Yes, I know, it’s just after Thanksgiving, but a couple of things here…first, there are only 7 episodes left, counting this one, before Christmas!  Second, I have a TON of Christmas cartoons, memes, and stuff to share and I’d like to share those, plus the new ones I’m sure to get from you guys between now and then without having entire ezines filled with JUST Christmas stuff, and C, this is a wonderful holiday season, why not stretch it out and enjoy it?

Although, my own Izzy Dragon committed sacrilege on Thanksgiving Day and set up our Christmas Tree!  Now, she didn’t decorate it, other than putting lights on it, but she put it UP ON THANKSGIVING!  I told her she was a HEATHEN!

I’m in the middle of studying for my New Testament final for FBI.  This one is going to be a bit harder than the Theology one was.  It’s going to be on the Epistles of John (1, 2, & 3 John) and Revelation.  So, not ALL of the New Testament.  I’m not sure if I explained this or not, but this is a 6 semester course, and I started in the 6th semester.  Each semester has a section on the Old Testament, the New Testament, and Theology.  So, next semester I’ll be in semester 1 and I will graduate in the Spring of 2027.  I’m not sure what I will get for graduating other than the satisfaction of a job well done and the ABUNDANCE of knowledge that I am gaining and the sheer enjoyment, but … well … that is more than enough.

Anyway, I think at this point, it’s time to move on to the fun stuff, don’t you?  So …

Look for it, you’ll see it.

25 Hilarious Relationships Memes Only Long Term Married Couples Would Understand

I guess we started something with the optical illusions …. here’s a couple more

Okay, this one is seriously messed up!!!!

50 Cursed Randoms to Freak You Out

Okay, I just got this texted to me and I have to ask, is there anyone out there who is actually clicking on these links?  I just click the “Report Junk” button and move on, but I feel sorry for the guy who has that phone number because you know it’s spoofed.  He’s probably getting a ton of calls.  People please, you HAVE to know that any of these unsolicited text messages like this one are pure nonsense.  Just delete them.

I think that is an awesome idea!

Unexpected cold snaps had destroyed the buds on my father’s young peach tree for two years in a row. This spring Dad was ready. He replanted the sapling in a large box, mounted it on wheels, and put the tree in the garage whenever the temperature dropped. 

One warm April day Dad was wheeling the tree out into the yard, and stopped to give our dog a drink from the garden hose. A neighbour watched the scene with amusement. “Frank,” he finally commented, “you’re the only man I know who walks his tree and waters his dog!” 

I found this next one extremely interesting…

Okay, some of these are REALLY WEIRD!!

What a GREAT idea!  I’ve got to go out and buy one of those little bitty spray cans of WD-40.  Pocket sized.

Stumpy was visiting a friend in the hospital. He was trying to stop smoking and was chewing on an unlit cigar when he got on the elevator. A lady said to him with a snarl, ‘Sir, there’s no smoking in here.’

Stumpy said, ‘I’m not smoking lady.’

‘But you have a cigar in your mouth,’ the woman said.

‘Lady, ‘ Stumpy answered, ‘I’ve got on Jockey shorts, too, but I’m not riding a horse.’ ” 

Over the years, my husband and I have usually managed to decode the cute but confusing gender signs sometimes put on restaurants’ toilet doors (Buoys and Gulls, Laddies and Lassies, etc.), but every so often we get stumped. 

Recently my husband Dave wandered off in search of the men’s room and found himself confronted by two marked doors. One was labeled “Bronco,” and the other was designated “Cactus.”

Completely baffled, he stopped a restaurant employee passing by. “Excuse me; I need to use the toilet,” Dave said. Gesturing toward the doors, he asked, “Which one should I use?” 

“Actually, we would prefer you to go there,” the employee said, pointing to a door down the hall marked “Men.” “Bronco and Cactus are private dining rooms.” 

Ned is down on his luck in Las Vegas. He has gambled away all his money and has to borrow a dime from another gambler just to use the men’s room. The stall happens to be open and he uses the dime in a slot machine and hits the jackpot. He takes his winnings and goes to the blackjack table and turns his small winnings into a million dollars.

Wealthy beyond his wildest dreams, Ned goes on the lecture circuit, where he tells his incredible story. He tells his audiences that he is eternally grateful to his benefactor, and if he ever finds the man he will share his fortune with him. After months of speaking, a man in the audience jumps up and says, “I’m that man. I was the one who gave you the dime.”

“You aren’t the one I’m looking for. I mean the guy who left the door open!”

This one is QUITE interesting!

“If you ever spent a Sunday with me instead of  playing golf I swear I would drop dead,” she screamed. 

“There’s no point in trying to bribe me,” replied the husband.

Nebraska Laws 

It is illegal for bar owners to sell beer unless  they are simultaneously brewing a kettle of soup.

This next article is from Ted.  It’s a little dated, but worth reading nonetheless, if for no other reason, so that we know.

Students Who Were Booted from Kamala Rally for Saying ‘Jesus Is Lord’ Set the Record Straight

Don’t we all know people like that?

“Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.” 

-Joan Crawford ( ? – 1977)

Camping Tips

____________

* A potato baked in the coals for one hour makes an excellent side dish. A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck. 

*You can start a fire without matches by eating Mexican food, then breathing on a pile of dry sticks. 

*In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a sling- shot made from the elastic waistband of your underwear. 

*The guitar of the noisy teenager at the next campsite makes excellent kindling. 

*Check the washing instructions before purchasing any apparel to be worn camping. Buy only those that read “Beat on a rock in stream.”

*It’s entirely possible to spend your whole vacation on a winding mountain road behind a large motor home. 

*Effective January 1, 2004, you will actually have to enlist in the Swiss Army to operate a Swiss Army Knife. 

*In an emergency, a drawstring from a parka hood can be used to strangle a snoring tent mate. 

Three Reform Rabbis were in a terrible auto wreck. None survived. One minute they were driving along the highway, talking and laughing and joking, and the next, BOOM! they were before the Creator of all.

Shaking his head, The Omnipotent One looks at the three. “Reform I can understand. But where will it end? You! Goldblum! The ashtrays in your temple so My people could smoke while the Torah was being read???” 

Goldblum shuddered. God went on. “I can live with that. Men are weak, but the Word is strong!” Goldblum sighed with relief.

“Bauman! Really, I can accept My people need to eat, but really: serving Ham Sandwiches to the devout at the temple during Yom Kippur?” Bauman hung his head in shame.

“Even that I can allow to pass, even with the eating of that which is not Kosher. I’m not pleased at all with the playing fast and loose with my people, but I can accept these indiscretions.” Bauman also heaved a sigh of relief. 

Finally, He turns to the third rabbi and says, “You, Rabinowitz, have gone too far! Am I asking too much? No, you flaunt the world at Me, even on the holiest days of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur by putting out a sign saying…. “Closed for the Holidays !!!” 

I went shopping the other day. I was only in there for about 5 minutes and when I came out there was a traffic officer writing a parking ticket. 

So I went up to him and said ‘ Come on Pal, how about giving a guy a break?’ 

He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. 

So I called him a pencil necked Nazi. 

He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having bald tires!! 

So I called him a piece of horse dung. 

He finished the second ticket and put it on the car with the first.

Then he started writing a third ticket!!! 

This went on for about 20 minutes, the more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote. 

I didn’t care.  My car was parked around the corner…….

Okay, so something told me to check on this reference, mostly, I think because I just took my New Testament test this morning.  I got a 98%!  I missed one question.  It was a question that I argued with myself over because of the way it was worded.  Very confusing and it was circular logic by my thinking.  I marked it false because of the circular thinking of it and they said it was true.  Oh well.  I’m am PERFECTLY HAPPY with a 98!  

Anyway, something told me to check on this reference and I was right.  The reference above is only the threat or the negative portion.  They should have really said, “Revelation 21: 6-8”.  Here, I’ll show you what I mean.

⁶ He said to me: “It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To the thirsty I will give water without cost from the spring of the water of life. ⁷ Those who are victorious will inherit all this, and I will be their God and they will be my children. ⁸ But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars—they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.”

Verse 8 is the consignment to hell for those who, after the 7 year tribulation are still unbelievers and unrepentant.  Verse 6 speaks of eternal life and verse 7 are invited to the wedding.  Jesus is the Groom and the Church is the Bride.  And if we continue on from verse 8 we get a further description of the Bride of the Lamb.

Two assassins are hired to kill a dictator in South America. 

They follow his every move for months, and find out that every day at noon he goes outside and does his stretching exercises.

So the assassins set up shop right across the street, get all of their sights set, load the guns, and have everything ready to go. 

Noon comes, no dictator…10 minutes longer…no dictator.

One assassin turns to the other and says, “Gee, I hope nothing happened to him.”

How many of you out there remember this guy?

And with that my friends, we are done for another episode.  Until we meet again, may you be blessed with love and happiness, comfort and warmth.