I’m jumping right in on this one having just finished the last one, simply because I have the time, the dogs are quiet, I’m comfortable, and my son will be here on Sunday to replace the fence, so I have to get ahead.

I know you all are anxiously awaiting the answers to the little quiz I gave you at the end of the last episode so let’s … wait till the end like I gave them to you in the LAST episode.

STOP throwing things at me!!!

I heard someone call mashed potatoes “Irish guacamole” today and I will never call them mashed potatoes again.

No, I don’t wonder about that anymore either. When we can have Gays for Islam (you do realize that in Islam, gays are thrown off roofs, right?) and we have people in Iran celebrating and people in America protesting and others saying that kids in kindergarten can choose their gender and men can have babies!!!! I’m figuratively pulling my hair out of my head here! No, I don’t wonder about how entire countries can be deceived…or at least large portions of it.

Yes … that was a bit of a mini-rant.

Is it the ‘S’ or the ‘C’ that is silent in the word ‘SCENT’?

I just realized that someone replaced the toilet paper roll. I’m now concerned that there is someone living here that I don’t know.

Not one that everyone will get.

I can get you some unicorn shanks, but you ain’t gettin’ any loins!

Worm humor…

Chris sent this to me and it needs to be spread far and wide so that everyone knows how screwed up this country really is. If you or I tried to run our personal household the way the government runs it’s financial “household” we would be put in prison. This is from Chris:

The US..

Newly-released Treasury financial statements show that as of Sept. 30, 2025, the federal government held $6.06 trillion in total assets against a staggering $47.78 trillion in liabilities

At the same time, the government continues to spend far more than it brings in. In fiscal year 2025, federal revenue totaled $5.24 trillion, while spending reached $7.34 trillion.

To put that in terms people would better understand:

A family  owns a house (has assets) worth $61,000, earns $52,000 a year and spends $73,000 a year and owes (or has outstanding debt of) $477,000. That means the family does not pay down the debt each year but adds $21,000 of additional debt each year.

I’m absolutely embarrassed for our country.

My Kid: I feel like you’re always making up rules and stuff. 

Me: Like what? 

My Kid: Like if I don’t clean my room a portal will open and take me to another dimension. 

Me: Well, that’ what happened to your older brother. 

My Kid: What older brother? 

Me: Exactly.

Are you sweating while putting gas in your car? Feeling sick while paying for it?

You’ve got the Carowner virus.

Remember this one from the other issue? Pete just sent me this today:

That’s funny, I just made this one yesterday with the same picture.

I can’t decide which type of mattress to buy.

I might have to sleep on it.

Twice, as a matter of fact … and no, I don’t want to talk about it.

Why’s it always gotta be Bob?

What’s the difference between a kleptomaniac and a literalist?

The literalist takes things literally. The kleptomaniac takes things, literally.

I think the punchline would have been better like this:

The literalist take things literally and the kleptomaniac literally takes things.

But that’s just me.

Celebrate the Ides of March with a donut. In fact …

Eat two, Brute.

For you who don’t know, the Ides of March have already passed…so this joke is a little late. March 15th.

So here we are, it’s Easter Thursday.  The Last Supper, The Garden of  Gethsemane, Judas’ betrayal … a lot going on today. Jesus healed a Roman guard that Peter cut the ear off of and then allowed Himself to be arrested quietly. All the disciples ran away. Then John and Peter quietly followed Jesus to the first “trial” where as Jesus predicted, Peter denied Christ three times before the cock crowed.  Jesus then looked directly at him and Peter ran away in tears and in shame. Jesus later forgives him … of course.

We’re almost straying into Friday…but, since the next issue isn’t until Saturday, we can stray into Friday. 

Friday, Christ is put on trial. A fake trial. An illegal trial in so many different ways. As soon as Pilate says that he finds nothing to charge Him with He should have been released…by Roman law. 

Beaten, whipped, shamed, spit on, ridiculed, disrespected in every possible way. Forced to carry His own cross to Golgotha where He is crucified, died and is then buried.

But Sunday is coming.

Sunday     Is     Coming.

So, the answers to The TWELVE GREATEST DAYS IN HISTORY!

You did realize that they may not have taken place yet, right? Oh? You hadn’t figured that out? Well, it’s all history to God. How many did you get right? Let’s see:

One: The Second Coming of Christ (Rev 19)
Two: The Rapture of the Church (1 Thes 4)
Three: The Ascension of Christ (Acts 2)
Four: The Resurrection of Christ (Matt 28)
Five: The Death of Christ: (Matt 27)
Six: The Birth of Christ: (Luke 2)
Seven: The Completion of the New Testament (Rev 22)
Eight: The Completion of the Old Testament (Mal 4)
Nine: The Birth of the Church (Acts 2)
Ten: The Birth of Israel (Gen 12)
Eleven: The Creation of Man (Gen 1-2)
Twelve: The Creation of the World (Gen 1)

And there you have it. When I first got this quiz, I think I got 6 right and 1 of the top 3. 

I hope you enjoyed this issue as much as I did, until next time…