Happy Monday! I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. We are working our way toward New Year. I can’t believe how fast this year has gone. But, it’s like they say, life is like a roll of toilet paper … and they’re right, it’s definitely going by faster.
So, let’s stop wasting time and get into the fun stuff, shall we?
Please make it soon, Lord.
From our dear Sasquatch:
If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.
~Jay Leno~
The problem with political jokes is they get elected.
~Henry Cate, VII~
We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office
~Aesop~
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
~Nikita Khrushchev~
When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I’m beginning to believe it.
~Clarence Darrow~
Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel.
~John Quinton~
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.
~Author unknown~
Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
~Ronald Reagan~
Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other.
~Oscar Ameringer~
I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them.
~Adlai Stevenson, 1952~
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
~ Tex Guinan~
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.
~Doug Larson~
Sadly this last one.
We’d all like to vote for the best man, but he’s never a candidate.
~Kin Hubbard~
Keep that in mind. We all know someone who is possibly suffering from depression, there is a HUGE difference between trying to “cheer someone up” and “comforting them.”
My blind uncle likes to get out in the warm summer nights and take walks up to the local pub and socialize and have a cold beer, sometimes even get into a game of cards. We live in the country and he would walk about 2 miles to get there. Most evenings after the pub would close someone would offer to drive him home.
One time after a night of playing cards and a few beers, one of the other guys brought my uncle home. My uncle thanked him for the ride and went into the house and got into bed. About 5 minutes later he hears the car leaving.
The next weekend my uncle got to the pub and the same guy was there. He went up to the guy and asked him what he was doing so long outside after he dropped him off.
The guy said, “Well, when I drop someone off I wait until I see a light come on so I know they made it in the house alright. I waited and waited and I never saw a light come on.”
My uncle said, “What made you think a blind man would turn a light on?”
The guy replied” Yeah, after 5-10 minutes I thought of that too.”
I’m having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by…
Not only did I fall off the diet wagon, I dragged it into the woods, set it on fire, and used the insurance money to buy cupcakes.
And under the category of REALLY BAD IDEA! …
IDOLIZING
A POLITICIAN
IS LIKE BELIEVING THE
STRIPPER REALLY
LIKES YOU!
The longer I live, the more convinced I am that this planet is used by other planets as a lunatic asylum.
“When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser.”
– Socrates
Women have only 2 problems:
1. Nothing to wear.
2. No room for all their clothes.
The older you get the more you realize how precious life is. You have no desire for drama, conflict, or stress. You just want good friends, a cozy home, food on the table, and people who make you happy.
Marriage is not about a beautiful wedding, fancy homes, cute kids, nice cars and white picket fences. Marriage is hospital stays, working long hours, fighting through struggles, paying bills, and keeping the faith and staying together through it all.
And that’s it my friends. May God Bless you and keep you until next time.
Dragon Laffs 