Well, again I’m at a point where I’m about out of time for this issue, so I’m going to race through this and get you guys an issue out for tomorrow.  So, let’s jump right into it.

 

Do for others with no desire of returned favours. We all should plant some trees we’ll never sit under. 

Anon

What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?

“Oh look! Donut seeds!”

There was a really cute princess walking through the woods, and she heard a voice calling, “Hey Really Cute Princess!”

She looked around and didn’t see anyone but a frog. She started to walk on but the frog called again.

“Hey Really Cute Princess, if you take me home and let me sleep on your pillow, I will turn back into a Handsome Prince!”

It had been a very boring day so she decided to give it a try even though she really didn’t believe the frog.

The Really Cute Princess took the frog home with her and let him sleep on her pillow. When she got up the next day what do you think she found?

There on her pillow sat a really Handsome Prince.

Do you believe the story?

Well neither did her mother!

69 (Nice) Hilariously Dumb Photos That Spiced Up My Afternoon Poop Break

You have GOT to watch this.  It is truly AMAZING!! Thanks Chris!!

Click HERE

And here is the long address to cut and paste https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1aqLL7sEGe/

 

 

Men and women have two distinct views about a wedding.

The husband to be wakes up in the morning, plays a round of golf and counts the minutes until he has to be at the altar. 

The wife to be, on the other hand, wakes up in the morning and is panicking. 

She immediately begins to organize things, making sure everything is in proper order. 

In her mind she is repeating what she has to do.

“All I have to do is go down the aisle, get to the altar, and marry him.” 

She repeats this over and over again, until she begins to shorten it to three words which she continues to repeat… “Aisle, altar, him.” “Aisle, altar, him.” “Aisle, altar, him.” 

Last week my wife and I purchased a new computer. 

We ran into some difficulties while setting it up so we decided to call the customer support phone number we found in the manual.

I picked up the phone and called the number. 

A man answered the phone and I explained the problem to him.

He began rattling off computer jargon. This confused us even more. 

“Sir,” I said politely, “Can you explain what I should do as if I were a small child?”

“Okay,” the computer support guy said, “Son, could you please put your mommy on the phone?”

Photos Where the ‘Ineptitude’ Isn’t Even Surprising

Morris, a professional photographer was invited to dinner at the Goldblums. He took along a few pictures to show the hostess. 

Millie Goldblum looked at his photos and commented, “These are very good! You must have a very good camera.” 

He didn’t make any comment, however, as he was leaving to go home he said, “That was a really delicious meal, Millie!” 

“Thank you!” she replied enthusiastically.

The Morris added, “You must have some very good pots & pans.” 

A famous art collector is walking through the city when he notices a mangy cat lapping milk from a saucer in the doorway of a store. 

He does a double take, as he notices that the saucer is extremely old and very valuable. He walks casually into the store and offers to buy the cat for two dollars. 

The store owner replies, “I’m sorry, but the cat isn’t for sale.” 

The collector says, “Please, I need a hungry cat around the house to catch mice. I’ll pay you twenty dollars for that cat.” 

And the owner says “Sold,” and hands over the cat.

The collector continues, “Hey, for the twenty bucks I wonder if you could throw in that old saucer. The cat’s used to it and it’ll save me having to get a dish.” 

And the owner says, “Sorry buddy, but that’s my lucky saucer. So far this week I’ve sold sixty-eight cats.”

And that’s it, I made it. I hope you all enjoyed.