I just … JUST finished #2427. Trying to get a head start on this one since … you know, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday I usually don’t even get to OPEN my personal laptop, much less do anything like check email or or work on DL.

So, I don’t really have anything to talk about right now, so let’s just jump right into the fun stuff, shall we? That’s what you guys want, anyway.

“A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.”

Most women need a little reassurance. 
Like when she says, “Oh, so you want to see crazy?”
Reassure her that you do not.

A massage is not good enough.

I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

I started a revival band.

We’re called The Defibrillators.

Make sure you check your spelling and grammar before posting anything.

Because there are so many jobless English professors on social media.

The First Rule of Thesaurus Club:

You don’t talk, discuss, converse, speak, chat, confer, deliberate, gab, or gossip about Thesaurus Club.

Milly the Millipede

-A. Harris

Milly was a millipede.
She had a lot of feet.
Which meant that Milly had to think
just walking down the street

or else she’d get all tangled up
and fall down, legs out, flat.
Often, when she rushed about,
it ended up like that.

One time nature called to her.
Distraught, in desperate need,
before she found a bathroom
well… Our poor old Milly peed.

AMEN! That new life now DOES become your responsibility. Your responsibility to care for, to keep alive, to raise or to ensure that it gets the best chance at a good life. If that means that you give it up for adoption to a GOOD family, then so be it, but the BEST chance it has is for YOU to raise it as your own.

“Phonetic” is not.
“Abbreviation” is 12 letters.
“Thesaurus” doesn’t have a synonym.
“Monosyllabic” has five syllables. 

Say what you will about English, but it sure has a sense of humor.

I’m so old… I used a pencil to fix a cassette tape, changed TV channels with a metal know, and asked the operator to make a long-distance call.

Made it through another one.  I’m now far enough ahead that you guys are covered… which makes me feel good. Now, my wishes for you guys are joy, peace, love, and happiness. Be well until next time, my friends.