Good morning, campers,

While you are reading this I am in the middle of my motorcycle safety course, so please keep me in your prayers.  I’m a little nervous.  I rode to work today. Left at the earliest possible time I was allowed, by law to leave…30 minutes prior to sunrise. It was still dark when I got to work. And it was COLD out.

But I did okay. It was a little windy on the highway.

Anyway, I don’t have a lot of time to finish this for you guys, so let’s get to the good stuff…

Boy, ain’t that the truth!

A college senior took his new girlfriend to a football game. The young couple found seats in the crowded stadium and were watching the action. A substitute was put into the game, and as he was running onto the field to take his position, the boy said to his girlfriend, “Take a good look at that fellow. I expect him to be our best man next year.”

His girlfriend snuggled closer to him and said, “That’s the strangest way I ever heard of for a fellow to propose to a girl, but I’ll take it!”

Did you hear about the man that was arrested at the board game shop?
Apparently, he walked in and said he was looking for trouble.

Okay, this one is long, but it is well worth the read…

I got this one …

And then I got this one from the same person…

So…I’m not sure if I’m legally obligated to send the second one or not or whether it’s an explanation when, obviously, one is not needed. But I thought I’d give you a little behind-the-scenes of what I get to go through.

Me too!

It’s okay if you have no idea what “prefix” means.
It’s not the end of the word

Just as silly as the ones through the nose.

That is so beautiful.

A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says,  “I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers. I’ll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back.” 

The room is quiet, and no one takes up the Texans offer. One man even leaves.

Thirty minutes later the same gentleman who left shows back up and taps the Texan on the shoulder. “Is your bet still good?” asks the Irishman.

The Texan says yes and asks the bartender to line up 10 pints of Guinness. Immediately the Irishman tears into all 10 of the pint glasses, drinking them all back-to-back. The other pub patrons cheer as the Texan sits in amazement. The Texan gives the Irishman the $500 and says, “If ya don’t mind me asking, where did you go for those 30 minutes you were gone?

The Irishman replies, “Oh, I had to go to the pub down the street to see if I could do it first.”

My wife told me that I did not love any of her relatives…
I told her that is not true. I said, “I love your mother-in-law and father-in-law much more than I love mine.”

A man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without a torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head!

But the dad loves his son anyway and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion.
 
After 21 years, the son is old enough for his first drink. 

Dad takes him to the bar and tearfully tells his son he is proud of him. 

Dad orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. 

With all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol.
 
Swoooop! A torso pops out!
 
The bar is dead silent; then bursts into a whoop of joy.

The father, shocked, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant “Take another drink”! The bartender still shakes his head in dismay.
 
Swoooop! Swoooop! Two arms pops out.
 
The bar goes wild. The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again. 

The patrons chant “Take another drink”!
 
The bartender ignores the whole affair.
 
By now the boy is getting tipsy, and with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it.
 
Swoooop! Swoooop! Two legs pop out. The bar is in chaos.
 
The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God.
 
The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left…. then to the right…. right through the front door, into the street, where a truck runs over him and kills him instantly.
 
The bar falls silent. The father moans in grief.
 
The bartender sighs and says,
 
“That boy should have quit while he was a head.”

Stephanie sent me this next one and I’m sure it expresses the sentiment of an awful lot of us:

COPIED

The Turning Point

At what point, at what precipice, at what limit of liberty do WE, as a free and righteous people, turn and face the evil that confronts us?

When does the conflagration of depravity demand a flood of extinguishing?

How much longer can the parchment of Constitutional values survive the gnashing of demonic teeth?

No longer. 

Not a minute.

Not a second.

Not a nano second. 

Critical mass has been reached!

The assault on decency, common sense and morality has gone nuclear. 

The repression of speech and individual rights is a tattered banner hanging by a thread. 

Tis time to retrieve said banner and hoist it as a battle flag. 

Tis time to rise as one and vanquish the foe of insanity. 

No longer to be the audience of this insipid performance. 

No longer to step aside for this parade of perversion.

Stand, speak, demand a return to ways that set us apart!

To the foundation of this great nation!

To the grace of Godliness that was once bestowed upon our shining shores!

WE, have reached THE TURNING POINT.

– – – J. Clent Wilkinson

As he stood at the bar for the first time with his son the proud father said, “Now is as good of time to talk about some of the facts of life. Remember. a man that drinks beyond his capacity is no gentleman. To enjoy life, you must observe a happy medium. Have a drink occasionally, but never, never, never get drunk.”

“Yes sir,” replied his dutiful son, “but how am I to know when I am drunk?”

“Well, you see those two men over there in the corner?” said the father. “If you were to see four men, you’d know you were drunk.”

“Dad, let me have the keys,” grinned the son. “There’s only one guy over there.”

This is SO GOOD!!!!!!

Husband brings the child home from kindergarten and asks his wife, “He’s been crying the whole way home. Is he sick or something?”

“No,” replies wife, “he was just trying to tell you he isn’t our Frankie.”

And that’s it my friends. May God Bless you and Keep you and Smile His face upon you until we meet again.