated.

Evidence needs to be pushed beyond the reach of big tech, deep state, and mainstream media by every sharable means available NOW to all Americans.

Those who want to see the truth have seen the truth. Those not interested in seeing the truth need to have truth thrust before them. It is these people that need to be reached.

As more Americans are shown the evidence, there will be an increased upswell demanding further audits, explanations, justice for those perpetrating the frauds, and demands for state legislators to take immediate action to change our trajectory. We are beginning to see this, but it needs to accelerate.

Conservatives have been lulled into inaction and continue to lack a sense of urgency to stop the Left’s assault. The Left’s at-first slow march has accelerated to a now dizzying pace, reaching a crescendo with Biden’s first 100 days in office, negating many of Trump’s achievements and policies, while disingenuously implementing new policies intentionally disguised or purposefully hidden from the American public’s view prior to the 2020 election, now on full display. How can it get any worse, right?

We need the “great awakening” now. When the other side goes all in, you either go all in, or you fold. It is time to go all in; not business as usual, which is how we got where we are in the first place. Folding is not an option.

Reticent Republicans will not back these two imperatives unless they understand their own political peril and receive enough pressure from the People that we do not want to wait until 2022 or 2024 to gain back government control, and hence our country.

I contend that resolution of these two imperatives will change our trajectory and put us back on the right path.

The reason these two imperatives are so critical, in contrast to all the other problems that we need to solve, is that these two frauds, when exposed, will do more to finally awaken and demonstrate to the American populace and the rest of the world what the Left is truly about and that the People have been lied to and deceived.

We cannot fix the other failings in politics, culture, education, big tech, cyber, corporatists, domestic terrorism, and increasing threats from China if we do not fix the most pressing problems resulting from a fraudulent election and expose the pandemic for what it was.

Conservatives, Republican politicians, the People must act with urgency in order to take back control of the levers necessary to fix our problems. Resolution will put us on a path to restore our institutions by exposing actions of those behind the curtain, reveal the nefarious and evil acts perpetrated on humankind, and provide the means to ultimately bring down the deep state and hold those responsible finally accountable for the treasonous crimes still being committed against us all.

Last, when resolved, these imperatives will re-enable national and global leaders to take action to stop the advance of socialism, communism, and the other “-isms” plaguing our society, topple the perpetrators, begin the slow march back to freedom, thus restoring the faith of billions across the planet that America remains the world’s beacon and harbor of freedom.

Very well written, very well said, and I must say, I agree with about 95% of what this Cheval has to say.  Now … what do all of you have to say.

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A dentist married a manicurist … they fought tooth and nail.

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Breathtaking

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This is what a Russian Red Fox looks like.

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Know

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Weird Fact

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A highway in Lancaster, California plays the “William Tell Overture” as you drive over it, thanks to some well-placed grooves in the road

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Last Word

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Well, this is it.  The last day has come and gone.  And here is our final list of heroes!  A special thank you to each and every one of these special people who have stepped up and given a little something to help out our Security Forces Lady who was injured.  Everyone gave what they could and none gave more than any other because everyone who gave, gave what they had.  And those that didn’t give, gave their heartfelt wishes and prayers, so all of you should have your names here.  So, thanks to you all.

Steven H.     Dan T.     Leah H.     Carlos W.     Ray S.    

William E.     Carlos W. (again)     Jonathon J.

Donald G.     Patricia G.     Phillip S.     Stephanie C.

Scott H.     and     Impish Dragon

And to let you know how much was raised…when it was all said and done, our wonderful Dragon Laffs Campers raised a total of:

$610.24

And that, my truly wonderful and marvelous friends, ain’t something to sneeze at!  I am so proud of each and every one of you I could just bust!  Thank you all so much!  I will be VERY proud to represent you all when I turn this over to the family.

Cheers,

Impish Dragon

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3 Responses to Dragon Laffs #1913

  1. Stephanie says:

    Covid is real, my son had it. Any virus has to mutate to survive. Deadly strains wind up killing themselves by killing the host, so the variants continue. The common cold has been doing the same thing for years. Fauci gives out the worst case scenarios. New York hospitals allowed it to become as bad as it was because of greed. That greed is why the hospital ships weren’t used. All those involved in how horribly patients were treated should have to answer.
    Some good has come from this.
    The number of colds and flu were way down this year. Masks do help slow down sneezes and coughs so they don’t travel as far. Medical equipment is cleaned more often than it was before. Hand sanitizer is more readily available. Think about how many people use the handle in a public bathroom. Many do not wash their hands, so even tho I do, I still pick up nastiest from the handle.
    If you look you can find positive outcomes. Remember that when you listen to Fauci, he is giving you the worst case, if no one cleans their hands, if people who are sick don’t stay at home, if those who go out don’t cover their face if they sneeze or cough, if you are constantly exposed.
    Love you.
    We, as a society, should still wear masks if we are ill to keep from making others sick.

  2. dowchuckil says:

    cheval put it exactly the way it is.

  3. Leah D says:

    My mind doesn’t even want to play the covid is a farce game. It is to busy worrying about the expanding drought, add high temps, compute the variables of lighting strikes and arson, divide wildfires from urban areas, enumerate firefighters needed, minus available, subtract water, . . . .
    Hell, I got a D in High School Algebra, there is no way I can figure this one out!

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